


Silent Unspeakable Memories

by rexadozonelayer



Category: Mass Effect, Mass Effect - All Media Types, Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Emotions, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Flirting, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Language, Love, Mass Effect 1, Oral Sex, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Romance, Sexual Content, Sexual Humor, Smut, Swearing, Teasing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-01
Updated: 2018-07-14
Packaged: 2018-07-19 08:00:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 22
Words: 124,637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7352674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rexadozonelayer/pseuds/rexadozonelayer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>‘What greater thing is there for two human souls than to feel that they are joined to strengthen each other, to be at one with each other, in silent unspeakable memories.’ ~George Eliot~</p><p>Having a relationship in the Alliance is difficult.  There are fraternization regs to uphold.  However, the regs are a little more lenient when it pertains to married couples.  Normally, they don’t serve on the same ship due to the possibility of the worst case scenario happening, as it does upon occasion, but in special cases it is possible to allow such instances, if there is a need.  Especially when one such couple consists of a famous ‘war hero’ badass marine and a smartass pilot who is known to be the best in the Alliance fleet.    </p><p>This is their story.  It will encompass all three Mass Effect games and beyond and will describe how their relationship survives through; the hunt for a rogue spectre, reanimation by a terrorist organization, and eventual invasion of the Reapers.  It will test everything that their relationship is built upon; romance, love, lust, laughter, terror, grief, family, and hope.  There are a few other words that come to mind about these two; stubborn, smartass, determined, loyal, dedicated…soulmates.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Surprise!

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Bioware owns all. I'm just adlibbing a bit. Comments are always welcome. 
> 
> My femshep is Rezana Shepard. She is the daughter of Admiral Steven Hackett and Hannah Shepard. She’s the goddaughter of the highly decorated Captain Anderson and knows quite a few of the other ME characters throughout the games, meeting them through other means than in the original story. As such, parts of my story will be OC and slightly AU, since I’m combining all three of the classifications (War Hero, Survivor, and Ruthless), since it is possible for one unlucky soldier to successfully complete them due to their timelines. I did say Reza was a badass, right? So, not only does she have a Star of Terra, but she also has the nickname 'The Butcher of Torfan.’ She also has the scars on her lower torso to prove that she was at Akuze. She is also a Vanguard (because they are truly crazy awesome) and a Renegon. Due to the ability of having additional talents after you play through ME1, more than once, I’m adding Infiltrator tactics to her dossier, just so she can play with a cloak & a sniper rifle. Duh.

“Have you heard Joker?”

“Busy right now, Alenko. Trying to fly the ship, remember?”

Staff Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko laughs, typical Joker response, one problem though, “Uh, we are docked.” 

“So?”

Okay, different tactic, flattery, “You could fly the ship with your eyes closed.”

“True.” 

Score! “So, have you heard the news about who our XO might be?” Kaidan asks his friend after sitting down in the co-pilots chair to run diagnostics. Kaidan met Joker several tours ago and wasn’t surprised to see that he was assigned to the Normandy as its chief pilot. They always seemed to be posted on the same ships together. Although, Jeff ‘Joker’ Moreau was a self-described egomaniac about his piloting skills, Kaidan has to admit that Joker was certainly damn good at his job. Unfortunately for him, Joker would tell him and anyone in passing that he was that good. After getting past all of Joker’s bluster up front, they had eked out a passable friendship and always seemed to enjoy each other’s company when working together. The only thing about Joker he wasn’t able to figure out was what the man did during shore leave or during their down time when transitioning from post to post in between orders. Joker was very closed off about his personal life. Maybe one day he’ll get him to open up about it, if he keeps pushing. 

“No. It’s someone boring, right? Just another pencil pusher, ass kissing, commanding officer who can’t see through the bullshit of my medical condition before noticing that I’m a damn fine pilot. Actually, just being honest here, I’m not just damn good; I’m the best in the Alliance fleet. Right? That’s my luck, anyway, with commanding officers.”

Kaidan huffs out a chuckle at his friend’s blustering, again, “Good to see that your ego hasn’t changed much. Besides, you have to let this go, Joker. Not everyone judges you by your medical profile.” 

“Really? Like you don’t get the same judgement for being an L2?”

“Point taken. Either way, if any officers judge you by your medical condition, then they aren’t worth respecting personally. Respect the rank, not the person, in their case,” Kaidan says looking at him. 

“Ah, yeah, that is something I already employ…a lot,” Joker snickers.

“Excuse me? Are you implying that I am one of those officers?”

“Geez, sensitive much? No, Alenko, you are one of the exceptions,” Joker grins and winks at Kaidan in the copilot’s chair. Joker turns back towards his haptic displays and subconsciously rubs the indentation of his dog tags through his uniform. No one knows what else dangles on the chain but he internally grins at what the token stands for and for whom…another person that never judged him for his condition, a very important person. With a heavy heart, he stops rubbing his hand over his tags and returns to what he was doing, adjusting some of the controls to fit his style of flying better. He’s interrupted out of his thoughts when Kaidan replies to being teased. 

“Thanks, I think.” Kaidan says after grimacing. 

After several minutes of them working quietly over their respective consoles, Joker asks, “So what’s the big news? Do you know who the XO is, or not?”

“Well there is a lower deck rumor that our new XO is…” Kaidan is interrupted from his tell-all when their commanding officer, Captain David Anderson walks up from the CIC. 

Kaidan gets up from his workstation and comes to attention with a salute. “Sir!”

Joker just swivels his chair around and stays seated but doesn’t salute as was his custom. He wasn’t much for protocol. But, because of his piloting reputation and his medical condition, most times it was overlooked and Captain Anderson was familiar with his behavior. 

Captain Anderson returned Kaidan’s salute and asks Joker, “Has everyone reported for duty, Flight Lieutenant?”

“Everyone but the XO and the Turian Spectre, sir,” Joker replied. 

“Oh yes, well, both Nihlus and our new XO will be late. Their mission from deep cover just came to a close and they will be joining us later after their debriefing. Once they have boarded and have been given time to settle in, I believe we can then ready for departure. Let me know when they’ve boarded Joker.” 

“Aye-Aye, sir,” Joker replies, confused as to why the Captain didn’t give any hint as to who the XO was. 

“Carry on, gentlemen,” Captain Anderson says and turns back towards the CIC. 

As David is walking back towards the galaxy map to continue plotting their course for their new mission, his lips twitch when he hears Lt. Alenko say behind him, ‘That was weird. Why do you think the Captain didn’t reveal who our XO was?’ and Joker’s response of ‘No idea.’ He almost laughed outright then, pleased with himself for keeping the surprise from his grumpy pilot. He was one of only a few that knew the relationship between his pilot and his XO. Finally allowing a small chuckle to escape, garnering him several looks from crewmen, he smirks thinking about asking the VI in the cockpit to record what happens when his XO boards the Normandy after she arrives. Aw, to be a ‘fly on the wall,’ so to speak. He rubs his hands together in anticipation and sends a brief request over his omni-tool to do just that. 

{{{}}}

“Why do debriefings always take forever!?! This is such bullshit, Nihlus. Why can’t the authorities just take our word for what happened, or at least your word? Just wave the Spectre card at them for fuck sake. I have someplace to be. Well, we both do.” Rezana Shepard says as she paces in front of her Turian partner. 

Nihlus looks at his comrade in arms (or Spectre in training…although she doesn’t know it yet) and laughs. After working with her for the past four months as her handler on this current assignment and for six months prior to that on other combat missions including some N7 work, he grins at her frustration. He agrees with her opinion on debriefings, of course, red tape does suck, but he can’t play the Spectre card because he’s supposed to evaluate her by the book. Not that Spectres really follow a ‘book’ per se, but the Alliance does, and he wants to make sure that her candidacy for the Spectres goes off without a hitch. He’s trained a lot of potentials in his tenure as a senior member of the Special Tactics and Reconnaissance division, but the fierce human currently pacing in front of him dressed as a high classed escort carrying her high heels in one hand and a pistol in the other, was one of the best candidates he’s evaluated, ever. She will end up being one of the greatest Spectres, he has no doubt, and has said so to his superiors, mainly his friend, the Turian Councilor. With Shepard’s contacts both in the Alliance and at the Citadel, she will go far and honestly, he is looking forward to working with her once again after she has been named the first human Spectre. 

Looking her over again, something he never gets tired of doing, his subvocals hum with pride for his frustrated partner. She was able to successfully infiltrate the spy ring they had been tracking and through careful manipulation and interrogation of certain members of the ring, they were able to bring their investigation to a close, this very evening. She was able to obtain the knowledge that their target, a Turian, had a thing for human women, mainly prostitutes or escorts, and had created her current persona to seduce the male into inviting her (and him covertly) back to his quarters, where they were able to finally take the guy out. Although having seen Shepard’s skill as a talented vanguard biotic before on their other combat missions, he found that seeing her in her current getup was a little distracting. If not for her bonded status (lucky bastard), he would have initiated blowing off steam with her many months ago. Sleeping with a partner wasn’t unheard of, especially for fellow Spectres, but she was very adamant that she was taken and didn’t talk much about her mate. But there were times since he had known her when she had looked nostalgic and her eyes would light up or she would smile in that way, when something occurred that would remind her of whoever he was. 

Sighing greatly at the loss of a female such as Rezana, he replies to her, “I’m shocked, Shepard. This is protocol for the end of a mission. I thought you were a by-the-book soldier,” he says trying to keep a straight face without giving away that he was teasing her since he knows that she is anything but. 

Reza glares at her Turian friend and sticks her tongue out at him making his strict visage crack as he chuckles at her antics, “Pfft. Blow it out your hole, Nihlus. Turian bastard. Rules and regulations aren’t your thing either.” 

He chuckles, used to her bluster and strange sayings by now. “Aw, but I’m a Spectre, aren’t I. I can bend the rules, if needed. You can’t.”

Reza just glares at him and huffs out a sigh. “Fine. I’ll play nice, for now. I’m just anxious about getting to our new posting, mostly so I can change out of this disaster of a dress and see my mentor, Captain Anderson. Apparently, I’m to be his XO on the new Alliance warship he’s commanding,” she says keeping her voice low, so their conversations can’t be overheard by the security personnel going over the details of their investigation. 

“Agreed. I’m looking forward to serving on this new Human/Turian designed ship, as well.”

“Really? I thought you’d want to get back to the Citadel. You know, back to your old boring life of spectre-ing on your own, without your awesome partner at your side, livening things up,” she says smirking at him. 

Nihlus laughs, “Yeah, solitary life without smart ass comments at every turn, does sound amazing, but I guess joining you on this shakedown mission can’t hurt. I think I can handle a few more weeks in your company.”

“Have I ever mentioned that I hate you?”

“Eh…once or twice…a day,” Nihlus says laughing. 

{{{}}}

After, the Commander in charge of their investigation and debriefing gave the ‘all clear’ to leave, Nihlus and Reza departed to catch a cab to the docks, to report for their next assignment. Earlier that day, they had both arranged for their other possessions to be dropped off at the ship and only packed a small ‘go bag’ for their OP. Although, now Reza wished she hadn’t, since going back to their hotel was a welcome thought, just to change. Oh, well, can’t be helped now. 

Noticing that Shepard was walking funny on her four inch heels, he laughs and asks a little curious, “How do you walk in those? Aren’t they uncomfortable? And, where did you hide your pistol, I didn’t see you holster it?” 

“To answer your first question…very carefully. I’m not used to wearing heels and yes, they are uncomfortable. And, second, wouldn’t you like to know.”

Nihlus grumbles low into his subvocals over her latter statement and looks her up and down trying to determine where she may have hid the pistol. 

Reza chuckles and bumps her shoulder with his when he stays quiet. Seeing that he was covertly checking her out, she says, “Come on, nosey, let’s get out of here. I’m tired of getting the stink eye from the neighbors.”

“Stink…eye? Oh, you mean the looks that you are getting in that dress? To be honest, you will make quite an entrance, which no one will ever forget.” Nihlus says sniggering.

“Shut it, you. I’m trying to figure out how I can change in the cab without both you and the camera noticing.”

“Not possible,” Nihlus says not helping the situation. Not only would he enjoy the show but he also knows that the cameras in the cab were unhackable, since he has tried often to do so, on his many missions. Well at least the cabs on Arcturus, anyway. The ones on the Citadel? Easy. 

“Great. Oh well. I’m already famous for my stint on Elysium and Torfan, why not for this too.” Reza grimaces, not looking forward to their arrival. 

Nihlus chuckles again, following her into the cab waiting for them, and nods in agreement. It will be ‘quite’ the show. He’s looking forward to it. 

{{{}}}

Joker looks up when Kaidan stands up from his chair and stretches. “Later, Joker, I’m off to catch some shut eye, so I can look presentable for when we meet our XO tomorrow.”

“I don’t know why you won’t share the scuttlebutt with me regarding who our XO is?”

“I’m just making up for all those times when you knew more than me on our previous missions,” Kaidan says smirking at him.

“Pfft…” Joker was just about to retaliate with a smart ass comment when ‘betty bitchbox’ the VI made an announcement from the airlock.

(Spectre Nihlus Kryik and Lieutenant Commander Rezana Shepard, Executive Officer, requesting entry to the Normandy.)

What!?! You’ve got to be kidding! Rez was here? Reza Shepard…the XO of the Normandy? Oh, shit, yeah! Joker smiled to himself and swiveled his chair around so he could stand up and salute her once she was let in from the decon chamber. 

“Permission granted.” Kaidan says before he can think to do the same. Joker looks at Kaidan as he starts to bounce a little in his excitement in meeting the famous Commander Shepard.

However, before he can fully stand up to show the respect she deserves, he is bowled over by the sight of her once she walks onto the bridge. Oh holy hell, he can’t stop staring. His mouth pops open and he sits back down just so he doesn’t fall down. Not that he would notice. She hasn’t noticed him yet as she looks about the bridge’s walkway and says something to the Turian behind her. He, however, has gone deaf. The only thing his brain is able to do is drink in the site of Rez as she comes to a standstill as she finally notices him. Their eyes meet as if they are magnets and she smiles at him making his heart flip-flop. 

Joker’s eyes widen as he drinks in the site of her. She is a vision. Oh, holy hell, that dress is going to kill him. The dress she’s wearing would make any guy cum in his pants just looking at her. She’s a walking wet dream. She’s wearing a silver sheath of a dress made of silk? that flows over her body like she just poured it on, ending about mid-thigh. The dress is low cut both in front and in back and was sleeveless, staying on with spaghetti straps that molded around her toned arms. She was also wearing those arm sheaths that the Asari wear that end at her hands, probably to hide several hidden knives, he guessed. His eyes continue their downward slide as he recognizes the slight bulge of what is probably her favorite pistol in a thigh holster and does a double take on her high-heeled sandals showing that she has painted her toenails the color of her eyes; lavender. He runs his starving gaze up over her lithe soldier physique with all the right curves; breasts that make a man drool and an ass that begs to be grabbed, and…oh FUCK…forgetting that he wasn’t alone in the cockpit with her, he reddens. Thank the Gods he is sitting down. Trying to think quickly of something else that doesn’t involve sliding his fingers through her long black hair that is currently encased in a high bun showing off her neck encircled by a necklace he recognizes as one he gave her…uh…that doesn’t help, he closes his eyes and tries desperately to shake himself out of the lust filled stupor he’s let himself fall into just at the sight of her. 

“At ease, gentlemen.”

Kaidan starts suddenly from his own perusal of his XO’s body and reddens in embarrassment at getting caught staring. He stumbles a bit from his mid salute and introduces himself to the goddess in front of him, “Staff Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko, Ma’am. I’m your head of marine detail and a member of your ground team.”

After pulling her eyes away from the site of Joker on the bridge, she looks at the dark haired man currently sticking his hand out to shake. “Lieutenant Alenko, it is nice to meet you. Lieutenant Commander Rezana Shepard, your new Executive Officer.” 

After holding her hand a little too long, Kaidan releases her and smiles sheepishly saying, “It is an honor meeting you, Ma’am!”

Aw, another fanboy. Pity. Well, if he doesn’t cut it in the field and gets too pushy, she’ll straighten him out or boot him off the ship. She smiles and looks from him to the gasping pilot and back again.

After taking the hint, Kaidan looks over at his suddenly quiet friend and introduces him to her, “My abnormally quiet friend here, is Flight Lieutenant Jeff ‘Joker’ Moreau, Ma’am, he’s assigned as Normandy’s chief pilot.”

Reza is thrilled. So Joker is her pilot. This news has just made the frustrations of the past four months without communication worth the wait. When Joker opens his eyes to look up at her, she smiles at him and winks, “Nice to see you again, Flight Lieutenant.”

His voice husky, he says, “Likewise,” as his eyes finds hers sparkling in arousal at seeing him and he nods at her grinning. 

Kaidan looks between the goddess in front of him that is just dripping with sex making him want to moan at just the sight of her and his grumpy friend, “You two know each other, Ma’am?”

Reza looks at the Lt briefly before looking back at the welcome sight of Joker, and says, “Yes. We met just after the Blitz.”

“Huh.” Alenko says, then because he just now noticed a tall Turian behind his XO, he says sticking his hand out, “You must be the Spectre, Nihlus is it?” 

Nihlus looks between his partner and the pilot and sniffs the air, AH, so the bearded man in the chair is Shepard’s mate. As a Turian, his sense of smell was extremely heightened and as soon as he followed Reza into the cockpit, he was struck with the overpowering smell of arousal that was coming off of his partner and the seated bearded human. It was obvious that they were mated, after observing their reactions at seeing each other and of course, how Reza was dressed. It was also obvious that the two of them were unaware that they would be serving together. Thanking the Spirits that humans couldn’t hear his subvocals he was laughing at the scene in front of him. If Reza knew, she would kill him. Knowing that Shepard was Captain Anderson’s protégé and goddaughter, he coughed to hide a more vocal chuckle, realizing that the sneaky bastard knew about his pilot and XO’s relationship and wanted to surprise them. Ha! Now this was a show he was looking forward to watching. 

Remembering the other human’s question and human gesture that he was familiar with, after working with their kind so often, he nods and shakes the Lt’s hand. “Lt Alenko, could you lead us to your Captain? We need to report in.”

Reza pulls her gaze away from Joker, reluctantly, when she hears Nihlus’ request. Clearing her throat, she remembers that she needs to act like the XO of this ship. Damn it! Sometimes, being an officer and in charge, can suck ass. Mentally shaking herself, she looks at Nihlus and the Lt, and says, “Yes, good idea. Lead on LT.” She waits until they move down the walkway out of hearing range and turns back towards Joker. He smiles back at her. “I’ll see you later, Flight Lieutenant; we have some catching up to do.”

His eyes widen and his smile changes to a leer, “Yes, yes we do.”

She winks at him and turns to walk away to catch up with the Turian and Lt. Alenko. 

{{{}}} 

Watching Rez walk away never gets old, Joker thinks to himself. With that getup she’s wearing, he groans as he notices her shimmy her hips a little to give him a show, but not too much, since they are in public. To everyone else, she may just walk that way, but knowing her as he does, he knows that she is doing it on purpose because of how it affects him. He shakes the lustful thoughts out of his head, DAMN IT Rez!, there was no way in hell he was going to be able to get back to work. Remembering that he was under orders to report to the Captain that their XO was now onboard, he pauses just before he swivels the chair to do just that, when he notices what his suddenly quiet crewmates were staring at. He grimaces when he sees that all the males were all staring at Rez’s ass as she stalks forward into the CIC. Most of the crew, he’s not worried about, however there was one person in particular who could be a problem, his good buddy Kaidan. He knew that as Rez’s Staff Lieutenant and ground team member, he would have access to Rez more often and Joker suddenly feels uncomfortable. Crap. Kaidan isn’t making it easier, either, as Joker notices that Kaidan can’t keep his eyes off Rez’s ass as she walks in front of him and the Turian as Kaidan introduces her to some of the staff. Shit. Shit. Shit. 

Trying to stifle his anger, he swivels his chair around and tries to get his head on straight before contacting his CO. He pushes the comm button for Anderson’s quarters and waits for him to respond. 

“What is it, Joker?”

“Uh…sir,” he says hoarsely, trying to regain his speaking ability, “Our XO and the Turian Spectre has boarded, sir.”

A pause, and then, “Is there something wrong, Joker?”

“No,” he mutters, “No, Sir. I’m just fine, sir.”

“Uh huh. Glad to hear it.”

Joker pauses suddenly as a thought occurs to him. “One question, sir.”

“Go ahead.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

Captain Anderson laughs, “I couldn’t ruin the surprise, Joker. You can count us even now.”

“What?” not understanding what the Captain meant.

“You surprise me by stealing my ship to prove a point; I surprise you with your wife as my XO.”

Joker rolls his eyes and grumbles at the man he’s known his whole life, “You dirty bastard…Sir.”

“Ha! You’re welcome. Your wife just arrived and ‘Wow!’ now I know why everyone is talking about her suddenly. I think your shift just ended, Flight Lieutenant. Why don’t you join us in my quarters? We have some things to discuss.”

Joker gapes at his Captain and clears his throat again so he can respond, “Aye-Aye, Captain.”


	2. Reunion

“Come in Commander…Nihlus,” Captain Anderson says returning the salute from Reza and Lt. Alenko. “You are dismissed, Lt.”

After Reza and Nihlus walk into his inner office in his quarters, Captain Anderson turns toward the Lt. and snaps his fingers in front of his face to distract him from his musings over Reza’s ass.

Kaidan jerks and looks up at his CO’s face and blushes, “I’m sorry sir, right away sir,” and retreats. 

David shakes his head and tries not to smile at the Lt’s embarrassment and follows his XO into his inner sanctum to see Reza glaring at Nihlus as he chuckles from the Lt’s apparent interest. He decides to intervene and says to the Turian Spectre, “Nice to see you again, Nihlus.”

“Likewise, Captain.”

Reza looks between the two of them and asks, “You two know each other?”

Nihlus smirks at her and says, “I helped with the design of the Normandy.”

“My, aren’t you a font of information today,” Reza says glowering at her partner.

David chuckles, “Don’t be too hard on him, Commander, he couldn’t exactly share that information prior to now, could he.”

“I suppose you’re right,” Reza grumbles glaring at her partner standing in front of her clicking his mandibles in a Turian version of a smirk. She ignores him and accepts the hug that David gives her. Once she pulls away, she asks, “How are you doing, sir?”

“Sir? When we are here in my quarters, Reza, you can call me David. You know that.”

“Yeah, well it has been some time since we served together, David.”

“True. So, how did your last assignment fair?” David asks the two of them after inviting them to sit.

After declining, Nihlus says, “It went very well. Your protégé is very talented. She was able to infiltrate the inner circle and take out the one in charge, quite easily.”

David smiles at Reza and then looks over her attire and notes her grimace as she takes off her shoes once seated, “I guess that is why you are in that getup and not in uniform, yes?”

“Yeah, I thought maybe an Alliance uniform might tip off our target a little too much. So I went with this getup. That asshole had a thing for the high class hooker type. So…” Reza waves at herself. 

“So, you dressed up. Huh. I’m impressed. I’ve never seen you wear a dress before. Well, not a dress like that one, and not since you were a little girl. Did you coerce the guy at gunpoint to take you home with him, because I can’t imagine you having enough charm to do it without violence,” David says trying to look innocent, his lips twitching. 

Reza looks up at her mentor and godfather and flips him off before going back to rubbing her feet. 

“My point exactly,” He says, finally laughing. 

Reza glares at her mentor and then at her partner, since Nihlus can’t stop laughing either. “Pfft. I can be charming…what about Joker? He and I are married. I must have used a little charm to get married. And what do you mean you’ve never seen me wear a dress, I got married in one.” 

“Ha! How that happened, I have no idea. Joker is even less charming than you and you’re a N7 marine, who names her weapons. Plus, wearing your ‘dress’ uniform to your wedding, doesn’t count.” 

Reza looks between her chortling Turian friend and her laughing mentor and rolls her eyes. He may have a point. “Speaking of which, why didn’t you tell me that my husband was the pilot?”

“Yeah, that. Well, I think I’ll let him tell you how that played out,” David says uncomfortable, knowing how protective she is about her husband.

“Uh oh, must be bad if you aren’t willing to tell me. What the hell did he do?”

David shakes his head and with a grimace, “Uh… let’s just say that if it had gone differently, he would not only be CAT6, but thrown in the brig…forever.

“Crap…What the fuck? Did he steal the Normandy or something?”

Nothing but silence fills the room.

Reza gaped, that silence was really telling, “Shit…Really?” she says a little awed at the gall of her husband.

“Rezana…” 

“What? That takes balls. As one of my Krogan buddies would say, he’s got a quad! Come on, you have to admire what he did. I take it, since he is officially the chief pilot of the Normandy, that he was pardoned?” Reza asks.

David laughs a little, not really surprised that Reza wasn’t pissed at what Joker did. “Yeah, basically he showed the brass that he was the best pilot for the job and the Turian general who was overseeing the test flight was very impressed. He was quite brilliant, Rez. If not for the insubordination, he really showed the brass what this ship can do. That is why he was offered the job as chief pilot. It also helped that I am the CO of this mission. It’s not as if I would let the husband of my favorite goddaughter go to jail, now would I.”

“Guess not. Thank you for that,” Rez says smiling at him. Then she scowls, “Wait a sec…favorite goddaughter? I’m your only goddaughter…”

“Right. Mostly, I didn’t want to incur your wrath. You are someone I really wouldn’t want to piss off,” David says sweetly but with a grimace. 

“Puleaze, as if you wouldn’t be able to take care of yourself,” Reza says smiling at him and flipping off Nihlus as he once again starts laughing at their banter as he leans against the bulkhead.

David laughs outright again, as seeing how Reza and Nihlus have gotten along since their rocky beginning ten months ago. “I see that you two have become friends.”

“Yeah, I guess he’s okay. This Turian bastard,” pointing at him, “Is a hard task master. How much longer am I going to be working with him? I think I could use a vacation,” Reza whispers loud enough so anyone in the room could overhear.

Nihlus smirks at her, “Harhar, squishy human.” He laughs when she sticks her tongue out at him and then ducks when she throws one of her shoes at him. 

David looks between them and shakes his head smiling. It looks as though his initial instinct for pairing them up was the right thing to do for Reza’s Spectre evaluation. Good, her father will be pleased. At the chime at his door, he walks over to where Reza’s shoe landed after striking the wall and says after throwing it back at her, returning to business, “That should be your husband, Reza. I invited him to join us, since we need to discuss the ground rules, since as you know, there are frat regs regarding married couples serving on the same ship. Plus, you are technically his superior officer.” 

Reza stands up to respond and pauses when she notices that her dress has risen too far upwards and too far downwards while sitting. “Stupid fucking dress,” she mumbles not noticing the reactions of the two men in the room; Nihlus’ eyes once again ogling her assets and David coughing and turning away. 

David decides now is not the time to admonish Reza about wearing a dress like the one she is wearing and not understanding how she makes most males and some females in any room uncomfortable, because she just doesn’t see how incredibly beautiful she is. Poor Steven. He doesn’t envy his best friend, well not at least for this issue. He’s suddenly really glad that he wasn’t around during her teen years when she was bounced between her father’s and mother’s ships. Thank the Gods she is married now and he doesn’t have to bail her out of the brig anymore after putting would be admirers in the hospital. Joker better know how lucky he is. 

David clears his throat bringing all of them into focus. Reza looks up after straightening everything out and says, “Yes, sir, I understand that there will be ground rules.”

“Good.” David says as he walks over to the door and lets Joker in, who ambles into the room on his crutches.

Nihlus steps off to the side so as not to get in his way and does a double take at not only his crutches but his leg braces as well. 

Joker pauses next to him and clears his throat making the Spectre look at him. “Is there a problem?” Joker says as he glares at the Turian. 

Nihlus looks at him and then at Reza leaning against the table, “Not at all. Joker, is it? It is a pleasure to meet you.”

Joker looks the Turian over suspiciously, then shrugs and says, “Uh huh,” and walks further into the space to lean up against the bulkhead across from Reza.

Nihlus looks at David and laughs when he sees David roll his eyes at Joker’s response. 

Joker looks at Reza and winks, “Commander Shepard.”

She looks back at him and nods, “Flight Lieutenant.”

“That’s all you have to say to me after four months?”

“No, but not in present company.”

“Right.” 

David looks at his protégé and his pilot and laughs again. He hasn’t laughed this much in a long long time. He has missed his goddaughter. Just having her around is a breath of fresh air and he is suddenly looking forward to the next several weeks. Life with Reza is usually exciting and adventurous. 

When they tear their gazes from each other and look at him, he says, “I’m going to grab some coffee and get Nihlus set up with quarters. I’ll be back in 10 minutes, so we can talk. Want anything while I’m at the mess?” After getting two negatives, he smiles and waves at Nihlus to follow him out of the room to give the kids some privacy. 

Nihlus walks out after the Captain and joins him at the counter as the Captain makes himself a coffee and a dextro tea for him. He looks back towards the Captain’s quarters where he is sure that Reza and her husband are getting caught up. If he was only given 10 minutes with his mate, after a four month hiatus, he would use every second. Curious about the human his partner has mated with, he asks, “So, that’s Joker. What…?”

David turns towards Nihlus and interrupts his unspoken question, “Joker has Vrolik Syndrome. It is a disease which causes extreme brittleness to his bones, thus the crutches.” David pauses and looks at the Turian next to him and notices that he’s looking thoughtful. “You’re probably wondering how a strong marine such as Reza, could end up with a guy like Joker. Yes?”

Nihlus looks back at the Captain, “To be honest, not really,” he says surprising David. “After working with Reza as long as I have, I am starting to understand who she is and what she fights for. She may be one of the fiercest warriors I’ve ever met, but she also has a big heart. She cares for those who cannot protect themselves and is willing to do whatever she has to do to accomplish it. Plus, I have to agree with you, Joker is less charming than she is, however, they seem to complement each other. They are probably a lot alike. I also think he centers her. I saw that as soon as we boarded the Normandy.”

“I see that I misjudged you.” David says nodding at the Turian Spectre. He smiles, “You are definitely the right partner for my girl. I’m glad that I recommended you to mentor her.” David laughs, “Also, I see that she has rubbed off on you too.”

“Rubbed…off? Oh, you mean that I have picked up some of her more annoying habits,” Nihlus says smiling.

David chuckles, “Yes. She is very influential in her own right. Her cheekery is contagious.”

Nihlus looks confused for a minute, ‘cheekery’ is not a word according to his translator. Must be one of those made up words that Reza likes to use when she is being a smartdonkey, which is supposed to be funny.

David pours himself a coffee and hands Nihlus his tea, “Let’s get you situated; you must be tired after your mission. Plus, we should talk about where to go from here regarding the evaluation you are conducting.”

“Good idea,” Nihlus says as he follows the Captain out of the mess hall. 

{{{}}}

As soon as the door slides shut, Reza glides into Jeff’s embrace and kisses him with all the lust she feels for him after being away from him for so long, gently pushing him up against the wall subconsciously watching out for his fragile body. She has learned over their time together how to treat his condition with the greatest care but also not to insult him in the process. 

When she feels wet tears on her cheeks, she starts suddenly noting that they are hers. She separates from her husband so they can both breathe in much needed air and says huskily, “I’ve missed you so much.”

“Gawd Rez, you have no idea, how much I’ve missed you too.” 

Reza runs her hand across his bearded face, memorizing it again after being away for so long. She gives him another heated kiss and whimpers against him when one of his hands slides down her back to cup her ass through her dress. His crutches fall to the floor with a clatter startling them and they pull apart laughing. He leans into her again and brushes her tears away with his thumb as she soaks up his embrace, letting the side of her that is touching the cold surface of the bulkhead to take the most of their weight, as his other arm wraps around her again. 

“Don’t cry, my love. You know that I can’t take it when you cry, even when you are happy.”

“I’m just so glad to see you. If only I could’ve communicated with you during my mission. Let’s just say it was extremely difficult, especially when I knew you were here on Arcturus.” 

“You were here? I thought you were on the Citadel?”

“Only the past two weeks. I’m sorry, my love, I was under orders.”

“I understand. I don’t like it, but I understand. The life of an Alliance soldier…” Joker says wistfully.

“…A married Alliance soldier,” Reza says correcting him.

Joker looks at the time on his omni-tool, “Speaking of which, we have seven minutes, do you think we could…?” he looks at the table and then at her waggling his eyebrows.

Reza looks thoughtfully at the table and then at him, “No.” At his frown, she says, “Nothing more than all night would satisfy me.”

Jeff looks at his wife and smiles, kissing her again, “Ok. I’ll take your suggestion, over mine.”

“You will, huh? Not that I wouldn’t take you up on your quickie suggestion, it’s just…this is David’s office. I wouldn’t want to uh…ewww.”

Joker laughs, “Good point.” He looks smugly at her, “Maybe we can christen another area of the ship?”

Rez chuckles, “You can bet your sweet ass we will. If we have a chance, we will find more than one place.”

Joker groans. Having his barely clad wife in his arms again after practicing celibacy for four months was really getting to him. He is aching and hard and has been since seeing her walk onto the Normandy. It is his turn to whimper when she takes his silence from her statement to start nibbling down his neck to the sensitive spot on his clavicle and one of her hands drifts down his uniform towards the bulge in his trousers. Not one to say ‘no’ ever, to his wife, he stutters breathlessly and since they don’t have the time and this is definitely not the place, he reluctantly says, “Rezana…”

“Hmm?” she says as she licks his neck and sucks on his earlobe making him gasp while her other hand starts to rub his cock through his trousers up and down making him groan and gasp. 

“Ca…Cap…Oh yes, right there…Captain’s quart…mmm…ers…remember?” Joker gasps again and shuts his eyes letting his head fall back against the wall at the overwhelming feelings being stirred by her hand on his cock.

Rez sighs and stops, pulling back away from her beautifully hard husband making him moan at the loss of not only her touch but her body against him too. She grins impishly, “Sorry…got distracted for a minute. You are a very tempting and delicious target.” 

“Oh? You can take aim at me anytime, babe.” Using the same words they’ve said many times to each other before. 

“You can bet on it.” Reza says and moves into him again to kiss him briefly before stepping back and noticing he’s trembling. It’s probably mostly from lust but she bets that some of it is from his condition. “Let’s sit. Maybe that will help you settle a bit before David comes back,” she says going easy on him as she eyes the large bulge of his cock in his uniform trousers.

Joker smirks at her, enjoying the ogling and hobbles over to the table taking a chair as she grabs his crutches and leans them against the desk nearest his chair for easy access and then sits in the chair next to him. 

Trying to change the topic from their mutual lust for each other, she asks him curious, “Did you know that we would be serving together?”

Joker takes her hand in his and intertwines their fingers, giving her a faux frown for trying to be sneaky by sliding her hand up his lap toward his cock again, making him shift in his chair trying to get comfortable. “No. That dirty bastard didn’t tell me a thing. It wasn’t until after you arrived that he finally told me.” 

Reza giggles in reflex to getting not only caught trying to fondle him again, but also the name calling for the Captain. “Did you call him that to his face?” knowing that her husband wouldn’t even flinch at doing so.

“No. Over the comm.” 

“Hmm, you are losing your touch.”

“Oh, really? Later, I’ll show you just how in touch I still am,” Joker growls as he pulls his wife into him and kisses her as his free hand cups her breast and flicks her nipple making her moan into his mouth. 

Wanting desperately to straddle him and take things further, Reza sighs into him, and pulls away a few inches to look at him and stroke his bearded face. She knows that taking their lust for each other any further at this time would not only be a bad idea, but she doesn’t want to embarrass her mentor, since their ten minutes has come and gone. Groaning at the continued torture of her breast in his hand, she tries to distract him, “I like the beard by the way. Very sexy.”

Joker pauses in his ministrations, understanding that again this was not the time or place, he stops and kisses her briefly. “Thanks, babe, I was tired of shaving. Plus, I remembered that you once said that you liked facial hair on guys.”

Grrrrowwwl, Reza purrs making him smile, “I like facial hair on ‘you,’ not guys. Only you. Forever.” 

“Always!”

“So, no one knew I was going to be the XO? Or did David just keep ‘you’ in the dark,” Reza asks curious.

Joker laughs, “You know that there are no secrets on a ship, or at least, not for long.” At her nod, he continues, “Scuttlebutt from the lower decks mentioned that the XO was a famous ‘war hero,’ but nothing concrete until you walked in.” He smirks at her when she rolls her eyes at the ‘war hero’ crack, “I like the dress by the way,” he looks at her with a leer and waggles his eyebrows at her again.

“Yeah, Nihlus did say that I was going to make an entrance in this getup.”

“That’s an understatement of the century.”

“Pfft. Whatever. I didn’t have much choice. There wasn’t anywhere to change before coming aboard. Besides, I didn’t think you would appreciate a recording of me changing my clothes in the back of a skycab or my Turian partner ogling me doing just that.”

Joker frowns, “Not likely.”

“So, here I am.” She says reddening.

“Babe, I am definitely not complaining, but you have racked up quite a few oglers around the ship and it won’t stop, even once you are in uniform again.” She looks at him startled, and he sighs, she never understands just how HOT she really is and why he is the luckiest bastard in the entire galaxy for being able to call her wife. He knows this, but having all the attention that she gets, it does bother him a bit. He knows it’s due to his condition. When he catches her looking inquiringly at him, he sighs, “I might be a little jealous.”

“Jeff, you know I would never…” 

He interrupts her, “I know. You knew me to be a jealous bastard when you married me.”

She smiles sweetly at him and kisses him before straightening in her chair, “And I love you anyway.” Changing the topic, she says, “So, I take it you were left in the dark because you did something you shouldn’t have done, even though it paid off in the end?”

Joker looks at her aghast, “You know about that, me stealing the Normandy?”

“David told me. Or rather, I guessed.”

Joker looks away suddenly sheepish, “Yeah, he said it was payback for the stunt I played with the Normandy.”

Reza cups his cheek and turns his face back towards her, “Never do that, again, my love. You know I can’t live without you and I would happily ruin my career to bust you out of jail. Then we could go pirate and live like kings.”

Joker laughs and then sobers, “It’s this damn ego of mine. I couldn’t stand the thought that they wouldn’t consider me because of my condition.”

“Jackasses, all of them.”

“Right? But I showed them, Rez. I showed them not only what I could do, but what this ship could do. They didn’t even know that for themselves. And, the other pilot that they were going to use, only graduated fifth in his class. Fifth. He was a dull stone, Rez, stupid beyond measure and a bully too. Trust me, I know." 

“What is his name? I’ll…”

“No Rez…I took care of it. Once I was pardoned and was offered the position…that was the best revenge.” He kisses her and whispers in her ear making her shiver, “But thanks anyway for the offer…”

“Good. I am proud of you, love. I do want you to know that. You definitely have a quad,” Joker chuckles, familiar with the Krogan saying, “I’m not denying that. Plus, I’m not really one to follow the rules either.” She says pausing to faux glare at him as he scoffs, “And, I can’t deny that I will enjoy serving on the same ship with you no matter how brief, but I would like it if you would be a little less adventurous. You see I plan on having many years with this husband of mine and he needs to be readily available to be taken advantage of as often as possible, because I just can’t seem to keep my hands off of him.” 

Joker laughs and looks at her with warmth, “Well the feeling is mutual for his wife.”

Reza and Joker smile at each other and lean in to kiss; finally breaking apart when the chime on the door rings giving them warning that their CO was back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N 1: Rezana's dress is inspired by the slinky one that Carrie Bradshaw wore for the ad on the side of the bus in the series 'Sex and the City,' minus the Asari arm sheaths and thigh holster, of course.
> 
> A/N 2: As far as Joker is concerned, I prefer his nickname over his given name of 'Jeff.' In this story, most people call him that too and as far as the game, I think most of the characters referred to him as Joker except EDI & Doc Chakwas. So, it seems possible that even his wife would do so too. She'll revert to his given name on occasion, but not often. 
> 
> A/N 3: Come on, if you haven't figured out the translation of 'smartdonkey' by now...It just makes sense that some of the translators everyone uses may not directly translate words used by their companions. :P


	3. Ground Rules

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: This chapter is NSFW. This story is rated 'E' for a reason. Just saying...

When David walks back into his cabin he sees his two favorite lovebirds sitting side by side, smiling at each other. He waves off Reza’s salute and sits down across the table from them. “Please tell me that you were able to stay professional and not sully my new digs.”

Joker winks at his CO and says, “Mostly.”

David grimaces and then laughs when Reza slightly cuffs her husband about the head with her hand. 

“Ow.”

“Do you want me to kiss and make it better?”

Joker looks at his wife who is sticking her bottom lip out and motioning a cry, by rolling her fists in front of her eyes. He pinches her side making her yelp.

“Ok, you two,” David says laughing as Reza glares at Joker as he looks innocently at her.

Then Reza burrows under Joker’s arm, the one closest to her, and lays her head on his shoulder pouting up at him. He smirks and wraps his arm around her shoulder, laying his forehead against hers and closing his eyes, sharing the same breath.

David takes a holo of them quickly from his omni-tool. They are seldom so affectionate with others around. Mostly he sees them tease each other mercilessly. A surge of pride comes over him at seeing these kids so happy with each other. Not many know that he was the one who introduced them. It took a while, since they’re the most stubborn kids he knows, two peas in a pod really. However, after encouraging them both, they finally saw what he saw all along, that they were perfect for each other. There were speedbumps of course; Akuze and Torfan, mainly. Anyone living through those horrors was bound to have some scars. The long absences between tours and Reza’s ‘N’ training didn’t help much, plus all the surgeries and other family bullshit that Joker had to suffer through for his condition…Hell, just the fact that they are now happily married says a lot for the two in front of him. The love that they feel for one another is clearly obvious, by just how they are together in these moments. It’s too bad really, that this tour is only temporary, or at least until Reza becomes a Spectre. Right. Back to work. He clears his throat and waits for them to look at him. “First of all, welcome back Reza, from a successful mission. Also, thank goodness, I didn’t have to throw you in the brig, Joker. Knowing you two as I do, I know how that would have turned out.”

Joker pipes up, “Yeah, Rez mentioned that I would be busted out and we would become very successful pirates.”

David looks at the two of them and grimaces, “I have no doubt.”

“No worries, David. We are here now, right where you can keep your eyes on us, making sure we don’t get into any mischief,” Reza says with a straight face. 

David scoffs and Joker turns away and mumbles something like ‘I call bullshit,’ under his breath. 

David groans and exclaims, “What he says.”

“Be that as it may, David, we are aware that married folks don’t usually serve on the same ship. Thank you by the way, for allowing us to stay together. As you know it has been a long time since we spent more than a few days with each other.”

David nods at the two of them, “Well, this shakedown cruise is only a couple weeks. Due to certain circumstances about this mission, it just seemed prudent that you will both stay on board. Just please be professional. Or at least, as professional as you both can muster, while on duty.”

They look at each other in mock hurt. Reza makes a loud kissy kissy noise and Joker reverts to blowing raspberries.

David rolls his eyes and interrupts their childish behavior and adds, “Fine, fine. I get it. You aren’t children anymore, or at least not when provoked.” Reza winks at her godfather and Joker laughs. “By the way, Reza, your father is aware of the situation and has given approval.” 

Both Reza and Joker flinch slightly. Reza asks, “Dad knows? I’m surprised.” 

“Admiral Hackett knows everything Reza, you know that.” 

“True.”

“Ok. Be professional to each other as well.” David looks at Joker, “Reza is still your superior officer, Flight Lieutenant. Please treat her as such.” 

Joker says seriously, “Of course, sir.”

“As you both are aware, due to Reza’s notoriety and her parents, please keep your relationship private. Or at least as private as you can from the crew. You may tell a few key people, of course, but only those you trust.”

Joker grimaces and looks away. Of course, he knows about that little tidbit. He hates not being able to crow about the fact that the famous ‘Commander Shepard,’ is his wife. In fact, her name is actually, ‘Rezana Moreau.’ He huffs out a sigh. Yeah, he knew going in that their marriage would have to be hidden away from everyone. It sucks the big one, but in truth, he knows that she is worth it. She is the love of his life, his soulmate. He is nothing without her and although there are times when he doesn’t believe it, she feels the same about him. 

“Hey, you okay?” Reza asks him cupping his cheek to turn his head towards her. She hates it that she can’t share her relationship status with the galaxy. But, to be safe from those that would use the knowledge against her, her family, or him, they have to keep it secret for the time being. The whole ‘safe’ scenario is why she originally used her mother’s maiden name, ‘Shepard’ and not ‘Hackett.’ 

Joker cups the back of her head and brings her face into his, to kiss her. “Yeah, I’m okay, my love. It’s worth it. You’re worth it.”

She kisses him back. Then they break apart and look back at their CO who is trying hard not to show the emotion of sadness that their situation emits. That is the only downside to their relationship. He takes their hands and squeezes them. Then he shakes his head and straightens. Back to business. 

“Okay. I want to be clear, I can’t have the rest of the crew thinking that I’m playing favorites, even though I’m your godfather, Reza, and served with your father, Jeff, and have known you just as long.” 

“Although you plainly are, you mean. Playing favorites.”

David frowns at him, “Watch it, Flight Lieutenant.”

“You mean you were lying at our wedding?” Joker says eyes wide. He flinches a little at the small squeeze on his arm from his wife who is biting her lip, trying not to laugh. 

When all David does is glare at him, he sniggers and says, “Sorry, sir.”

“I’m moving your quarters, Reza, to the room behind the med bay. Since, you are frequently in the med bay, Joker; I’m okay with you bunking with your wife. Just, be discrete, please. If anyone suspects and isn’t in confidence, I’m afraid I’m going to have to kick you both out, and you will hot bunk with the rest of the crew in the sleeper pods. Got it?”

They look at each other surprised that they are getting permission to bunk together and they both say, “Roger that.” 

Joker nods at his CO, “We’ll be careful.”

“Now since we have an early morning departure, which I expect will need our pilot to initiate, you better go get settled in your quarters.” David looks at their surprised faces and coughs delicately, “Uh, try to get at least a few hours of sleep. Just a suggestion…” When Reza looks up at him startled and Joker reddens, “What, you think that since I’m your CO, I’m going to keep you separated after four months? I’m not heartless and you ‘are’ my favorite kids.” Joker laughs and Reza grins at him as he just confirmed that he does play favorites with them. He rolls his eyes. “Go. Get out of here, quickly before third watch starts. Your room is ready and your stuff has been moved from the old XO’s cabin, Reza, and yours too Joker, from the officer’s quarters."

“Yes, Sir,” they both say and Rez puts her shoes back on as she waits for Joker to stand and situate with his crutches. 

“After you, Ma’am,” Joker says waving in front of him.

Reza stands and waits for him at the door, “You just want to enjoy the view.”

“You can bet your sweet ass.”

Reza giggles.

David huffs loudly and says trying not to guffaw at their antics, “Get out of here, you two, before I change my mind.”

They make haste, out of their CO’s cabin and walk across the mess hall over to the med bay, no one being the wiser. 

Once entering the med bay, however, they do come across the doctor as she is still putting away supplies that had been stored in boxes in the back room. 

Reza beams, “Doctor Chakwas, it is so good to see you!”

“Ah, Rezana…Jeff. How are the two of you doing?” She says after hugging the both of them. “David told me the situation and I just wanted you to know that your room is ready. A double bed was brought up from storage and the bathroom has been converted into a small standing unit, complete with toilet, sink, and shower, should you want some privacy. Both of your biometrics has also been programmed into the door mechanism, so no one can surprise you without your consent, especially when you are…indisposed,” she says winking at the two of them.

“Karin! I’m shocked,” Reza says teasing the woman she has known her whole life, since the doctor has served with both her father and mother on their ships as CMO. The Doc also knew Joker and was familiar with his medical condition. 

“Uh huh, anyway, I’ll be done soon, so keep it down until I leave, if possible.” She chuckles at their expense when both Reza and Joker turn red at the insinuation. 

At the door to their cabin, Karin hugs both of them again and says, “Come see me tomorrow for your requisite physicals, yes? Otherwise, it is so good to see the both of you. Sleep well…” she says winking as she walks away leaving them both agape at her once more.

Joker is the first to snap out of it and says to his wife, “Our humble abode awaits, my love,” and waves his arm inside allowing Reza to precede him. Just as she passes him, he swats her ass making her squeal before turning around to glare at him. He laughs and walks in to their cabin letting the door shut and lock behind them. 

{{{}}}

After looking around their small but efficient room, she sneaks a peak at her husband and notices something she didn’t notice earlier, when all she wanted was to be in his arms again. “Where’s your hat?”

“Just now noticed that did you? That’s very observant of a Lieutenant Commander, War hero, and super soldier extraordinaire.”

“Harhar. I’m not used to seeing your pretty head without it.”

“I took it off before coming to see you in the CO’s cabin. I knew you were going to take it off and play with it, so I thought it might be better to drop it off with my stuff, before you got your grubby little hands on it. Plus, I didn’t want to lose it, should it fall off, and ‘someone’ forgets to retrieve it, before leaving the CO’s cabin.” 

Reza places her hand on her chest and in a forlorn faux hurt voice, “That only happened one time. Also, glad that you were thinking more about your precious hat and not about your long lost wife.”

“Your welcome.”

“Besides, I may take it off of you from time to time, but I always give it back. Why would I do that, do you think?”

Joker shrugs.

“Cause I think my husband looks sexy wearing a hat. But, if you insist that you care more for your hat’s protection, then you leave me no choice. I’ll just declare that while on board, no one is allowed to wear hats while on duty, no exceptions.”

“Ouch. You wound me.”

This time Reza shrugs.

Joker walks over to his wife and takes one of her hands in his, bringing it up to kiss the back of it, “Actually, I just wanted to make it easier to kiss my absentia wife. Nothing is more important than that.”

Reza gifts him with a beautiful smile, “You’re forgiven.”

“Have I ever told you how absolutely beautiful you are, my love?”

Reza beams at him, “Not today.”

Joker wraps one of his arms around her waist bringing her body against his, “Well you are.” He looks her up and down again, “Can you wear this dress again? I might like to take it off you again in the future,” he says leering at her. 

“Oh that reminds me, I want to take a shower, before we start anything.”

Joker kisses her and steps back to crutch over to the made double bed and slowly declines upon the end of it, leaning his crutches on the wall next to him. He says mockingly, “Rejected by the lure of a hot shower, once again. I feel so dejected.”

“Come one, babe. Only two minutes. I want to wash the stench of that creepy Turian off of me first.”

“Nihlus?”

“No! Not Nihlus…” Reza says frowning at her clearly jealous husband. We’ll have to cover Nihlus later. “The creepy scumbag I’m talking about was from my mission.” And simply says, “The target,” as if that explains everything.

Joker nods understanding her meaning, “The dead target.”

“Uh, yeah, you are speaking to ‘me.’”

“Right. You let him touch you? Should I be jealous?”

“No babe. It was all part of the charade. Don’t worry, he didn’t get very far. You know I would never let anyone else touch me the way you do.” 

“Speaking of which, I’m timing you…two minutes.”

Reza smiles and walks over to her duffle and starts removing several knives hidden within her arm sheaths and then pulls them off. Then after noting that Joker has gotten up to rummage in his own duffle, she crosses her arms and takes the bottom hem of her dress and raises it above her head and off, leaving her in high heels, a thigh holster, a necklace, and a G-string.

Two crutches tumble to the floor and a noise of rustling as Joker stumbles to sit back onto the end of the bed, make her turn around and look at him. “Oh Gods, you’re going to kill me,” he says as he stares at her, taking in her unclothed state.

Reza grins at her gaping husband and leans into one hip and crosses her arms over her chest, knowing full well that her cleavage is now on display. “Like something you see, Flight Lieutenant?”

Joker rubs a hand over his face and peeks at her through his fingers. He waves at all of her and stammers, “Th…that’s entirely unfair. I can’t wait for you for two minutes. Not after four mouths. You now have one minute.” Just as she salutes him mockingly, he says, “Wait, a N7 G-string? Really Rez? Not that I’m complaining, but when did the Alliance make N7 briefs?”

“Make up your mind, love. Either I take my shower or explain the N7 apparel,” Reza says smirking at him as she unsnaps her thigh holster and checks to make sure her Carnifex’s safety is on before setting it aside on the makeshift table/dresser next to her duffle. 

“I’m not sure ‘that’ is apparel. But, I like it,” and then groans and shifts uncomfortably as she bends over to slip her shoes off. “Do you like torturing your husband?”

Reza straightens after taking off her shoes and unhooks the necklace he gave her on their first anniversary and smiles at him innocently, “I don’t know what you mean, Mr. Moreau.”

Joker leans back on his hands and looks at his wife who is only dressed in a smile and the non-apparel N7 briefs. “I think the minute is up. You lose, Mrs. Moreau.”

“Oh? I don’t think so. Take off your clothes, Lt.”

Joker quirks an eyebrow and smirks, knowing he just threw out a challenge. “Aye-aye, Ma’am.” He grabs his crutches where they had landed and pushes them under the bed, out of the way. Then he stands up and within moments he is naked and standing at attention, more ways than one. “See, easy. Only took me a couple of seconds to obey you,” he says as he salutes her.

Reza snorts and says, “Only because you go commando.”

“Always want to be ready at a moment’s notice, Commander.”

Reza laughs and says, “Noted.” Then unable to help herself she admires the naked man in front of her, like a starving woman who just got her first drink of water in over four months. “Mmmhmm,” she says admiring him suddenly extremely aroused and dripping wet. Joker may have glass bones in his legs, but that doesn’t stop him from working out. Above the waist he is all defined muscles; biceps, pecs, defined abs, and the smidgeon of hair on his chest, which she loves to run her fingers through, just reminds her that he is a real man who treats her like a woman and not a ‘hero.’ Beyond that, he loves her and is apparently very happy to see her. She bites her bottom lip as her eyes seek out the part of him that has been neglected for so long. What he may lack in physicality because of his condition, he definitely makes up for in masculinity. He is definitely what a woman would call ‘well endowed.’ She licks her lips as she looks him up and down. Fuck the shower. She can’t wait to taste him. She smirks at him, “Sit back down and lean back against the pillows, Lt.”

Joker does exactly as she requests and positions himself on the bed so he’s leaning against the headboard sitting up with pillows bunched behind to give him the best comfort. Waiting until he’s comfortable, Reza turns around and slowly slides her briefs off; looking behind her at him making sure he’s watching her. He groans and starts to stroke himself. She turns around and walks over to the end of the bed, “Nah ah,” she says waving her finger back and forth. Getting on all fours; she crawls up his body and parks herself between his legs, using hers to hold herself up so she can lean into him to kiss him. 

Joker cradles her face in his hands after they break off their kiss. “I love you so much, babe.”

“I love you, too.”

“I thought you were going to take a shower.”

“I will. But, I wanted to make you comfortable first,” she says wickedly.

Joker raises an eyebrow and says, “Oh?”

She scooches herself down and immediately takes his cock into her hands and while looking at him, she lowers her mouth upon him and laves her tongue around the tip, slightly sucking him inside her mouth, hollowing out her cheeks. He groans and shakes with his arousal. He grabs the sheet on one side of him and his other hand grabs a hold of her bun and starts guiding her mouth up and down taking him inside her hot mouth. He only stops when he hits the back of her throat. He doesn’t know how she does that, without setting off her gagging reflex, but, OH GODS. Nevermind! She hasn’t stopped her ministrations on his cock as he was contemplating whatever he was thinking about. Thinking…what? He doesn’t fucking care. Nothing is more important than what she is doing to him right now. He moans louder when she runs her thumbnail along the sensitive vein on the underside of his cock just enough stimulation to set him gasping. He sucks in much needed air when she slides one of her hands down to cup his balls and then gently pulls on them, making him shudder in response. “Babe, I’m going to come.”

“Mmm,” Reza moans around the glorious cock in her mouth, not bothering to stop what she is doing, so he is left bereft of the intense feeling coming over him. She is encouraged, by his ongoing moans of her name, to continue to bob her head up and down matching her strokes of her hand on his shaft, stimulating as much of him as possible, root to tip. 

Joker tenses and with a loud “Ahhhhh,” he comes in her mouth and she swallows every last bit of him, savoring the taste again after so long. 

As he relaxes around her, she kisses the tip of his slowly deflating cock and sits up, wiping her mouth with one hand and licking the rest of him from her fingers. 

Joker opens his eyes and looks lovingly at his wife and says huskily, “Gawd, watching you lick your fingers, is getting me horny again. Come here.”

Reza shakes her head and crawls off the bed and stands up. “I need that shower, babe. When I’m done, be ready, because I don’t think I’ll be able to wait another second without feeling you inside of me.”

Joker eyes alight with want, “Hurry.”

{{{}}}

Three minutes later, Reza is standing in front of her husband, clad only in a fluffy white towel. 

“Take your hair down.”

“Yes sir,” she says as she unbinds her hair from the bun and lets it fall about her shoulders to midway down her back in spirals.

Joker gasps at the sight in front of him. He absolutely loves her hair. He fidgets a little, “Babe, I can’t wait any longer, come here.”

Reza unwinds the towel from around her making him moan at the sight of her again and leaves it where it drops to the floor and walks over to the end of the bed. She crawls back over him in the middle of the bed and straddles his lap. Using her strong legs again, she starts to grind against his fully aching cock and grabs the headboard on either side of his head. He kisses her and as one hand rakes through her hair, he turns her head to the side to kiss her neck making her moan. He nibbles his way down to her breasts and as one hand teases one nipple, he sucks on the other making her gasp and moan. 

“I want you. Please, please, please…”

Joker stops her grinding on him and positions himself at her entrance. They look into each other’s eyes as he breaches her and sinks slowly into her until he hilts, making them both moan in unison at the pleasure of being one again after so long. “Oh Gods, Rez, I can never get enough of you.”

Reza smiles at the love of her life and says, “We have all night.”

She starts to move, using her legs to lift above him and then uses her core to grind him inside of her. He grabs her ass and helps her grind down onto him again and again. He buries his head into her breasts and sucks on her nipples, giving her that little bit of pain when he nips her with his teeth, making her cry out and grind harder and faster. 

Reza lifts his head with a hand and kisses him, slowing down her movements to stare into his eyes and says breathlessly, “I love you.” They kiss, tangling their tongues together and gasp as she rolls her hips to find that angle inside of her that brushes against her G-spot making her buck against him again and again. She bites on lower lip and exclaims, “Oh Jeff, oh, please, please, please,” as she starts to feel her orgasm build within her. 

“Come for me, babe,” Joker says, using his hands to grip her ass over him as he meets her thrust for thrust.

“Ahhhh!” Reza breathes against his lips trying to tamp down the scream she so desperately wants to let out at the amount of pleasure she feels at having him inside her after so long and glows blue with her release. Her biotics pulse into her husband, overwhelming him with intense pleasure making him come with a loud grunt and groan as Reza comes a second time making him see stars as her inner walls milk his seed from him. 

As she comes down off of her high, she gently leans into his chest briefly to savor the feeling of him still inside of her. After a few minutes of laying her head on his shoulder and listening to both of their heartbeats start to calm down, she sits up and leans her forehead against his. They stare at each other and smile. Joker strokes her cheek with one hand while the other plays with her hair. He smiles, “That was vigorous.”

Reza kisses him and smiles. Feeling him start to soften, she shakily lifts herself off of his lap, so he can separate himself from her and he shifts positions to lie on his side to face her. She does the same so she can look into his eyes. 

“Hey, babe, you okay?” Joker says as he wipes a tear from her cheek.

“I just missed you so much, my love.”

“Ditto.”

Reza runs her hand over his bearded face, loving the feel of his whiskers against her hand. She smiles and leans in to kiss him briefly, “I just hate being away from you, even for a short time. It hurts. My heart hurts when I can’t see you every day.”

Joker leans in and kisses his wife and pulls her into him so they can wrap around each other. He just wants to feel her body next to his, as close as they can be. Sure, the sex is amazing. Hell, it’s unbe-fucking-lievable, but this intimacy stuff, he loves it. “Let’s take advantage of our tour together. Let’s never waste a minute that we can be together. My heart hurts too, when you are not around.”

Reza kisses him again, something she never can stop doing, and then rubs her cheek against his soft beard, “How do you do it?”

“How do I do what?”

“How do you let me go on my missions, that take me away from you? Why do you put up with me?”

Joker chuckles, “Because I have no choice. It is who you are. You are a fierce warrior that needs to right the wrongs of the galaxy and I’m just glad that you have picked me to ride shotgun through this adventure you call a life. Plus, the sex is pretty good.”

“Just pretty good, huh?”

“Eh, it’ll do.”

“Excuse me? I didn’t hear you complaining just a bit a go.”

“Turn around, babe. Spoon with me and I’ll show you what a pretty good time feels like.”

“Ok,” Reza says smiling. She nips his chin and scooches out of his arms so she can turn around. After grabbing the towel from the floor, she cleans herself briefly before returning to lie back to front with her husband. He stations one arm under her head and wraps his other arm around her waist. He leans into her and brushes her hair away from her neck and nuzzles her, making her gasp. In retaliation, she arches her back, which juts her breasts into Joker’s hand and rubs her ass against his hardening cock. 

He starts showing her what a pretty good time feels like by kneading her breasts and flicking her nipples while he sucks on her earlobe, making her groan. Reza moves her head a bit to replace her ear with her lips and kisses her husband with every ounce of passion she has for him. As she gets distracted with one of favorite pastimes, kissing her husband, he slips one of his hands from her breast down her defined abs and ends up down at her core still dripping with their juices. He spreads her legs and positions his aching cock at her entrance and pushes himself inside her taking advantage of her wet depths. They groan together as he seats himself inside her once again. As he starts to thrust into her, he continues to kiss and nip at her lips, flick and pinch her nipples, and plays with her clit, as he pumps inside of her. He whispers huskily into her ear making her shiver, “Pretty good?”

Matching him for every grind of his hips, she whimpers her assent, not being able to string any coherent thoughts together to respond vocally. 

“Not bad at multi-tasking, am I?”

She shakes her head and moans into her hand trying to keep her breathy gasps, moans, and groans, from getting too loud. Finally able to talk, she says, “You have amazing hands. I get hot just from watching you pilot.”

Joker starts thrusting into his wife faster, rotating his hips so he can hit every nerve bundle inside of her, making her gasp and call out his name. “I’m close. Come for me, babe. Come all over me, as I fuck you. Let me feel your silky walls milk my seed from me. Oh baby, come for me. Gods, you feel so good,” he whispers into her ear as he doubles his efforts on helping her move against him and using two fingers on her clit, just the way she likes it. 

Holy hell, she loves it when he talks dirty to her. She bites down on her hand and with all the stimulation on her neck as he kisses her, her breasts, and her clit, she can’t hold out any longer and lets out a loud gasp and whimper, before she shudders against her husband as another release hits her, triggering her biotics again. She comes again two more times, consecutively, making her see stars, just as her husband grunts and groans his own release as he comes inside of her. 

They collapse into each other after coming down from their highs. Joker slides out of her, making her whimper at the loss of him inside her, so he can reposition them to lie face to face again. “Oh, holy hellfire, babe, tell me that was pretty good.”

“I think it was damn good.”

“But not great.”

“Well, great is another matter,” Reza giggles and kisses him. “But, we will have to wait a few minutes to see where great takes us.” 

Joker chuckles and pulls her into him to wrap his arms around her. He grins, knowing where Reza’s thoughts are. Hell, they have all night to see where ‘great’ takes them. 

Throughout the rest of the night they would intermittently doze in each other’s arms and then wake when their passion would ignite again. They were able to experience; great, fucking great, amazing, absolutely fucking amazing, to finally unbe-fucking-lievable, before being satisfied enough to go to sleep. That was only because Joker finally had to make a case to his insatiable wife, that since pilots were known to, I don’t know, uh, pilot…he needed his beauty rest to do his job. And, only when he promised her another round of one-upping each other the next night, did she finally relent, especially not knowing exactly what the next day may bring for them both. So, Reza finally agrees to her husband’s terms and allows him to get his much needed rest. They both had a work out and within seconds of her agreeing with him, they fall asleep in contentment, wrapped in each other’s arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: CMO: Chief Medical Officer
> 
> A/N 2: Hope you liked it...I need a cold shower. 
> 
> By the way, it might seem easy to write the uh...sexy times between my characters, however, for me it is a challenge. The humor is the easy stuff, not the sex. I hope I didn't finangle it too much. Let me know what you thought, comments are always welcome. 
> 
> Also, thanks for all the kudos so far.


	4. Duty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I find it hard to believe that Shepard, a seasoned Marine, would be dropped into a HOT zone like Eden Prime without at least testing her squad mates out first. So, with that in mind, I thought the Major Kyle & X57 missions could be done off of her reputation as a badass marine before she became a Spectre. Thus, the next several chapters will cover these missions. First, this chapter explores more Joker/Reza smartass dialogue... :P

The next morning, promptly at 0600, Reza is standing next to the coffee maker waiting for it to steep with a slight smile on her face as she daydreams about her husband and their antics the previous evening and that morning; 

{{{{About an hour earlier, her husband had awakened as usual, like clockwork around o’ dark thirty, taken a shower and situated his leg braces, before lying down next to her fully clothed to pull her into him to kiss her awake. “Babe, I have to go. I wish I could lie here with you all day, but duty calls.” 

“Mmmphff…don’t go,” she croaks with her face buried in his neck. He smells delicious. She licks him, yep, he tastes delicious, too. 

“Ewww, now I have Reza cooties,” Joker says as he grins at his disheveled wife. A night of loving does that to you. She looks absolutely beautiful. 

“Jackass.”

“Just for that…rise and shine! It's time to start Commandering!” He extricates himself from her arms making her groan and with a cheeky smirk; he grabs the sheets surrounding her and pulls them off making her squeak in surprise. His laughter is cut short with a groan as he watches her stretch in front of him, jutting her breasts out, her nipples beckoning to him. He turns around and wills his libido to stop twitching. That’s all he needs, showing up for duty with a hard on. 

“Minx.”

Reza giggles at his discomfort, knowing exactly what she was doing to him. “Just had to leave you something to remember me by and look forward to later.”

“Trust me; I have enough fodder after last night and this morning, to last me for days,” he says still turned away from her.

“Joker,” she says from behind him.

“Hmm?” He turns towards her voice, pausing to groan as he is met by a still very naked wife, and grabs her waist as she takes advantage and drapes herself over him, rubbing her naked body over his semi-erection. “Are you trying to kill me?”

She laughs and gives him a hug and a kiss, before stepping back from him and bending over next to the bed to grab his crutches from underneath. Before straightening she rubs her ass against him and he moans. “Reeezzz…” he wheezes and slaps a hand over his eyes to try to hide the sight of her bent over and tries desperately to distract himself with non-sexy thoughts. He slits his fingers to peak out and lets out a husky sigh, “Oh Gods.”

She straightens and hands him his crutches. She gives him an impish grin and walks over to the temporary shower unit and grabs a towel and wraps it around her. She walks back over to him and wraps her arms around his neck as he adjusts his crutches in front of him to try to hide his now full erection, with no success, making him grumble. She exclaims, “Last night was amazing, babe. Do you think maybe we can have another round tonight? I still haven’t had my fill of you, yet. Four months is a long time...”

Joker looks at his wife, finally succeeding in distracting himself enough for his libido to start to wane and takes a spare lock of her hair in front of her face to wrap it behind her ear, “I think that I’ll do my best to oblige you, Ma’am.” He leans in to kiss her nose. She is so beautiful with her bedhead and slightly swollen lips. They stand briefly holding each other, basking in their shared love, at peace. 

Giving him one last kiss, Reza releases him and walks over to the shower to turn on the water. She turns around to drop the towel from around her, making him gasp. Then just to torture him further for waking her so abruptly earlier, she sucks in a finger and slowly withdraws it and runs it down her neck, over a pert nipple, and then stops the downward descent at her clit, where she encircles it and starts to pleasure herself, drawing a deep groan from her suddenly very distracted husband. She leans back against the bathroom wall and looks at him while she picks up the tempo in pleasuring herself. Being sensitive already from their night of loving, she doesn’t need to stimulate herself for long. Plus, the hot look she is getting from her statue of a husband who is watching everything she is doing, helps her focus on the task of torturing him before he has to leave to report for duty. Thinking how much he’ll ache for her all day, her orgasm grips her fiercely and she gasps and moans his name. After recovering from her high, she lifts her fingers and licks off her juices while smirking at him. 

Starring at her he whimpers his own need as he revisits the image of her pleasuring herself over and over. With a strained face, he leans on his crutches and grimaces on how uncomfortable he has become specifically in his uniform trousers. 

She smirks knowing exactly the pain he is going through. She raises an eyebrow at him and says, “That is how you awaken your wife after four months.” Winking at him, she adds, “See you later, Flight Lieutenant,” and disappears into the steamy depths of the shower. Before shutting the slim door of the makeshift shower, she hears Joker say, “Oh fucking hell, Rezana. That image is going to burn through my head all day.” She laughs into the spray when she hears him say, “Fuck! You are going to pay for that later.” 

She opens the door to the shower and grins at him, “Yes, sir. I always pay my debts.”

“That you do. Ugh.” He groans and looks down at himself; hard and aching. “Oh Gods…,” he moans, there wasn’t much he could do about it now. He needed to leave to report for duty or he’ll be late. Giving her one more pointed glare, he readjusts himself and shuffles off. 

The last glimpse she has of her husband was him crutching awkwardly towards the door, grab his hat, and leave all the while groaning and mumbling that he was damn lucky that the med bay was poorly lit, cause he was going to report to duty with a raging hard on.}}}} 

She chuckles to herself, remembering her antics towards her husband; she is startled suddenly when Lt. Alenko joins her at the coffee maker. She blinks and the latent musings on her husband’s discomfort drifts away as she acknowledges the Lt. 

Having a little time before her coffee addiction interceded, she had reviewed Kaidan’s personnel file, since she was curious about her head of marine detail and the rest of the ground team assigned to her. Alenko had a very impressive career so far. He was listed as an ‘L2’ biotic, trained as a Sentinel. Knowing about the stigma behind the ‘L2’ implant she was curious how his biotic talents stacked up against hers. As an ‘L3n’ biotic, she was listed in the Alliance as one of the highest ranked, as far as power produced, that is. He wasn’t as highly ranked, but for Sentinels, it wasn’t necessarily the power produced, but the longevity of the maneuvers made, instead. As far as control, it seemed he had that in the bag. Hers could use some fine-tuning, so it seemed they could learn from each other. Beyond her Vanguard training, she also doubly trained as an infiltrator, just so she could use a sniper rifle. Knowing that adding additional skills to your resume was a good idea, and Kaidan being a career man, she is hopeful that she will be able to convince him to broaden his horizons. He was also listed as a field medic and passable pilot, nowhere near the skill of her husband, of course, but sufficient for a co-pilot. Regarding the ‘L2’ issue, she had already talked with Doctor Chakwas about the possible complications of his implant, and she was happy to learn that he was one of the lucky ones. Not that having migraines was lucky, but after working in the past with other ‘L2s,’ she was glad that she didn’t have to walk on eggshells around him. Now to test his skills, that’s what she was looking forward to. As her head of marine detail, she knew that he would be leading a training session later this morning with the marines assigned to him. Maybe they could consolidate the two; biotic and combat training, for the whole ground team. With that decision made, she smiles at him. 

He smiles back at her and looks her up and down. Uh oh. She grimaces and waits for him to focus on her again. She has seen that look before in the Lt’s eyes. The look he is giving her as he checks her out is the same one she has been dealing with since her teenage years from males, females, and a few Asari. Thank the Gods she is married and only has to deal with Joker’s stubborn cheekiness, which honestly is what drew her to him. Shaking off thoughts of her husband, she coughs trying to get the Lt’s attention. Obviously, she will have to deal with his interest in her eventually. Today was not the day. Maybe, if they build a good working relationship, then she could possibly bring him into her confidence. Having a squad mate she can trust wholeheartedly would be a great advantage. Plus, Joker would be able to breathe freely around his friend and not get jealous, or not much anyway. As he reminded her the previous evening, he was a jealous bastard. 

“Good morning, Ma’am,” Kaidan says smiling and saluting her, pulling her out of her musings.

She waves off his salute, “Good morning, Lt. By the way, unless a superior officer is around, you don’t need to salute me every time we are in proximity of each other. I know it’s not the norm but since we will be closely working together, it’s friendlier when we aren’t so formal all the time.” She yawns and blushes putting her hand over her mouth, “Plus, we aren’t even on duty yet.”

Kaidan laughs at her yawn and nods, “Understood. I feel the same way.”

“Good.” Noticing that the coffee is now ready, she pulls out two mugs and fills both, adding sugar to one and milk to the other. 

“Two coffees, Ma’am?” Kaidan asks as he watches her prepare both. 

“Oh, I thought I would take one to Joker. I may as well start getting on his good side. Don’t want him to leave me stranded planet side, if he’s pissed at me.” 

Kaidan chuckles, knowing his grumpy friend would do exactly that, “Good idea.”

Before grabbing the coffees and taking them up to the cockpit, she says looking at Kaidan, “Let’s meet in the cargo bay later and run a few drills. I want to see if we are compatible as squad mates. Bring Corporal Jenkins, as well.”

“Roger that.”

She nods at him and grabs the coffees and sets off for the bridge, leaving a hopeful Lt behind her. 

Receiving any training from the legendary ‘Commander Shepard’ was exhilarating enough, but spending time with her personally, even during skill drills, was any man’s dream come true. Kaidan fills his own mug with the bitter tasting brew and reflects on the fact that his XO is not only easy on the eyes but easy to talk to. When she blushed after yawning in his face, his heart flip-flopped in his chest. It was the cutest thing he’s ever seen and it reminded him that she may be a ‘hero,’ but Rezana Shepard was also just a woman; an extremely sexy and gorgeous woman. That dress she had on when she boarded the previous evening haunted his dreams throughout the night and he had to take a cold shower this morning. He frowns, as his XO, she technically is off limits, and being a by-the-book Alliance officer he would normally not pursue any type of personal relationship, but if she’s open to it… Hmm…he’ll have to think about it further. Frat regs were there for a reason. More on these thoughts later, he needs to grab some breakfast before reporting to the cockpit for duty. Either way this morning is shaping up to be the start of an interesting day. 

{{{}}} 

Reza pauses at the entrance to the bridge and chuckles as she hears her husband give his ‘I’m an egomaniac’ speech to the head navigator, Lt. Pressly.

“You want me as your pilot. I’m not good. I’m not even great. I’m the best helmsman in the Alliance fleet. Top of my class in flight school, I earned that. All those accommodations in my file, I earned every single one. Those weren’t given to me as charity for my disease.”

“I’m sorry, Flight Lieutenant, I didn’t mean to insult you.” Pressly says with his hands up backing away.

“You mean…you mean you didn’t know. Aww, crap. Okay, I’ve got Vrolick’s Syndrome. Brittle bone disease? The bones in my legs never developed properly, they are basically hollow, and too much force and they’ll shatter. Even with crutches and my leg braces, it is still hard to get around. One wrong step and CRACK, it’s very dramatic. I’ve learned to manage my condition. Put the Normandy in my hands and I’ll make her dance for you, just don’t ask me to get up and dance, you know, unless you like the sound of snapping shin bones.”

“Understood, Flight Lieutenant, I was only trying to get to know the personnel I will be working with.” Pressly says and before he walks away, he adds, “You may want to chuck the attitude when talking to your superior officers, though. It could get you in trouble someday.”

Joker scoffs, “Was that a threat?”

Pressly turns red and is about to respond, when Reza intercedes. “Is there a problem here, gentlemen?”

Pressly immediately turns towards her and stands at attention saluting her, “Ma’am!”

She holds out her mugged hands and nods at him. “Lieutenant Pressly, I presume?”

“Yes, Ma’am,” lowering his hand, “I was only reminding the Lt. that…”

“I heard what you said. I’ll take care of it. As you were,” she says dismissing him. 

“Ma’am,” he says and salutes her before departing the bridge and returning to his console.

Reza watches him depart and then turns back towards Joker. He was eyeing the gifts that she brought with her and licking his lips in anticipation. He was also addicted to coffee. She hands him his mug, the version with sugar. 

He snatches it and immediately swallows a gulp, moaning, “Thanks, babe.”

She nods and looks back at Pressly, “Making friends already?”

Joker huffs, “He’s a pompous old windbag…getting to know his coworkers, my ass. He couldn’t stop looking at my crutches and leg braces earlier when I reported for duty.”

“Be that as it may, please try to get along with him. He’s also good at his job. Everyone assigned to the Normandy is damn good at what they do. Captain Anderson had free reign to pick the best of the best for his crew. Obviously, no one is as good as the best helmsman in the galaxy,” she winks at him, making him snicker, “But he still deserves respect, so be nice.” Joker groans and finally nods. “However, as the OIC of navigation, he is technically ranked the same as you as chief pilot, so, if he tries to order you around, let me know.”

“Roger that.”

She looks back at the personnel at their stations and notes that none of them are interested in their conversation. She leans against the partition separating his workstation from the co-pilots chairs and settles in for a chat. “Have we been cleared for departure yet?”

“Yes, Ma’am. We are ready and waiting. I only need a destination.”

“Once I meet up with the Captain, I’ll let you know.”

“Understood…” Joker pauses in checking the stats on his display and looks up at his wife leaning against his chair, sipping her coffee. Lowering his voice, he says, “By the way, that was probably one of the most uncomfortable walks, I have ever had to do, in my life.”

Reza looks down fondly at him and taps the brim of his hat skewing it on his head and smirks, “Your welcome.”

Joker frowns at her and straightens the hat over his face again, “I mean it Rez, you are so gonna get it tonight.”

“I hope so. Many times.”

“Wait…that wasn’t what I meant and you know it.”

“MmmHmm.”

Joker chuckles, “Fine. You still owe me, though.”

Reza leans into his ear as he looks back at his haptic display as a button starts to flash, and says, “Once we have some shore leave, I’ll make it up to you right here in your chair.”

Before hitting the button to check the incoming call on his comm device, he leers at her, “Deal.” 

After waiting a few minutes listening to the incoming message, he straightens and says, “Commander, you have an incoming message from Admiral Hackett. Would you like to take it in the communications room?”

“Yes. Let Captain Anderson and Nihlus know. Have them meet me there.”

“Roger that.”

“See you later, Flight Lieutenant.”

“Say hi to the father in law for me. I’m sure it will make his day.”

Reza groans and hops off the partition and before leaving she brushes her fingers slightly along his bearded cheek and then flicks his nose, surprising him. 

“Hey!”

She chuckles and leaves the cockpit. Duty calls…literally.

{{{}}}

Walking into the comm room, she sees that Nihlus and the Captain are already talking quietly and look up when she walks in. 

David waves off Reza’s salute and smiles at his glowing XO, “Good morning, Commander.”

“Captain…Nihlus,” she says nodding at the two of them. 

“Commander,” Nihlus says in return.

“We are ready to depart as soon as we have a destination, Captain.”

“Good. Maybe that is what this incoming call is about,” David says turning towards the vid screen. Tapping his internal comm device, he says, “Joker, go ahead and transfer the call.”

Suddenly an image of her father comes over the vid screen. Both she and the Captain come to attention and salute.

Admiral Hackett salutes and says, “Good morning, Captain…Commander…Nihlus. Is the Normandy ready to depart?”

David responds, “Yes sir.”

“Excellent. Something has come up. We have a mission for you, Commander. Major Kyle, your commanding officer at Torfan, has set up a small compound in the Hawking Eta cluster. He’s attracted a number of biotic followers. He’s become an outspoken critic of the Alliance, and we believe he’s mentally unstable. This could be trouble, Shepard.”

“What kind of proof do you have that the Major is dangerous?”

“Three day ago, we sent two Alliance representatives, to meet with him at his compound. They have disappeared. We believe Kyle and his followers killed them. That compound is a cult, Shepard. They call him ‘Father Kyle’ now. He’s set himself up as some kind of religious leader.”

“How permanent of a solution are you looking for?”

“We don’t want this to turn into a massacre, Commander. Kyle is dangerous. I trust you to use your judgment.”

“Understood, Admiral.” 

“May your mission be successful,” Steven says saluting again after both David and Reza come to attention and salute. “Commander, a word…”

David and Nihlus nod and before departure, David adds, “Commander, come and see me after.”

Reza nods and watches them leave before she turns back towards the vid screen. She stands at attention waiting to see what the Admiral wants. 

{{{}}}

“At ease, Commander.”

She relaxes and waits.

“How are you kid?” Steven says, dropping his ‘Admiral’ persona for the interim, while he talks to his beloved daughter, “I haven’t seen you for several months. Your mother has been asking about you.”

“How is she?”

“She is well. Currently, her ship is out in the Traverse on a classified mission. I spoke to her last week.”

“How are you, Dad? I’m sorry I didn’t have time to see you personally before reporting to the Normandy.”

“I am well. I miss you, kid. However, David let me know that you were wrapping up your last assignment and wouldn’t have time to visit. He also transmitted a copy of your report. Good work, by the way.”

“Thank you, sir.”

Steven smiled, “He also informed me about the spectacle you caused upon your arrival.”

“Oh?”

“Let’s just say, you sure know how to get tongues wagging. I’m just glad that I don’t have to deal with the aftermath anymore.”

She rolls her eyes and grimaces, “Not that I had much choice.”

“Either way, I’m glad that you were able to successfully take that bastard out without getting hurt in the process. I know that you can take care of yourself, Rez, but I’m your father. I worry.”

She nods in acknowledgement and then grins at him. She’s already resigned to the fact that he may be her superior officer, but first and foremost, he is her father. 

“I also observed from your report that you and Nihlus are working better together. I wasn’t sure you were going to be able to work out your differences.”

Reza laughs, remembering that the first couple of missions were a little stressed until they learned how to work compatibly with each other. “Yeah, we are chummier, now.”

Steven smirks and says, “How does Jeff feel about your relationship with Nihlus?”

Reza looks down and shuffles her feet, “Uh, I haven’t really had time to talk to him yet.”

“Rezana…you know how he gets. Don’t let things stew too long. Just a little advice from an old married man…”

“Roger that. Wait, what are you talking about?” 

“You remember my old Alliance buddy, Zaeed?”

“Yeah, I remember him. You hate the guy. When he came to my N7 graduation, you wouldn’t even let him stay for the dinner afterward…although he did. He snuck back in after your back was turned.”

“Wait…what?”

“Never mind, Dad…Let’s just say that his intentions were obvious and I called him on his bullshit and we parted as friends.”

“Merc bastard!”

“I understand where you are going with your advice, but this is different. Zaeed was an old friend of Mom’s and in the end you got her anyway. Nihlus and I, we work together. That’s it.”

“My dear, you may work together, true. But, although you are married, a lot of guys will still try to be with you. You are a beautiful, tough, badass marine, who doesn’t realize just how alluring you are to those that like that in a female. Nihlus has a reputation; Human, Turian, Asari, married, doesn’t matter. Just watch what you say around Jeff.”

Reza had reddened at the compliments, even from her father. “It is true that Nihlus originally thought I may be interested, but trust me, I have disillusioned him of that notion.”

Steven chuckled, imagining just what the ‘disillusioning’ may have comprised of. “Was he able to walk away from that, or did he spend a little time in the med bay afterward.”

Reza turns her head away, reddening further. Damn it! Her father knows her too well. “A little medi-gel was needed, yes.”

Steven chuckles again, “That’s my girl.”

Reza smiles in return. “Anyway, I’ll talk to him. Right now we are just catching up from being a part for so long. Thanks by the way, for allowing us to stay on this tour together. I appreciate it.”

“Anything for my girl…” Steven smiles at his daughter. He knows how hard it is to serve in the Alliance and be married, especially when your spouse is also serving. Plus, all the extra missions his Reza has been doing lately with Nihlus, to become a Spectre, she’s earned a little extra time with Jeff. Who knows what will happen once she is given the promotion. They might not have very much face time in the near future. What are a few weeks?

“Dad…I hope you won’t get into trouble by approving this.”

“Don’t worry about me. Although, originally, we didn’t plan on you both serving on the Normandy, your husband made sure of it when he stole it to prove a point. I’m sure you know what I’m talking about,” he says grimacing. 

“Yes. I’m aware. David told me. Or rather, I guessed, when he hedged on me the reason for Joker’s attendance.”

Steven sighs and rubs a hand over his face…”That husband of yours…”

“He says ‘hi’ by the way…”

Steven scoffs and rolls his eyes.

“Come off it, Dad. You love him. He’s your son-in-law…and he makes me very, very happy.”

“I know.”

“Dad, I better go. Gotta get back to work. Give Mom my best and I’ll contact you both, soon.”

Steven nods at his daughter, “Love you, kiddo…Jeff too.”

Reza smiles and waves as her father waves in return and clicks off the vid. She sighs. It would have been nice to see her father in person, since it had been months and months, but there just wasn’t enough time. Even though she took her mother’s maiden name as hers when she joined the Alliance, she was very much a daddy’s girl. Growing up in space on either her mother’s or father’s ships, she spent most of her younger years with her dad, since her mother was always off on classified missions. No family allowed. Hannah Shepard was a beautiful woman, and her father had mentioned many times that she looked exactly like her, but they really didn’t know each other very well. They loved each other, sure, but it was her father who basically raised her. Her mother and she had become closer once she reached adulthood, but she still turned to her father when she needed parental guidance. The time they spent the most together recently was right before her wedding. They planned it together. Since then, well, duty comes first. Speaking of which, she needs to report to the Captain. 

On her way out of the comm room, she notices the Captain is at the galaxy map, inputting the information on their mission to the Hawking Eta cluster. 

“Ah, there you are, Commander,” David says as he notices her standing behind him. “I’ve notified Joker of our destination. I have input the data from the mission debrief into the nav system. Go ahead and retrieve our ETA, once he has plotted our course. I have some reports to finish. Come talk to me later and we’ll have lunch. Yes?”

“Aye-Aye, sir.”

{{{}}} 

Walking up the gangway towards the bridge, Reza sees that Joker is mouthing off again as usual, to his co-pilot, Kaidan. She sneaks up behind them and joins the other occupant, Nihlus, standing behind the two bickering males, unaware of their audience. 

As they leave Arcturus station, Joker begins a commentary over the intercom:

“The Arcturus Prime relay is in range. Initiating transmission sequence. We are connected. Calculating transit mass and destination. Relay is hot, acquiring approach vector. All stations secure for transit. Board is green. Approach run has begun.”

Reza loves this part. The traveling through the Mass Relay systems throughout the galaxy gives her such a high. Plus, the fact that it is her husband who is piloting the ship towards these massive structures that pulls them like a slingshot across thousands of lightyears in a blink turns her on something fierce. If she had the ability, she would take advantage of this ‘high’ with him someday. Now is NOT the time. Too many eyes…

Speaking of too many...Nihlus turns towards her and sniffs the air. He knows exactly what she is thinking about and smirks at her. She flips him off and he grins at her as his subharmonics laugh at her gesture. He returns to watching the same spectacle as she; the Mass Relay jump they are about to do.

“Hitting the relay in 3…2…1.” 

As they are pulled into the relay, Joker sighs letting out a breath. It may look easy to those that don’t pilot, but piloting a ship through the relay takes a lot of skill. After relaxing a bit, he notices that he has an audience; one person in particular which makes him smirk. He knows how his wife feels when jumping through the Mass Relays, especially when she is around him and he's not surprised to find her lurking in the cockpit. Nihlus, though, he wasn’t prepared for the Turian to be sharing the experience with. Oh, well. He guesses that he should get used to the Turian’s presence. It seems he will be shadowing Reza some more. Maybe they can dump his ass somewhere unpleasant, if the guy pisses him off. He can only hope.

“Thrusters…check. Navigation…check. Internal emissions sink engage. All systems online. Drift…just under 1500 K.”

Nihlus speaks up, making Kaidan jump in surprise, not noticing their audience in the excitement of going through the Mass Relay. “1500 is good. Your Captain will be pleased.” Nihlus then turns around and after nodding at Reza, he continues down the gangway towards the CIC and beyond.

Reza looks after him and turns back towards the bridge when she hears Joker say, “I hate that guy.”

Crap! Her father is right. She needs to talk to her husband about Nihlus. She sighs and rakes a hand over her face. 

Kaidan looks aghast at Joker and says, “Nihlus gave you a compliment…so you hate him?”

“You remember to zip up your jumpsuit on the way out of the bathroom? That’s good. I just jumped us halfway across the galaxy and hit a target the size of a pinhead. So that’s incredible! Besides, Spectres are trouble. I don’t like having him on board. Call me paranoid.”

Kaidan says, “You’re paranoid. The Council helped fund this project. They have a right to send someone to keep an eye on their investment.”

“Yeah, that is the official story. But only an idiot believes the official story.”

Before more bickering can happen between the two Lieutenants, Reza interrupts and says, “They don’t send Spectres on shakedown runs.”

Joker agrees and adds, “So there’s more going on here than the Captain’s letting on.”

“I’ll find out soon enough. What’s our status, Joker?”

“Stealth systems are engaged. ETA to Presrop; 5 hours.” 

While Joker is explaining their ETA to their Commander, Kaidan is starring at her aghast at being caught bickering with Joker. He wasn’t expecting her to be in the cockpit and turns red in embarrassment. He slinks down in his chair to try to hide from her eyes, not knowing that she doesn’t see his discomfort, she only has eyes for her husband as he pilots the ship. 

“Roger that. Let me know when we are an hour out.”

“Yes, Ma’am.”

“Lt. Alenko?” Reza says finally looking at the slightly reddened Lt. sitting co-chair and waits for him to look at her.

He looks up, “Ma’am?”

“I’m going to need you on this mission. Corporal Jenkins, as well. Why don’t you gather him up and meet me down in the cargo bay. We’ll need to go over tactics as soon as possible.”

“Aye-aye, Ma’am,” Kaidan says, standing and saluting. She waves him off and he blushes again when he remembers that she told him saluting her was unnecessary. He had forgotten in his haste to respond to her orders. “Sorry…”

Reza laughs, relieving him of his stress, “No worries, LT, it will take time to get used to not saluting. I’ll meet you down in the cargo bay in about 20 minutes.”

He nods almost saluting her again and slinks off down the gangway before messing up again.

She turns back towards her husband who is laughing at her, “What?”

“Scaring the locals again, Commander? Must be that reputation…”

She huffs at him and leans over his chair to fiddle with the audio/visual display on his console. While doing so, she intentionally bumps his face with the side of her breast and slides her hand down his chest. “Oops! Sorry.”

Joker groans as she gently cups him through his trousers, sliding one hand up and down his hardening cock as she works on the console with the other hand. He asks huskily, “Is there something I can do to help you, Commander?”

“I got it. Thanks anyway, Lt.”

She straightens after briefly kissing him on the lips and whispering ‘I love you’ in his ear making him shiver. Noticing that no one was being the wiser of their brief interlude, since they are all working on their consoles going through the nav stats on the system they will be visiting, she kisses him once more with a little more passion. It was also an added plus, that her husband also has a reputation for being not someone to trifle with. And, with that reputation, no one visits the cockpit unless they want a smartass comment from him, who always seems to know that someone is lurking around. 

Moaning not only at the loss of her hand but also acknowledging the fact that they can’t continue their lustful acts, he asks his wife, trying to distract himself, “What did you get?”

She brings up her omni-tool with the stats of the ground team’s hardsuits and links them. “There. Now you have access to the ground teams’ hardsuit stats and the cameras with both audio and visual feeds.” 

Joker gapes at the incoming data on his console. He cycles through until he finds the hardsuit data for his wife. The current display from her hardsuit shows nothing, probably because her armor is somewhere dark. Just as he is about to comment, he sees that someone has opened a door, probably her locker, and is taking her suit out probably getting it ready for their mission. He sees a young marine start to work on the latches. “Who…?”

Reza peaks over his shoulder to see what Joker is looking at, “Oh, that’s Corporal Jenkins. He’s probably just getting ready for the mission. I didn’t ask him to check my armor, but I’m not going to say no, especially when I haven’t had a chance to do that myself. Too busy seducing my husband.”

Joker flicks his gaze up to her and then back to the feed, then when her comment registers, he looks back at her and grabs her hand to entwine his fingers with hers, “Thanks for the audio/visual feed. I was wondering how I was going to get through your missions without knowing what was going on…and, seduce away, babe.”

Reza smiles at him, “I didn’t want you to worry. This way, you will be with me too. Just remember that I do have a mission to complete and getting distracted isn’t always a good thing in situations requiring weapons.”

“Don’t worry. I won’t abuse it. But, there is a private channel, right?”

“Yes, you will have access to all of our private channels and the squad channel, as usual.”

“Sweet!”

“I have to go, babe,” she says squeezing his hand gently. “We will finish what I started later. I have a hankering for this sexy pilot of mine, something fierce. You know going through Mass Relays always makes me horny. One of these days…we will take advantage of that, right here in the bridge, then in the elevator, mess hall, our shower, engineering, cargo bay, pretty much anywhere I can get your trousers down.”

“Ah, shit, Rez…now I have those images in my head…at least I’m sitting down this time. Just go. Leave me here all alone, so I can combust in private.”

She leans into him and nuzzles his ear to say huskily, “I can’t wait to taste you on my tongue again. I want to swallow every last drop. Mmm,” she moans in his ear.

“Ok, that does it, I need a bathroom break.” He flicks on the autopilot and turns his chair around, making her scramble to back up and he smirks at her dark look. He stands up, grabs his crutches and shambles off a few steps before he turns back to her and says, “Are you coming, Commander?”

“Uh…”

“You are allowed a bathroom break. Are you not, Ma’am?”

Reza raises her eyebrows, ‘Oh really?’ So, he’s going to play the bathroom card. She has maybe 10 minutes until she absolutely has to be in the cargo bay to run drills. Well, why the hell not. She walks down the gangplank and heads for the female bathroom off the side of the CIC and after turning the corner; she waits until her husband walks into the male side and quickly joins him, locking the door behind her. 

…Seven in a half minutes later, she is bouncing down the stairs towards the elevator with a grin on her face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thanks for the kudos. Comments are always welcome.


	5. Preparation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thanks for all the kudos and comments. 
> 
> Comments really inspire me and the one I received about Joker's fantasies really got my creative juices flowing and in a couple chapters you'll see how...

Reza walks into the elevator to go down the one level to the cargo bay. She can’t stop smiling. She just left a very satisfied husband and that thought alone was enough to make her feel amazing. Although the saying of ‘a happy wife, a happy life’ is definitely true, for her, making her snarky stubborn husband happy, meant the world to her. More than anything, the fact that he can put up with her, is a miracle by itself. Earlier, when she told her father that Joker made her very very happy, that was putting the feelings she has for him mildly. He meant the world to her and when he asked her to marry him; she all but died with happiness. He was an amazing man and pretty much from the moment she met him, she knew that he was it for her. And, through all the ups and downs of their relationship, through Akuze and Torfan, she fought with every fiber of her being to keep him in her life and now, she is the happiest wife in the galaxy. She has her soulmate. 

Realizing that she’s smiling like an idiot thinking about her gorgeous husband who’s probably feeling like a million credits right about now in his pilot’s seat, which he should, because she made sure of it in those precious stolen moments with him, she tries to calm down and put her Commander face back on. Looking around and seeing that the elevator car is slowly moving downward, she shakes her head and almost laughs at the very idea that the Normandy; being the most state of the art warship in the Alliance, has an elevator that runs at a snail’s pace. Ha! Oh, well. At least this way, she can show up as her badass vanguard self and not as a wife who just gave her husband head...on duty. 

{{{}}}

As the elevator doors finally open upon the cargo bay, she sees that Lt. Alenko is running combat drills with the marine detail assigned to the Normandy, as Nihlus and the Captain watch. She nods at the both of them and salutes the Captain in acknowledgement, and walks over toward the Mako, leaning against it to watch the Lieutenant lead the six soldiers that make up the detail through the basic drills. The detail is made up of two three-man teams that are alternates to her and her ground team; which currently is staffed by Lt. Alenko and Nihlus. The makeup of a typical ground team is normally three people, but can be four or more if they have a vehicle or need a specialist. The marines on the Normandy have all different specialties and she’s looking forward to mixing it up a little as they are assigned missions.

Alenko walks over to her and hands her a datapad. “Here’s the roster, Commander.”

She takes that datapad from him and scrolls through the backgrounds of the personnel listed. “Good.” Continuing to scroll through the data, she says, “Give me the rundown, Lt.”

“Team alpha’s squad leader, you’ve met, is Corporal Jenkins. He’s trained as a soldier but has the additional specialty as an infiltrator. His scores on a sniper rifle are exemplary and currently he holds a perfect record on the heavy canon.”

“Fantastic.”

Alenko continues to tell her about the rest of team alpha and she nods in the affirmative that with their combination of specialties will make a great alternate ground team should they be needed. 

“Service Chief LaFlamme is an adept class biotic, L3n. About mid-range in power but can create a highly sufficient warp field. His squad mates are an engineer class and a soldier class. There are a variety of specialties between them.” 

Reza purses her lips as she continues to scan through the information on the datapad and nods at the Lt when he finishes his summary of the marine personnel. Looking up at him, she says, “Line them up. I would like to do an inspection. Include weapons.”

Lt. Alenko informs the Chief to line them up and stands in front of the squad at attention once they do so with their weapons at their side. She walks over and salutes the Lt and says, “With me,” as she walks crisply over to the tense marines, every inch the highly decorated, N7, Lieutenant Commander, and XO of the ship.

Alenko follows her and stands at attention at her side as she stops in front of Chief LaFlamme first and starts her inspection. He watches her inspect the Chief’s weapon and when she doesn’t find any flaws, she converses with the Chief; asking him questions about his service record, his biotics, and then asks personal questions, like where he grew up, if he has a family, etc. Nodding at the Chief once she is satisfied with his answers, she continues down the line stopping at the next soldier and continues this same method of getting to know each of the men assigned to her. He watches amazed as he sees the men who were just a few minutes ago terrified at getting inspected by the great ‘Commander Shepard’ now smiling and relaxing enough to talk easily with her as she gets to know them at the personal level. He tries not to smirk; she did this to him earlier, humanizing herself to him, making him see beyond ‘the hero’ or ‘The Butcher of Torfan,’ and seeing her for what she is; a badass soldier who has earned the respect of all.

Finishing up with all the men, she returns to the front and faces them. “Based on what I’ve learned from your service records and after talking with all of you, I’m looking forward to serving with each and every one of you, this tour. Whatever comes our way in the next few weeks, I know that we have the talent and know how to do whatever it takes to succeed. And, not only will we succeed because we are marines in the Alliance, but because we are badass marines, who gets the job done, not only with style, but down on the ground, getting dirty. Am I right! Who’s like us?”

The whole marine detail and Lt. Alenko all salute and yell, “Damn few. And they’re all dead!”

“Lt Alenko, Corporal Jenkins, and Chief LaFlamme, please come see me after training. Otherwise, carry on,” and she salutes Alenko before making a precision about face and walks over to join the Captain and Nihlus as they watch the squad move back into their formations to finish running the combat drills, overseen by the Lt.

“I’m impressed, Commander. You took a bunch of marines who were terrified of you and made them into four legged baby mammals, willing to follow you to the edge of the galaxy and back, should you ask that of them…in only a few minutes.” Nihlus says looking at Reza as she joins them and watches the training commence. 

Reza looks at David and quirks an eyebrow and mouths ‘four legged baby mammals’ at him, clearly confused.

David chuckles, “I think he means puppy dogs.”

“Oh…well it makes it easier to give orders when they don’t feint from just being in the same room with you.”

Nihlus frowns at her, “Does that happen often?”

She looks at David again and they turn away with their lips twitching, both remembering several instances where they had subordinates feint at the sight of them. She shrugs and says, “Sometimes...”

Huh. He admits, Reza Shepard has an impressive service record. It was the reason she was being considered for the honor of being named the first human Spectre. Looking over at the personnel assigned to her, he’s looking forward to their mission to Presrop. He’s seen what she can do in combat before, but hasn’t seen her lead troops, yet. 

{{{}}}

After the detail finishes their training, Lt. Alenko, Chief LaFlamme, and Corporal Jenkins report to Reza, as ordered. 

Looking at the Captain, she says, “Do you want to watch?”

David shakes his head, “I have reports to finish. Have fun.”

She grins and turns back towards her men. She says, ‘at ease gentlemen’ and waves them over to the end of the cargo bay to give them room for what she is planning. 

David turns to the Turian at his side, “Nihlus, you may want to stay and watch the fireworks. She’s going to test the Lt and Chief on their biotics. Trust me, the entertainment by itself will be worth it,” and grins and walks away towards the elevator. 

Nihlus shrugs and walks over to the crates stacked against the bulkhead to make himself comfortable. Apparently there was another show to watch.

Ignoring the Turian spectator, Reza looks at the array of expressions upon the men in front of her; Alenko looks curious but excited, LaFlamme looks expectant but worried, and Jenkins has a wide smile on his face, looking pleased to be included, even though he’s not a biotic. He was bouncing a little on his feet and she turns her head to hide a small smile at his exuberance. 

“The reason I asked you to meet with me is because we have a mission later today and since we haven’t served together before, I wanted to see who among you fit best with my combat style. Each of you has the best scores within the detail; either in combat or with biotics, or both, like in your case Alenko.”

They nod in understanding.

She looks at the Corporal and says, “Jenkins, your scores and experience with the Mako are impressive and I would like you to join our mission later, either way. I will need someone with your skill on the guns, just in case. You game?”

“Yes, Ma’am!”

“Good. Please make sure the Mako is ready. Utilize other members of the detail should you need them. I don’t think she has been tested for viability yet. We will be going into a lot of inhospitable environments and I need to know that the Mako can handle such places as we are likely to encounter. Check the seals, the oxygen reserves, the whole shebang…understood? It’s going to be our home away from home while groundside on our missions. Make sure she’s ready; fully lubed and wet for us. Got me?” she says using the crude vernacular all marines used when readying their ground vehicles. Jenkins nods fully understanding what she is asking for. 

Nihlus overhears this and shifts uncomfortably in his perch on the crates, fuck Rez…that was entirely unfair, giving him that image. Even knowing she said it in regards to the fucking tank sitting in the corner of the cargo bay; he frowns at her, his subharmonics working overtime as he grumbles to himself to get over it already. She’s mated and happy, or so it would seem, considering the overpowering scent of arousal and satisfaction that those two exhibited around each other earlier this morning. And, if he wasn’t mistaken, something had occurred right before she entered the cargo bay…something that made her cheeks redden and her eyes light up. Shaking off these thoughts that could get his ass handed to him should she take offense again to his thoughts, he turns back to the show about to commence across the cargo bay. 

Reza waves her hand toward the tank in invitation and says to the Corporal, “Carry on…”

He stands at attention and salutes and moves off gathering several of the detail standing at the sidelines watching and they get to work on the Mako, readying her to the specifications needed to handle whatever they have to experience to get the job done. 

Reza turns back towards the anxious LaFlamme and the grinning Lt. “Alright, gentlemen, let’s have some fun,” she says rubbing her hands together with excitement. She helps them set up the cargo bay with the appropriate items to help them train their respective biotic techniques; Adept, Sentinel, and Vanguard, without hurting others. And, for the next couple of hours, they don’t stop as they learn to work together, combining their respective talents. 

Reza stops and wipes sweat off her brow with her forearm and looks at a red-faced Chief, straining to finish transferring the small weighted ball from one-side to the other across the bay and once it crosses the line they had lain as an end zone, he drops it, sagging his tense stance and sits down on the cold floor to hang his head in exhaustion. Walking over to grab a cold bottle of water and a towel from the Lt who was watching from the sidelines, she walks over to the Chief and sits next to him and hands the items to him. He nods in thanks and downs half the water before holding the cold bottle to his face and neck letting it cool him off. “Why don’t you take a break, Chief, you’ve done enough today.” 

He looks up at her and nods, still too exhausted to speak. 

She gets up and holds out her hand towards him. He grabs it and she helps him stand up. He staggers a little and she steadies him with a hand on the shoulder. He looks at her gratefully and smiles. “Orden…May I call you that?” He nods. “Orden, you are improving. You’ve definitely loosened up a little in your stance when releasing your mnemonics. Keep working on that. Otherwise, good job today. Grab some more water…” she waves towards the bench and watches as he nods at her and does just that. Reza turns towards the Lt and smiles evilly at him, quirking an eyebrow, and throws out a challenge, “Ok, Alenko, since you are clearly not sweating enough, let’s spar. If you think you can take me?” 

He stands up and takes off his uniform shirt revealing the standard tank underneath and rolls his shoulders before walking over to the middle of the bay to beckon to her with a smirk, taking up her challenge. She smiles and also takes her shirt off to get ready to kick a little biotic ass. In just a sports-bra and her uniformed trousers and boots, she stretches her arms over her head inadvertently making every male in the room groan as her movement shows off her muscled arms and defined abs. She rolls her head around cracking her neck and walks opposite of the Lt to the other side of the bay and faces him; sizing up her competition, ready for whatever Alenko can dish out. 

{{{}}} 

Corporal Jenkins walks over and joins the Chief sitting on the bench, totally engrossed in watching the spectacle in front of him as he watches the XO and the Lt spar with each other, and grabs a towel to wipe the grease from the Mako, from his forehead. They watch them move fluidly around each other using combat moves and biotics alike depending upon whichever movement is needed from each attack. They both groan as they watch their XO use Alenko’s body weight against him and follows through with throwing him to the ground when he tries to grab her in a choke hold. 

Kaidan flips onto his stomach and jumps to his feet just as Shepard shoots forward into a slight charge at his feet and rolls under him making him trip and fall back onto his face. She gives him space to get back to his feet, a little slower this time, and prepares for retaliation. He looks up at her and narrows his eyes when he notices that she’s laughing maniacally at him, clearly enjoying getting the best of him, again. He hasn’t been able to get the better of her, yet. Of course, she is an N7, so he’s not really surprised, but he has a few tricks up his sleeve yet, so maybe he can surprise her. It’s not often when he can spar with biotics…

Jenkins whistles as he watches the Lt make a bold move and put the Commander in a stasis field, once he stands up. Thinking he now has the upper hand for once, since she is now immobile, Kaidan moves forward readying his next attack. Just as he encloses within a few feet of Reza, she breaks the field and blows the energy out catching him in the act of moving forward which instead pushes him backwards several feet, falling to the ground. However, instead of landing heavily and possibly jarring something, he uses the momentum to do a backward roll and staggers back to his feet. Feeling winded, he leans his hands on his knees and looks at her with surprise, as he catches his breath.

Reza quirks an eyebrow at him and leans into one hip and folds her arms against her chest, waiting to see if he is ready to continue. He puts up two fingers, meaning he needs a couple of minutes to rest before being ready to go again. She nods and grabs a towel at the bench in front of the lockers and wipes off her face, impressed with the amount of power he had put into his stasis field. She was already surprised at the amount of concentration he had when they were moving items across the cargo bay from one end to the other, before their sparring session. She was able to move every weighted item they were using, but it was quick, from one side to the other. His movements were more controlled and precise, slower, showing the amount of control he had over his biotics. His power was impressive, but his control was more awe worthy. She’ll have to practice with him more often. 

Jenkins looks at the Chief who is looking at the Commander in surprise, astonished that she was able to break free of a stasis field, which is extremely hard to do. Not knowing the significance of such a fete, Jenkins asks him, “Why aren’t you sparring with them?”

Orden looks at the young Corporal aghast at the idea, “Are you fucking kidding me? I would be toast against them. I kind of like living.”

Jenkins looks at him and then at the Lt and the XO as they return to opposite sides of the bay readying themselves for another round. “Am I missing something?”

Orden waves his hands in the direction of the XO as she waves her hand and biotically throws the heavy bag leaning against the wall opposite from Alenko, aiming it straight at his head. He blocks it with his barrier, doming it around him and when it bounces off, he waves his hand to lift it above him and has it hover just long enough to catch the XO’s attention, showing his immense control over his biotics and when she hesitates just long enough, he flicks his hand throwing it straight at her, giving her a split second to respond. Instead of blocking it or flicking it aside with another throw, she charges straight at it, making it explode in midair. That’s when everything in the cargo bay within 30 feet suddenly ends up covered in grey sand including the XO, the Lt, and their spectators; the Chief and the Corporal. 

As the dust settles around them, everyone turns to gape at the Commander as she looks back at them, clearly surprised. Suddenly, she shrugs and says grinning, “Oops!”

Corporal Jenkins jumps up from his seated position on the bench and raises his arms over his head with two thumbs up, spreading more dust around and yells, “That was awesome!”

Everyone bursts out laughing. 

{{{}}}

“Do I even want to know…?” David says as he walks into the cargo bay noticing the cloud of grey dust settling over everyone and everything. He stops next to the laughing Turian on the sidelines, far enough not to have been touched by the exploding heavy bag, and looks in consternation at his dust covered XO and Lt, laughing their asses off. 

Reza hears the question and turns around and straightens when she sees David looking confused at the spectacle she has caused. After grabbing her shirt, she leaves everyone else gasping and tearing up from laughing so hard to walk over to her CO and grins up at him. He raises an eyebrow and looks her over and then at the room beyond. “Let’s just say that you will need to requisition a new heavy bag,” she says by way of explanation.

He frowns at her and drops his head into his hand and then peaks at her through his fingers, “Another one, Rez?”

“Sorry…when we dock on Arcturus again, I’ll buy a new one,” she grins impishly. 

David shakes his head at her and rolls his eyes, she’s hopeless, and asks, “Had a successful training session? It seems so…” he says as he sees her crew laughing behind her retelling what happened and ribbing each other as they start to clean up the mess. 

She looks fondly at the four men behind her and says, “Yes. Each of them has potential. The young Corporal has perfect scores in weaponry and will be a great addition to my ground team when we use the Mako. The Chief has passable power and control over his biotics, takes critique well, and is willing to improve his skills, so I will keep him as first alternate.”

“And the Lt? How does his abilities fair?” Truthfully, he was worried how the Lt stacked up against her. She could be ruthless if needed, but was a fair judge of combat and biotic skill. Since she will be leading all ground missions, the squad she picks for her ground team will have to compliment her in every way to accomplish the missions that will be assigned, successfully. She will also have to adjust to accommodate them in turn, making them a cohesive group. His worry stems from the Lt’s reserved attitude and tendency to follow the book to the letter which has been the reason behind his slow movement up the chain, however, his skills were too impressive to pass up when he was vetting his crew for the Normandy. He was also worried that the obvious crush the Lt. had on the Commander would be detrimental to his health once Reza caught on. 

“Truthfully, he’s quite impressive. I’ve never seen an L2 biotic Sentinel with his control before. I’m hoping before this tour is over, I can glean some of that knowledge from him, as well. He’s quite powerful when he lets loose and I just got a taste of that during our sparring session. You know me; I’ll help him loosen up even if I have to drag it out of him. All in all, I’m thrilled that he will be on my ground team since our combat and biotic skills are pretty synced up.”

David looks at her impressed that she has been able to determine that in such a short time, especially after one training session and one sparring session with the man. “That’s great news…” he pauses and pulls her aside away from Nihlus and asks quietly, “What about…uh…you know…uh…” she looks up at him and frowns waiting for him to spit it out, whatever he was having a hard time with. Finally, he shrugs, “Alenko clearly has a crush on you. Are you going to be able to deal with that? Is that going to ruin the camaraderie you have already established? I just want to know if I need to transfer him the next time we dock.”

Reza lets out a low chuckle, deciding to play with her godfather for a bit. She purses her lips and looks over at the Lt as he laughs over something the Chief is saying as they sweep up her mess. She’ll have to buy them all beers for doing that for her. “Hmm, well he is handsome. Maybe Joker wouldn’t mind if I bring in a third person to our relationship…”

“REZANA…!”

She giggles when David says her name loudly, making everyone look over at them curious as to why their Captain would use her first name in such a way. David just waves at them and turns to face her to look at her with a deep frown, clearly upset, until he sees her bite her lip and starts to shake with her merriment for teasing him. “That wasn’t very nice.”

“Fun though…”

He grimaces at her and shakes his head. “So…?”

She smiles at him and looks back at the Lt in question and notices that he looks away suddenly as though he was just looking at her and sighs, “I think eventually I will need to bring him into my confidence and tell him I’m off the market. I don’t want to hurt him, both mentally and physically, just in case he takes my resistance to mean I’m playing hard to get. Plus, he’s already friends with Jeff, and since my stubborn snarky husband doesn’t make friends easily, I don’t want to ruin that for him. I especially don’t want to invoke my husband’s tendency to become jealous and have him lash out. I need to make sure Kaidan can be completely trustworthy though, which I have a feeling he can be, so I’ll wait until I feel the time is right.”

David had also looked at the Lt, also noticing his slip of attention towards her and says, “Don’t wait too long.” She nods at him. He looks her over seeing that the dust has now caked itself onto her in wet splotches all over her face and uniform. “Why don’t you go and get cleaned up and meet me in the mess hall for our lunch date. I’ll make sure your mess is cleaned up appropriately.”

“Ok. Yeah, I owe the guys a beer for cleaning up after me.” She looks down at herself and grimaces lifting her arm and sniffing herself, “I am feeling a bit too sticky and apparently don’t smell too good. I might need a long shower to hose myself off.”

Just now noticing the smell coming off of her, he steps back a few paces and waves his hand towards the elevator, “Take your time…” trying to hold his breath.

She huffs at him knowing that he is just trying to be polite, but in truth, she really does stink. Her sweat from the training and the sparring match didn’t help matters, but it was the old sweat smell from the heavy bag itself that was starting to permeate the air around her and she scowls knowing that her uniform is probably ruined. Oh well, she rolls her eyes, just another casualty in the life of Rezana Shepard, biotic badass extraordinaire...

{{{}}} 

After getting several amused if disgusted glances from the crew, she hurries and enters the med bay to pass through to her quarters to get cleaned up, when she comes face to face with her shirtless husband as he sits upon one of the beds getting scanned by the Doctor. Gulping at the sight of him, she stares at his chest, tracing the lines of defined muscle and taut abs. Oh Gods, she wants to lick him all over. Shaking her head to clear the lust induced fog of arousal, she looks at the scanner and back at him and starts to ask why he’s here, when he interrupts her after getting a better look at the state she’s in; standing in only her sports bra, BDU trousers, and combat boots, covered in what is now grey mud. 

Smirking at her, Joker asks, “Did I miss the mud wrestling competition while being poked and prodded by the doc for my physical?”

Shaking her head and rolling her eyes at him, she explains, “Had a run in with a heavy bag.”

Looking her over again, pausing on her bared midriff, he says, “Did you win?”

Grinning, “Yes, yes I did.”

They smile at each other. 

In the meantime, the doc was looking her over and notes that she’s trailing dust behind her. She clucks her tongue and grimaces, “Rezana, please remove yourself from my clean med bay before I take a stick to you.”

Rolling her eyes at the outraged Doctor, she winks at her husband who is laughing at the glare the doc is giving the two of them and waves at him as she walks past and disappears into their quarters, to take a much needed hot shower. 

Joker looks after her and thinks maybe this is his opportunity to repay his wife in kind for their earlier indiscretion. Hmm, how to sneak past the doc, that’s the real issue... 

A few minutes later, an opportunity presents itself to him. After finishing the preliminary scan for his requisite physical and additional scans for his condition, he was still trying to come up with a reason to go to his quarters while pausing to put his shirt back on, when the doc gets distracted by one of the crew who had singed their hand while tinkering with a soldering iron. Not knowing how long Karin’s back would be turned taking care of the idiot, he makes haste and without a rustle of his crutches, he sneaks past her and follows his wife into their shared quarters, none the wiser. 

{{{}}}

Doctor Chakwas looks up when the med bay doors open and Kaidan Alenko walks in looking hesitant. “Kaidan, you need something?” she asks walking over to him.

He turns his head to the side and rubs the back of his neck in embarrassment, “Oh, I was just hoping I could get a shot.”

Knowing automatically what he is asking for, she looks more closely at him and asks, “Feeling a migraine coming on?”

“Uh…no, not yet...After the training and sparring session with the Commander earlier, I just wanted to prevent one from appearing that could affect my performance later on, during our mission.”

“Oh, good thinking…sure, I have something I can give you. Take a seat,” Karin says pointing at the closest bed. 

After sitting, Kaidan looks around the med bay and waits patiently for the doc to walk over to her stores of meds and make up the shot that will help him prevent any latent issues for the amount of biotic energy he expended during his spar session with the Commander, earlier. Just thinking about those couple of hours spent with her during their biotic training session and then again when he was asked if he wanted to spar with her, he smiles at the memory. He’s never had that much fun training with another biotic before. Even the few Vanguards he has had the pleasure to serve with, they wouldn’t stand a chance against the Commander. The amount of energy she has, turned him on something fierce. The way she combines her combat training with her biotics were completely synced. She was fluid grace and when they were sparring, he had to loosen up and come at her full strength to even keep up with her. Even then, he could tell that she had pulled back so she didn’t destroy him. And, when she broke through his stasis field…Oh Holy Hell, he had instantly hardened. The fact that she was able to do something only Asari Matriarchs were able to do after years of practice, he almost moans out loud remembering. Actually, he had focused on that particular memory very astutely in the shower before coming here to the med bay. He couldn’t help himself. After the stimulation of her dress the previous day and the sparring session, he had to take care of his ache for her; else he would walk around her the rest of the day with the evidence that he was affected by her. 

Just as the doc was headed over to him with the shot in her hand, he feels a buzzing at the back of his head like someone is expending a large burst of biotic energy and looks around again and pauses at the door in the back with a red do not enter lock on it. He rubs the area around his amp port, looking suspicious for a second and then shrugs when the energy dissipates…‘huh.’

Karin catches him looking at the room in the back of the med bay and catches his exclamation, “What is it?”

He looks up at her and shrugs, “Oh, I…uh just thought I felt a release of biotic energy, that’s all. I guess I’m just feeling the vestiges of my training earlier. My amp port is a little sensitive, hence my visit to see you.”

She frowns…wait, that doesn’t make sense. She looks at the back room and wonders what may have happened that would cause Rezana to expend her energy while cleaning up. Then, she realizes that she never saw Joker leave the med bay after his physical…Oh! She reddens and looks away from the Lt and shakes her head, grinning. Good for them, they are definitely making up for lost time. She hurries up and gives the Lt the shot and says, “All set.”

Rubbing the injection site on his neck, Kaidan smiles in thanks and stands up, “See you later, Doc,” and waves as he exits the med bay. 

Not five minutes later, the back door opens and Rez walks out, dressed in a new uniform, pinning her hair up into a bun freshly washed. Before she can walk half way through the med bay, she is stopped by Karin who is holding up a hand. Quirking an eyebrow, Reza pauses and then turns back towards the back room when Joker exits. He pauses when he sees that both his wife and the doctor are looking at him. Sighing, obviously caught, he shrugs and crutches over to them. 

Karin narrows her eyes at them and looks them over, noting Reza’s reddened cheeks and Jeff’s enamored expression as he looks at his wife standing next to him. They both look relaxed and happy. Good. Her favorite couple has been through too much pain in their young lives and even though this tour is short, she’s glad that they have this time to spend together before whatever the Captain and that Spectre Nihlus has planned for Reza. She may not be privy to all the secrets, but as many years as she has been in the Alliance, she can sniff out that something is brewing and it all centers around the young woman in front of her, someone she considers to be family. They both are. She may have not known Jeff as long, but she knew Reza’s parents and practically raised the girl when she was sequestered on the ships her father served on as he rose in ranks, while her mother was unavailable. Even though she approves of their indiscretions, she decides to play the scolding parent, “Really? On duty…do you have no shame?”

Reza looks down, her cheeks red and says, “I have no idea what you are talking about, I had to get cleaned up, besides…” she straightens and says, “Lunchtime.” 

Karin winks at her and hides her grin and looks at a smug Jeff, quirking an eyebrow at him, waiting for his excuse.

He shrugs and points at himself, “Messy eater.”

Karin chokes and looks away coughing.

Reza gasps and gawks at her husband for his blatant exclamation. She pinches his side making him yelp, glaring at her, “What? I am…”

She hisses at him, “She’s practically like a mother to me; you can’t say things like that to her.”

Joker eyes his wife who is clearly embarrassed, and the doc who is red-faced but is smiling at them; he responds with, “Then she should be used to it by now.”

“Ugh…come on smartass, before you get us kicked out of our room,” and walks ahead of him and exits the med bay with Jeff not far behind, chuckling in her wake. 

Karin watches them leave and after the door shuts, starts laughing. Life is never dull with those two around.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Sorry this chapter took so long, I had trouble with parts of this chapter & needed to work out some kinks. Also, I tend to write whatever pops into my head, even it concerns parts of the trilogy that I can't post yet, because it happens to coincide with ME2 & not where this story currently falls; which is not even really ME1, yet. I mean really...stupid muse. Oh well, I guess I have some really awesome chapters for the future... :P


	6. Surrender

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: This chapter is NSFW at the end. Enjoy! It's a long one...
> 
> Thanks for all the kudos and comments.

“Uh, Commander, using the thrusters on the Mako doesn’t make it go any faster,” Joker snarks over the comm channel as he watches the ground team’s stats on his new audio/visual display on his console, as his crazy wife drives the Mako across the desolate moon of Presrop. He cringes as he watches the Mako make a 360 degree turn in mid-air as Reza drives full tilt across the terrain. They had been groundside less than 15 minutes after touching down from a text book low atmo drop he executed when they arrived at their destination after dropping out of FTL. They were on their way to the biotic compound where they hoped to find a peaceful resolution to the dilemma that Reza’s former CO, Major Kyle, has found himself involved in. 

“But the thrusters make the ride that much more interesting.”

“It’s a fucking tank, Ma’am. Kind of like a marine….only goes one speed.”

“Shut it, Flight Lieutenant…Trying to drive here.” 

“Yeah, ‘trying’ being the operative word...”

Nihlus laughs nervously from the passenger seat while clutching the ‘oh shit’ handle with all his strength. He had forgotten that Shepard was a crazy driver. She enjoys the rush of adrenaline as she ignores all the safe guards and drives like her life depends on how fast she can make the vehicle go, no matter the obstacle. Considering what had happened to their rented skycar on the Citadel during one of their assignments, he should have figured that having her drive again was a bad idea. He had thought, however, that since the Mako wasn’t a skycar, this might have ended up a little different. Clearly he was wrong. 

Corporal Jenkins sitting in the crow’s nest of the weapons turret, whoops out an excited yell, clearly enjoying himself, as she makes the Mako take a flying leap off the cliff they had just climbed in a vertical ascent to the top to see the surrounding vistas in the inhospitable environment of the moon they were exploring. Not seeing any obstructions in their way to the commune where their target is supposed to be, Reza guns it. 

Lt Alenko, not enjoying their joyride, stares aghast at the fast approaching ground from the view window in the cockpit and turns slightly green when they do a flip in midair. 

While monitoring the ground team’s hardsuit diagnostics over her omni-tool, Doctor Chakwas, safely ensconced with the Captain in the communication room on the Normandy, opens a ship to shore squad channel to the Mako. “Doctor Chakwas to ground crew.”

“Go ahead,” Reza responds.

“Just checking in, Commander. You may want to know that all vitals are good, slightly high on dopamine and adrenalin levels. However, one of your squad mates is about to blow chunks all over the interior of the Mako, if you don’t stop and take a break,” Karin says grinning at David as he sniggers into his palm as they watch the audio/visual display from the ground team’s cameras. 

Reza taps the thrusters to land the Mako gently on the ground after their wild descent, and once they are parked, she looks at her squad mates in question and notices that Kaidan is looking less than healthy at the moment. Watching him lean over in his seat to dangle his head between his knees, she says looking concerned, “You can get out and walk around, Lt, clear your head. However, I recommend not retching in your helmet. It’s a bitch to clean. Trust me, I know.”

Kaidan says a muffled ‘noted’ from his position of having his head between his knees. 

Nihlus lets out a sigh and a grimace as he releases the handle and shakes his hand to get the blood circulating again after holding on so tight. Hearing a muffled giggle at his side, he turns to glare at his partner as she smirks at him. Narrowing his eyes, he says, “You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?”

She grins, “Maybe.” 

Nihlus shakes his head, she’s hopeless, and there is no point in admonishing her for having a little bit of fun. She is clearly enjoying herself. Her cheeks are flushed and her eyes are glowing with excitement. Plus, he knows that she would never endanger them, truly. Scare the shit out of them, yes, but never put their lives in jeopardy. 

Joker speaks up, “If Alenko blows chunks in his helmet…I have dibs on teasing him about it for the rest of his life.”

Reza rolls her eyes, “I’m sure you will do that anyway.”

“Goody.”

Kaidan raises his head and glares at the comm unit, “Watch it. I may not be feeling well, but I can still hear you, Joker, and fair warning, payback is a bitch.”

“Ha! Bring it on!” Joker says laughing. Suddenly a thought occurs to him, “Wait…Kaidan, you went through a basic flight course and had to pass the flight simulator ‘free fall’ program…right? After that, you shouldn’t have any motion sickness. Wait…did you blow chunks there, too?” Joker says getting excited.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Kaidan says grudgingly, turning red when Reza looks back at him inquiringly.

“Whoa, are you ‘that’ recruit? No way! Perfect scores and perfect mess? You’re legendary!” Joker laughs uproariously over the comm channel.

Kaidan slinks down into his seat and his queasiness turns into embarrassment. Shit. Getting tired of being laughed at, he snarls, “Shut it, Joker!”

Wheezing in between bouts of laughter, Joker exclaims, “Yeah, you are never living this down, man!”

“Ugh!” Kaidan says turning away from the other occupants in the Mako who are staring at him.

Reza looks at her very embarrassed Lt and the camera on the dash of the Mako that looks into the interior of the cabin and decides to give her Lt a break and asks, “What are you talking about, Joker?” 

Calming somewhat, seeing the question in his wife’s eyes and a small warning as they narrow at him, Joker explains, “In flight school, there is a nasty sim program all recruits must pass to graduate. It’s kind of a Zero-G scenario for pilots. It’s extremely nasty and makes most people get queasy afterwards. Everyone hates having to take it, but it does weed out the losers who just can’t hack it, so…Anyway, in all the history of who’s taken this sim, only two recruits have perfect scores. As you can already guess, yours truly holds one of the slots…”

Reza asks after Joker pauses, “And the other?” 

“The other is the legend. Not a good legend, mind you, but a legend nonetheless for what he did. After successfully completing the sim and achieving a perfect score, which no one prior to him had ever done before, he turns around and upchucks on the flight controls, earning him the nickname, ‘Perfect Upchuck.’ It was never revealed who this legend was and even though to this day, no one has achieved a perfect score other than me, of course, the legend lives on and is infamous at flight school. So, Kaidan…buddy…it’s an honor to finally meet you!” Not being able to hold it in any longer, Joker starts laughing again, in great heaves. 

Reza mutes the audio from the Normandy and stares incredulously at her Lt with raised eyebrows. Somewhat relieved from the silence in the Mako, Kaidan looks at her and reddens slightly at her scrutiny. “So…?” she says looking questioningly, he slinks further into his seat and nods in assent, confirming that Joker is correct in assuming he is the legend from flight school.

Reza’s mouth twitches and she turns aside and starts giggling and soon the entire ground team is laughing. Kaidan wishes the ground would just open up and swallow him whole, but when Reza looks back at him with her eyes shining with a look of understanding, he smiles back and decides what the hell, there is no time like the present to get over it already and laugh too. He may go down in history as the ‘Perfect Upchuck’ of lore, but in truth, being the first to achieve the perfect score was worth it, and being first is definitely better than second. Next time Joker wants to tease him, he will point this out. Knowing the flight lieutenant as he does, that distinction will bother him the most. Kaidan winks at his XO and finally starts to laugh.

Waiting for his squad mates to calm, Corporal Jenkins looks down at the Commander and asks curious, “When did you blow chunks in your helmet, Commander?”

Reza grimaces.

Catching the look, Jenkins blanches and says, “I’m sorry. You don’t have to tell me.”

“No worries, Corporal. It was during the mission to Akuze. I’ll just leave it at that if you don’t mind,” Reza looks back at the controls and frowns trying hard not to relive some of the memories that begin to churn within her. Flashes of the horrors of that day, completely rids her of her levity of just moments before. 

“Of course.”

Watching the emotions flash across his wife’s face, Joker switches to her private channel, and says concerned, “Nod if you are okay, Rez. I’ll kick the kid in the balls later.”

Mentally shaking her head to get rid of the images of screaming squad mates as they are dragged underground or hit with Thresher Maw acid, Rez flicks haunted eyes to the camera and nods her head. 

“Good.” Joker says reassuringly. Then he adds quietly, “I love you.”

She smiles slightly at the feed and pats her mouth with two fingers, a gesture Joker recognizes as a ‘kiss’ gesture to him. It was her way of letting him know that she appreciates him even though she’s not able to say it out loud. 

Ready to get their mission back on track, Reza looks back at the Lt, who is finally sitting up in his seat with his normal coloring and asks, “Better now?”

“Yeah. Next time, I think I’ll not eat right before any missions.”

She grins evilly, “You’re a smart marine, Lt.”

Kaidan laughs wincing at the possibilities. 

{{{}}}

After analyzing the data derived from their instruments monitoring the biotic commune directly in front of the Mako, for a few moments to verify that there is no direct threat, Reza drives the Mako cautiously up to the entrance. After parking, she looks at her tense ground team. “Alright, gentlemen, here’s the plan. I served with Major Kyle on several tours before and leading up to Torfan. I’m sure you are all familiar with how that mission turned out. I also would recommend never calling me by the nickname the media dubbed me because of that fun mission. Let’s just say, it will not end well for you, if you do. There were other circumstances leading up to the mission that I cannot disclose at this time, however, the unclassified bit about Major Kyle is; he went nuts during the mission and as second in command, I had to take over. Afterward, he was encouraged to retire early and was discharged. You are all aware of how this current situation can turn out. I hope we don’t have to resort to the worst case scenario, but just in case… Corporal, I would like you to stay here in the Mako. If things end badly, we may need the extra fire power, so be on guard.” 

“Aye-aye, Ma’am,” Jenkins says as he seals himself inside the self-contained turret and starts monitoring their surroundings.

“Nihlus…Kaidan, with me,” Rez says as they all put on their helmets and prepare to leave. Making sure everyone is ready; they jump down from the Mako and walk out to the compound’s entrance. 

“This is a private sanctuary. Outsiders are not welcome here.” A voice says through the intercom once Reza walks up to the entrance to the residential unit. 

“I need to talk to the man in charge. It’s important,” Reza says, looking behind her to take note of her squad mates; Nihlus is at her six, watching her back and Kaidan is at her three o’clock, checking their surroundings for any danger. 

The voice says irritated, “Father Kyle wants nothing more to do with the Alliance.”

Assuming the worst, Reza continues, “He shouldn’t have killed those investigators. This problem isn’t going to go away.”

“We won’t let you take Father Kyle away! He protects us. We need him!”

Shaking her head, “He’s leading you to your deaths! If you fight the Alliance, you’ll all get slaughtered. I’m your last chance. Let me talk to him, or people start dying.”

Reza tenses and motions to her squad to be ready. The voice on the intercom says, “Wait…” in resignation. “Father Kyle will speak with you. Head to the building at the far end of the compound. He’ll meet you there.”

Reza nods and turns around and motions for her squad to follow her. Before setting off towards the building on the other side of the compound, she contacts Jenkins, “Any sign of hostile threat, Corporal?”

“No hostile intent, Commander. However, I can make out three separate sniper’s nests across the ridge line overlooking the valley. The infrared readouts are all hot, Ma’am,” Jenkins reports, meaning all the nests are occupied. 

“Monitor from your position, Corporal. We don’t want to set them off, just in case, by showing up with a heavily armed tank at their doorsteps. Only show your teeth if provoked,” Reza instructs. Hearing a ‘roger that’ from Jenkins, they start walking keeping their hands free of weapons as a sign of peace. 

As they walk across the desolate ground to get to the facility across the compound, Joker clicks into his wife’s private channel to speak to her. “Hey, Rez? I’m really getting tired of watching Alenko stare at your ass.”

Choking slightly on Joker’s indignant tone, she asks, “What? He’s doing it right now?”

“Uh, yeah, he hasn’t stopped, since leaving the Mako.”

Shit. “Don’t worry, babe. I’ll think of something that will make him focus on the mission.”

Joker laughs, “Do you want me to warn him?”

“You do what you must, but I’m going to do something anyway.”

“Ok.” Joker says. As an afterthought, “You do have an amazing ass. I’m enjoying the view. I also enjoyed watching it grind against me, all night long,” he says huskily, lowering his voice so no one can hear him in the bridge. 

Reza groans remembering their time together the night before, “Thanks a lot, babe. I’m trying to set an example here for my subordinates to not get distracted during a mission. It’s hard to do that when I’m doing the same thing.”

“Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. Just make it up to me later.”

Joker laughs wickedly, “You know I’m more than a piece of meat, right?”

“Mmm, a very tasty piece of meat…which I can’t get enough of obviously, since we’ve demonstrated exactly why married couples don’t serve on the same ship today…twice,” Reza says grinning within her helmet and adds, “Not that I’m complaining.” Joker laughs huskily in her ear and she shivers, remembering how he got her off in their room before the mission, after she showered off the heavy bag remnants. He definitely knew how to use his voice, cheeky bastard, to get her so thoroughly distracted that she allowed him to talk her into a quickie and then some. Deciding it was her turn to have the last word, she adds, “Do not worry, husband mine, I can’t wait to grind into you again and again. I’ll demonstrate later tonight.”

Joker groans suddenly achingly hard. Thank goodness he is sitting at his station, no one the wiser. 

Reza smiles and then looks at Nihlus when he waves a hand in front of her helmet to get her attention. She looks at his visor and points at her ear indicating she was having a conversation. She holds up a hand and says to Joker, “I’m switching back to the squad channel now. We are about to go into the facility.” 

“Aye-aye, Commander, stay safe.” 

After they cycle through the airlock of the facility and take their helmets off, Joker grimaces as once again he sees that Kaidan can’t take his eyes off of his wife’s ass. He switches to Alenko’s private channel. 

“Enjoying the view, Alenko?”

“What?” Kaidan says distractedly as he tries to wrangle his helmet to fold flat so he can attach it to his armor and then shakes his head when both Nihlus and Reza look at him and frown before shrugging and looking away, flattening their own helmets. 

“The Commander has a nice ass, don’t you think?”

Kaidan turns red and stammers finally able to clip the helmet to his armor, “Uh…I didn’t know your link was visual as well as audio through our suit feeds.”

“Obviously…What, you don’t agree?” Joker says rolling his eyes. 

“Well, yeah. It’s hard not to stare. She’s right in front of me.” Kaidan says quietly covering his camera lens on his hardsuit and lowering his voice, so as not to be overheard by his squad mates as they prepare to enter the building. 

“I’m sure she would be flattered at knowing you think that. However, I think you may want to pay attention because you are about to…” a big crash as a large armored body hits a solid metal door.

Joker laughs out loud, guffawing at his friend who just face planted into the door in front of him, since he wasn’t paying enough attention to his surroundings before it closed. He switches to the squad channel to hear what the others were saying.

Reza had picked up what the Lt. was distracted with once they entered the facility, noting where his eyes landed and Nihlus wasn’t making it any easier since he couldn’t stop chuckling at their predicament. So, she did the only thing she could think of to focus her squad mate on the task at hand. As she passed through the interior door seal, she quickly nudged the door closure, and low and behold a large crash sounded from the opposite side. Waiting a bit, she tried to keep a straight face and turned around to open the door again to see the Turian bent over laughing his ass off and her Lt leaning against the doorjamb shaking his head as if to clear it from knocking face first into the door. She also had a highly amused husband laughing in her ear.

“Are you okay, Lt?”

“Huh?” he says through the ringing of his ears. 

Reza’s lips twitch wanting to also laugh at the situation, but she restrains herself because they have a job to do and an example to set….She glares at Nihlus as he can’t stop laughing and stands in front of Kaidan. “Lt, I need you to focus. We are here to negotiate with a possible unstable ex-marine, who I know personally, and I need my head of marine detail and highly powerful biotic squad mate to be focused on the mission. Do you understand?”

Kaidan shakes the fog out of his mind and blinks at his XO, confused for a second thinking hard on what she is saying, and then nods in understanding. Rubbing his head where it hit the door, he grimaces and says, “Aye-aye, Ma’am. I’m sorry for getting distracted.”

Gesturing at the finally calm Turian to check out the next room, she waits until he leaves to talk to the Lt. She motions to Kaidan to switch his comm unit off, so she can speak to him privately. She motions the same but doesn’t actually turn hers off, and switches to her private channel so Joker can listen in, so as not to make her husband jealous. Once done, she looks at a very flustered and embarrassed Lt in front of her and sighs. “I’m sorry I had to do that to you, Kaidan. I hope that you don’t get a migraine from my hasty solution to your distraction.”

“I deserved it, Ma’am.”

“No one deserves to get a painful reminder for a slip of concentration. Just be glad it was a bump on the noggin and not a bullet hole. Besides, in other circumstances, I might have been flattered.”

Kaidan looks at her in surprise and nods, eyes lighting up as he tries to covertly look her up and down.

Joker chokes in her ear. 

“I said I ‘might’ be, Lt. Don’t push your luck. Just try not to be so thoroughly distracted again during a mission, ok?”

Kaidan straightens up and nods in assent, flushing with embarrassment at making such a rookie mistake. What the hell? He is a seasoned marine. 

“I know I can’t completely forbid you from looking, but try to be discrete at least,” she says winking at him, making Joker groan in her ear, since she basically just gave permission to Alenko to look at her ass, just not to be so obvious about it. What she doesn’t know won’t hurt, is her thoughts on the matter. Asking him not to look, would be like asking Joker not to be a smartass. Not going to happen. Joker can groan all he wants, but that is not going to change the fact that she gets looks all the time from all sorts and most of the time, she just ignores them. At least this way, it’s out in the open and hopefully from now on, it won’t affect their missions and possibly get anyone hurt or worse, killed. 

Kaidan nods again, understanding. 

“See? I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.”

Alenko laughs, “Casablanca?”

“Have to enjoy the classics,” she says shrugging. Motioning for them to click their comm units back on, they join Nihlus at the entrance. “We are going to become the best of friends, Lt. Mark my words, eventually this incident today will make all of us laugh…at you…every time we remember it. Plus, some people may never let you live it down…just saying.” 

“You’re a cruel woman, Commander,” Kaidan says grinning at her.

“Yes, yes I am.” 

Joker snarks over the squad comm line, “I want a holo if there is a dent in the door.”

“Hardyharhar, Joker.”

Unbeknownst to the squad on the surface, the comm room is filled with laughter as Karin has grabbed onto David’s shoulder from not being able to stay standing up after laughing so hard. David doing the same thing, laughing at the gall of his goddaughter for straightening her Lt out for getting distracted, in the manner for which she is famous for. It’s never a dull moment…where his Reza is concerned. Her unconventional tactics are just the icing on the cake. Thank goodness, it seems that the Lt is okay with being the butt of her jokes. Hopefully the negotiation will end just as well. 

{{{}}}

“I’m used to getting glared at, but this is just creepy,” Reza mumbles into the comm as the three of them walk into the inner sanctum of the commune. The people gathering around them are all glaring daggers at them and a few of them are glowing blue with biotic energy, making her skin crawl. She’s tense already, but the additional static electricity in the room is starting to get to her already strained control. Knowing that any sign of aggression, biotic or not, would end badly for everyone, she clamps down doubly hard on her control to not retaliate in kind. Out of the corner of her eye, she sees Kaidan also twitching and she turns her head just enough to catch his eye and gives her head a firm shake, letting him know not to lose his as well. He nods in understanding. 

Turning her head to catch Nihlus’ eyes, she nods at him to precede them into the next room. He takes point and as soon as the door encloses them into a hallway, they all let out a sigh of relief as they can relax a little, being out of the limelight, so to speak. Looking at each of her squad mates to see if they are okay, she takes point again as they follow her life-signs detector to a room with only one occupant. She supposes that since Major Kyle, or rather ‘Father Kyle,’ is the leader, he would want his own room. 

As they turn the corner and enter the room in question, Reza pauses when she sees her old CO. He hasn’t changed much in the five years since Torfan. She looks him over, he still carries himself like a career military man and he seems physically the same. However, as he walks towards them and into the light, she sees that it’s the look in his eyes that has changed. What was once conviction and purpose has now been supplanted with madness. His eyes are hollow and sunken, haunted… She understands haunted, she has felt the same at times; however the amount of fanatical zeal within his eyes is troublesome. She sighs, seeing that his state of mind has clearly already gone to planet crazy land; she’ll have to appeal to something he cares about. That may be the only way to get him to surrender into her custody. Knowing within her heart that David is right, she really doesn’t have the charm to talk this madman into giving up, she determines that she may as well live up to the nickname this man knows her by. To win this day, she will have to be ruthless. That is the only way…Hopefully, it will work. 

The man she knows as Major Kyle has been sizing her and her squad mates up as she has made her own decision on how to proceed. He seems confused at first looking at her as if he can’t quite place her and then suddenly something seems to click and he scowls at her, “I know you. ‘The Butcher of Torfan.’ Why have you come here, Shepard? Why can’t you leave us alone?”

“What happened to those other Alliance officers? The ones who came before me?”

“They wanted to take me away from here! They wanted me to abandon this place. Turn my back on my family. They spoke blasphemy! I did what I could to make their end quick and painless. I had no other choice. It was necessary to protect my children. Only I can keep them safe.” Major Kyle says spittle dripping from his mouth as he starts to pace and wave his arms in the air. 

Joker says over the comm line, “He’s cuckoo. Blasphemy, my ass!”

Silently agreeing with her husband, she needs to try to make Major Kyle understand the enormity of the situation he has not only put upon his people, but on her as well. The Alliance doesn’t just send her to keep the peace, she’s sent when they have no other choice and she is their last resort before things get ugly and bombardment from orbit is the answer. Walking a few steps forward to catch the Major’s attention, she says, “The Alliance sent me to bring you in, Major. Can’t you see this has gotten out of hand? Don’t you understand you’re endangering your followers?”

He stops pacing and looks at her his eyes wild, “I respect that you have come under a banner of peace, Butcher, but I cannot do as you ask. If you take away their father, my children will be helpless.”

There, that is what he cares about. His followers are his children. He’s being protective or at least as far as he understands the word to mean. Reminding herself that she needs to be ruthless, she lowers her voice and exclaims in a deadly whisper, “If you don’t come with me, all your followers will end up dead. What kind of father lets his children die?”

The Major jerks and stares at her. Some clarity finally showing in his eyes, he looks around at his surroundings and finally notices that she and her squad mates are heavily armed. Looking scared, he exclaims, “No! This…this was my fault. My children are innocent. Pure. Please…I never meant for this to happen. I’m…I’m sorry…” Tears gather in his eyes and pour down his face. 

Seeing she got through to him, she’s grateful. However, this is not over. He needs to answer for his crimes. Looking at his tear streaked face, she says staying with her ruthless persona, “I don’t want an apology. You have to come with me, Major.”

Looking desperate, he wheedles, “Wait. If my children see you taking me away, they won’t understand. They will attack and you will be forced to kill them all. You have shown me the error of my ways, Commander. Now you must give me time to explain it to them. It is the only way they will understand. Please, give me one hour. After that, I will meet the Alliance authorities at the gates of my compound and surrender without violence. I give you my word as an ex-Alliance officer.”

Seeing a glimmer of the man she once knew and was proud to serve under, she says dropping her ruthless demeanor, “I’m going to trust you. If you betray that trust, you and all your children will suffer. Do you understand, Major?”

He nods emphatically, “I will not betray you, Commander,” he says, his voice cracking. “Thank you for this. For giving me time.”

Reza nods at him, “We will go make arrangements for your pick up and will meet you out front in one hour, Major.”

He nods and walks over to a desk and picks up a strange instrument and starts strumming it. Soon, people start pouring into his room and with one gesture from the Major, the people part down the middle to let her and her team walk through them out to the outer chamber and back to the entrance.

Looking back bewildered, Reza shakes herself and says in the comm link, “Joker, can you contact the Fifth Fleet and tell them to pick the Major up. In the meantime, land at our location and we’ll load the Mako.”

“Roger that,” Joker says as he follows orders. Getting confirmation that an Alliance frigate is on the way, he relays that information to the ground team.

Nodding, Reza looks at her squad mates and notes that Kaidan looks troubled and Nihlus looks impressed, “What?” she asks them quietly as she herself is surprised at how this situation had turned out. So many ways this mission could have ended and she would have never guessed that it would end without a single shot fired. Will wonders never cease? 

“I just hope you know what you’re doing, Commander,” Kaidan says worried over the turn of events.

Looking at him thoughtfully, she says, “To be honest, Lt, so am I.”

“Really?” Kaidan says surprised that she would say that. 

“Yeah…” Looking back at the entrance to the sanctuary, remembering the past, “I knew the Major during a trying time, Lt. Torfan wasn’t a picnic. Without my family, I may have turned out just like him, after what I had to do. I didn’t earn my nickname for just any reason…” she says as she looks at him hard trying to convey what she had endured in one look. He nods gulping at the pain he sees in her eyes. “I can understand some of the emotions I saw in him. I know what it feels like…let’s just leave at that.”

Putting a hand on her shoulder, trying to reassure her, Kaidan says quietly, “He was mad, Commander, crazy even. Are you sure that he will live up to his word…?”

Pulling away from him, she looks at him with conviction of her own, “Yes. I believe him. He became clear at the end. I know him to stay true to his word. He knows the consequence of what will happen. No one crosses me, Kaidan. That’s the true power of a nickname, be it good or bad. Sometimes, you have to use it.” Turning away from him, she walks into the airlock and starts readying her helmet. “Come on, you two; let’s get back to the Mako. We have a report to write.”

Shit. Feeling bewildered and slightly bereft, Kaidan wonders if he just ruined his budding friendship with his XO, by challenging her orders to give the Major one hour to comply with her demands. The comradeship they all portrayed earlier is long gone. Not knowing how to proceed other than to follow her orders, he follows her into the airlock with Nihlus and prepares his helmet. Maybe the vacuum of Presrop, will help him come to terms with his roiling emotions over what just happened and the possibility of losing a friend. 

{{{}}}

“Admiral Hackett, here. Your helmsman just sent in your interim report, Commander. Major Kyle has surrendered and his commune has been disbanded. To be honest, Shepard, I thought this was going to end in a bloodbath. I don’t know how you did it, but you saved a lot of lives.” 

Seeing that Reza is looking a bit rough around the edges, David speaks up before Reza can think of what to say to the Admiral, not to her father. “Major Kyle was able to see reason and decided that turning himself into the Alliance would save the people of his commune, Admiral. That showed that he still may be cognizant enough to get help. Please consider a mental health ward rather than jail time, once his trial is complete.”

“I’ll take that under advisement, Captain,” Steven says and nods at him. 

Looking over at Reza and how she is studying the floor rather intensely, he is about to say something, when Nihlus speaks up, “Admiral, your daughter needs time to compose her official report. Can we debrief tomorrow?”

Looking slightly affronted at being admonished for wanting to speak to his daughter, he glares at the Turian for interrupting him. When all Nihlus does is glare back, he nods, understanding that Nihlus, ever being Reza’s partner, is taking care of her. Straightening back into his Admiral persona, he says, “Understood Spectre. I will look forward to hearing from the both of you tomorrow. Commander…Captain,” he says acknowledging their salutes and closes the comm signal.

David turns towards his goddaughter and turns her to face him. He raises her face to his eye level. She blinks up at him and says, “David?”

He smiles and enfolds her into his arms. “You did good kid. I’m proud of you.”

Reza pauses in shock at the beginning of the hug and then settles, wrapping her arms around her godfather. Seeing Nihlus behind him, she nods at him, silently thanking him for speaking up for her. She wasn’t ready to face her father, yet. She knows what he did. He dispatched the Butcher at an impossible dilemma, knowing that should violence ensue, she would take care of it. He used her…her status, her experience, her past relationship with the man, her reputation…to end the conflict and either make him surrender or kill him for his crimes. He had put her in a situation where she was the judge, jury, and executioner of the Major’s fate…something that ‘one’ person should not do. 

“Captain…Commander, I will see you tomorrow. It has been a long day.” Nihlus nods to them and walks out of the comm room. 

Shutting her eyes, she leans into her godfather and lets her emotions overwhelm her for a minute. He soothes her as she silently cries out her anguish at being used by her own father and as she calms, he says, “What you did down there was magnificent, Rez. You played on his protective instincts and he caved. You showed real compassion. I guess you have charm after all,” David says smiling when Reza pulls out of his arms and looks up at him. 

Reza smiles sadly, “I was thinking the same thing as I was talking to him. I was thinking that you were right, I don’t have any charm. I only had my reputation to pull from. I used my ruthless persona to get the job done, David. It wasn’t pleasant. My only hope was that I could get through to him, and not have to kill him. I really didn’t want to…” she says whispering the last sentence. 

David wipes the tears from her face and kisses her forehead. “I know. I’m glad you didn’t have to. Why don’t you get something to eat and rest? Today has been a long day for all of us.”

Reza smiles for real this time. She hugs him, “Thank you.”

He nods and says, “I’ll send your husband down to join you as soon as I can tear him out of his chair. He’s more stubborn than you, remember?”

Feeling suddenly exhausted, she nods in agreement, “See you tomorrow,” and waves as she makes her way out of the comm room and down the stairs to the crew deck. Deciding she needs to decompress and relax a little, she decides to go to her room to await her husband and walks into the med bay to pass through to her quarters. 

As soon as she enters, she sees Lt. Alenko on one of the beds holding a palm in front of his eyes to shield the light from the corridor outside the med bay, so as not to affect his already precarious state. She quickly comes further into the room so the door closes and walks towards him. 

Seeing who had entered the med bay after his eyes readjusted to the low lighting, he winces and says, “Commander,” as he watches her walk over to him.

“You okay, LT?”

“Not really. Head versus door doesn’t really work well. Even a hard head like mine…” Kaidan says softly trying not to move too much. 

Reza winces, “Sorry about that…I wasn’t thinking about your head…I should have been more careful.”

“You were right, Commander. I was distracted and needed a reminder of what could happen…I’m just glad that it wasn’t a bullet. Don’t worry about me; I’ll be okay, eventually.”

Reaching out to soothe a stray hair from his coif, she pauses just before she touches him and retracts her hand. He watches her silently, his eyes widening when she went to touch him and when she retracts her hand without doing so, he sighs. She must still be mad at him. Wanting desperately to take back his words from earlier, he is about to say so, when she interrupts him.

“Kaidan, I’m sorry for lashing out at you earlier. You didn’t deserve that. I was just…upset. Not at you, just at the whole situation.”

Seeing her pain, he says, “I should be the one to apologize. What I said…it could be construed as second guessing your actions…I had no right. You obviously knew exactly what you were doing.”

Looking down on him and seeing the pain in his eyes, she walks away from him and goes to the sink, rummaging around until she finds a cloth and dampens it with cold water. She wrings out the excess by twisting the cloth and walks back over to him, seeing him watching her with interest. She says softly, “Close your eyes.” He does so, and she lays the cold cloth on his forehead and over his eyes, too. With hesitation, she leans over him and starts to knead his temples with her fingers. He grunts in pleasure at the soothing sensation of both; the cold cloth on his head and the kneading his XO is doing on his temples. He’s never felt anything so good before. Usually, in his current state, he can’t feel anything outside of the pain, but Reza has a way of surprising him. He knows that she is just trying to help him relieve his pain, but the fact that she cares enough to do this herself, maybe that means something else entirely. 

Noting that Kaidan has started to relax into her ministrations, she explains, “My mother used to get migraines. When I was a kid, I would lay cold cloths on her forehead over her eyes and do this on her temples. Don’t read anything into this, Kaidan, it is just a familial remedy that I picked up. It helps soothe the tension away. Her migraines were not bulkhead induced, but it worked nonetheless,” she laughs slightly at her joke.

Kaidan says groaning, “So, the teasing has started…has it?”

“Nah, this was a freebie.” Reza finishes her kneading on his temples and after checking the cloth, she says, “Keep your eyes closed, I’m going to refresh the cloth.” At his grunt of assent, she lifts it off his head and repeats the gesture. After returning to Kaidan, she lays it back onto him. Looking at him, she finally replies to his statement from earlier, “You don’t need to apologize, Kaidan. We might be well suited as far as our combat styles go, but I think our personalities will need time to mesh better. You seem to follow the rule book to the letter. I should warn you, I don’t. Maybe pairing us up, was a good thing. I need someone who can call me on my bullshit. I tend to take the renegade route, Kaidan. You seem to be a paragon of virtue. I need that type of feedback and constructive criticism on my team. Be warned, I may not appreciate it at times and I might yell at you, but overall, I think you will be a great asset and help me stay true to the cause, the mission, and what we are doing out here. What do you think? Will you be that person?”

Kaidan hesitates, he had listened to his XO say he was virtuous and followed the book. It was true, sure, but there were days when he wanted to be a renegade. It seemed that they really were friends and not only would he be able to help her but maybe she would be able to help him in return. Knowing he wasn’t ready to move yet, he stuck out his hand in the air, not seeing where she is standing next to him, and when she grabs it and shakes his hand, he says, “I would be honored, Commander.”

Reza laughs, “Don’t be a fanboy, Kaidan. I don’t have any use for someone lighting candles and making shrines for me. I definitely don’t deserve one after Torfan.”

“That wasn’t what I meant, Commander. Besides, if you were to ask, I have no idea what you are talking about…” Kaidan smiles.

Reza laughs again, pausing before trying to pinch him or nudge his shoulder for his teasing. Not knowing if either gesture would jostle him too much, she huffs irritated, “This is not fair, I can’t retaliate when you are feeling this way.”

“That’s why I’m taking advantage now. I definitely can’t win against the great Commander Shepard.”

“Harhar…you are so gonna get it, Lt.”

Kaidan chuckles at her. 

Reza looks at him and suddenly flips her head to stare at him. She snorts and laughs at her discovery backing up to lean against the next bed. 

Laughing at the sound she just made, Kaidan picks up the cloth from his face and turns one eye towards her to ask a little curious, “Did the great Commander Shepard just snort in laughter?”

“Pfft. Shut it, Lt,” Reza says laughing louder.

Feeling better after the shot the Doc gave him before leaving to grab dinner and the ministrations that his XO had done to him, he turns on his side to look at her, not feeling any additional pain. “What’s the joke, this time?”

Finally calming down, she bites her lower lip and pulls her legs up to sit on the side of the bed letting her legs dangle. She looks at him and says grinning, “I was just noticing that you have a great potato head.”

Kaidan frowns at her, slightly wincing at the movement, “Potato head…What?” he asks confused.

“Oh come on, Kaidan, when you were a kid, playing with friends…you know, cover half your face, sit upside down and talk…Potato head. Get it?”

Kaidan purses his lips and thinks about what she said. Potato head? Oh! He starts laughing, “Seriously, Shepard…potato head? What are you five?”

“What!?!” she turns red and looks away, “I couldn’t help it. You have the perfect chin, for a potato head. Just deal with it.”

Kaidan looks at her and just laughs…what a beautiful, crazy, badass, stubborn, moron...Shaking his head at the wonder that is his friend, he continues to chuckle at her. She glares and sticks her tongue out at him. He gapes at her and then starts another round of chuckling. 

Reza mock glares at her friend and decides that, yeah, the potato head thing was pretty infantile, but it made him feel better. Her too…actually…she starts to laugh with him. After another few minutes of laughing, she calms and looks at her friend, “Feeling better, now?”

Kaidan sits up slowly and dangles his legs off the bed mirroring her, and rolls his head from side to side, “Yeah. I guess I am.”

“Sometimes laughter is the best medicine,” she says before jumping off the bed to stand in front of him. “Hungry?”

He gingerly lets himself down off the bed and leans against it, “Yeah, I could eat.”

“Give me a second and I’ll join you,” Reza says as she backs away and walks towards her quarters. She needs to drop off the energy bars she purchased for the tour. This was as good a time as any and enters her quarters to grab them from her duffle. 

Kaidan watches her walk towards the back room and blinks when she steps through the doorway and briefly sees a bed on the far wall, before the door slides shut. Ah, so that is where she sleeps. He saw Nihlus leave the designated XO quarters this morning and wondered briefly if Reza and Nihlus were more than just partners. He had tried to shake the thought from his mind, since it hurt just thinking about it, but it had been bothering him, especially not knowing if her quarters had been moved or not. Knowing now, that she was staying in the store room in the back of the med bay, he suddenly felt much better. He just may have a chance yet, especially after their recent encounter. Although, she did say not to read anything into her touching him, well…it couldn’t be helped. His imagination was already running wild. Though, the bulkhead incident is still foremost in his mind, ugh, it did prove one thing, he just can’t let his thoughts distract him or make it obvious to her. He can very easily crush on her in private. Or, at least, he will try. However, as soon as she gives any indication that she wants to take their friendship to another level, then the rules he so steadfastly follows…well…fuck them. He would be the luckiest bastard in the galaxy and he would gladly follow her lead by breaking them.

{{{}}}

After waiting nearly twenty minutes for his wife to leave their quarters, thinking she probably needed some alone time, Joker was just about to get up and join her, when he sees her leave the med bay and was immediately followed by Alenko. Seeing them smile at each other and laugh at something she says, Joker settles back into his chair and grumbles at being a moron for not following his instincts earlier and just joining her. He knows the pain and anguish she must be feeling after the mission today, but knew with experience, that sometimes she needed to work things out in her head first, before turning to him. Fuck, there’s that jealousy again. So, Rez and Alenko are becoming friends. Big deal! It’s not as if he has anything to worry about, right? Rez clearly punished Alenko enough today with the door incident. Clearly he won’t pursue her after that embarrassing moment, right? Idiot! Of course, he will. She’s Commander fucking Shepard. Any idiot would pursue her no matter what…Shit shit shit. Glowering at the table trying to work out his anger at the situation, he startles suddenly and looks up when Kaidan sits across from him and Reza plops onto the seat next to him. They start to eat as he tries to think of what to say. 

Seeing anguish and possibly jealousy flash across her husband’s eyes, she says trying to lighten the mood, “What’s happenin, hot stuff…?”

Kaidan looks up at Reza surprised at hearing her use a pick up line on Joker.

Joker laughs and looks down, his ears reddening, “That line didn’t work on me after the Blitz and it won’t work on me, now.”

“Eh, was just checking to see if you remembered.”

Joker looks at her and laughs, “You and your old movie pickup lines…let me guess; 1980’s, right?”

“Warm…”

“Hmm,” Joker thinks about what movies she likes from that era and says, “Top Gun?”

“Getting colder…but great movie…”

Kaidan powers up his omni-tool to check the reference, and jumps when a piece of bread is thrown at him from across the table. Looking at the splat of what constituted as butter from where the bread hit his arm, he stares at his XO when she sniggers at him. Raising an eyebrow questioning her motives, she grins and says, “No cheating.”

Picking up the bread from the table, he gives it back to her and powers down his omni-tool. She winks at him and nudges Joker’s shoulder to keep him guessing. 

Watching them with narrowed eyes, he asks his friend, “Not an old movie buff, Alenko?”

Kaidan laughs, “Yes. I like movies. But, mostly old classics, from the mid-twentieth century, like the reference Shepard said earlier today; Casablanca.”

Joker yawns into his hand, “How boring…”

Reza pinches his side making him yelp and glare at her, “Are you giving up, flyboy?”

Joker narrows his eyes at her and blurts out, “It’s a John Hughes film, isn’t it?”

“Warmer…”

Kaidan says, “John Hughes film? Oh, I remember those. He made one of my favorites; um…what is it…uh…”

“Shut it, Alenko. This is my game…if I win; I get to buy Shepard a drink and a dance, next time we’re on shore leave.”

“Buy the Commander a drink…?” Kaidan repeats shocked, knowing that a drink and a dance pretty much constitutes a date.

Joker glowers at him and Kaidan glowers back. Seeing the tension, Reza starts to laugh, “Come on guys, we are all friends here. You have to remember, Kaidan, that I’ve known Joker a long time and we’re friends. He’s bought me a few drinks over the years…” 

“So that pick-up line that you used was really…a pick-up line?”

Reza looks at Jeff and winks at him. “Yeah…it was at the time. He rejected me.”

“What!?!” Kaidan says spluttering in surprise as he gapes at his friend. 

Joker looks at Reza next to him and blatantly looks her up and down, “Eh, she wasn’t my type. You know; war-hero, goody two shoes, savior of Elysium, nice, beautiful, stubborn, badass, likes to play with sniper rifles, biotic extraordinaire…Meh,” he shrugs. “Pfft, she even has a Star of Terra, can’t be a real chick, has to be stuck up, egomaniacal…you know the type.”

Kaidan splutters and looks at him as if he cracked in the head.

Joker laughs and winks at Reza when she shakes her head at him and finishes her meal, “Clearly, I was an idiot.”

Kaidan says, “You think?”

Joker frowns, “Yeah, I lost my chance…but, overall, my stupidity gained me one thing, a best friend. And, she really is nice, because we play this quoting game and if I guess correctly, she humors me and I get to buy her a drink. Speaking of which…”

Reza looks up expectantly.

“The Breakfast Club…”

“Oooh, very warm,” she says making his eyes light up and then he pouts when she adds, “But not correct.”

“That was the movie I was thinking about. Great movie…” Kaidan says smiling at Rez.

She nods in agreement and yawns suddenly, covering her mouth with her hand. “Well, next time, Joker. I got to make like a tree and get outta here…” she says standing up and picking up her tray to walk it back over to the counter. Walking back, she laughs at Joker’s facial expression. 

Frustrated at not being able to guess correctly, he frowns at her, “Another one, Shepard? I haven’t even guessed the first quote.”

Flicking his nose, making him grimace and pull away, she laughs and says walking away, “Keep trying…”

Kaidan looks up at her and says, “I know this one.” 

Reza pauses and turns back around and raises an eyebrow, “Oh?”

“Will I be able to buy you a drink and a dance as well, if I get it right?” Kaidan asks his heart in his throat, waiting for her answer.

Joker chokes drawing Kaidan’s attention away from her and she takes advantage and covertly looks at her husband, seeing he is getting annoyed. She mouths a silent ‘sorry’ and says to Kaidan, “A drink, sure. A dance…not sure that would be appropriate, Lt. Not while I’m your XO, anyway.”

Kaidan swallows the lump in his throat and nods at her understanding what she is saying. As his superior officer, she is off limits, as the frat regs go. But, afterward, well…then they don’t apply. He watches her wave to them and walks off toward the med bay and disappears through the doors. Smiling at possible future prospects, he turns around and looks back at a very annoyed Joker and says, “What? You said you rejected her.”

Joker looks at his soon to be ex-friend and glowers at him. He may have rejected her at the time, but then they became the best of friends. That was true enough, but what they didn’t tell him was much later, they turned their friendship into much more than that and now were happily married. Fuck. This was the crappy bit of their marriage, where he couldn’t tell would be suitors to ‘fuck off.’ Fine… he pulls his crutches out from under his chair and stands up and holds out his hand to Kaidan, “May the best man win.” He’s willing to play this game, knowing he’s already won. 

Kaidan looks at his hand and shakes it, smiling at him, accepting the challenge. 

Suddenly feeling like shit, he crutches off to the men’s room, thinking he should at least get ready for bed before following his wife discretely into their shared quarters. After taking a shower and getting dressed again, he sits on the bench and sighs. Still feeling a sickening weight in his gut, he swears, Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Because of the stupid marriage pact to not tell anyone about him and Reza, he now has to hurt his friend. 

{{{}}}

“Why did you have to encourage him, Rez?”

“I didn’t mean to, babe. Besides, I’m going to bring him into our confidence, soon. I need a friend on the ground who I can confide in, who I can trust my life, too. I believe he can do that. Before the next shore leave, I will tell him. Are you okay with that, too? I don’t want this ‘game’ to ruin your friendship with Kaidan.”

Not sure yet whether the ‘game’ has ruined his friendship yet or not, Joker finally nods and says, “Yes. I get it. Sure, having someone we can both trust with the truth would be nice, and I will thoroughly enjoy not being jealous every time I see the two of you together."

Reza looks at her husband as he sits on the edge of their bed, running his fingers agitatedly through his hair. She sits next to him, “Are you mad at me?”

Looking at her, “No babe, I knew marrying you would lead me down the jealous trail at times, but as I told you last night, you are worth it. Please, ignore my stupid traits. I do realize that I’m a lucky bastard and though I probably don’t deserve you, I do love you and I’m yours for as long as you want me.”

Reza leans into him and nips his bottom lip with her teeth, “It’s me who doesn’t deserve you. You’re not getting away from me that easily. You and I are forever, my love,” she says brushing her hand against his beard looking into his eyes, "I can’t live without you. You know that.” He nods at her, his heart in his eyes. Leaning in to kiss him sweetly, she smirks at him, “Now, get naked…babe, I want to show you just how much I love you. Always and forever.”

Smiling at her, he stands and takes off his shirt, trousers, and his braces. He pauses from removing his boxers, when he notices that his wife has moved to lean against the locked door of their quarters as she stares at him as he undresses, but doesn’t join in. He looks at her expectantly.

Leering at him, she raises an eyebrow and looks at his boxers questioningly.

Waving at her clothed body, he says, “You only get the goods when you join in, babe.”

She shakes her head and says, “What’s the movie reference? I know you know it.”

Taken aback from her question, he sits on the bed and looks at her and frowns thinking about which movie she was referring to, “Uh…Oh! It’s Sixteen Candles, isn’t it?”

She smiles and nods, lowering herself to all fours and crawls over to him and says provocatively as she parks herself in between his legs, “You owe me a drink, babe.” 

Sitting up, he looks down at his smug wife and brushes a hand down her cheek and leans into her to kiss her lips briefly before pulling away. 

Moaning at the loss of his lips she pushes him gently to lay back onto the bed beneath him and helps him slide his boxers off. He groans when she slowly licks and sucks her way down his body until she takes his hardened cock into her hot mouth. Grasping onto the sheets at the overwhelming feeling of her mouth on him he gasps her name as she proceeds to show him just how much she loves him with her mouth and hands until he can’t take it anymore. With a loud, ‘AHHHHH’ he orgasms into her mouth and she drinks him down, lapping up every last drop, loving the taste of him. Savoring the high a moment before relaxing into the bed, completely replete, Joker turns to look at his wife as she stands up.

“Umph…babe…you are wearing way too many clothes…take ‘em off.”

Licking her lips, she shakes her head at him, “Not yet.”

Frowning, Joker finally moves his relaxed body and leans up against the pillows at the head of their bed before arranging the covers to drape across his waist, covering himself from her view. He smirks at his wife when she groans in disappointment. As he is about to ask his wife to join him again, he pauses when he sees her fiddle with her omni-tool. “What…?” 

Reza puts out a hand and says, “Thank you for the drink, babe, but now I want to have that dance.”

Joker reddens at the reference to the drink but jumps when he starts to hear a song start to play over their internal comm line, the one they are only able to hear since it was routed in from her omni-tool. He instantly recognizes the song as one she likes to play when she is feeling rather frisky. It’s ‘Yeah!’ by Usher. He smiles and shakes his head…his Rez and her love for music of that era. 

“Joker,” she says sweetly, distracting him from his thoughts of her music preference. 

“Hmm?” He says looking at her and goggling a bit, when she starts to dance in front of him and strips off her shirt and trousers, already barefoot.

“Pay attention.”

Instantly reading into her dance reference, his cock hardens instantly as he gapes at his wife as she teasingly dances like an Asari dancer while stripping off the rest of her clothes. He groans and strokes himself as he watches his wife play with herself like she did that morning, only with the intent and purpose in her eyes of one goal, to make him moan and beg her to come closer, which he does, not being able to tear his eyes away from her gyrating naked body. 

She crawls over to him once she uncovers his aching hardness, ready for her again, and straddles his lap. Pausing, she pushes her breasts into his face as she stretches her arms over her head to release her bun to let her hair fall around her shoulders. 

Awakening from his lust filled stupor, Joker takes advantage and fondles her breasts, licking and suckling on her nipples as she starts to grind down on him with her hips, keeping to the beat of the song. Gasping his name as he bites down slightly, further hastening her passion for the man between her legs, she moans and lifts herself up to slide his aching cock within her until he hilts, making him one with her. Moaning at seeing the pure pleasure of being within her hot core on his face, knowing he is feeling the same as she, she leans into him and kisses him until they are both breathless. 

Biting on her lip, she begins to fuck him senseless as gently as she can without breaking him, feeling the music pulse through her, added with the sensations they are experiencing together, she closes her eyes and enjoys this perfect moment. Leaning back onto her hands, she changes the angle, so he hits that sensitive spot deep within her with every thrust. She gasps as he grabs her ass to guide her movements over him and meets her thrust for thrust moaning in pleasure. Leaning forward as she grinds herself into him, Joker nips her clavicle, making her gasp and buck into him as that added bit of pain makes her lose control and orgasm around him. Feeling her inner walls squeeze his shaft, he almost loses it as well, but just holds it off wanting to give her another release first. He trails his hand down her torso and slips a finger into her warmth and starts playing with her clit and they resume their dance. “Come for me again, babe. I want to feel you shudder around me. I want to make you see stars...I love you…” Joker chokes out just as he loses himself within her at the same time Reza orgasms again; this time letting her biotic energy flow into him, making him come instantly at the sheer ecstasy that flashes between them. 

Afterward, they lay together their limbs entwined, basking in their love for each other, enjoying this perfect moment between them. 

Playing with the ends of her hair, Joker kisses his wife’s forehead and says, “Best drink and dance date ever, babe.”

Reza smiles at the wonderful man in her arms and cups his cheek with her hand to pull his head down to kiss his lips, mumbling ‘love you’ before pulling back to snuggle back into his arms and lays her head back upon his chest, getting comfortable. Just before drifting off to sleep, she agrees with her husband, best drink and dance ever…indeed. She does have to have a few secrets from her husband. Plus, she never did specify exactly what type of drink or dance they were playing for. Either way, she always pays her debts and so does he.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: The flight simulation story was inspired by the impossible to pass, Kobayashi Maru test in Star Trek, with my own ME twist, of course. My version is not impossible but highly improbable to get a perfect score or two, as this chapter explains.
> 
> ~John Hughes, one of the greatest film makers, may he rest in peace.  
> ~'What’s happenin, hot stuff?' Sixteen Candles…one of the best 80’s movies, ever.  
> ~'Make like a tree and get outta here…' Uh duh, Back to the Future.  
> ~The song ‘Yeah!’ by Usher, is one of the best let’s have sex songs…couldn’t help using it.


	7. AMF

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thanks for all the kudos and comments. 
> 
> This chapter was going to be twice as long, but I realized that it might be better to split it into two. I have a little bit more to go before posting the next chapter but it will be sooner rather than later. Enjoy!

Reza whimpers in her sleep. It may have been five years since Torfan, but there were nights when her overactive imagination just wouldn’t let her forget what occurred that day. The nights when these nightmares happened, they weren’t even dissuaded by the rapturous moments leading up to sleep between her and her husband, who always tried to help her forget her nightmares…several times, if needed. This night was no exception; however, it seemed that she just wasn’t of a mind to wake up to distract herself. Crying out, Reza moans as she remembers the horrors of that day; the images of her squad as they died trying to take out every last one of the Batarian bastards they were sent to kill. 

Joker awakens when he hears his wife cry in her sleep. Being careful not to jar her awake, not wanting to make her instincts kick in and possibly come away from comforting his wife with a cracked rib or broken arm, he soothes her by gently sliding his body against hers to warm her shivering body with his. He hums to her and wraps his arms around her waist, burying his face into her neck. She jerks but doesn’t react, only turns in his arms and snuggles up to him, crying into his chest. Joker whispers, “Babe, you awake?”

“Nngphff,” she mumbles. 

“You okay? Do you want to talk about it?” He asks knowing that she will say no. He has never been able to get her to talk about Torfan. Her other missions of Elysium and Akuze…yes…but not the mission where she got her nickname, ‘The Butcher of Torfan.’ He thinks that maybe she’s not so proud of her actions on that mission, not that she had any choice. 

Nuzzling into his warmth, she whispers, “No.” 

Kissing the top of her head, he says, “Go back to sleep, babe. I’m right here, I’ll protect you.”

“Love you,” Reza mumbles as she continues to silently grieve for the loss of her squad.

Twenty minutes later and finally able to calm down, Reza relishes the feeling of her husband’s arms around her, but she cannot go back to sleep. Waiting until Joker’s breath evens out and he relaxes his hold on her as he drifts back to sleep, she gently rolls out of bed and stares down at him. Smiling at him when he turns over and starts quietly snoring, she wonders how she got so lucky to have such a man as he. He was always taking care of her when she needed him. 

Thinking she needs some tea or something hot to help soothe her, she walks to her duffle and rummages around to find her workout clothes; shorts and a tank top. Grabbing her N7 hoodie and bunny slippers, she slips her clothes on and makes her way out of their quarters not bothering to put her hair up. Stepping into the med bay and making her way out into the mess area, she relaxes when she finds it unoccupied. After looking through the cupboards in the kitchen and finding some tea, she brews some hot water and grabs a cup. Needing a little space, she sits at a table in the farthest seat against the bulkhead wall in the corner and sits down. Trying to get comfortable, she pulls her feet up against her and covers her legs with her overlarge hoodie so only her slippers show, and wraps her arms around herself to wait for her tea to steep. Shuddering at the images of her nightmare, she closes her eyes and tries to work through why her brain had decided to take the horror of Torfan and intermix it with both Elysium and Akuze. 

Still having intermittent pain from his migraine earlier, and not being able to sleep much, Kaidan takes a hot shower to clear his head. After changing into Alliance sweats, he wanders into the kitchen to grab something to eat and drink, thinking a few extra calories may help dissipate the last vestiges of his headache enough so he can get some shut eye. After making a sandwich and grabbing some water, he wanders over to the far table, so as not to be in any direct lighting. He pauses when he sees that the table is occupied and when he realizes that the person is his XO, he inwardly groans at the sight of her. Holy shit, she’s beautiful. He thought that the dress she arrived in when boarding the Normandy a few days ago was arousing, Rezana Shepard, sitting at the table in a hoodie and bunny slippers with her hair down around her shoulders and curling down her back, was a beautiful sight. This was more natural. The way she was dressed now, though he wasn’t sure exactly what she was wearing besides the hoodie draped around her, but she seemed comfortable. This is what she looked like when she woke up, he realizes to himself. Imagining waking up to see her like this, next to him, every morning, made him groan out loud. 

Hearing a noise, Reza opens her eyes and looks up at her Lt, standing at the edge of the table staring at her, hesitant to sit down. Smiling at him, she says, “Evening, or good morning Lt, depending on how you look at it. Take a seat. Don’t let me bother you,” she waves a hand at the table in front of her. 

Blushing at being caught staring, Kaidan sits down across from her, setting his plate and cup down in front of him. Settling in, he offers her half of his sandwich. She shakes her head and says no thank you. Starting to eat, he looks her over again and notices that even in the lowered lighting, her eyes seem haunted. “Are you okay, Commander?”

“You can call me Reza, when we aren’t on duty, Kaidan, if that’s alright with you. I’ve called you by your first name a few times, even while on duty. I should have asked if that was okay.”

“It is…I don’t mind…Reza.”

She smiles slightly at him, “Too answer your question, no, not really. Bad dreams…”

Kaidan takes a drink of his water and swallows another bite of sandwich. Nodding at her, he understands right away what may have given her the bad dreams. 

“The life of a soldier, I guess…latent images of past deeds. Do you get them, too?” Reza asks.

Shrugging, he says, “Sometimes.”

Reza nods. 

They sit in silence for a while. Finishing his sandwich, he pushes his plate aside and looks at her again as she drinks her tea. “I can leave, if you want.”

“No. I kind of like the company, if you don’t mind.” Reza says and then looks at the time on her omni-tool: 0215. “Uh…unless you need to get some rack time.”

“Couldn’t sleep…” pointing at his head, “Still a little sensitive.”

“Oh? Your head or your ego? Both took a beating today.”

Kaidan rolls his eyes at her, “Funny…Reza.”

She shrugs at grins at him, “Do you need something from the med bay? It’s deserted right now, but I know where the Doc keeps the good stuff.”

Laughing, Kaidan shakes his head, “Nah, I’m good. The sandwich helped.”

“Yeah, we biotics need the extra calories. I brought some great supplements and protein bars with me, should you need any calorie boosters while on missions. They’re the good stuff, not the Alliance cardboard you are used to.”

“I might take you up on your offer. I forgot to grab some at the commissary before leaving Arcturus. What flavors?”

“Oooooh, I got the good stuff; the normal Lemon Drop flavor, which is pretty decent, and the Coffee one, of course. But I got lucky and ordered the specialty flavors for my own personal use; Double chocolate chunk, Chocolate chip, Mint chocolate, Dark Ecstasy…wait…that one is mine. Hands-off.” She says seriously pointing at him. 

Kaidan gapes at her and then laughs, “I take it you like chocolate?”

“Hmm…why yes…I do believe that is an affirmative. Anything with chocolate or coffee and I’m head over heels for it.”

“Noted,” Kaidan says grinning. “So, what would you do if I accidentally had one of your Dark Ecstasy bars for a snack?”

Sitting up, Reza makes a small mnemonic with her hand and biotically lifts Kaidan’s water cup off the table and hovers it above his head, “I would apologize profusely before I have a slip in concentration and dump this over your head.”

Watching the cup hover, he says, “It will never happen again, I swear.”

Biting her lip, she says, “Take it quickly before I accidentally drop it…this control thing you have already mastered is harder for me.” Kaidan grabs his cup and Reza relaxes. “Thanks.”

Impressed, since during their practice session, she had mentioned that she didn’t have as fine control on her biotics as she would like, he says, “Not bad, Commander. That was impressive.”

“Call me Reza, remember?” At his nod, she says, “I’m surprised just as much as you. I truly thought that I was going to smash the damn cup mid-lift and splash us both.”

“I’m glad you didn’t. I already took my allotted showers for the day.”

Reza laughs.

Sneaking another look at her, he says, “Nice bunny slippers, by the way.”

Looking down and seeing her slippers peak out of her hoodie, she grins at him and shrugs, “Yeah, I thought they would go nicely with my N7 hoodie. Gives the ensemble a new fluffy look. What do you think; maybe I should make this a new trend?”

Imagining whole squads of N7 elite soldiers with pink bunny slippers marching in formation, Kaidan laughs out loud and shakes his head, “I think only you are brave enough to wear them.”

Biting her bottom lip, Reza laughs too. “You might be right. I had forgotten that I packed them. But, I’m glad I did, because they make me laugh…obviously. I really needed to, tonight. You can’t knock the power of pink fluffy bunny slippers.”

“Agreed.”

She smiles at him and takes another sip of her tea.

“So, do you want to talk about it? I find that sometimes talking about what keeps us awake can make us feel better. But, I would understand if that is too personal a question…” Kaidan says hesitantly.

Reza frowns. Joker asked her the same thing. The difference was she doesn’t want her actions of what happened on Torfan make Joker think any less of her. Not that he would, of course, but she doesn’t want to chance it. Maybe talking about it with someone else…someone she doesn’t have a personal relationship with…maybe that would help her. Or maybe she can just talk about some of it. Sighing, Reza looks over at Kaidan. He wouldn’t judge her too harshly, would he? Not knowing for sure, yet, she shakes her head. 

Kaidan was about to apologize for asking, when Reza surprises him by saying, “This last mission…it reminded me of Torfan. Well, it was more than that. It was the being used part that really got to me.”

“How so?”

“It pisses me off that I was asked to negotiate, because of my previous experience with Major Kyle. How is it that I was the last option for the Alliance? How fucked up is it that they can assume that I’ll take care of those things that they screw up? Good or bad. Let’s send in ‘The Butcher’ to get the job done and fuck the consequences, if things get violent.” Wiping a tear that strayed down her cheek, she looks up into Kaidan’s understanding eyes and adds, “You know what they forgot? During the trial, Major Kyle threatened me. He said that if he ever saw me again, he would kill me for doing what I had to do to get the job done, since he couldn’t. I had to take over because he royally fucked up and almost got all of us killed. Heh! And, they call me ‘The Butcher of Torfan,’” Reza blurts out. 

Kaidan reaches out and takes her hand clenched into a fist on the table and holds it with both of his. 

Wiping another stray tear, Reza tries to smile at him for giving her support. “The worst part of all of this is who asked me to take care of it. He more than anyone knew what I went through…” and pauses when she realizes that she said too much. Sitting up, she extricates her hand from Kaidan’s. Taking a big breath and clearing her throat, she says, “Anyway that was what was keeping me awake. It also was messing with my mind while sleeping. Images of Torfan were getting intermixed with Elysium and Akuze. You get the picture…” 

Missing the warmth of her hand, Kaidan asks in confusion, “Who asked you?”

Wrapping her arms around herself and hunching down into her chair, Reza bites her lower lip. Can she trust him? She thinks so…looking him over and seeing something in his expression, she says, “Can I trust you, Kaidan?”

“Of course.”

Seeing him looked a little affronted at being asked if she can trust him, she explains, “I’m not trying to insult you, Kaidan, it’s just only a few people know what I’m about to tell you and it's a big secret. Knowing that…if you want to back out now, I won’t think any less of you.”

Kaidan frowns, what could she possibly say that would be such a big deal for him to not want to be on the short list of those she trusts. Whatever it is, he would feel honored to be one of those people. Someone she can turn to…to talk to, like she just did. Obviously, what she just revealed about Torfan, wasn’t something she told just anyone. “Reza, not to sound like a fanboy, but I would be honored to be someone you can trust…to call a friend. I don’t just let anyone shut a door in my face or almost drop a cup of water on me…” he says smirking at her.

Laughing a bit from his pun, since truly he had no choice from those actions…she would have done them regardless, nodding at him, she says, “I was just trying to give you an out, just in case…”

He nods at her in return, understanding now why she was being cautious.

“Okay…here we go. You know about my relationship with the Captain, right?”

Kaidan narrows his eyes at her and suspiciously looks over at the CO’s quarters and back to her and shakes his head. Wait…she’s not hinting that she and the Captain are…he winces.

Reza puts up a hand and laughs, “No, Kaidan. I’ll stop you right there…not that type of relationship. Eww. He’s old enough to be my father.”

“Okay…that is a relief to hear...”

Reza laughs, “I’m sure David would be flattered though…but seriously, yuck.”

Kaidan looks at her expectantly.

“Right…joke aside, the Captain is my godfather.”

Eyebrows raised in surprise, Kaidan whistles. 

“If you think that’s impressive, just wait. How David came to be my godfather? Well, he’s best friends with my Dad. They went through ICT training together and served on the same ships for years. I also know Karin or Doctor Chakwas to you. She practically raised me when I lived with my father onboard his ships. My mother was always off on classified missions. I don’t see her often. Anyway…this too much information yet?”

“Nope.”

“Good, because here’s the fun part. My last name is not Shepard…not really.”

“Huh?” Kaidan says confused at this last bit of information.

Deciding that it’s still not time to reveal that she’s married, leaving that story for another rainy day…she smiles at him. “Nope. It’s my mother’s maiden name.”

Blinking at her in confusion, but ready to hear the punchline, Kaidan says, “I’m ready…hit me with it.”

“It’s Hackett.”

Coughing, Kaidan wheezes out, “As in Admiral Hackett?”

Smiling, Reza says, “You got it.”

“Holy Shit!” Kaidan states as he lays his head down on his arms on the table. 

Reza laughs at his reaction. Yeah, that is why she doesn’t walk around with that last name anymore. Of course, she has made the name Shepard just as legendary, both good and bad, but not as widely known as ‘Hackett.’ Deciding to distract him, she leans across the table and puts her hand out, “Rezana Hackett, nice to meet you.”

Looking up at her smiling at him with her hand stretched out, he sits up and takes her hand and shakes it.  
Reza says cheekily after releasing his hand, “I tried to warn you.”

Nodding, he says, “You did. But, I’m glad you told me. It makes much more sense now, why you are pissed off. I’m sorry that you had to go through that with your father.”

Grimacing, Reza sighs, “I’m sure he’s probably aware by now that I’m upset with him. He’s tried several times to contact me since our debriefing. Nihlus helped by delaying my final report till tomorrow, but…I’ll have to face him eventually.”

“Nihlus seems like a good friend. Have you worked with him long?”

“Yeah, he is a curious Turian. I was paired up with him almost ten months ago. I’m not sure why a Spectre would be interested in partnering up with a renegade Lt. Commander in the Alliance, but I’ve made things interesting for him. If anything, I get to tease him incessantly. That by itself is worth the time together.”

Kaidan laughs, “Yeah, I have a feeling that getting teased by you is something I need to get used to. But, be warned, Reza, I can dish it out, too.”

“Ooh, I hear a challenge coming on…” she says smirking at him.

Kaidan laughs and shakes his head. Life since meeting the Commander…no Reza, has been quite the adventure. “So, uh…I can understand why you took your mother’s maiden name…your father is a legend, but why do you keep such a tight control over people knowing?”

Reza purses her lips and looks at him, “Some of the reason is so that people don’t think that my father plays favorites with me as his daughter. You know, me getting the fancy assignments…what not.”

Kaidan shakes his head, “Yeah, like Akuze and Torfan were cozy assignments. And, since Elysium was just right place right time, I think you have made your own waves within the Alliance, Commander…uh Reza,” he says after getting the stink eye from her when he slipped up and used her rank again.

“Ha! You might be one of the only ones to call Elysium, right place right time. Most people think the opposite. Truly, the reason why I go by ‘Shepard’ is because it’s a more common last name and not many have served with my mother, who also uses her maiden name. It’s mostly because of who my family’s enemies are. Sure, I’ve made a few, but with all the varied assignments we’ve had among us over the years, it’s easier to keep everything separate. Let’s just say that if not for an old friend of my mother’s, the Blue Suns would be gunning for me just to piss off my father. Kill the daughter of one of the most famous officers in the Alliance fleet? Sure.”

Kaidan scoffs, “Not that you would just roll over and let someone hurt you or anyone you cared about…you are an extremely powerful biotic, Reza, and an N7 trained elite operative. You can take care of yourself. You wouldn’t make it easy on anyone deciding to make your family a target. I already know that about you and I just met you a couple of days ago.”

“True. But, our enemies are quite formidable. But it is always nice to have lots of badass friends like you and others I met along the way.” 

Kaidan blushes at the complement, “Thanks.” Looking thoughtful, he asks her a question that he’s been curious about all day since sparring with her. “By the way, how did you break out of the Stasis field I put you in? It was on full strength.”

Reza purses her lips and smirks at him, “Hmm, a girl has to have a few tricks up her sleeves. That one has saved my life a few times.”

Kaidan narrows his eyes at her, “You didn’t answer the question.”

“I didn’t, did I?” Reza says, and laughs when he shakes his head in irritation. Smirking at him, knowing her answer would only annoy him further, she says, “Guess.”

“Really?” 

“Work it out for yourself, Kaidan. You’re a smart guy with lots of biotic knowledge, based on your impressive control. What would you surmise as being the reasoning behind such a fete?”

“I’ll think about it and get back to you.”

Reza laughs at him, “Ok. Just remember, once you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.”

Looking at her suspiciously, “Where have I heard that before? It’s a movie, isn’t it?”

Shrugging, Reza smirks, “Maybe.”

Raising an eyebrow at her for introducing the quoting game back into their conversation, Kaidan takes his queue and says, “You mentioned that if I get a quote right, I can buy you a drink. Is that still possible, Reza?”

Reza laughs, “My, you don’t give up, do you.” Shrugging, “A drink is a drink, Kaidan. I’ve had lots of those among friends. As long as we have a drink among friends, which we are by the way…friends…sure, that’s possible, if you guess correctly. Now, if you mean anything other than friends, I would have to decline. I’m still your XO, Kaidan. Frat regs and all… 

Disappointed, Kaidan concedes her point and puts his hands up. “Ok. Ok. I’ll think about the quote and your reasoning and get back to you.”

Reza nods at him. 

Before giving up completely, Kaidan asks innocently enough, “Do you like whiskey?”

Narrowing her eyes at him, Reza shakes her head noting the innocent look…cheeky bugger. “Yes. I like mine on the rocks. Why?”

Kaidan shrugs, “Just curious. It’s good information to know, Commander. That’s all.”

Rolling her eyes at his antics, curiosity my ass, she thinks to herself…so much for him giving up his pursuit of her. Apparently, she will have to have that talk sooner rather than later. David was right about him. Just as she tries to formulate in her head how to start that conversation, they both turn towards the med bay doors when they open and Joker crutches out fully dressed in uniform. Unbinding her legs from under her hoodie, Reza stands up to meet him next to their table, leaving Kaidan gaping after her, checking out her outfit. Or lack of one. In her haste for getting dressed, she forgot that her hoodie being several sizes too large, overshadows all of her shorts and leaves her looking half naked. This is what Kaidan picks up on and ends up leering at her long toned legs, eating up every inch between her slippers and the bottom of her hoodie. Not noticing his distraction to her unclothed state, Reza smiles at Joker as he crutches over to her. 

Inwardly groaning at the sight of Reza’s bare legs, Kaidan has to admit, this comfortable looking Reza is much more arousing than dress wearing Reza. There is just something about her relaxed state that turns him on something fierce. He decides to stay sitting, since his aroused state would be quite noticeable, if he were to stand up. 

Joker pauses near his wife and looks first at Kaidan leering at her and then at his semi dressed wife standing in bunny slippers and a hoodie with her hair down. Not having the time to admonish her for not wearing much in front of an impressionable guy who is clearly attracted to her, he focuses on her feet and says, “Nice bunny slippers.”

Rolling her eyes, Reza says, “Thanks. What’s up? I thought your shift didn’t start till 0600?”

“Distress call in the Asgard System of the Exodus Cluster. I’m needed on the bridge.”

“Oh? What’s going on?”

“Don’t know yet, just know that we need to head to Terra Nova ASAP.”

“Do you know what our ETA is?”

“If you grab me some coffee like you did yesterday, I should have that information for you shortly after I report for duty, Ma’am. Maybe some of the good stuff…pretty please.”

Reza grins at him and says, “Deal,” and starts to walk over to the mess kitchen to start the coffee.

Leering at her bare legs as she walks towards the kitchen, Joker groans remembering the last time her legs were bared as they were wrapped around his waist. Coughing to distract his wayward thoughts, he says, “Although, if you come up to the bridge wearing that getup, I might be more distracted by you than the flight stats.”

Reza pauses and turns back around and looks down at herself, “What? I’m wearing clothes.”

Looking at her impishly, “Are you sure? Because from here, it looks as though you are wearing nothing but a hoodie and slippers. I am enjoying the view, though,” making Kaidan choke. 

Leaning on her hip and crossing her arms over her chest, Reza says, “I’m wearing workout clothes, do you want me to show you?” she says about to unzip her hoodie.

Joker looks her up and down and smirks, “Nah, I’ll take your word for it. Either way, DISTRACTING! Gotta hightail it...coffee, Reza, coffee.” Joker snaps his fingers at her and crutches off to the stairs that lead up to the CIC and the bridge.

“Pfft. Smartass…” Reza says as she watches her husband crutch off and turns around to walk back to the kitchen to start the coffee. 

Feeling as though he’s not so obvious any longer, Kaidan follows her and leans against the counter, as she makes the coffee, also enjoying the view. Laughing when she gets up on the counter to grab some coffee grounds on the top shelf after waving him off from helping her, since he’s taller than she is, he gets an eye full of workout shorts that barely covers her ass when she finally does get what she’s looking for. She’s right, she is wearing clothes under her hoodie, but Joker is right too, very distracting…indeed. 

Turning around to face the counter so as to hide the fact that he is aroused again, he sees a bag of coffee behind the coffee pot and pulls it out. “Did you see this? Do you want these instead?”

“Yuck. No thanks. This,” waving the coffee bag in her hand as she measures out a couple of teaspoons into the carafe, “Is the good stuff. I brought it with me from the Citadel. I was there not too long ago. It’s from Argentina. A place on the Citadel imports it especially for me, when I’m on the station. It’s my favorite…hazelnut. Want some?”

“Hmm, sure. It may be early, but I can drink coffee anytime.”

“I knew I liked you for a reason. We’re going to be the best of friends. Both coffee lovers. Now that you know my super-secret hiding place, you won’t steal this will you?” Reza narrows her eyes at him while she makes the pot of coffee.

Faking a thoughtful expression, he winces when she nudges him with her shoulder, and grins at her, “Only if you share a cup with me once in a while.”

“Deal.”

Looking her up and down again, Kaidan decides that maybe he should say something after all. “With the possibility of getting another door slammed in my face, I’m going to say something anyway…Joker may be right about what you are wearing. You are very distracting…not that I’m complaining,” putting his hands up in mock supplication. 

Reza purses her lips and says, “You may be right…but I’ll only change if you wait here for me and guard the coffee, while I quickly grab some sweats.”

Coming to attention, Kaidan salutes her grinning, “Aye-aye, Ma’am.”

“Oh great, I have two smartasses…be right back,” she says waving at him as she dashes off.

Kaidan laughs and leans back against the kitchen counter as he waits for the coffee to percolate. Just now noticing, his headache has completely disappeared. Spending time with Reza, really did make a difference. He remembers laughing with her in the med bay the previous evening. His pain had disappeared quickly then, too. Speaking of the med bay, how long had Joker been in there? Of course, he could have been in there long before he had wandered into the mess hall looking for food. Shrugging, it didn’t matter he supposes. It seemed that Joker was feeling better enough to ogle their XO. Or maybe, it was a universal thing, whenever Reza was in attendance, those around her felt better. He definitely did…he smiles awaiting her return. 

{{{}}}

Walking up onto the bridge with four cups of coffee, Kaidan and Reza join Joker on the bridge. 

Turning around in his chair, Joker eyes the four cups and asks, “Who’s joining us?”

Reza shrugs, “I figured that you’ve already contacted the Captain and thought he may want a cup.”

Joker makes some kissy noises, “Kiss ass…”

Kaidan chokes and laughs turning aside to set the fourth cup down in the cup holder of the copilot’s chair and leans against it to sip his coffee. Moaning at the great taste, he compliments, “Great coffee, Reza. You were right, a little bit of milk goes a long way.”

Joker looks up from sniffing his cup after Rez gives him his sugar laden coffee and says eyeing the both of them, “Inviting the riffraff to drink the good stuff, Rez?”

Sticking her tongue out at him, she says, “I can cut you off anytime…more for me.”

“And me,” Kaidan says chuckling at Joker’s glacial expression when he looks at him.

Taking a sip of the strong but delicious brew, familiar with Rez’s taste in Argentinian coffee, the influence of her father, Joker shakes his head, “Naw, I’m good.”

Walking up into the bridge, surprised to see both Reza and the Lt, both relaxed and in casual wear, talking with Joker, David smiles wondering why everyone is up at this hour, besides Joker who woke him in the first place. Finding out what the distress call was all about, he had originally decided to let Reza sleep in since he knew she was going to need as much rest as possible to deal with what was coming. However, he really shouldn’t have been surprised to find her already awake. What was surprising was that the Lt. was in attendance, as well. Waving off their salutes and Joker’s mock two fingered salute from his seated position, David pauses as he is instantly assaulted by the smell of coffee. “Ooooh, something smells amazing.”

Indicating to Kaidan to grab David his coffee, Reza says, “This is for you, David. It’s from Argentina. I bought some on the Citadel a few weeks back. Thought you might like a cup…”

Holding the cup in both hands and sipping it, David groans a bit and says, “Thanks kid,” smiling at his goddaughter and then pauses when he realizes what he said. 

Seeing David look hesitantly at Kaidan, Reza laughs, “He knows about us, David. He also knows that the Admiral is my father.”

Joker whistles, “Did he wet himself?”

Frowning at him, Reza whacks Joker on the back of the head and mumbles ‘wise-ass,’ just as Kaidan flips him off and David laughs.

“Ow.”

Quirking an eyebrow at his goddaughter, David looks at the blushing Lt. and asks, “How much does he know?”

“Enough,” Reza puts her hand in front of her mouth and turns towards him and mouths ‘not that’ and David sighs, apparently she hasn’t gotten around to explaining her marital status yet. 

Grunting in acknowledgment, David takes a sip of his coffee and moans, savoring the flavor. Good coffee is right. Ok, back to work. “What’s our ETA, Joker?”

Joker swivels his chair back around and looks at his console and sorts through several displays. “We should arrive in the Asgard system in five hours and from there it’s another forty minutes to Terra Nova.”

“Good. Since we are up at this wee hour, we may as well have our briefing now, so you can get in a nap before we arrive. You may need the rest, considering what’s going on. I’ll brief Nihlus later.”

Straightening, Reza says reverting to formal speak, “Understood. What’s going on, Captain?”

Apparently someone had the bright idea to mine-out an asteroid for resources. The X57 asteroid was fitted with three fusion torches, built into the asteroid at key locations to help stabilize the flight path of the asteroids trajectory. These torches would be controlled by an engineering team that would later supervise the extraction of the ore within the asteroid for use by the colony. The plan was to decelerate the asteroids original flight path with controlled burns from the fusion torches, that would allow the asteroid to fall into geosynchronous orbit of Terra Nova naturally. However, along the way since activating the fusion torches for the long haul from its original location, low and behold, something went wrong. Communications with the engineering team on X57 had been cut and there was indication that the fusion torches had been reignited to accelerate the asteroid to instead collide with Terra Nova, killing everyone on the planet. Not having the means to evacuate their population in time, the leaders on Terra Nova had sent out a distress call for help. Since they were looking at a global extinction event if the asteroid were to crash into the planet, then yeah…fun mission. 

The Alliance sent as many ships to help evacuate as many colonists as possible, however due to the time constraints to do so, they needed an infiltration team to land and turn off the torches in time to save the planet, if at all possible. Thus, the Normandy to the rescue...

It was decided that Reza would keep her same squad make up from their last mission; of Nihlus, Kaidan, and Jenkins. As soon as they had a landing zone plotted along the asteroids surface as close as they could get to the first fusion torch, Joker would maneuver a low atmo combat drop. Since they had a lot of ground to cover, they would use the Mako for their ground vehicle. Not knowing exactly what this mission would entail Captain Anderson orders Reza and Kaidan back to their racks to rest up and report within an hour of the drop to coordinate with their teammates. 

Failure was not an option on this mission, so with that in mind, everyone was in agreement and separated to rest up for what was in store for them in five hours and 10 minutes. 

{{{}}}

“Well, that fucking sucked,” Reza says blowing out a large breath as she parks the Mako next to the building’s entrance. This was after running the gauntlet between the six gun turrets that were set up to deter visitors, while Jenkins aimed his shots from the Mako’s canon. What was so awesome about what they just accomplished was they all had to work together to survive such a fete; Nihlus watching for incoming rockets, Kaidan estimating the distance to move the Mako so as not to get hit, and Reza had to time her driving skills down to the last second to help Jenkins’ shots stay true to target. The precise planning had taken all four of them together to maneuver and not get blown to bits. Glad to have such talented people on her team, she smiles at all of them in relief. Damn, Jenkins was as good as his record had shown. He had successfully shot the shit out of all six gun turrets with only a few misses. Giving credit where credit is due, Reza turns towards her gunner and says, “Nice shootin,’ Tex!”

Kaidan and Nihlus look at each other in confusion and Jenkins leans down from the turret and says, “Huh?”

“Pfft. Does no one watch movies? Seriously?” Reza asks her squad mates.

“I know that one…” Joker chimes in over the cabin’s comm link with the Normandy. 

“Shhh…we’ll discuss your winnings later, Joker.” Reza says and Nihlus grins behind his hand when he sees Kaidan wince. Nihlus knows of the competition the two humans were playing. He was lurking around the corner from their table the night before and heard what the two Lieutenants were talking about. Based on the quote from last night not being responded to, the apparent count is Lt Alenko:1, Lt. Moreau: 1. The fact that Joker wasn’t playing fair, seeing as he had already won, was just another piece to the human male psyche that makes Nihlus curious to how this current situation will play out, especially if Reza ever found out. It was another show to watch and since he was going to shadow Reza for the time being, he may as well enjoy the experience by observing human mating rituals. So far, they were fascinating. 

Joker laughs.

Lowering the volume on the comm link to minimize her husband’s boisterous laughter, Reza looks back at her squad, “Ok. Here’s the plan…Jenkins, stay in the Mako. Like we did on Presrop, watch for stragglers, only show your teeth if absolutely necessary. I’ll inform you if we need extra firepower. Understood?”

“Roger that, Ma’am,” Jenkins says as he seals himself in the turret once again.

Looking at her other two squad mates, Reza points at them and says, “You two are with me. Hopefully, somewhere inside will be an ‘off switch’ that will extinguish this torch. So…let’s get this party started. Saddle up.” Seeing more confusion, Reza sighs and says again, “Seriously? That was classic. I’m disappointed in you, Lt. You should know that one.”

Frowning, Kaidan was about to say something when Captain Anderson chimes in, “It’s from every western classic out there, it means ‘Let’s go.’”

“Thank you, sir. As explained by our Captain, let’s go, gentleman. Let’s kick this pig…and find out what the hell is going on,” Reza says as she puts her helmet on. 

“Let’s kick the tires and light the fires…’” Joker says adding another great quote.

“Exactly…” Reza smiles as she receives a thumb up from her squad and pops the seal on the Mako before jumping down onto the surface of the asteroid, noticing the strange gravity. “Be careful where you set your feet. Don’t do any jumping jacks or we may never find you again, once you float off into space,” she warns her crew. 

Not knowing what jumping jacks are, but understanding the ‘jump’ reference, Nihlus says over the comm, “Roger that, Commander.”

After hearing an ‘aye-aye’ from Kaidan, Reza signals them to follow her into the building, weapons ready as she cycles the airlock at the entrance. 

After entering and noting that the inner room is empty for the time being, she signals them to take off their helmets. After clipping it to her armor, Reza looks around. Checking her motion detector, she notes that there is movement in the next room. Putting a finger to her lips and then twisting her fingers to motion no talking, she points to opposite sides of the door for Nihlus and Kaidan to use as cover as she finds out who may be waiting for them on the other side. Once ready, she draws her assault rifle and clicks over to polonium rounds. Motioning that they were to go on the count of three, she hovers her hand over the button that will open the door. At the nods of her squad mates, signaling that they are ready, Reza motions with her fingers; 3…2…1, and opens the door.

…SHIT…

“Fucking Batarians!”

{{{}}}

After successfully shutting down all three torches, running the gauntlet of more gun turrets, walking between live blasting caps, and listening to the assassination of one of the people helping them figure out what kind of C.F. situation they were walking into on this damn asteroid, Reza was fed up. After what happened on Elysium and Torfan, you could call Reza not a fan of the Batarian race. Mostly, for one reason and one reason alone. They were known as slavers in their part of the galaxy and humans where their choice of slaves. There is absolutely nothing worse than a slaver in her book and she will do anything to stop those that rain that type of terror down on others. 

So, the impromptu meeting with the henchmen of their identified terrorist, Balak, just after disengaging the third torch, made Reza’s already frayed patience…gone. Not really wanting to hear any excuses the Batarians had for their actions in helping the fucker responsible for this little hijack, was the last straw. Motioning behind her back for her squad mates to be ready, she tenses when the lead henchman snarls at them, “Hold it right there. This doesn’t have to end in bloodshed. Don’t come any closer. We can do this the hard way…or we can end this peacefully.”

“I didn’t think you Batarians knew the meaning of the word,” Reza snarls at the four eyed bastard in disbelief.

“Look, I’m just doing my job here. Hijacking this rock wasn’t my idea. I signed on to make a little profit. A quick slave grab. Nothing more,” Henchman asshole #1 explains. 

“Not good enough. All slavers deserve to die…” Reza sneers back.

Already tense, Kaidan looks at his XO and asks quietly, “Commander…?”

Interrupting her Lt’s question, she waves her hand behind her, motioning him to stop. Nihlus huffs in his direction and readies his weapon, recognizing Reza’s combat stance as she readies herself for a biotic attack.

Henchman asshole #1 narrows his four eyes at them and warns, “Be reasonable, human. We outnumber you. There is no way you will walk out of here alive…”

“I’ll take that chance…ATTACK!” Reza shouts as she makes the throw mnemonic on the lead henchman and he is thrown into the wall behind him in such a way that he dents the wall and falls to the ground in a heap, extremely dead. The other Batarians in the room spread out and they all take cover among the containers stacked here and there across the main room. 

After a successful but tough fight, Reza lowers her head to the floor and sighs in relief as the last Batarian is killed, and turns to thank her lieutenant for saving her life. After breaking cover to throw a grenade at one of the Batarians hiding behind a barricade, Kaidan had tackled her to the ground after seeing a laser pointed at her back, just as she was returning to safety. He had grabbed her at the last moment, landing on top of her to put up his barrier around them just as their cover; a container behind them burst a part from the impact. Catching her breath at the shock of being thrown to the ground, they had both looked up to watch Nihlus take aim and solve their problem, taking the guy out for daring to try to kill them.

Releasing a sigh of relief, Reza looks up at her Lt and notes his barrier surrounding them dissipate. Grateful as she is however, Reza starts to feel a little uncomfortable when Kaidan realizes how close he is to her and his amber eyes start to swirl with blue energy as he becomes aware of how his lower half is molded over hers. 

As a biotic herself, she knows only two reasons why his eyes would be glowing blue; during combat or when aroused. Her eyes do the same thing, in both circumstances. Suddenly nervous, she licks her lips and pauses when she notices that Kaidan is now looking at her amorously and she recognizes a bulge starting to form in his armor from his position still posed over hers. Not wanting to embarrass her new friend and trusted squad mate, she clears her suddenly dry throat and says, “I’m fine, Lt. Please move so I may sit up.”

Understanding slowly dawns on Kaidan as he stares at his XO. She fits so perfectly against him. Reluctant to let her go, but cognizant of their audience, although Nihlus is checking the bodies of the fallen Batarians, he nods at her and moves to the side so she can sit up. Getting himself under control, he stands up and offers Reza a hand which she takes, and he levers her up. Releasing her hand, he walks over to his pistol, which he had dropped when he grabbed her to save her life. Holstering his weapon, he walks back over to her as she also holsters her weapon. Suddenly a little miffed at why they even had to fight the Batarians in the first place, since apparently they had wanted to call a truce, Kaidan asks, “Was that really necessary, Commander?”

Looking at Kaidan and noticing that he is looking around at the bodies of the Batarians they just dispatched, Reza sighs internally. Time for another lesson, it seemed. “Yes, it was. If you have trouble following my orders…” Reza says leaving her statement open-ended; she looks at Kaidan as he rubs the back of his neck in frustration. 

He looks back at her and shakes his head, “No, Commander. I wasn’t questioning your orders; earlier…I guess I was only trying to give you an alternate solution. I’m sorry, if it came off as questioning your actions again.”

“Kaidan, I appreciate your candor and there will be times in the future I will appreciate feedback from my squad mates, however, you should know I will not abide Batarians taking slaves at any time. Or, any slavers, no matter who they are. In the med bay, yesterday, we talked about you giving me alternate solutions to my renegade tendencies, but in this situation…I’m sorry, but I couldn’t let them go. They would have done it elsewhere to others. I couldn’t let that happen. Please understand…” Reza says after putting her hand on his shoulder and looking at him. 

Putting a hand over hers, Kaidan squeezes her hand and nods at her, “Yes, I understand.”

Dropping her hand after he does, she says, “Good.” Wincing slightly, she adds, “If my actions today makes you not want to serve with me, talk to me later, okay? I would hate to lose you, but if you are uncomfortable, I can put in a transfer for you. Anywhere you would like to go.”

Looking up at her, Kaidan steps forward and says in a serious tone, “No, Ma’am. I’m good. I’m right where I want to be…on the Normandy or here with you…groundside. It is an honor to serve with you.”

“Ok. We’re good, Lt. I understand you will always try to end conflict without gunplay if possible, and I will never encourage you to not go that route. But, there are times like this one, where you need to see the bigger picture and slavery is never a good thing. You heard him; he may not have wanted to be a part of the hijacking, but was here for a slave grab. He wasn’t just guilty by association, but was here to participate. He was just as guilty as the fucktard in charge.” 

Nodding in agreement and smiling slightly at her choice of words, Kaidan says, “I see your point, Ma’am.”

Leaning in to him, she hugs him briefly and steps back, grinning at his surprise. “Thank you, Lt, for saving my life. In our line of work, I believe that I will get the chance to repay you for doing so,” she says smiling at him. “You are a good man and I’m honored to be serving with you, as well. Just think about what I said. If you change your mind and want to talk to me later, or if you have any additional concerns, let me know.” 

He nods at her and sighs. 

Nihlus huffs as he walks up to them and hands Reza a key card. “I found this card on one of the Batarians; it leads to a central facility. I bet that’s where we’ll find this Balak.”

Examining both sides of the key card, Reza says, “Come on gentlemen, we have a terrorist to kill,” and leads them out of the facility to their transport. 

{{{}}}

Encountering more gun turrets, and moving ones at that, they found the main facility pretty easily. After destroying the gun turrets, Reza decided to park the Mako behind one of the barricades away from the other vehicles, currently parked next to the entrance and told Jenkins to monitor for any stragglers again, covering their six. Just in case, any were to show up, she didn’t want the Mako to become a target. Upon entering the facility, they were met with heavy resistance right away and between the three of them they made short work of the few Batarian soldiers and drones before a lone Batarian interrupted them to apparently get his rocks off by spewing insults at them. 

“Balak, I presume,” Reza states as she eyes her prey above her on the second level. This particular Batarian is wearing red armor (nice target) and is petting a varren. Reza laughs a little when she compares this Batarian asshole stroking his pet to the movie reference she quoted earlier. Hiding her grin, she makes note to tell Joker about it later, since he most likely is the only one who would understand her sense of humor towards it. 

“You humans! You’re almost more trouble than you’re worth,” Balak says, spitting his words at them. 

“I’m just getting started…” she sneers in return. 

“Predictable. But this is over. I’m leaving this asteroid. If you try to stop me, I’ll detonate charges set up around the room and your helper and her friends are all going to die.” 

“You don’t get to leave, Balak. Not after what you’ve done.” Fucking asshole…Reza thinks to herself.

“What I’ve done? This is nothing compared to what has been done to my people. We’ve been forced into exile. Forced to survive on what we can scrounge up. It’s been like that for decades,” Balak says as he starts to pace. 

“Don’t make it sound like you are the innocent party here. You’ve brought this upon yourselves.” 

“Really? You invaded our space. Took our resources, and when we asked the Council for aid, they brushed us off. We were left to defend ourselves. But the humans were stronger than us. We knew that. The Council knew that. But it didn’t matter. It was YOU. You and your kind are the only reason we are in this position.”

Typical war monger mentality, everything is someone else’s fault. Shaking her head at him, she states, “How does killing innocent people make up for that?”

“I could ask you the same thing. How many innocent Batarians died at Torfan! Oh! Or, have you forgotten about that.” 

Seriously, he wanted to talk about Torfan? Bad move, asshole. Glowering at him, “Torfan was in retaliation for your attack on Elysium. You pushed, we pushed back.” 

“Enough! You couldn’t possibly understand…” Balak yells and goes off on a tirade about how humans are the blight of the galaxy, pacing above them completely oblivious to the tense situation around him and the plotting going on below. 

Blah blah blah…Reza tunes Balak’s whining out as she wonders how the fuck she can save the scientists and engineers and still kill Balak. Looking over at her squad mates to see if they have any ideas, she notices that Alenko is anxious, clenching his jaw, clearly irritated at their predicament, but he’s also looking around the room, taking note of the placement of the bombs. Nihlus on the other hand is sizing up the Batarians above and growling, checking over his rifle, making it very clear that he thinks that Balak needs to die, consequences be damned. The irony of her squad mates unconsciously playing their roles of the angel and the devil on her shoulders is not lost on her. Which choice should she pick; save the scientists and let the bastard go, or kill Balak but lose the scientists. Fuck! Suddenly, a brilliant idea comes to her and she lowers her voice to speak over the squad channel.

“Joker! Do you think you can engineer an Alpha Mike Foxtrot maneuver?”

“Ah…” clearly surprised but knowing instantly what she is talking about, he chuckles, “Abso-fucking-lutely, Commander!”

“Good. Start setting it up.”

“Roger that.”

Reza hears a chuckle from Kaidan and looks at him. He grins and gives her a nod, indicating that he is also familiar with what she just set in motion. He gestures to her that there are three bombs above and two below and she nods at him, indicating the two below will be his to take care of. She turns to Nihlus when she hears a huff of confusion and holds out her hand to wait, just as Balak yells and turns back to her. 

“…Actually you just don’t want to understand. I wouldn’t put it past the Butcher from both Elysium and Torfan to ever understand the plight my fellow Batarians have had to do to eke out a living. And, I’m done wasting my breath. Now, if you want your friends to live, I suggest you step aside and let me leave.” 

Pantomiming irritation, Reza paces and wrings her hands as she playacts like she is seriously thinking about his statement, and finally lets out a loud irritated sigh, “Fine! You can go, but this isn’t over, Balak. I’ll find you eventually.” 

“Maybe, but I will make sure you won’t follow me today. Those charges are still on a timer. Better hurry if you want to save your friends,” he smirks as he erects a barrier at the edge of the stairs leading to his location and laughs as he moves off towards the exit. 

Reza takes off towards the first of the bombs, running across the facility to the next set of stairs, giving commands, “Alenko go! Nihlus cover him! I’ve got the bombs up on the catwalk!” Running towards her first target, intermittently taking cover and firing at drones, she says, “Jenkins, a vehicle may be leaving shortly from the facility. Observe only. Do not act! Report its direction to Joker so he can extrapolate where Balak’s ship might be hiding.” Hearing an ‘aye-aye’ from Jenkins, she pauses as she kneels near the first bomb and takes the few seconds to disarm it before charging over to the second bomb alcove along the catwalk to do the same thing. Just as she disarms the second one, she hears Alenko report that his bombs are deactivated as well. Giving an affirmative, she says, “Take Nihlus and look for the scientists location, I’m almost to the third bomb. Joker, do you have the coordinates for Balak’s ship, yet?”

“Yes, Ma’am. Based on the directions Jenkins gave me, we have extrapolated where he may have landed his ship and have found its location. He has not as yet arrived.”

“Good. Jenkins, connect the Mako’s view screen to the orbital satellites surrounding the asteroid and narrow in on the coordinates of Balak’s ship. We’ll join you in the Mako as soon as we can. Meet us at the entrance. We’re going to have front seats to the show, boys. Take over Joker. I need to finish up here. You have free reign to add the Joker charm. Just wait for my command.”

Smirking in his chair, Joker says, “Will do.”

“The scientists are safe, Commander,” Alenko informs her.

Hearing rifle fire at the last remaining resistance, Reza finishes up with deactivating the last bomb and informs her squad mates that all bombs are now defunct. “Alenko, inform the scientists we will return momentarily and rendezvous with me and Nihlus at the entrance, we have a show to watch. Did you hear that, Nihlus?” 

Huffing comes over the comm and Nihlus says as he finishes off the last drone, “Roger that, Commander.”

At the entrance to the facility they ready their helmets to exit into the vacuum so they can meet up with Jenkins in the Mako. Nihlus puts a hand on her shoulder interrupting her and says, “I can’t believe that you let him go.”

Reza smirks and looks at Kaidan who is trying not to laugh in the face of the clearly confused and frustrated Turian. Grinning at each other, she says to Nihlus, “Just wait for it.”

Nihlus scoffs not understanding why suddenly he is in the dark, when the rest of the crew knows exactly what’s going on apparently. “What the hell is an Alpha Mike Foxtrot? I’m not familiar with that maneuver.”

Ignoring him, she walks into the airlock and waves them inside to cycle the air. As the VI informs them that it’s safe for them to exit the airlock, Joker says, “Balak has reached his ship, Commander, and it looks as though he is readying for takeoff.”

“Roger that. Come on boys, let’s pick up the pace,” she says as she starts to jog to the Mako’s location. “All set, Jenkins?”

Jenkins responds, “Yes, ma’am. The popcorn is ready and waiting.”

Understanding he means the feed is connected, she smiles; the Corporal clearly knows what's coming. 

They arrive at the Mako and enter; she in the pilot’s seat, Nihlus in the passenger seat, and Kaidan joins Jenkins in the cabin. They all look at the view screen and see that it's zoomed in on a small shuttle readying for takeoff. 

Nihlus looks at Kaidan and asks confused, “Popcorn?”

Kaidan puts a finger to his lips, the universal gesture to be quiet, and points at the view screen. 

Frowning at Nihlus for interrupting, Reza asks, “Joker?”

“Ready.” 

Watching Balak’s shuttle lift off and hover slightly off the ground readying for takeoff, she gives the order, “Checkmate.”

Since technically the Normandy’s stealth system doesn’t preclude it from sight if someone was to look out a window, it was used more for hiding in plain sight from ship’s instruments. So, if an enemy is watching over their instruments rather than their view screen for signs of pursuit then they wouldn’t see the Normandy coming until the last moment. Case in point, so when Reza asked Jenkins to hook the Mako’s view screen into the orbital cameras, they were focused mainly on the exact sight of Balak’s ship and not on the approach of the Normandy. So, technically, they couldn’t see anything until Joker switched off the stealth mode. Holding their breath, they watch the feed closely, waiting as Joker maneuvers the Normandy into Balak’s line of sight. 

“Deactivating stealth mode,” Joker says over the comm.

They watch fascinated as the frigate sized Normandy suddenly appears out of nowhere right in front of the small Batarian shuttle, briefly allowing the passengers inside to have an ‘Oh Shit’ moment, before Joker yells, “ADIOS, MOTHER FUCKER!!!” into the comm and fires the Normandy’s canon point blank, blowing it right out of the sky. 

Loud cheering comes over the comm channel from the crew on the Normandy and Reza’s team celebrates in the Mako. 

“A beautiful sight, Joker! Good job everyone!” Reza says laughing over the mike as she watches the wreckage of the Batarian shuttle rain down upon the asteroid. 

Nihlus looks at Reza in shock, “So, that’s what an Alpha Mike Foxtrot maneuver is? I don’t think that’s in any of the books.” 

Reza smirks, “It’s not.”

Nihlus laughs and shakes his head.

“That was awesome!” Corporal Jenkins yells from his seat in the back and Kaidan leans forward to fist bump with her, laughing all the while.

Reza just smiles and congratulates everyone on a job well done. Mostly, she’s thrilled that what they just accomplished means one less Batarian terrorist to deal with and the people of Terra Nova including the scientists are now safe. Plus, more than anything, she was able to make Joker the hero of the day and to fulfill one of his fantasies of using the guns on the Normandy to save the day. Anything for her husband…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: The 'AMF' theme to this chapter was inspired by the newer A-Team movie with Liam Neeson and Bradley Cooper. Yeah, I went there...I figured it went well with the badass attitude of our beloved characters in ME. Plus, it keeps with Joker's reputation as being the best pilot, ever.
> 
> 'C.F.' is charlie foxtrot in military speak or cluster fuck. Take your pick. Guess which one I prefer...anyway, I'm going to be using C.F. from now on. Use which version you prefer. 
> 
> Quotes used:  
> 'Once you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.' Any decent fan of Star Trek should know of this line...just saying. 
> 
> ‘Nice shootin’ Tex!’ Ghostbusters…duh.
> 
> 'Saddle up'...could also be from NCIS. I've been watching a marathon of episodes lately. 
> 
> ‘Let’s kick this pig!’ Down Periscope…hello! Also, I would like to thank Harley Davidson, since it originally came from them. 
> 
> ‘Let’s kick the tires and light the fires!' If you add ‘Big daddy’ afterward, then it's from Independence Day. But as is, it’s from ~ Top Gun. Makes sense, considering it’s something pilots say, which is why I have Joker saying it… :P


	8. Celebration

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thank you for all the kudos and comments. It's great to hear that my story makes people happy. It does wonders for me too. 
> 
> Sorry for the wait, my muse went on vacation. What started out as an ending to the last chapter, grew to become it's own monster chapter. Enjoy!

“Quite the show, kid,” Anderson says as he takes his helmet off after coming in from the airlock at the main facility along with the Doc. 

“Yeah, I like making things go boom,” Reza says impishly making her squad laugh and David and Karin shake their heads and laugh at her cheeky response. 

Her godfather rolls his eyes and grabs her to give her a quick hug. Pulling back he takes her shoulders and looks at her seriously, “Thought we lost you there for a second.”

Uncomfortable from his scrutiny of her, Reza extricates herself from him and rubs the back of her neck as she winces; forgetting that her suit-cam would have caught the whole debacle of how the Lt saved her sorry ass earlier. Looking at Alenko who suddenly looks like he wants to disappear, she smiles at her godfather and says, “Well, that is why I have a great team behind me. It was the quick thinking of the Lt that saved me, sir, and the lethal reaction of my Turian sidekick that took care of the problem. They both deserve medals.”

Looking at her squad mates in turn, David notices that Nihlus is shaking his head at her demotion of his status as her partner to ‘sidekick.’ Then he blinks at the Lt for suddenly coughing at receiving so much attention and blushing in response. “Well, next time I’m at the Citadel, I’ll speak with Councilor Sparatus and recommend that Nihlus receive some sort of bonus for saving your life. But, truthfully, I think he already deserves one for putting up with you for the past 10 months.”

“Hey!” Reza says huffily and waves him off as she notices the Doc give her a come hither motion with her head. She and the Doc walk off into the corner to speak privately. 

Anderson chuckles at his goddaughter’s response to his teasing and watches her walk away. Nodding at the chortling Turian, Anderson walks over to Alenko to say thanks. “Good job, Lt. Thank you for saving my goddaughter.”

“I only did my job, sir. I was watching her six, as ordered,” Alenko says earnestly.

Looking at him, he nods understanding, “Be that as it may, I appreciate your efforts. I’ve already notified her father of your heroics. I’m sure he will be grateful.”

Looking down at hearing that Admiral Hackett knows of his reaction to the threat on his XO’s life, Kaidan blushes. “Uh…thanks.”

Seeing he’s made the Lt uncomfortable, Anderson straightens and says, “Speaking of which...Commander?”

Reza straightens and walks over to him with the Doc in tow, “Yes, Sir?”

Looking slightly apologetic, David says, “You may want to contact your father. He was asking to speak to you.”

Grimacing at her godfather for relaying the message, Reza nods and turns to her team who awaiting orders. Sighing, Reza instructs, “Lt Alenko, please introduce the Captain and the Doctor to the lead engineer and the survivors. See if any of them need medical care. I’ll debrief with you later.”

Nihlus pulls her aside after the Lt says ‘aye-aye’ at her orders and precedes the Captain and Doctor back into the facility. “Do you want my company, Commander, when you speak to your father?”

“No. Thanks anyway. We told him that I would debrief with him today regarding the Major Kyle incident. I can’t avoid him forever.”

As Reza turns away to ready her helmet, Nihlus grabs her arm to stop her. “You did some great work here, Shepard. I don’t know if anyone else could have saved the scientists and rid the galaxy of that Batarian bastard, Balak. I’m extremely impressed. Not even a Spectre could have pulled that off.”

Looking at her Turian friend and seeing something in his eyes, Reza narrows hers. “That’s why you’re here, isn’t it. You’re evaluating me…to become a Spectre. The first human Spectre,” she deduces and when Nihlus drops her arm and looks away, her guess is proven right.

Knowing he can’t lie to his friend, not now that she has guessed correctly, he huffs, “I never wanted to hide this from you, Shepard. But yes, you are correct. Your Alliance came to the Council and put in the request to have one of their best soldiers vetted by one of the Council’s best.”

“And the rest is history…Huh. So, I take it that my father knows about this?” she asks not really surprised when Nihlus nods his head. “And the Captain, too?” 

Nodding again, he explains, “They were the ones who recommended you.” 

Of course they were, Reza thinks to herself. Laughing sarcastically, she shakes her head at the gall of her two father figures. No wonder she felt they were walking on eggshells around her the past several months. She knew something was up. Not really surprised since she knows of David’s past as a possible Spectre candidate, it made sense that since his prospects were dashed that he would support her candidacy. Shrugging, it figures that her father was in on the secret too, since the two of them together were a force to be reckoned with. Wondering if her mother knew, she purses her lips and looks down thinking. 

“Are you upset? You don’t seem pissed off.” Nihlus asks as he looks at her warily, taking her silence as a bad omen. “I’ve seen you pissed off, many times. Before you say anything, when we were first paired up, I really didn’t know what to think of you. Actually, after finding out about your familial relations with both the Admiral and the Captain, I thought you were a joke. I want to apologize for that, now. After working with you for the past ten months, I’ve seen you at your best and your worst, and I know that you were picked for a reason. And, if I hadn’t already known that you were the right one for the position, I would know that now after today.” Bowing his head at her in respect, which is a high honor among Turians, Nihlus adds, “I’m honored to have been paired up with you, Commander. It has been the best months of my career as a Spectre to evaluate you for the position. Plus, being able to call the great Commander Shepard a good friend, is an honor by itself. I’ve already given your candidacy high praise to my superior, Councilor Sparatus. Once you are made Spectre, I’m looking forward to working with you officially. We’ll make our partnership legendary.”

“Nihlus…thank you,” Reza says quietly looking up at him and bows at him in return. “I’m not upset. I understand why my father and David put me up for the position. I also understand that if I’m selected, what that would mean for not only the Alliance but for the human race and where we stand in the galactic community. Regarding our partnership…even though it was a rocky road at first with you looking over my shoulder in the first few months, I count you as one of my closest friends. So, thank you for your honest words. I truly appreciate it. It has been an honor serving with you, as well.”

Looking at her confused, Nihlus asks, “Rocky road? Why would you compare our first few months to ice cream?”

“Huh?” Reza says jerking to look at him. When his inquiry sunk in, Reza starts to laugh. Wheezing a little as she calms from her fit of laughter, “That’s what your translator came up with…ice cream?” Reza laughs again and doubles over holding her waist as she guffaws at the wonder that is universal translators. Seeing Nihlus’ confused look, she explains, “Rocky road is an ice cream, true, but that is not what I meant. I meant that we definitely didn’t hit it off at first, but now…we are comrades in arms and friends to boot.” Grabbing him, she hugs him awkwardly around his cowl, surprising him. 

Huffing at her as they separate, Nihlus clears his suddenly dry throat from inhaling her scent as she hugs him and says suddenly uncomfortable with the affection displayed, “Those bombs we deactivated earlier, I wanted to get a look at them again, close up. I may have a contact who knows where the Batarians could have gotten them.”

Seeing that she made him uncomfortable with her gesture, Reza smiles and says, “Sure…let me know if you need my help, I may have a contact or two if yours don’t pan out. I’ll see you on the Normandy,” and waves to him as she turns to put her helmet on and cycle through the airlock. 

{{{}}}

After exiting the airlock, Reza steps out into the vacuum of the asteroid and looks out towards the Normandy sitting on the surface of the asteroid, the bridge pointing towards the entrance to the main facility. Admiring her sleek hull, Reza smiles within her helmet, realizing just how lucky she is to be the XO of such a beautifully designed ship. Feeling a prickle of awareness that someone is watching her, she squints up into the viewport of the bridge and smiles when she recognizes the face looking back at her. She waves at him and nods when he waves back. Putting two fingers over her mouth plate on her helmet, she gives her husband the kiss gesture before moving off toward the ramp leading up into the cargo bay. 

Thinking of her husband, she remembers what Karin had said to her after they had moved off to speak quietly. 

{{{Karin hugs her quickly and says, “I know this isn’t the first time or the last, but it was scary to see nonetheless. Thank goodness the Lt was paying attention. Just saying…” she sighs as she squeezes the woman she considers a daughter to her before releasing her.

“I’m sorry, Karin. You know I have no control over what may or may not happen on missions. I can only do my best in each situation. But, yeah, you’re right, the Lt saved my ass. Without him…well, you know,” Reza says quietly looking over at her team with reverence.

Nodding, Karin turns towards her and lowers her voice to a whisper, “You may want to speak with your husband. He was upset…to put it mildly.” At Reza’s wince, Karin adds, “Preferably before he has a breakdown. I would suggest you find some private time together after you speak to your father to calm him down.”

Looking worried, Reza nods quickly. No wonder she hadn’t heard from Joker since the incident, other than the setup of the endgame, of course. He had sounded normal during the maneuver preparations, but now that she thinks about it, his voice seemed strained when he had relayed to her that the Captain and the Doctor were going to meet them in the atrium. His adrenaline levels must have waned enough to give him time to think about what had occurred and the close call that she weathered through, thanks to her squad mate. That was probably the problem. Alone time with her husband did sound like a good idea, it would probably do them both some good. She is suddenly feeling a little bereft of physical contact and Joker was always good at giving her some when she needed it. Reza thanks the Doc for the information before joining the Captain and her team for orders.}}} 

Walking through the shield on the onramp of the cargo bay, Reza pauses when she sees Corporal Jenkins and Chief LaFlamme supervise the rest of the Marine detail as they situate the Mako into its cradle, checking it for damage from their mad dash through four separate gun turret gauntlets, before making sure it is ready to be used again. Seeing that they have everything well in hand, Reza walks over to her locker and takes her helmet off and changes into her fatigues. 

Chief LaFlamme walks over and waits patiently for her to notice him, trying not to stare at her while she changes. Never one to not notice a beautiful woman, Orden looks down at the ground to give his XO some privacy, even though as Marines, seeing your fellow comrades getting dressed or undressed for missions was pretty commonplace. No one ever made a big deal about it anymore, the mix of male and female soldiers getting naked in mixed company. Or at least, it wasn’t kosher to do so. And, if someone did, well, things could get ugly and usually the offender would be transferred. In this case, Orden just wanted to give his XO the respect she deserved.

Noticing the Chief, Reza asks after finishing with her combat boots, “What’s the verdict, Chief?”

Orden smiles at his XO’s vernacular…he prefers her relaxed leadership style. In his few years in the Alliance, most of the XO’s he’s served with were quite frankly assholes with sticks permanently lodged in places that he shouldn’t name, but Commander Shepard was a breath of fresh air. Running through the information typically given in an AAR, he glosses over what he and the marine detail had observed about the state of the Mako.

“Ah, so no permanent damage then…good. Make sure you order extra parts when you put in the requisition order the next time we dock with an Alliance supply depot. We should stock up, you know just in case…especially with my driving…” Reza says with her eyes twinkling as she grins at him.

Orden laughs at her joke regarding her driving of the Mako. Even though he hasn’t seen it for himself, yet, the Corporal had been waxing poetic over how crazy awesome she was with her carefree driving skills and the fact that she can joke over her own antics, was pretty cool in his book. “By the way, Commander, the way you dealt with that Batarian terrorist…pretty badass move, if you don’t mind me saying so.”

“It was a team effort…but yes, yes it was. Thanks.” Reza says and turns to gather her weapons to return them to the arms master. Making a sudden decision, she says, “Chief, I have a mission for you and the Corporal. Let me drop off my weapons and let’s muster over there,” she points at the arms locker. 

Smiling, Orden says, “Aye-aye, Ma’am,” and goes to gather Jenkins. They meet up with her once she delivers and signs over her weapons. 

After telling them to stand at ease, she looks them over and explains the mission. “Apparently, there are three missing scientists within a few clicks of the torches. Communications are down, but the lead engineer said that a few drones were sighted and if they are anything like the ones my squad and I came across in the main facility, you should arm yourselves. I want you to do a reconnaissance of the area.” Bringing up her omni-tool, she sends the two of them the coordinates. “Here’s the grid coordinates I need checked out. Check for the missing engineers and gather any other intel you have on this rock. Lieutenant Pressly will be your point of contact should you have any problems and once Lt Alenko returns from the facility, then he will take over. Pick your team; you shouldn’t need more than four. Also, be careful of the gravity out there, it’s similar to Luna base, if you’ve been there. I don’t want to hear of any space walks, if you don’t mind,” Reza pauses as she narrows her eyes at her Chief and Corporal.

Knowing that she is joking with them, Jenkins shakes his head. Orden, hesitant at first to not automatically respond, notices the grin on Jenkin’s face. He smirks and puts his hands up in supplication, and says, “Wouldn’t dream of it, Commander.”

Rolling her eyes at them, she says smiling, “Good. Once you’re satisfied the Mako is ready to go and you and your team are suited up, let me know. Otherwise, carry on, Chief…Corporal.”

“Roger that, Ma’am,” they say as they salute and move off back to the Mako to pick their team for their mission. Seeing the big smile on the Corporal’s face, Orden asks, “What is it?”

Watching their XO walk off towards the elevator, Jenkins says, “Have you ever had a cooler XO, Chief? After only two missions, she trusts us enough to go on our own.”

Taking a peek at the Commander as she enters the elevator, Orden agrees and says, “It’s just a reconnaissance mission, Corporal.” Seeing the slight frown on his friend’s face, he adds, “But, yeah, you’re right, the Commander is pretty cool. Let’s do her proud and find these missing engineers. We’ll scour every inch…”

“You betcha…” Jenkins grins and bounces off to gather his gear as Orden looks after him and grins at his display of exuberance. You betcha…indeed, and follows his young friend to get ready for their mission and recruit their squad. 

{{{}}}

After notifying the Captain and Lt Alenko of the pending mission she sent the alternate team on to find the missing personnel, Reza contacts Joker as she ascends in the elevator. “Joker, can you transfer the call from the Admiral into the comm room? I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

“Already linked, Commander.”

“Thanks.” 

Not hearing anything else from him, she shrugs thinking he’s probably just busy at his station. Turning to walk up the stairs to the CIC, Reza has a quick meeting with Lt. Pressly and informs him of the upcoming mission. “I’ve sent Chief LaFlamme and Corporal Jenkins on a reconnaissance mission to the grid coordinates I just forwarded to your omni-tool. Hopefully, they will find the missing engineers. They will report to you until Lt Alenko has returned from the main facility. Please coordinate with them.”

Lt Pressly salutes her and says, “Roger that, Ma’am.”

Dismissing him, she heads off to the comm room and waves off the salutes of the guards to the entrance and walks inside. She stops in surprise when she comes face to face with her husband sitting in one of the chairs lining the room.

“Joker, what…?” She says seeing him stand up, leaving his crutches leaning against the wall opposite and walks towards her. 

“Shhhhh…” he says as he locks the comm room door and turns to walk her backward up against the bulkhead. Before she can say anything, he takes her face in both of his hands and traces her face with his eyes and pauses when they land on her lips. Tracing her lips with a thumb, Joker leans into her and kisses her lightly; just enough to enjoy the slight contour of them before she parts them. Pulling back, he whispers, “I almost lost you today…”

Wrapping her arms around him, she flips their position, to alleviate some of the weight on his fragile bones and props him up against the bulkhead. Moving up to brush his body with hers, she in return takes his face in her hands, lightly brushing over his beard and kisses him, making him groan. Breathless from their kiss, she pulls away after Joker wraps his arms around her waist and smiles at him, “Oh…you aren’t going to get rid of me that easily.”

“I’m serious, Rez. Without Kaidan, you would be…” he pauses as his voice catches.

Shaking her head at him, “But I’m not. Luck was on my side…”

“Well, that lucky charm today saved your life. I’ll never be jealous of him again.”

“Yes you will…”

“Fine, I will…but he can drool after you from now on and I won’t mind as long as he has your six and brings you back to me…every time.”

“You know that I will probably save his life, too, right? This is my job. I’ve put my life on the line many times over. Today was a close call, yes, but it’s happened before and it will happen again. That is the life of a Marine, babe. You knew this when you started dating me…” Rez says after looking at him solemnly when he tightens his hold on her.

“Yes, your right. The difference between knowing that and seeing it firsthand kind of made it real…you know. I’ve never had access to a live feed before. Seeing you in action not only gets me hot and bothered for you…seriously needing some alone time with you later, but it also made me realize how dangerous your job is. In the past, I was always informed after the fact and especially when you needed comfort. Not that I didn’t enjoy the benefits…” Joker says impishly as he grins at her and waggles his eyebrows at her suggestively.

“Perv…”

“Better believe it, babe.” 

Reza purses her lips, “Maybe you shouldn’t watch if it makes you upset.”

“No. I want to watch. It may be scary at times, but I actually feel better knowing what’s going on. Besides, I don’t think I would have been able to save the day today if I wasn’t listening in.”

Reza laughs and nods at him, understanding his need to be a part of this side of her life. Recognizing that he also wants to protect her, she’s glad that he can be there with her, or at least in spirit. “If you think about it, you have my six, too. You may not be there physically, but you are there to help nonetheless. I like our new arrangement. We are more in sync and you helped a lot today.”

“MmmHmm,” Joker says as he turns his hat around on his head so he can bury his head into her neck as he pulls her into him as close as they can get against the wall. 

Enjoying the feeling of him against her, she closes her eyes and just relishes being held by him after the day they just had. Suddenly, feeling a slight buzz of electric current arch through her, she moans when she realizes that Joker has taken advantage of their position and has licked her amp port. He knows perfectly well that it’s the one place on her body that gets an instant reaction of arousal from her. It’s also an area on her body that she is very careful with, not letting him touch her there unless he wants a very sensitive wife that can come at the slightest touch. Usually one to want to savor the feelings they emit for each other, he is careful in return. However, due to almost losing her, he feels today is the day to give this to her. He’ll deal with his needs later. Seeing her break a part in his arms is enough. The fact that she is there in his arms is everything. 

Recognizing that he is deliberately provoking her, Reza sighs in ecstasy. Trying without success to have enough brain power to try to hold off her body’s instinctual need to shut down and just enjoy the moment, she tries to form words to stop his ministrations. Over their time together, he knew exactly how to strum her in such a way that she was putty in his hands. Truly, he could make her do or say anything, just to prolong the ecstasy she feels in this moment. Fuck it, she loses all brain power and writhes within his arms. Chuckling wickedly, Joker continues to stimulate her sensitive nerve bundle with his mouth and tongue, making her moan out loud. Thank the Gods that the comm room is soundproof. As she angles her head into him to give him the best angle, he whispers into her ear, “You are mine, Rez, forever and always.” Starting to feel the stirrings of an orgasm she mewls into him, rubbing her core against his erection. “Come for me, babe. Let me make you feel that sweet release.” 

Unable to string together any coherent words, Rez moans, “Mmmphff…” and gasps out his name as she comes just as he nips her with his teeth, ending the sweet torture. Waiting for her to stop shaking as she descends from her orgasm, he holds her against him within his arms. 

Feeling her snake her hand down his pants to cup him through his trousers, he jostles her around to remove her hand and says, “No, babe, this is for you. You can make it up to me later when we are in our quarters.” 

“Jeff…babe,” Rez mumbles against his chest when she calms enough to string a few words together. Raising a hand to grasp his neck lightly to bring his lips down to hers she kisses him passionately. Between little nips of his lips she says, “Love…you…so…much.”

Feeling his heart swelling in his chest with the amount of love he feels for the woman in his arms, Joker pulls away to lean his forehead against hers and closes his eyes. “Never leave me, Rez. You are my life. I can’t live without you.”

“Ditto.”

Feeling his legs start to tremble from standing upright so long without support, he grunts and says, “I have to sit down, babe.”

Pulling away from him, Reza helps him walk to one of the chairs, near his crutches. Taking the chair next to him, she says, “You should have told me.”

“Naw…it was worth it. Watching you lose all control like that never gets old babe…” Joker says grinning smugly at her when she rolls her eyes and leans against his shoulder, still steadying her heart rate from the high he elicited in her from the onslaught of pure desire he made her feel for him. How he did that, she has no idea. No one had ever known to do that to her before him, not that she would have let them. Her nerve bundles in that area were so tightly strung together that after his assault, it would be sensitive for days afterward. Normally, she would only allow it if she wasn’t going to need her biotics for the time it took to lose the extreme sensitivity, but to be honest, the feeling was so acute and exquisite, that she just didn’t have the heart to stop him from achieving his goal to have her lose all control. Either way, he always felt smug for making her feel like she was at his mercy and after clearly scaring him with her near death experience earlier, she felt like she owed him. 

“You know that I’m going to be sensitive for the next few days, now.” Reza says reminding him.

Humming, Joker smirks at her and says, “Trust me, I know. Just promise me that I’m in the shower with you when you wash your hair again. I want to reap the benefits…”

Images of the time he helped her in the shower when she was just as sensitive the last time, she groans into his shoulder and huskily says, “Deal.”

Noticing a flashing button on the comm unit, Joker sighs and says, “I guess we’ve made your father wait long enough. Do you want me to leave, babe?” Shifting uncomfortably from both his hard on and his aching legs, he grimaces and says, “Never mind, I may not be able to…for a while,” as he stretches his legs out to relieve some of the tension in both areas. 

Straightening, she says, “Stay, if my father doesn’t like you being here…to fucking bad. I’m not going to make you move when it could injure you. Besides, there’s nothing we are going to talk about that you won’t find out later anyway.”

Intrigued, Joker nods.

She stands up and straightens her uniform and reddens when her husband chuckles when he notices her grimace while doing so. Rubbing her thighs together, she huffs in annoyance when she notices that she is extremely wet from her early indiscretion. Frowning at him as he continues to laugh at her discomfort, she grumbles, “You get laundry duty, since now I have to change my uniform again.”

“Totally worth it.”

“Ugh…” she says and pushes the button on the comm unit and waits for her father to show up.

30 seconds later, Admiral Steven Hackett appears in his dress blues and Reza straightens and salutes. 

“Commander,” the Admiral salutes his daughter and then notices who else is in the room and says, “Flight Lieutenant.”

“Admiral,” they both say. 

“I wasn’t expecting you to be in the room, Jeff. Do you think you could leave us…”

Reza interrupts her father, “Sorry, Dad, but unless it is mission specific, then I would like him to stay.”

“Fine. How are you, kid? I heard the mission on X57 ended with a bang.” Steven says, his lips twitching.

Rolling her eyes at him, she says, “Yeah, the fireworks were a nice touch. But, I can’t take credit for it. That was all Joker’s doing. He deserves accolades for it, not me.”

Joker laughs, looking at her, “It was your idea, babe.”

“You took the shot.”

“At your command…”

Reza and Joker look at each and smile, completely forgetting that her father is watching them as they bicker. 

“Be that as it may, whether it was your idea, Reza, or your shot, Jeff, it was quite the show. One for the history books, that’s for sure,” Steven says distracting them. “Regarding yesterday’s mission on Presrop…” He pauses when his daughter winces and looks away from him, “Are you okay?”

“Seriously…?” Reza looks back at him and frowns. “You know better than anybody, except Joker, how I feel about what happened yesterday. You used me, Dad. How could you?”

Sighing, Steven closes his eyes and shakes his head. “I’m sorry, kid. I didn’t have much of a choice, but knew that if anyone could bring in the Major peacefully, you could. Before you say anything, I knew he had threatened your life after the trial, but you still were the best choice. I’m sorry if that makes you upset, but I needed you,” and then adds for emphasis, “The Alliance needed you.”

Joker scoffs, interrupting, “Typical bureaucratic bullshit, sir. If I don’t believe you, do you really think that your daughter will?”

Steven grimaces and glares at him for interrupting. Joker just shrugs and turns away from the screen and winks at his wife, who is watching. He huffs out a breath and shakes his head; admittedly his son in law is correct. Using the Alliance card was bullshit. Looking solemnly at the both of them, he says, “Your right,” which make them look up at him in surprise. It’s not often when he admits that, but there’s always a reason behind the decisions made. “However, there are going to be times where I must call upon your experience regardless of how I might feel about it, Rezana. I know you went through hell during that whole debacle, but in this instance, can you truly believe that anyone else would have gotten the same result as you?”

“Probably not.”

“I am proud of you, Rezana, you know that, right? You had to make a tough choice with Major Kyle…both times. I knew that you would make the right one, now. I also knew that if you had to, you would have taken him out. He knew it too, by the way. That is probably why Major Kyle surrendered to you in the first place.”

Knowing her father is right, Reza nods at him. Wanting to stop talking about it, she asks, “Why didn’t you tell me, Dad, about my candidacy for Spectre?” 

Joker jerks his head up and blinks in surprise at the change in topic and this one particularly, “Spectre…?”

Reza looks at him and nods.

“Nihlus told you? I’m surprised.” Steven says worried that his daughter will be upset at the news.

Looking back at her father, she says, “No. I guessed. We were talking just now after the mission and it was something he said. He also said that he wanted to tell me ages ago and that you and David are my sponsors.”

Obviously, it was time to fess up. Steven nods at her, “Yeah. David thought that it was time again for a human to join the Special Tactics and Reconnaissance unit. You are our best candidate, by the way. Not just because of being my daughter, but because of what you have accomplished and experienced in your career, so far.”

“Huh…” Reza says as she starts to pace.

“Are you upset?” 

“Not really. I get why you recommended me, but not why you kept this from me. I’ve been around long enough to recognize when someone is walking on eggshells around me, Dad.”

“Yes, I was never able to put anything past you. You take after your Mom in that way. I could never hide anything from her, either.” He says apologetically. “However, you should know that we were asked not to tell you, or at least not at first.”

“Really? Why?”

“The Council…or specifically the Turian councilor, Sparatus. He asked us not to divulge the secret to you. He was always against the idea in the first place but conceded when he was overthrown by the other two councilors. I think his choice in evaluator had something to do with his objections.”

“So, Nihlus was his choice,” Reza says pursing her lips and remembering their time together since being paired up.

“Correct. He did look mighty smug those first few months when you two weren’t getting along,” Steven says with some sparkle in his eyes. “Now however…”

Reza laughs, “Yeah. He looks like he’s been sucking on a lemon, now that Nihlus and I are working so well together and have become such great friends.”

Joker frowns and shuffles in his seat, distracting Reza, making her look at him. Remembering his diatribe the other day about not liking a Spectre onboard, she says to him, “You know if I become a Spectre, I may need a pilot to fly me around the galaxy. I mean if you can get past your thinking that they are trouble.”

Joker laughs sardonically and says, “Spectres are trouble. But, I guess I can learn to live with it, if you’re a Spectre. Especially, if you need someone to fly your fine ass around,” he waggles his eyebrows at her making her laugh and take the seat next to him. She gently pulls him closer and kisses him, forgetting again that her father is watching. They are always in their own world when they are absorbed with each other.

Steven coughs and rolls his eyes as Joker waves him off and covers their antics with his hand over their faces, making Rez giggle as her husband nibbles on her lips. 

Steven grins and looks away to give them a little privacy. Thinking back to the conversation about the Spectre promotion, he remembers that Sparatus was never a fan of their race having anyone join the Spectre program or even having an embassy on the Citadel, for that matter. It may have something to do with the Counselor’s military service period coinciding with the First Contact War. Or, maybe he just didn’t want an inferior race, as he sees the humans, have a leg up…who knows. Steven’s glad that Nihlus doesn’t have the same prejudice, especially since the two are related. Not many know of their familial ties, but then again, not many know that Reza is his daughter either. It just shows that Nihlus can keep a secret just as well as he can. Clearing his throat once they come up for air, he gets their attention and adds, “I’m glad that you know now. I’m sorry we had to keep your candidacy from you, but you know what it would mean for not only the Alliance, but the human race to have someone represent the Council in this way. The first human Spectre…would be a great thing. Don’t you agree?”

Reza looks back at her Dad and says, “I really haven’t had a chance to think about what it would mean for me, but I will…seriously…and get back to you.” When she sees that her father is about to say something, she adds, “This promotion to Spectre is bigger than just me. I need to talk about it with Joker. He should have an opinion about what it would mean to our marriage. Don’t you think so…being an old married man yourself, Dad?”

Steven’s eyebrows raise and he nods in understanding. Straightening, he returns to a professional manner and says, “Commander,” making Reza straighten, as well. “Good job, today. You too, Flight Lieutenant,” making Joker sit up straighter in his seat and look at him.   
“Let me know the next time you’re on the Citadel, I have some leave coming up, and it would be great to see the both of you.”

“Will do.”

“Good. Take care, kids. Hacket out.” Steven waves before cutting the link.

Reza turns towards her husband who is frowning a bit and brushes her hand along his beard, “Let’s take this to our quarters. I need a shower.”

Joker nods and stands up stiffly, before taking his crutches and walks ahead of her as she follows him out the comm room and down the stairs, heading towards their own sanctuary. Sighing, Reza realizes that this conversation which includes the one about Nihlus is long overdue. Looking forward to at least being alone with him, Reza smiles when he turns back to see if she is following him and he returns one, giving her hope that he’s okay with the information that was discussed moments ago.

{{{}}}

“Well that went well,” Joker says as he crutches into their room.

Walking up to him she stops in front of him to wait for his move. He leans his crutches against the wall opposite of the bed and sits down and pats the seat next to him for her to sit. She sits down and waits for him to speak.

“So…Spectre huh?” Joker says as he takes his braces off.

“Yeah.”

“Big honor…”

“Yep.”

“Huh,” Joker grunts as he stretches his legs out and lays back on the bed to look at the ceiling.

Mirroring his position, Reza says quietly, “I won’t take the position if you aren’t onboard with the idea. You mean more to me than a stupid title.”

Turning his head to look at her, he says, “That stupid title is a big deal, Rez. Even though I know you mean well when you said you needed to discuss this possible promotion with me first, to be the first human Spectre, it's a big deal and a big honor. You’ve earned this…all the missions you’ve accomplished and survived at great odds, all the time we’ve spent apart, not knowing when we are to be together again, the sacrifices that you’ve made for your career…”

Sitting up, she pulls her legs up to sit cross legged as she looks down at him, “None of that means anything if it messes with our marriage. I wouldn’t have married you if I valued my career over being with you. I love you more than life itself. You are my heart and soul, babe.”

“Ditto,” Joker says and smiles at her and entwines his fingers with hers. Curious, he asks, “So, what would it mean to become a Spectre? What about your position in the Alliance? Would you get your own ship? Are you even allowed to be married?” 

“I would imagine being married or not, is fine. I know a couple of Spectres that are married to each other. As far as the Alliance is concerned…I’m not sure. Spectres are above the law, or can be as long as the mission is successful. Not that I follow the rules much…” and pauses to flip her husband off when he scoffs at her statement. He sits up and grabs her other hand to kiss the back of her hand. She smiles at him and adds, “Actually, since it seems that everyone is afraid of Spectres and what happens when one is threatened, it may be enough to come clean with everyone, finally, about our marital status. The threat of lethal operatives backing me up tends to get the word out to potential enemies to not fuck with me or my family. That’s a definite plus and then I wouldn’t have to rely so heavily on my reputation.” 

“I’d like to fuck you,” Joker says slyly, smirking at her. 

Reza laughs and moans a bit when Joker flips her hand over and nibbles at her wrist, slowly moving up her bare arm with his lips, “You’re different…mmm…stay focused Joker.”

“Sorry…” he says pausing to scooch closer to her to unbind her bun from the top of her head. 

“Uh huh…” she giggles when he tickles her side after taking her hair down and brushing it over her shoulders. 

Leaning into her, he starts to unfasten her uniform top and kisses each inch of skin as it is exposed. “So, you are definitely going to need a pilot then. Maybe you can have an Alliance detachment of soldiers who follow you around the galaxy, my name being at the top of the list, of course.”

“Wait babe, we need to discuss one more thing before this goes too far…” Reza says gasping when Joker unhooks her sports-bra and cups her breasts, pinching her nipples drawing an ‘Oh’ from her as she arches into him.

Joker releases her and levers himself back on the bed to lean against their pillows and beckons her to follow.

Reza pulls off her top and tosses her sports-bra to the floor before taking off her boots and socks. Leaving her trousers on, she follows her husband and curls up against him to lay her head on his chest. Shivering slightly, Reza wiggles a little when Joker wraps his arms around her and strokes her naked back and kisses the top of her head.

“Hurry babe, I don’t know how much longer I can wait to be inside of you. I was serious when I said I wanted to fuck you.” Taking her hand, he draws it down to his cock, so she can get the idea that he is ready for her. “I’m about ready to combust.”

Stroking him, Reza decides that they’ve waited this long to talk about Nihlus, what’s another day. So, she takes advantage and unbuckles his trousers and helps him disrobe until he takes over and switches to what’s left of her clothes and strips naked just as he takes off his shirt. Feeling more frisky than usual due to his stimulation of her amp port earlier, and recognizing that she is dripping wet for him; as soon as he lies back, she immediately straddles him. “I need you inside me, now, babe. I can’t wait any longer, either.”

Raising his hands up in surrender, Joker smirks and says, “Go on. Take advantage of me. I’m ready.”

Leaning down to kiss him, she slowly positions him at her entrance and takes him inside of her all the way to the hilt. Whimpering against his lips at the feeling of complete bliss at becoming one with each other, Reza starts to move, grinding herself down upon him. 

Joker groans and grabs her ass as he meets her thrust for thrust. “I’m not going to last long, babe. After being aroused all day watching you and what happened in the comm room...I’m close….oh, so close…mmm…” he says as Reza nips his neck and licks his sensitive spot as they start to fall apart in each other’s arms. Knowing she is sensitive, he blows on her amp port and with a loud gasp, Reza rears up and grabs the head board on each side of his head and rides him faster, her biotics starting to pulse through them both. Joker raises his knees to change his angle within her and Reza arches into him jutting her breasts into his face. Taking advantage, he nuzzles into them, and bites down on one of her nipples, just hard enough to make her cry out. It’s that added bit of pain, which makes her topple over the edge and orgasm around him, taking him with her, as he empties himself inside of her wet depths. 

Calming down enough to talk, Joker kisses his wife’s face; starting with her eyes, then her nose, and then each cheek, before settling on her lips. Pulling away just enough to whisper, he says, “Have I told you yet today how much I love you?”

Reza hums a yes as she leans in to kiss him again. “And, I love you too. Always and forever, babe.”

“Always and forever.”

Reza leans into him for a brief moment longer, loving the feel of him deep inside her. However, knowing that they still are technically on duty, she gets up and stands at the side of the bed, and holds her hand out to him.

Looking up at her, feeling slightly bereft at the loss of being inside her, Joker asks, “What now, babe?”

“I promised you that I would share my shower with you. Are you coming?”

“Fuck, yeah…with your amp port sensitive and the hot water, you become quite the aroused beast, and I’m here to tame you.” Sitting up, he stands and pulls her into him to kiss her senseless. 

Giggling against him, Reza pulls away, “That is a corny line…” and squeals when as soon as she turned away to lead him into the shower, he swats her ass.

“Ooh, you are so gonna get it,” she threatens as she turns on the hot water.

Chuckling wickedly, Joker follows and says, “Bring it on, babe. Bring it on.”

{{{}}}

After the debrief for the unorthodox mission, Captain Anderson looks all over the Normandy for his XO. Not seeing her, he asks ‘Betty Bitchbox’ where she might be and getting an answer, he walks into the mess kitchen completely surprised at seeing her wearing an apron and have her sleeves rolled up while she is making meatballs? What? Hearing her direct the mess sergeants on not to forget the garlic on the bread sticks, he clears his throat catching her attention. 

Reza looks up and smiles at her godfather. “Captain, I need your permission to allow alcohol for dinner tonight to the off duty crew. Two beers each. Not enough to get sloppy drunk.” Seeing the doctor walk in behind the Captain and nudge him aside to check the big pot on the stove to see if it was bubbling yet, Reza smirks and says, “Although, you may want to limit the Doctor to only one. Beer isn’t really her style. She likes Brandy more.” She turns back to her tray and continues rolling out meatballs.

Karin huffs out a laugh, “Hey, I can handle beer like the rest of them. Brandy is for more special occasions.”

“Uh huh.”

Completely dumbfounded at seeing not only his XO but his CMO cooking spaghetti it seems, David just stands in the middle of the little space and stares at them. Karin looks up at him and says, “Don’t just stand there David, there is a lot of bread to butter.” She grabs another apron from the side cupboard and hands it too him. When all he does is stare at her, she waves a hand in front of his face and he blinks at her and grasps her hand. “David, are you staying or going?”

“What’s going on here?”

Reza giggles but doesn’t turn around. 

Karin rolls her eyes and says, “What does it look like? Reza and I are making spaghetti and meatballs, with garlic bread for dinner.”

David looks around the kitchen and says, “Why?”

Reza turns around and snorts, “Why not? The crew has worked hard this past week, plus after Terra Nova, I thought it would be a great idea to celebrate. Do I have permission to serve alcohol with dinner, sir?”

Finally understanding, he smiles at Rez and says, “Two beers. Sounds good.” Turning around to look at Karin, he grabs the apron from her hand and puts it on, “Whatever you need help with, I’m here to serve,” he salutes his friend.

She smiles at him and instructs the mess sergeants to keep the Captain busy by spreading butter on the bread. 

{{{}}}

After Joker opened a ship-wide comm channel, Anderson addressed his crew. “To celebrate a job well done on our successful mission today, we will be having a specially made celebratory dinner served in the mess for those off duty, courtesy of our XO and CMO, who are our chefs for the evening. What are we having tonight, Commander?”

Reza rolls her eyes and answers, “Tonight’s dinner is Spaghetti and Meatballs with garlic bread." She pauses when a round of murmurs goes around the CIC, turning around she sees Joker's hand up. Knowing what he is going to say, she adds, "Yes, Joker, the meat in the meatballs is honest to god, dead cow. I picked some up on Arcturus before boarding the Normandy. This way we can celebrate in style. Speaking of which, the Captain has given permission to have alcohol with our meal. I have enough for two beers a piece. For those on duty, we’ve made enough to go around and it will be waiting for you once you get off duty. Enjoy!”

A loud cheer goes around the Normandy once the intercom chirps off. 

{{{}}}

“Nihlus!”

“Commander,” Nihlus inclines his head, before joining her at the counter that overlooks the overloaded mess tables as she watches the day shift get served their portions of their dinner and pass out the bread. “Do you cook for your crew, often?”

Reza nods at him, and says, “About once a tour. I like to spread the good cheer, especially after a long and tiring mission like we had today.”

Nihlus looks curious at the foodstuffs the crew is dishing out of the family size platters on the table and cringes when he sees what looks like worms getting scooped out. Yuck.

Watching his expression and remembering their ongoing debate about how disgusting human food not only looks but smells like, Reza laughs at him. “Before you can say anything, I got you something as well. Don’t worry, I didn’t cook it…” Reza says when Nihlus is about to ask, “It’s in the fridge, which is where Torana asked me to put it, once I unpacked it from the cold storage unit I had it in before coming on board.”

Nihlus looks at her inquiringly, “Torana…you mean the Turian restaurant owner from Arcturus?”

Reza rolls her eyes, “What other Torana would I be talking about? Do you know of any other Turian restaurant on Arcturus? There is only one.”

“Okay…”

Grinning at him, she bumps his armored shoulder, “I got you your favorite…or at least the dinner that you ordered the most during our stay on Arcturus these past few weeks.”

Looking surprised, Nihlus says, “You got Trevias for me?”

“Yep,” Taking his hand, she drags him into the mess kitchen and takes him directly to the refrigerator and grabs a large sack with DEXTRO foodstuffs written on it. Additional lettering says, PROPERTY OF LT.COMDR SHEPARD. HANDS OFF UNLESS YOU WANT TO GET REALLY SICK OR REALLY DEAD,’ just to make it clear to anyone deciding to eat his food without her consent would regret it, and hands the sack to him.

Giving her a nudge at the warning on the side and seeing her shrug, Nihlus takes the sack of foodstuffs and looks inside and sees that yes, indeed, it is his favorite meal…Trevias. It’s a rare fish only caught on Palaven, steamed to keep in all of its juices and then the meat is taken off the bones and is mixed with vegetables and herbs to create a type of stew. It was delicious and expensive outside of Palaven, but it was always worth the price when it reminded him of where he grew up. Looking at his partner in awe at not only knowing exactly what he liked but had gone to the trouble of getting some for him, was an amazing gift. He sits the bag on the counter and grabs Reza around the shoulders and leans into her and rests his forehead against hers, closing his eyes and breathing her in. Hoping Reza doesn’t know that he is technically giving her a Turian version of a kiss, he holds her for a time and silently thanks Capt. Anderson and Admiral Hackett, for partnering him up with her for her Spectre evaluation. His life has definitely not only gotten more exciting with her in it but more meaningful. Still bemoaning the fact that this wonderful human female is bonded, he decides incurring her wrath for taking advantage this one time is worth the thrashing she will give him. Feeling his plates shift a bit, he purrs as he enjoys her closeness. 

“Nihlus?” Reza says pulling away and looking at him oddly, “Are you okay?”

Fortunately for him, it seems that Reza was not familiar with the Turian kiss, because he was definitely sure that she would have laid him out for initiating one if she did. He smiles, “Thank you, Rezana, this is a kingly gift. You shouldn’t have spent so many credits on me, but I’m grateful nonetheless.” 

“Your welcome, Nihlus…your meal isn’t the only thing I got you,” Reza says smiling up at him.

“Oh?”

“You didn’t think I would get alcohol for the crew and leave you out, did you?” Reza walks over to the refrigerator again and takes out dextro beer. The container also hand lettered with the same warning, she grabs two bottles and hands them to him. “I believe that this is your favorite variety, as well?”

Completely at a loss for words, Nihlus nods at her as he looks over the tall blue bottles of dextro beer in his hands. 

Noting that her Turian friend is having a hard time with words, she grins at him and says, “I’ll take these and grab you a seat. Make yourself at home,” waving at the stove or heat diffuser to warm up his meal, “Come join me at my table when you are done.”

Waving at her as she walks out of the kitchen, Nihlus looks back at his friend and sighs. Adjusting his armor, he tries to calm himself down from his reaction to Reza’s kindness, and busies himself to warm up his stew so he can spend a little more time with her as she plays hostess to her well deserving crew for a congratulatory dinner. 

{{{}}}

Laughing with her tablemates at everyone’s display of camaraderie while getting their dinners and their first round of beers that were being passed around by the mess sergeants, Reza groans when someone starts a round of, ‘Toast…Toast.’ With a nudge from David, sitting to her right and a leg nudge from Joker, sitting on her left, Reza rolls her eyes and stands up to wait for everyone to calm down and notice her. 

Deciding to get the wolf whistles to quiet down, Reza hits her fork against her bottle and asks for silence. Within moments, everyone quiets down and looks at her with smiles on their faces. Raising her beer bottle in the air, she says, “I only have one thing to say after a day like today.” Looking over the people at her table; David, Joker, Nihlus, Kaidan, and a few of the marine detail including Jenkins, she looks beyond at the other tables at everyone’s expectant faces and winks when she sees Doctor Chakwas sitting with the engineers, she yells out, “Adios Mother Fucker!” and takes a sip of her beer. 

A round of ‘Adios Mother Fuckers’ goes around the room at all the tables and everyone laughs and takes a sip of their beers and finishes their meal. Reza smiles and sits down. Seeing David roll his eyes at her choice for a toast, she laughs and nudges his shoulder with hers. Before eating her own dinner, she looks around at the people at her table. Joker is looking at her with pride and amusement. He smirks at her and toasts her with his beer. She tips hers at him in return. This is the life. A successful mission, a great meal, good beer, and the best company a XO could ask for. She smiles and digs into her meal.

{{{}}}

“The police in Rio de Janeiro didn’t have anything better to do than to arrest you and your squad buddies for getting into a fight in a bar?” Reza scoffs, after listening to the Captain tell a boisterous story about spending the night in a drunk tank after the conclusion of his N5 training. 

“Well, to be honest, it wasn’t in a bar. It ended up going through the window of that bar, into the street, and down the block. Let’s just say that my squad and I were a little more than drunk.”

“Clearly…” Joker says grinning, trying really hard to imagine a younger David Anderson getting arrested for drunken disorderly in Rio. 

“Hopped up on your own egos more like…thinking you were all badasses for passing N5 training,” Reza says tongue in cheek as she laughs with all the others when David looks down sheepishly and nods in agreement.

Looking at his goddaughter laughing at his expense, David says grinning wickedly, “Anyway, the Rio jail cell was an experience in itself. I’m sure you are familiar with what I’m talking about, Commander.” 

“What?” Reza says mockingly and lowers her head when Kaidan quirks an eyebrow, Joker chokes and chuckles at her, and Karin, who had joined them after finishing her own meal, smiles behind a hand and winks at her. Nihlus just laughs as he chortles at her facial expression. 

“You heard me. How many times did I find you locked up in those cells after your own training concluded? Hmm, I can remember six separate times. I was only in there once.” David says innocently and grins at her when she glares back.

Waiting for her crew mates to stop guffawing at her, she says grimacing, “It was only five times, I’ll have you know. The sixth time was only for an hour or two. I didn’t actually spend the night.”

Kaidan asks surprised, “You were arrested six times for fighting?”

Slinking into her seat, she grumbles, “Not quite.” At her godfather’s scoff and Karin’s laugh, both knowing the stories, she pouts and explains. “Fine. Three arrests were for guys who challenged me to a spar and when I kicked their asses within minutes, they decided to take the pansy road and attack me afterwards with weapons. After I again whooped their asses, the cops were called when they couldn’t take being beaten by a girl and tried to press charges. The fourth time was for my own protection, when one of the three guys from the earlier arrests decided to take matters into his own hands and gang up on me in a bar with three of his buddies. I put two of them in the hospital before the cops were even called. Apparently, the guy who initiated the attack was never heard from again after I was released,” Reza pauses eyeing her godfather suspiciously. David only blinks innocently at her, thinking what she doesn’t know, won’t hurt her. Apparently, her mother had stepped in on that one and had an old family friend, a mercenary by trade, take care of the guy. The story was that he had taken the guy out into what was left of the Florida Everglades, wounded him, and slathered him with syrup, before leaving him bleeding naked and alone. He was never heard from again…apparently; wild boars have a thing for sugar, too…who knew. Starring down Reza for giving him the stink eye, not giving in to her silent demand for information, she finally huffs in annoyance and gives up. Continuing with her story, “The fifth time was a similar situation to when the Captain was arrested, except it involved my whole platoon. Let’s just say, it got rowdy. That was also after N5 training; grueling six months ever. After N5, you can do anything.”

Sputtering and looking a little intimidated, Kaidan asks wincing, “And the sixth time?”

Looking at Joker briefly before looking at Kaidan and then at the other people listening, she says, “It was when I put a guy in the hospital for touching me. He apparently didn’t understand the word ‘no’ or that I was seeing someone.” Feeling a slight squeeze of her thigh, she entwines her left hand with her husband’s and strokes the back of his hand with her thumb, getting a quiet grunt from him in acknowledgement. “It was after N6 training. I guess the guy decided that I wasn’t worth pursuing, after waking up with a broken jaw and a few cracked ribs, so the charges were dropped and I was let out early from the fabulous accommodations of the Rio jail.”

Looking away again, David knew there was more to the story. It was true that the guy had a change of heart and dropped the charges, but it was Reza’s father who had persuaded the guy to do so. Steven was pretty understanding and didn’t intervene on the other incidents, until Reza did her time by spending the nights in jail, that being punishment enough, but the charge from the guy who was hospitalized for her defending herself against him…well…Steven had every right to be an overprotective father on that one. So, after being threatened with being neutered, the guy decided to drop all charges, happily. 

Wanting to change the topic of conversation after everyone laughed at the wonder that is their XO, Karin asks her, “Rezana, could you sing for us? I haven’t heard you sing in a long time.”

Looking up after turning red from the laughter at her antics in Rio, she notices the mood change and sees that her table mates are looking at her; some with surprise, some with glee, and one in particular nodding in encouragement. Shaking her head, “It’s not the right time.”

David nudges her shoulder with his, “Oh, come on Rez…sing a song, or two, for us.”

“Or three…” Joker says impishly and pouts when she glowers at him.

Frowning at David who winks at her, she grumbles at him, “Tonight is a celebration. I only know love songs and sad songs.”

“And opera and hymns…” David says adding to her repertoire. 

Karin grins, “Then sing us a sad love song or one that you know by heart, I don’t care; I just want to hear your voice. Pretty please…”

Looking around the table, she sees both David and Joker as they smile at her in encouragement and motion to her with their heads, over near the ramp to the sleeper pods. She narrows her eyes at Joker when he winks at her. Hearing a slight huff off to her side, she sees Nihlus nod to her, as well. He’s heard her hum a tune or two in their time together. “Alright, fine…” making Karin clap her hands in glee. 

She stands up and walks with her beer over to lean against the railing to get comfortable. 

Kaidan looks at Joker and his CO, “The Commander knows how to sing?”

Nodding his head, Joker says, “Just wait for it.” 

Karin takes Reza’s empty seat and wraps her fist on the table to get everyone’s attention. “Everyone listen up. Our XO is going to sing for us.” 

The Normandy crew claps in excitement. The Doctor holds up her hand and says, “This is an end to a very long, but successful day, where we get to celebrate a job well done for all of us, and trust me everyone, a little music will top off this delicious dinner that our XO helped prepared for us, before we say good night.”

Rolling her eyes at the doc for her eloquent speech, she smiles and nods at everyone, “This first song is one that I know by heart. And, yes, because I will never hear the end of it, I will sing at least three, tonight.”

Corporal Jenkins lets out a whoop whoop and everyone starts clapping again. 

David says, “Simmer down everyone.” 

And the mess deck suddenly gets quiet. 

Looking over her crew and pausing on David, she gives him a smile in thanks. He’ll remember the song she’s about to sing as the one she sent to Joker after meeting him and getting rejected. Karin knows of it too, since she encouraged her to not give up. She winks at them and smirks a bit when her eyes alight on her husband. He narrows his eyes a little…and when she starts to sing he lowers his head and blushes, remembering exactly what he felt when he opened this audio text from her after rejecting her outright when she asked him out those many years ago and feeling like an idiot afterward. 

~Your Song (by Ellie Goulding, written by Elton John)

It’s a little bit funny…this feeling inside  
I’m not one of those who can…easily hide

I don’t have much money…but boy if I did  
I’d buy a big house where…we both could live

So excuse me forgetting…but these things I do  
See I’ve forgotten if…they’re green or their blue

Anyway the thing is  
What I really mean  
Yours are the sweetest eyes  
I’ve ever seen

And you can tell everybody  
This is your song  
It may be quite simple but…now that it’s done

I hope you don’t mind  
I hope you don’t mind  
That I put down in words  
How wonderful life is…now you’re in the world

If I was a sculptor…but then again no  
Or a girl who makes potions in…a traveling show  
I know it’s not much but…it’s the best I can do  
My gift is my song and…this one’s for you

Ohah Ohah Ohah Ohah Ohhhhhahhhhh OHAH Ohhhhhahhhhh OHAH

And you can tell everybody  
This is your song  
It may be quite simple but…now that it’s done

I hope you don’t mind  
I hope you don’t mind  
That I put down in words  
How wonderful life is…now you’re in the world

Complete silence finishes her song except the whirring and beeps of the ship and she takes of sip of her beer and then raises it up and tips it to the audience. A loud clapping starts and everyone not on duty has found their way back into the mess hall and makes it known that they liked her song. She smiles and nods her head in thanks. She looks over at the people at her table and sees that Karin is wiping tears from her face. David is smiling at her. Nihlus nods at her and salutes with two fingers. Kaidan is looking awed. However, she only has eyes for her husband as he tips his hat to her and winks. She smiles, remembering their time together in the comm room earlier and their quarters. Wanting to let him know just how much she cares about him, she adds the next song, just for him. “The next song is a favorite of mine. I hope you like it…”

~How Long Will I Love You (by Ellie Goulding) 

Mmmmmmmmmmmm

How long will I love you  
As long as stars are above you…and longer if I can

How long will I need you  
As long as the seasons need to…follow their plan

Corporal Jenkins lights up his omni-tool and starts waving it in the air as she sings. Smiling she winks at him as the idea to use their tools rather than lighters, which no one would use on a ship in space, and others on the crew do the same thing. 

How long will I be with you  
As long as the sea is bound to…wash up on the sand

How long will I want you  
As long as you want me to…and longer by far

How long will I hold you  
As long as your father told you…as long as you can

How long will I give to you  
As long as I live through you…however long you say

How long will I love you  
As long as stars are above you…and longer if I may

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm

How long will I love you  
As long as stars are above you…

Looking out at her audience, she sees that almost everyone has their omni-tools lit up. Blushing a bit at their acceptance to her song choice, she bows her head at them and looks over at the table where her family and friends are sitting. Joker has lowered his face to hide the fact that he is wiping the tears from his eyes. The song she just sang meant a lot to them as a couple. It was the song she sang at their wedding to him. David and Karin are also wiping tears from their faces, having been at her wedding. Nihlus nods his head at her again and winks. Kaidan is smiling at her and also nods, but with a twinkle in his eyes…

Deciding she has tortured her husband enough, since he doesn’t like to have emotional bouts in public, she decides to add a song that means something to her. “For those who have had to learn a few hard truths about me today, I think the last song of the night may help you understand me a little better.” 

Her audience gets quiet and she starts…

~True Colors (by Zedd)

Stars fall at my feet, keep me grounded as I reach  
Higher than I see, is there something there for me?

Pulling back the reins, letting go again  
I’m not afraid, I’m not

All my life, one page at a time  
I’ll show you my, my true colors

No, no, no, no I won’t apologize, for the fire in my eyes  
Let me show you my, my true colors, it ain’t no rainbow

A promise with a lie, is broken by design  
What we thought we knew, has been swallowed by the truth

It’s time to light the flame, right before it rains  
I’m not afraid, I’m not

All my life, one page at a time  
I’ll show you my, my true colors

No, no, no, no I won’t apologize, for the fire in my eyes  
Let me show you my, my true colors, it ain’t no rainbow

Something tells me, I know nothing at all  
We’ve escaped our capture  
Yet we have our masters  
And somehow it’s like I’ve waited

All my life, one page at a time  
I’ll show you my, my true colors

No, no, no, no I won’t apologize, for the fire in my eyes  
Let me show you my, my true colors, it ain’t no rainbow

Reza stops and stands. She says with her beer raised, “Thank you Normandy crew for giving your best today. You are truly the best the Alliance has to offer and I’m proud to serve with such a fine crew on this state of the art warship. To the Normandy!”

Everyone with a beer or glass raises theirs and says, “The Normandy!”

{{{}}}

The legend of that day continues onward through classified channels, as the day Alpha Mike Foxtrot, officially became a maneuver in the Alliance combat book, but to any soldier in the field, they secretly named it the Adios Mother Fucker maneuver. Also, Joker’s name went down in history as not only the best pilot in the Alliance but the coolest one, as well. The legend of 'Commander Shepard' skyrocketed that day as well, at not only the savior of Terra Nova, but the best XO in the history of the Alliance who not only fed her crew with spaghetti and garlic bread, but beer too. More than anything that night, their crew felt blessed for being able to hear the angelic voice of their XO, allowing the horrors of the day to wane enough to rest in peace...because unbeknownst to the crew of the Normandy that night, Reza's choice in her last song was almost like a warning that a storm was brewing and Eden Prime was on the horizon…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N 1: I've decided to add 'singer' to Reza's resume. She's a beautiful talented woman who is a badass biotic extraordinaire, elite N7 operative who names her weapons (just wait, the names are coming), snarky, stubborn, pilot charmer, and singer. As far as the songs I've included here; feel free to insert your favorite voice into the lyrics. Some of the songs I'm going to use are sung by men, so obviously Reza doesn't sound like that. But, not everyone loves Ellie Goulding, but the songs I'm adding were picked because of the lyrics or how they fit within my story. Hope you liked the new chapter. 
> 
> A/N 2:  
> Try saying ‘Batarian bastard, Balak’ 10 times fast. I’m sure both Nihlus and Garrus could pull it off without a hitch and purr us to death at the same time….AH, can I bathe in Garrus’ voice, please?
> 
> AAR: means After Action Report
> 
> The thing about the Florida Everglades?...got the idea from the TV series, 'The Glades.' They had a similiar scene in one of the episodes. Inspiration comes from all places...weird right?
> 
> A/N 3: If you have any song suggestions, let me know. I'm writing a scene that needs songs that will be fun for the whole crew to listen to on their journey across the stars while looking for Saren. If your suggestions work with the plot, I'll add them and note it in my A/N.


	9. Foreboding Thoughts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: This chapter is rated 'M' for implied combat scenes and zombies! Not that zombies are scary, but just in case...
> 
> Thanks for all the kudos and comments. This chapter has been a long time coming...the topic/chapters on Eden Prime have been a hard one to figure out and write about. Not my favorite mission. However, since it's the beginning of the story and kind of important, I just needed to work my way through it. Well I have, finally, and it's been spread out into 4 chapters...sort of. You'll see what I'm talking about once you check out this new chapter. Enjoy!

{{{“Good morning. Did you sleep well?” Reza says as she walks over to the mess table to join her marine detail, as they huddle together as though they have a secret. Not getting an answer, Reza frowns in confusion. Stopping at the table, she looks at her marines and they all turn away from her whispering frantically. Wondering if she has something on her face or she is trailing toilet paper on her shoe, she wipes her face with a hand as she looks down at her feet to check. Not seeing anything, she looks back at her detail and puts her hand on the sleeve of Orden’s uniform, “Is everything okay, Chief?”

Orden stiffens from his bent over position and shrugs her arm off as if her touching him hurts. 

“Chief?” Reza says worriedly and reaches out to touch him again and pulls back when suddenly everything goes quiet and still, eerie, like she just stepped into a vacuum. The normal sounds of the ship, the whispering of the crew, and the sounds in the kitchen still. Reza looks around to see that everything and everyone has stopped. “What’s going on?” her voice echoes in the stillness. Goosebumps prickle along her arms and the hairs at the back of her neck bristle. 

Orden turns his head to look at her as if in slow motion and what she sees when he turns around makes her gasp and stagger backward, in shock. What used to be his green eyes are now burned out sockets and his mouth is agape as if he is amidst a scream of horror. Then as if her thought has summoned it, a scream erupts from his mouth as he points at her…a shrill ear rupturing scream that drowns out all thought. 

Reza cringes and puts her hands over her ears. Then the rest of the detail turn to her, also in slow motion and they look the same as the Chief. They also start to scream at her and point. Backing out of the mess area, holding her ears, she scrambles up against the bulkhead and seeing her godfather with his back turned towards her, near his quarters, she gasps out, “David? What’s going on?” Before she can move or breathe, he also turns to look at her and she wails, “Nooo!” upon seeing that he also has burned out sockets and backs away from him as he starts to walk toward her in an unnatural way, his body broken, wailing at her; pointing. Crying, Reza scrambles away and trips over someone behind her. Falling to the floor, she get quickly back to her feet and puts a hand over her mouth and almost retches when she sees who she has bumped into. “Karin…No!” Reza moans in horror when she sees that Karin also has burnt out sockets, reaching out for her, her arms bent at an odd angle. 

Tears streaming down her cheeks, Reza hastens away. As she passes by other crew members, they all turn to look at her and scream, pointing at her. Making her way up to the CIC deck, she is inundated with bodies of the crew as they swarm her, tearing at her, pulling her hair, scratching away at her clothes, making her use her skills of combat to get away from them. With tears running down her face, she is finally able to extricate herself from the horde of lifeless crew members and runs towards the bridge where she hopes to find her husband. Seeing Nihlus and Kaidan standing behind her husband, she sighs in relief and shuts the door to the rest of the ship and locks it before bending down to catch her breath. “Nihlus…Kaidan…Jeff…are you guys okay? The rest of the crew…” Reza stops and shrinks back in the corner of the bridge as Kaidan and Nihlus, or at least what was once her friends turn to stare at her, their eyes burnt out sockets and are also pointing at her, accusingly. “Nooo, no, no, no…oh no,” Reza cries. Then she screams as she sees that her husband has stood up from his chair and is also a burnt out shell. He ambles forward, flanked by Nihlus and Kaidan, and as one they grab her. Fighting like hell, Reza screams again in a desperate plea when the door opens and she sees that David and Karin are there, standing on either side of the open airlock. Scrambling to hold on to something…anything; pieces of Nihlus’ armor; Kaidan’s uniform; Reza fights against her captives as they manhandle her into the airlock, the shield being the only thing between her and the cold vastness of space. 

As one, the corpses of her beloved godfather and mentor and second mother grab a hold of her. Without hesitation they throw her out the airlock. As she floats away, her arms grasping at nothing and what was once her home…her tears freezing to her face as her breathless gasps leave her dying body…her face freezing on the images of her crew accusing her of killing them. At the last moment of her death, she whispers her husband’s name in terror as he takes one last look at her frozen face and shuts the airlock door…forever sealing her fate to the empty blackness of space. }}}  
.  
.  
.  
Reza sits up suddenly, gasping for air, the sheets pooling at her waist and looks wildly around her quarters, not recognizing for the moment where she is. She puts a hand over her heart for fear it’s going to jump out of her chest as the images of her dream flash afore her eyes. The sound of her gasping for breath and the thump of her heartbeat completely drown out the soft voice of her husband as he tries without success to get her attention, being jerked out of sleep from her startled response to her latest dream.

“Rez baby…you’re safe. I’m right here…Rez? Come back to me…” Joker whispers gingerly as he gets up off the bed, raising his hands in supplication, and walks slowly into her line of sight. Still far enough away that his wife can’t attack him if she’s disoriented enough from whatever is going on in her head to give her such a pained and devastated expression. This nightmare seems to be a bad one. He hasn’t seen Rez look so stricken in a long time. Not since her nightmares of Akuze and they were only friends at the time, when she was dealing with the aftereffects of that C.F. of a situation on her own. However, something is off about this one. Joker’s never seen the look of fear that is radiating out of her, or the depth of sadness that is seeping off of her, as well. What the hell? 

Blinking up at him, Rez tries to focus her eyes on her husband…wait…no, no it can’t be, Jeff is dead. He’s another burnt out shell…no wait, that’s not right. Was that a dream? Reza shakes her head to clear it. Oh my gods, Jeff! Tears start to trail down her cheeks… “Jeff?” she says hoarsely, her throat clogging with emotion. “Is that really you?”

“Yes, baby. It’s me.” Joker smiles and comes closer and sits within her reach on the bed to brush the tears from her face. Keeping within eye contact, he cups her face in his hands, trying to soothe her. 

Grabbing his arm, Reza pulls Joker closer to her and she wraps herself around him and squeezes tight. “You’re alive! Oh gods, I thought I lost you!”

“Oomph, babe. Can you lessen your grip…fragile, remember?”

Reza lessens her tight squeeze around her husband’s torso automatically and looks at him as though she’s broken him, “Sorry. So sorry. Did I hurt you?”

“No babe, you didn’t hurt me. Just getting comfortable…are you okay?”

Wrapping her arms loosely around Joker’s neck, Reza buries her head into his neck and shoulder whimpering as the last dregs of her nightmare dissipates into oblivion. “Something just feels off…I’m not okay.”

“Which was it this time? Torfan? Akuze?”

“No…neither of them…it was new.”

“Can you tell me about it?”

Kissing his neck, Reza leans forward to gently brush her lips against his. Feeling some of the anxiety start to ebb away, she cocoons herself against Joker’s chest, soaking in his warmth, while he wraps his arms around her, breathing in her scent. “Just hold me…please. I never tire of being in your arms. I feel safe here…right here…with you,” she whispers against him. 

“Always.”

{{{}}}

Karin unwraps herself from the woman who left her quarters a bit ago and walked right up to her without a word and pulled her in for a hug. They’ve always been close, but it wasn’t often when Rezana showed affection like this. Stepping back, Karin looks at her…really looks at her and notes the haunted look to her eyes. “Are you okay, my dear?”

Grabbing Karin again for a second hug, Reza wipes a residual tear from her face before the Doc can see her and says, “Sure. I just thought it was high time I gave you a hug.”

Karin laughs and shakes her head, “You’re right, it has been awhile. I always liked your hugs.” Hugging her in return, she adds, “Anytime, my dear.”

Reza pulls back and separates herself enough to pull herself back together. She smiles, “Good. I’ll see you later, Doc,” and waves goodbye as she exits out of the medbay.

{{{}}}

“Nihlus,” Reza says as she stops short from exiting the medbay and sees her friend pacing in front of the doors, apparently waiting for her to exit.

Nihlus stops pacing and looks at his partner, “We need to talk.”

Reza looks him over and sees that he’s agitated, more so than normal. He seems distressed, actually, like he is feeling the same sense of foreboding as she. “You feel it too, don’t you?” 

He had resumed pacing and stops again to think through what she just said. He tips his head to the side and looks her over. Feeling self-conscious, Reza looks away from him, her gaze settling on the floor, his intensity making her uncomfortable. 

“Something seems off and I can’t…figure out what it is,” Nihlus says making her look up at him once again.

“I know…” Reza says agreeing with him. 

Not sure what else to say, Nihlus turns around and heads for the stairs that lead up to the CIC, stopping after a few steps and looking back at her. “Let’s meet later after we know more about this mission we have on Eden Prime. Something eludes me and I want to know more about where we are going first before discussing this feeling I have.”

Having read the mission parameters on her omni-tool while getting ready for duty, regarding the beacon found on Eden Prime, Reza nods at him. Taking one last look at her, Nihlus turns back around and heads off. 

Looking around at the crew in the mess and still having the need to check on her friends and loved ones, Reza walks over to the mess counter and grabs a cup of coffee from the mess sergeant, not caring in the slightest that it isn’t the good stuff. Sipping at the hot liquid, she leans against the counter and watches the breakfast scene enfold around her. The day shift crew were just waking up and starting their day. The sounds of metallic clinking, the scraping of plates and the smell of coffee overwhelm her and help to eliminate that eerie feeling from her dream. The normalness of whispered conversations and intermittent laughter of the crew; enjoying that small respite of eating their meals with friends before going about their duty shifts, further dissipates the fog of the nightmare allowing her to start to breathe easy once again. Hearing someone approach her haven, Reza looks up and smiles, “Orden, how are you this morning?” 

Stifling a yawn, Orden looks at his XO curiously and stops in front of her in parade rest. “I am well, Ma’am. And you?” 

“Oh quit that. We aren’t on duty yet. Stand at ease,” Reza waves at him and smiles when he leans against the counter, mirroring her stance after ordering his meal.

Feeling the need suddenly to make sure her crewmates are whole and alive, she asks the Chief sheepishly, “Can I give you a hug, Orden?” 

Orden jerks to his feet and looks at her like she’s crazy and winces a little, not sure what to expect from his XO. “Sure?”

Reza laughs and nudges him in the elbow with her arm before leaning in to briefly hug him, before he can change his mind. Afterward, she pulls away quickly, “I wasn’t going to bite, Chief.”

Looking at her oddly, Orden shrugs and finally smiles at her, “Just checking…”

Before she can say anything else, Corporal Jenkins bounces up to them and cheekily smiles, looking first at his XO and then at his friend. “Do I get a hug too, Commander? I’m a huggy person,” and winks at her.

Reza laughs and hugs him too. Seeing Kaidan staring at them at the back of the mess hall, she waves goodbye and grins, “You guys are awesome. See you later,” she adds taking her coffee cup with her as she walks over to meet up with the gawking Staff Lieutenant.

Richard leans in to Orden and whispers, “Did that just happen?”

“Yeah…I guess it did,” he says as they both watch their XO walk away and go talk to the Lt.

{{{}}}

“Kaidan!” Reza says as she meets up with him and gives him a hug; briefly squeezing him to her, eliminating the image of him in her head as a lifeless zombie from her nightmare. “How are you today?”

Blushing, Kaidan stills as his XO straightens from her impromptu hug and smiles at him. Flustered from her bold affection, he stammers, “Uh…I’m fine Commander…I mean Reza.” Looking at her strangely like she has something growing out the top of her head, he adds, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah…I’m fine. Why?” Reza says as she frowns at him.

Fidgeting awkwardly as he tries to tamp down his reaction to her close proximity, “Uh…because you just hugged the Chief, the Corporal, and me…in front of everyone.”

“So…I feel huggy today,” Reza says, using the Corporal’s wording for how she is feeling this morning. Noting his blush, she asks, “Is something wrong with that?”

Kaidan leans in to her and whispers, “Don’t you think that it may not be appropriate for the XO to hug her crew mates?”

Reza leans back and gasps putting a hand to her mouth and blinks up at him, only now realizing that maybe she’s done something inappropriate as the XO of the crew; when all she wanted was to affirm that they were alive and well, compared to her nightmare. Stiffening to stand as the professional soldier that she is, she says tersely, “I’m so sorry, Lt. I didn’t think to ask you first.” Seeing David emerge from his quarters, Reza grabs his attention by motioning to him to wait for her to join him. Before walking away from the Lieutenant, she adds, “Please inform the Chief and the Corporal that if they want to file a complaint against me, to do so.” Looking at him as his XO should, she adds, “You too, Lt.” She adds, “It won’t ever happen again,” and turns and walks away from him.

Cursing internally for his knee-jerk reaction about following the regulations before all else, Kaidan grabs her arm before she can walk away and says quickly as she looks down at his hand before releasing her. “Please Reza, wait…I didn’t mean to imply anything. Of course, I’m not going to file a complaint. I was just surprised…” Finally seeing that she has a haunted look and is struggling with the emotion, he adds, “I’m here for you, Reza. Anytime you need it. After speaking with the Captain, if you need a hug, I will freely give you one.”

Reza looks up at him and nods, giving him a weak smile. “Thanks…I might take you up on that.”

Kaidan smiles in return and watches her move off toward the Captain and waits until they both disappear back through the door to the Captain’s quarters before joining Orden and Richard at their table with his own meal. Noticing that they are both looking towards the Captain’s quarters, he mentions, “If you want to file a complaint…let me know.” Both men jerk to look at him and frown in confusion. Noticing that, he says to clarify, “You know, for the hugging…”

Corporal Jenkins snorts a laugh and shakes his head, “I’m good, Lt. I never say no to a gorgeous woman who wants to hug me. As I told her, I’m a huggy person.”

Orden smiles, “What he said. I was only surprised that she asked me.”

“She asked to hug you?” Kaidan asks, his eyebrows rising in question, jealousy raising its ugly head. Even though Reza also hugged him, watching her hug Orden and Richard too, was a little heartrending, especially since he thought he had already felt a connection with her after such a short time of getting to know her. 

“Yeah,” Orden says and looks at the Captain’s quarters, again. Looking back at the Lt, he asks curious, “Are you going to file a complaint? She hugged you too.”

Blushing a little at the acknowledgement that indeed people noticed the XO hug him, he shakes his head. “I’m going to have to agree with Jenkins on that one. Besides, I think she needed it. Something is off and she looked like she was only affirming that we were okay.”

“Yeah, that was what I thought, too,” Orden says in agreement.

“What…you guys don’t think she just wanted to hug us…the manly men that we are?” Jenkins says smirking and flexes his arms over the table.

Kaidan and Orden look at his posturing and laugh out loud, earning them a flip off from the Corporal. 

Chuckling at his own antics, Richard looks at the Captain’s quarters again and sighs, “Well, hopefully our beloved XO feels better. If not, I’ll definitely volunteer for hugging duty, again. You can tell her that Lt…you know, should she ask.”

Kaidan laughs again at the young Corporal as he blushes realizing what he just said and smiles wryly, “I think we all would if it came down to it.”

Orden nudges his friend in the ribs for being so obvious about his crushing on the XO and adds, “Copy that.”

{{{}}}

“Rezana, are you okay?” David says as his goddaughter sniffles in his arms after hugging him as soon as the door shut behind them.

Brushing a tear away from her face, Reza says, “Not really.”

“Joker sent me a message that you had another terrible nightmare. Do you want to talk about it?” David says as she continues to muffle her sobs against her second father. 

“Not really.”

Knowing his goddaughter as he does, David pulls back and cups her chin and makes her look at him. Noticing the haunted look, he asks, “What is it? Talking about it can help. I can relate…believe me.”

Blinking the tears from her eyes, Reza looks up at him and pulls away, making his hands drop away. She starts to pace in front of him as he settles himself to lean against the conference table. Pausing in her pacing, she looks at him, “Something just feels off about this mission to Eden Prime. I don’t know what it is…Nihlus feels it too.”

David frowns and looks at her in consternation, “That’s weird, because I don’t feel anything…off, as you say.”

“I can’t explain it, David. I just have this overwhelming feeling that something bad is about to happen,” Reza resumes pacing agitatedly. 

“I believe you. I trust your instincts. After the stuff you’ve been through…” David says folding his arms across his chest.

Turning to face him, Reza lets out a big sigh, “Thanks.”

“Since there’s not much we can do about what you are feeling until we arrive at Eden Prime, I would suggest you eat something, since a cup of coffee isn’t enough,” David says eyeing the N7 emblazoned mug, sitting on the conference table. 

Rolling her eyes, Reza sighs, “I forget sometimes that you know me too well.”

David laughs and stands up to pull her in for another hug, “Well, you are your father’s daughter. Making him eat something other than coffee and a power-bar was always a challenge, too. And, Steven isn’t a powerful biotic, like you. You need to keep up your strength.”

“Thanks, Mom.”

David chuckles and rolls his eyes; it seems that Reza is starting to feel better, now that her snark is starting to show. Checking his omni-tool after receiving a chirp, indicating that he got a message, he waves ahead of him, motioning for Reza to precede him out the door. “Go grab some grub, before your husband eats all the bacon. That was him just now, letting me know that he grabbed you a plate.”

“Oh, good. Will you be joining us?”

“No, I’ll be joining Nihlus in the comm room. He wants to go over the mission brief. Meet us there once you eat.”

Reza turns towards him after exiting his quarters and salutes. “Will do, Captain,” resuming her role as XO.

Saluting in return, Captain Anderson nods at his protégé and walks off towards the CIC. 

{{{}}}

Enjoying the small respite of sitting next to her husband in the mess, holding his hand under the table, needing that small bit of contact as they ate their breakfast; Reza was finally able to relax a little from the foreboding sense she had earlier after waking from that horrific dream. Once it was known where they were headed, Jenkins had lingered in the mess with Orden and Kaidan to tell ribald stories of growing up on Eden Prime, making everyone laugh at his outrageous retelling of his adventures. 

After another round of laughter had died down around their small group, Reza smiles and after looking at the time on her omni-tool she says, “Unfortunately guys, it’s time to get to work. Duty calls.”

They all get up from their table and get rid of their breakfast trays. As one they muster around the elevator, hesitating briefly before separating to start their duty shifts. Having picked up on their XO’s need for comradery, they linger just a minute longer, enjoying the moment. 

Taking advantage of their vacant surroundings, no one else having disturbed their small group; Jenkins looks at his XO and notices that she no longer has that haunted look in her eyes. Since, he doesn’t have any filters, even around a soldier with the reputation that Rezana Shepard has, he grins impishly and pushes his luck once more. “I’m happy to see you smiling again, Commander. However, if you need another hug, I’m game. Huggy person, remember?”

Joker coughs, looking suspiciously at his wife, forgetting for a minute that he probably shouldn’t say anything in public, “What? You hugged Jenkins?”

Reza blushes a little and then laughs when Jenkins grins and waggles his eyebrows at her suggestively, his eyes shining with devilishness. Shaking her head at the gall of the Corporal for bringing up her ‘hug-fest’ from earlier, she grins at him. Cheeky bugger… 

Knowing what his wife had dreamt and recognizing her need for physical contact…she had finally told him parts of it in the shower they took together, Joker winks at her. After noticing that both Orden and Kaidan are also blushing, he chuckles and shakes his head. Ah…it was obvious that his wife had hugged each of them. Wanting a little action for himself, he grins evilly, “Where’s my hug, Commander? I’m ready…” and holds out his arms.

Eyeing her mischievous husband, Reza purses her lips as she looks at him, knowing that he’s teasing her. She leans in to one hip and crosses her arms over her chest and narrows her eyes. The other guys laugh and look at her expectantly. “Don’t push your luck, Joker.”

“Just trying to keep things even, Commander,” Joker smirks.

“Fine,” Reza says and leans in to him and gives him a brief platonic hug, before leaning back. When he gives her a kissy face, she cuffs him at the back of his head gently and rolls her eyes, making the others chuckle at the action. 

“Ow,” Joker says automatically and grins at her.

“Alright…” Reza says shaking her head at her friends as they grin at her, “Let’s get to work.”

As Jenkins and Orden wait for the elevator to take them down to the cargo bay to ready the equipment for their mission, Reza follows Kaidan and Joker up to the CIC level. Before heading off to the comm room to meet up with Captain Anderson and Nihlus, Reza receives a salute from the both of them as they officially report for duty before starting their shift in the bridge. 

{{{}}}

Walking into the comm room, Reza comes face to face with her CO, frowning at the screen currently displaying their destination and sighing in frustration. Uh oh…whatever happened between when she saw him earlier and now…seems ominous? Coming to parade rest, Reza awaits her fate after sneaking a peak at her partner brooding in the corner.

David Anderson turns away from examining the display of Eden Prime, and looks at his protégé. In an offhand manner, David starts out by saying, “Just had a very interesting conversation with your father, Reza. He tells me you know about the Spectre candidacy we put you up for. What concerns me is that you aren’t more excited about it. The Alliance has been pushing for this for a long time. Humanity wants a larger role in shaping interstellar policy. We want more say with the Citadel Council. The Spectres represent the Council’s power and authority. If they accept a human into their ranks, it shows how far the Alliance has come. 

Staring back at her godfather, Reza nods and says, “Yes, I’m aware.” Looking inquiringly at her partner, she adds, “What surprised me about the whole situation was your involvement, Nihlus.”

“I was impressed when I studied the reports from your exploits in your career so far, Shepard. What you were able to accomplish on Elysium, how much you were able to endure during the siege of Akuze, and from Torfan. A grim business that…but you got the job done. That is why I volunteered to partner with you these past ten months; to evaluate you, to work with you, to see for myself what you were…are capable of.” 

“Huh…it just surprised me that you would champion my candidacy, Nihlus, given your family’s opinion on all things human.”

David blinks, he didn’t realize that Reza knew from which family Nihlus belonged, too. Clearly, he underestimated her ability to see through the lines, once again. She must have done her research on Nihlus and discovered that he and Sparatus were related. 

“Not all Turians resent humanity. Some of us see the potential of your species. We see what you have to offer to the rest of the galaxy…and to the Spectres. We are an elite group. It’s rare to find an individual with the skills we seek. I don’t care that you’re human, Shepard. I only care that you can do the job.” 

Reza looks at her partner…her friend, thinking over what he just said. After a few minutes, she bows her head at him, acknowledging his honesty. He bows his in return. 

Observing them, David nods and continues, “Admiral Hackett said that you wanted to talk things over with Jeff, first.” When Reza nods, he sighs. “This is more than your marriage, Rezana. I can appreciate that you wanted to consult with him, but you do understand that this designation would be a great step for the human race. Just think of it…the first human Spectre. A great honor, indeed.”

Reza looks at her godfather and knowing how much the status of Spectre would mean to him, she nods in agreement. 

“Well?” David looks at her, flummoxed when she doesn’t elaborate any further, and looks at Nihlus, who has stopped pacing and is watching their exchange.

Reza shrugs and says, “Joker and I talked and he said the same thing.”

David smiles, “I always knew I liked that young man.”

Moving into her famous stance, Reza huffs, “Uh, huh.” Then she straightens, “Anyway, as long as the position doesn’t screw with my marriage, more so than our perspective careers have already done so, then I would accept, should I be asked. Actually, to be honest, I’m honored to have been picked for such a highly esteemed position. So, thanks.”

David grins and says, “You’ve earned it.”

Looking to her Turian partner, Reza smirks, “Unless, you think otherwise since partnering with me.”

Nihlus chortles a laugh, “No argument, here. I’ve already sent my report to Councilor Sparatus. After this so-called shakedown cruise, I’ll report back to the Citadel and who knows, you and I may become permanent partners. Or at least, that would be my preference. It’s been a trial so far, putting up with you, but I think I can handle it. Being around you for a while longer…a couple years or so, shouldn’t be too taxing on my delicate sensibilities,” he says winking at her. 

“Oh, you wound me. You wouldn’t want peace and quiet in your dotage?”

Nihlus shakes his head in annoyance at the old age quip and smiles, “Nah…too boring.” Reza smiles back.

David sniggers. 

“What?” Reza asks, curious.

“I can just imagine what Councilor Sparatus will think, when he hears from his top Spectre about the human he’s championing,” David says tongue in cheek.

Rolling her eyes, Reza changes the topic of conversation, “So…about this beacon we're picking up. It’s Prothean? That’s got to be a huge find so far out in the Traverse. I would imagine that we aren’t just going to Eden Prime to enjoy the fresh air.”

Right. Back to the mission. David looks back at the display of the planet on the screen. “Correct. We’re making a covert pick-up. That’s why we needed the stealth systems operational. We can get in and out with the beacon before anyone can stop us.”

“Why the secrecy?”

“This comes straight from the top, Commander. Information strictly on a need-to-know basis. Based on the galactic climate on all things Prothean, when something new is unearthed, a lot of tongues start to wag and if we don’t act fast and do something, we could find ourselves in a lot of trouble if we don’t remove it from prying eyes. This is big, Shepard. The last time humanity made a discovery like this, it jumped our technology forward two hundred years. But, Eden Prime doesn’t have the facilities to handle something like this. We need to bring the beacon back to the Citadel for proper study.”

Reza looks at Nihlus, “Ah, so that's why you have joined us on this mission; to represent the Council’s interest in this discovery.”

Nihlus nods in affirmation, “Yes. Obviously, this goes beyond mere human interests, Commander. This discovery could affect every species in Council space.”

“So, keeping this for ourselves…not an option.”

“You humans don’t have the best reputation. Some species see you as selfish. Often too unpredictable, too independent, even dangerous." Nihlus pauses, "Hmm…except for the former, those other descriptions seem to fit someone I know quite well,” he teases as he looks his partner up and down. He chuckles when she rolls her eyes and flips him off.

Captain Anderson smiles briefly at their repartee and continues with their briefing, “Sharing that beacon will improve relations with the Council. Plus, we need their scientific expertise. They know more about the Protheans than we do.” 

“What’s the plan?”

“You’ll be in charge of the ground team. Secure the beacon and get it onto the ship ASAP. Nihlus will accompany you, as well as your team from the past two missions. You seem to have built a good team dynamic. Let’s not screw that up, especially on a mission that is so important.”

“Agreed.”

“We should be getting close to Eden…”

Joker interrupts them with an urgent call, “Captain, we got a problem.”

“What’s wrong, Joker?”

“Transmission from Eden Prime, sir. You better see this.”

“Bring it up on screen.”

A grainy, static filled vid starts playing, showing a squad of marines, clearly in the middle of combat. Weapons fire and explosions in the background make the one holding the camera jumble to the side behind cover. A startled and injured soldier leans into view and starts to give a SITREP, that they had been attacked by an unknown force. Smoke, fire, and charred bodies litter the scene ahead of them. Then, a strange menacing humming tone, obviously unnatural, starts thundering over the squad, through the audio of the transmission. They can see that some soldiers are covering their ears, others are screaming in pain, while others only stare in horror at the sky. Clearly, the noise affects people differently. Suddenly, it gets dark, as a large ominous presence creeps in from above, overshadowing them. Their facial expressions are varied; awe, horror, disbelief, but overall…fear. Whoever is holding the camera pans up for a few seconds and then suddenly the whole angle cants to the side as if the one holding it has been killed. A female marine in pink heavy armor yells, ‘Lieutenant! We have to go!’ The panicked Lt. blinks in surprise, having frozen in fear, and babbles incoherently before standing up, making himself a prime target. Before, pinkie can yell at him to get down, he screams and blood hits the camera. ‘Dammit! Everyone move out!’ pinkie yells again, clearly taking charge by not only getting into her squads’ faces but even physically forcing them to obey by grabbing at them to follow her. Just before the screen goes to static, the camera pans to the side again, as if the soldier holding it has been rolled to the side in their shuffle to get out of there; showing the feet of several of the marines moving away and what was left of their lieutenant’s fractured face.

“Everything cuts out after that. No comm traffic at all. Just goes dead. There’s nothing…” Joker adds after the screen goes static and turns off. 

Captain Anderson looks around at Reza and Nihlus as they stare at the blank screen “Reverse and hold at 38.5.”

Joker rewinds the vid to the designated time slot and they stare at the image of when the camera was panned up into the sky to capture the ship that had descended around the squad. It looked like a gigantic metal hand looming out of the sky, with lightning coming out of it. No wonder the squad was scared. That…whatever it is, did not look friendly. 

“Status report!”

“Seventeen minutes out, Captain. No other Alliance ships in the area.”

“Take us in, Joker. Fast and quiet.” Looking at the both of them, Anderson adds, “This mission just got a whole lot more complicated.”

Nihlus nods, “Perhaps. A small strike team can move quickly without drawing attention. It’s our best chance to secure the beacon.”

Captain Anderson tilts his head to the side towards the exit, “Grab your gear and meet us in the cargo hold.” Nihlus nods and leaves to go get ready. Then Anderson turns towards his protégé who is studying the image on the screen. “Tell Alenko and Jenkins to suit up, Commander. You’re going in.” When Reza nods and turns around to do just that, Anderson puts out a hand to stop her. “I seriously hope that your earlier apprehension is mistaken, Reza. But, if not, please be careful.”

After looking at the image again at the mysterious ship, Reza nods at her godfather, “Roger that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hope you enjoyed my interpretation of the scenes in the game before Eden Prime. I'm on a roll now. I have three more chapters on deck. Just editing to do before I post.  
> 1\. Eden Prime proper,  
> 2\. Waking up after the beacon mind scan, and  
> 3\. Grief over losing her squadmates/friends.  
> Plus, some more Joker/Reza goodness and Kaidan torture. Ah, poor Kaidan. :(  
> No worries to Kaidan fans, he will soon be brought into the fold and later...much later, he will have his own goodness. :)


	10. Sacrifice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: This chapter is rated 'M' for language and combat scenes. 
> 
> Sorry, for the long wait on this one. Eden Prime is my least favorite mission in the Mass Effect trilogy. I had thought that I had finished it but it bugged me, so I trashed it, and started over. Enjoy.

{{{}}}

After leaving the comm room, Reza hurries through the CIC, past the cacophony of voices of the navigation team as they get ready for their incursion into Eden Prime, to inform the Lt of their mission. As soon as she enters the bridge, she announces her orders, “Lieutenant Alenko…suit up. Grab Jenkins and meet me in the cargo bay for the mission brief.”

Kaidan locks down his station and stands. “Aye-aye, ma’am,” he replies and salutes before hurrying off. 

Pausing to look back at the personnel busy at their posts, not paying her any attention, Reza gently places her hand on Joker’s shoulder and leans over to kiss his cheek, not wanting to distract him. “Love you, husband.”

Still far enough from Eden Prime to use autopilot, Joker switches it on, and grabs his wife’s hand before she can move away. Looking up at her, he pulls her down to kiss her; needing that last bit of contact between them before their mission. After lingering upon her lips, he pulls away long enough to whisper, “Come back to me, wife.”

Kissing her husband once again, Reza moans, “Always.” 

“I love you, too,” Joker adds as he squeezes the hand he’s holding and releases her. 

Smiling, Reza brushes his bearded cheek with her hand before stepping back. Then she taps her lips with two fingers; their silent kiss gesture which means much more than just a kiss, and turns away to hurry down to the cargo bay to suit up for the mission. 

His eyes lingering on her as she walks away, Joker adds quietly, “Stay safe.”

{{{}}}

Adjusting the gauntlets of her precious N7 Onyx armor, Reza turns to grab her weapons to clip them to her harness, when she sees that Nihlus is waiting for her. Making a quick check of her assault rifle, Reza asks as she makes a couple adjustments to her scope, “What’s up, Nihlus?”

“After talking with Captain Anderson, I’m going to go down first. I’ve asked to be dropped off separately from your team. Maybe we can find out more about what we are coming into if we approach it from two sides.”

“Who are you taking with you?”

“No one. I’m going alone.”

Reza looks up at him, her eyes wide, “Nihlus…no! I don’t think that’s wise. As you said, we don’t know what we are getting ourselves into. At least let me come with you. I trust that Alenko can lead his own team apart from us.”

Shaking his head, Nihlus places his hand on her shoulder and leans in closer to lay his forehead upon hers, breathing in her scent. “No, Shepard. I move faster on my own. Something feels off about what is happening down there. You said you felt it too. You are safer if you stay with your squad.”

Reza pulls away and agrees, “Exactly. You shouldn’t go off alone. What if you need someone to watch your six?”

“Let me watch your six, for once.”

“Nihlus…”

Nihlus shakes his head, not willing to budge on his decision to go off alone. He knows she’s right. Going off without someone to watch his back, is dangerous, even for a Spectre extraordinaire like him. He smiles at the nickname that Reza had started to call him after working with him for several months. Nihlus pulls out an OSD data chip and hands it to her, “Take this. It’s a copy of my official evaluation of you for Spectre. I wanted you to have one. I’ve already sent the original to Councilor Sparatus. Captain Anderson and your father also have a copy. It…also has a final message to you…you know…if something were to happen to me.”

Reza looks at the chip and then looks at him confused for a minute. Then as realization dawns on her, she gasps, “Nihlus…no.”

“Just in case…” Nihlus whispers as he pulls her in for a hug, taking one last draw of her coconut scent...this scent that has driven him crazy for the past ten months since meeting Reza for the first time. As the warning bell rings throughout the ship that denotes that they are 5 minutes out from their drop into the combat zone, Nihlus pulls back once more and cups her face with his hand. “Your husband is one lucky bastard. If not for him…well…” Nihlus huffs at the irony of finding his mate so late in life. And, the worst of it is, she’s not even available to him. Not that marriage would have stopped him, it’s the fact that she’s totally in love with her bond mate and could never be truly happy without him. Her happiness is the reason he never did anything about his interest in her. Well, that and she would have killed him. Another aspect to her that he finds enduring. She’s a warrior…honor bound by love and courage…that is what makes her truly an amazing woman. Just having the chance to know her, talk to her, work by her side, and call her friend…was what made his life whole and meaningful. He knows that now. If his prediction that this mission will end as bad as he thinks it will, he has no regrets. It’s because of Rezana Shepard…his friend and partner…that’s made his life mean something. If it comes down to it, he would gladly give his life to save hers. That is why he’s decided to go off alone…without her. “It’s been an honor, Commander.”

With tears in her eyes, Reza looks up at her friend, knowing that he’s saying goodbye. Nodding, Reza grabs the cowl around his neck and pulls him down to rest her forehead upon his. She may not know what it means to him, but she knows it’s a sign of respect. “Likewise.” 

Nihlus hesitates only briefly to savor the moment and then pulls away to ready for his insertion after the pilot pulls the ship into position. Reza grabs his arm, making him pause momentarily, “If we both make it through this…I’m kicking your ass for scaring me.”

Laughing at her brazenness, Nihlus grins as his heart swells at seeing her as the fierce warrior woman that she is. “You’re on.”

She smiles at him. Taking this perfect image of her with him, he gives her a two fingered salute and as Joker announces the first drop off point, he moves off with purpose as the ramp lowers into position. Taking the shotgun from its harness, Nihlus motions to the Captain and steels his emotions as he makes his combat drop onto Eden Prime.

{{{}}}

Roping down onto their own drop-off location, Reza unhooks from her carabiner and motions to the marine on the ramp that she has landed safely and moves away as Alenko and Jenkins follow her to the ground. Moving off to get their bearings, she waits for her squad to give her the signal that they are ready to move out. After watching the Normandy lift off, she follows its flight path until it passes a drift of smoke up ahead of their position. 

Seeing Nihlus off gave Reza a moment of pause and almost overwhelmed her with emotions she shouldn’t have before mission, but as the Captain gave the brief about the beacon, she was able to tamp them down enough to focus. Clearing her mind, she motions for her squad to move out towards the smoke as soon as they ready their weapons. 

They move off with her on point; Alenko watching her six and Jenkins in the middle, at the ready to scout ahead, if needed. After a quarter of a mile, Reza gestures the squad to hold as they round a bend in the hunting trail they’ve been following that opens up into a large clearing. On one end, there’s a cliff that overlooks the valley below and on the other side an entrance to another trail that leads off into the forest; a sign giving directions to the tram station about 3 km to the northeast. 

What would be in normal circumstances a beautiful vista is now marred by smoke and the smell of burning flesh; which is a scent you never forget. The source of the smoke that they were following is coming off a few burning bodies near the edge of the cliff and it was just the beginning to the nightmare they’ve found themselves in. Parts of the valley below are on fire. Once a thriving colony, Eden Prime is now a shell of what it once was and obviously what had happened here was already in full swing before they had even gotten news of the conflict. After seeing no apparent danger, Reza gives the go ahead to check their surroundings to her squad, making sure that Jenkins stays away from the bodies. 

However, Jenkins is no longer paying attention and is standing in the middle of the clearing staring at the devastation of his home, his weapon dangling off to the side. “Oh my Gods…what’s going on? Are those bodies?” 

Sighing, Reza stops beside the devastated Corporal and is about to distract him when Alenko joins them and mutters, “Smells like smoke and death,” making Jenkins wince as he looks around the clearing with glassy eyes. It’s obvious that he’s going into shock. 

Switching her focus to Kaidan, she gets his attention and shakes her head once and points at Jenkins. Looking at the young Corporal, Kaidan reddens at his utterance and nods in understanding that he should have been more observant of his distress.

Thinking she better distract Jenkins fast, Reza grabs Jenkin’s rifle from him and molds his fingers around the hand grip, and takes his other hand to hold the barrel, nestling it against his chest. This is the correct way to carry a weapon while on patrol…a combat ready stance that should be ingrained into him as an Alliance Marine. Lowering her voice, she gets into his face and gives a command, “Move out, soldier.”

His training kicking in, Jenkins blinks at her and barely nods, his eyes still glassy. He does follow her though as they head toward the trail leading away from the horror of the valley below. 

As the trail they are following comes upon another clearing, they pause taking in the scene. This one is untouched. This clearing is cut in half by a stream; a waterfall on one end. Light from the sun has been filtered through by the trees, making the water glow. The dew on the grass and the sweet smell of spring, which is still present, almost makes them forget what they’ve already witnessed. 

Briefly distracted by the calm setting, Reza jerks and almost pulls the trigger on her assault rifle when a strange creature comes out into the sunlight, floating above the surface of the water. 

“What the hell is that?” Kaidan exclaims suddenly, breaking the eerie silence. 

The creature in question, that has surprised them looks a lot like a hot air balloon for the sick and twisted. It has a large bulbous sack of air on top with a box like body and four spindly legs dangling down as it bobs its way across the stream looking for bugs. 

Jenkins jerks out of his stupor and looks at the strange creature, watching it as it floats past, completely oblivious to them as they intrude upon its grazing. “Gas bag. It’s harmless.”

“It may be harmless, but don’t shoot it if you can help it. I’ve heard they explode and drench anyone in a radius of ten feet in greenish goo. Plus, the smell of that goo…ugh…it will drive away all your hopes and dreams of getting laid in the near future.” Reza explains, a hint of crass in her voice. 

Jenkins looks at her and suddenly laughs; be it strained and a little hysterical. “Where did you hear that, Commander?”

“What…it’s not true?” Reza asks innocently, her lips twitching as she sees Kaidan is suddenly finding a plant on the side of their path extremely fascinating, a hand covering his mouth. 

“Oh it’s true alright. I was just curious why you added that last part.”

“Just wanted to lighten the mood, Corporal…it worked, didn’t it?”

Jenkins looks away sheepish, “Yeah, it worked. Thanks, Commander. I guess I lost perspective for a bit.”

Moving up to him, Reza lays her hand on his arm, “I know this looks grim, Corporal, but you have to know that you’re here for a reason. If anything…to make all this tyranny disappear,” and when he nods, she adds, “You’ll be alright.”

Jenkins smiles and takes a big breath to clear his head. Straightening, he suddenly grins at her. “You know, if you’re still feeling huggy, Commander…I could use one right about now.”

“Pfft…” Reza exclaims and rolls her eyes, cheeky bugger. Hearing a low chuckle behind her, she glowers at her Lieutenant who is no longer hiding his amusement. Looking back at Jenkins who has a shit eating grin on his face, she huffs. There’s no point in getting annoyed with him. Not after what happened that morning with all the hugging and after seeing the destruction behind them. She shakes her head at him, “You’re incorrigible.”

“Yes ma’am.”

She grins. Straightening, she readies her rifle and looks on at her squad who do the same thing. “Alright…let’s get on with this.” Giving the order to Jenkins to take point, they head out in the direction of the tram station. 

{{}} 

After pausing when Jenkins gives the gesture to hold at the next clearing, Reza gives the go ahead motion once they determine nothing is amiss. As she looks behind her to motion to Kaidan to flank her, they are suddenly surprised by four drone-like entities as they fly into the clearing from the other side. “Take cover!” she yells just as the drones start firing on Jenkins’ position before he can find any. Both she and Kaidan react instantly by flanking the drones, and firing upon them, but not before Jenkins is killed point blank. Shock and grief suddenly overwhelming her, she takes out her rage on two of the drones and smashes them together with enough force that they explode and drop to the ground in a bunch of sparks. Also, reacting upon instinct, Kaidan takes out the last two drones; one with a tech attack and the other with his pistol. 

Motioning for Alenko to examine Jenkins after determining they are clear of any other threat for the moment, Reza walks over to where the drones had fallen and drops to her haunches to check over what is left of them, never having seen their ilk before. 

Marking the location of the drones’ wreckage and Jenkins’ body on her omni-tool and sending a quick message to the Normandy, Reza sighs and readies herself before standing and moving over to Alenko’s position, already knowing what he will find. Seeing Kaidan’s hand shake as he closes Jenkins’ unseeing eyes, she steels herself and pulls him towards her when he stands up. “He deserves a proper burial, but right now we can’t afford the time to stop.” When Kaidan looks at her, about to disagree, she shakes her head. “Lieutenant, I need you to focus, soldier. Can you do that?” Needing him to acknowledge her, she tightens her grip on his armor, needing something to hold on to, to help her come to terms with the death of their friend’s untimely death and move on with the mission. 

After staring down in horror at Jenkins’ lifeless body, Kaidan jerks his head to stare at his XO and notices the unshed tears in her eyes as she pulls away. She’s obviously barely holding it together, but is otherwise forcing herself to use her training to take control of the situation and to pull him away from his own grief, instead of focusing on hers. Knowing exactly what she is doing, he whispers hoarsely, “Yes, ma’am. I’m fine.” Then he straightens and also reverts to his Marine training to compartmentalize his emotions during a mission. “Upon your orders, ma’am,” and pulls his pistol from its holster, readying himself for what is to come. 

Also readying her assault rifle, Reza gestures to him to parallel her as they continue forward towards their destination. 

{{{}}}

Working in tandem, Reza and Kaidan cautiously make their way forward; totally in sync with each other and with deadly efficiency, as well. They take out their fair share of drones, before noise ahead draws their attention. 

Just as they crest a hill, a familiar pink armored soldier grabs their attention by running towards them from the other direction. This must be that same soldier Reza had dubbed ‘pinkie’ on the vid message they watched prior to their mission here on Eden Prime. Other than pinkie’s color choice in body armor, this soldier had impressed Reza from her actions to keep her squad together. Now, however, it is clear that pinkie was alone. Whatever had transpired since they had received the message, now resulted in the loss of her entire squad? Her heart aching for this lone soldier, Reza knows exactly how that can feel. Just as she is about to signal Kaidan to follow her, they hesitate long enough to watch pinkie pull a grenade from her pack midstride and throw it behind her at her pursuers; two drones. Right as it hits them, she dives behind cover as the blast takes them out. As the smoke clears, a third drone and a mechanical robot move in to cut off her escape. Motioning to Kaidan to take care of the drone, Reza catches the mech with a powerful biotic throw which slams it against the rock wall behind it, exploding into a shower of sparks and white liquid. 

Once Kaidan takes out the drone, they check their scanner to see if any other hostiles are present in their immediate surroundings and not seeing any, they come out of cover and walk down to meet up with the pink armored soldier, gasping on the ground. 

“That was impressive,” Reza says as she offers her hand to the young woman and pulls her up to stand. 

Slightly shocked at watching what was left of her attackers explode in two separate detonations but also at the two soldiers who have joined her, Ashley only nods at them as she tries to gulp in much needed air. She had been running for quite some time. Taking stock that she is in one piece thanks to the soldiers in front of her, she looks them over. One is a man with dark hair and eyes the color of honey, broad shoulders, and apparently a biotic as his barrier is just now dissipating. Even though he’s quite the looker, her attention is riveted to his companion who is also quite striking. A slight woman with dark hair and lavender eyes, this soldier is different. She exudes confidence and has an aura around her that makes it clearly known that she is the one in charge. Although, after looking her over, she seems vaguely familiar for some reason. Running her eyes over the woman again, she pauses when she sees the woman’s armor. There’s an N7 symbol emblazoned on the lapel of her chest-plate. That by itself confirms where Ashley has seen her before. 

Blinking in shock, Ashley wonders how in the world this legend of an elite Special Forces Alliance officer is here on Eden Prime, of all places, but has also just rescued her from imminent death. Recalling that this woman had spoken to her, she stammers, “Gun…Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams, ma’am, of the 212.” Before the woman can respond she gushes out, “You…you’re Com…Commander Shepard.”

Reza sighs and looks at Kaidan and shakes her head. “I guess my reputation precedes me.”

Kaidan looks away and smiles, that’s an understatement of the decade. It’s obvious that the Gunnery Chief has impressed the Commander with her bravado of a few minutes ago. Taking out those drones like she did was damned impressive. Taking a page from his XO’s playbook, he asks the Gunnery Chief who is still staring at the Commander in awe for a status update. “SITREP, soldier.”

Ashley blinks at him and notes his rank on his armor and straightens to parade rest, her assault rifle at the ready. “We were patrolling the perimeter when the attack hit. We tried to get off a distress call, but they cut off all our communications. I’ve been fighting for my life ever since.”

“Where’s the rest of your squad?”

“We tried to double back to the beacon. But, we walked into an ambush. I don’t think any of the others…I think I’m the only one left.” Ashley’s shoulders droop and she lets her weapon hang at her side in defeat. 

“You abandoned your squad?” Kaidan accuses without thinking.

Ashley straightens and replies vehemently, “No! We held our positions as long as we could, sir.” 

Having allowed the Lt to take over the conversation regarding finding out what had occurred here, Reza jerks her focus to Kaidan after his accusation and shakes her head quickly and looks pointedly at the Chief. 

Understanding instantly that his careless words of accusation were the wrong thing to say, Kaidan inwardly grimaces. He fucked up again, just like his careless observation when they landed on Eden Prime. Kaidan blushes with embarrassment, but quickly straightens and nods at his Commander in understanding. He is about to say something that soothes the distraught Chief in front of them, when he’s interrupted. 

“The Geth overwhelmed us!” Ashley blurts out as she had started to pace in agitation, not having seen their silent communication.

Kaidan frowns not believing for a second what the Chief had described as being the cause of all the devastation. After looking at the remains of the drones and the ‘Geth,’ apparently, that the Commander had destroyed, he rubs the back of his head and wonders aloud to no one in particular. “The Geth haven’t been seen outside ‘The Veil’ in nearly 200 years. Why are they here now?”

Ashley stops her pacing, “They must have come for the beacon. The dig site is close. Just over the next rise. It might still be there.”

Still impressed by the Chief’s actions just now and earlier on the vidcam footage, Reza makes a quick decision. “We could use your help, Williams. Will you join us?” 

“Aye-aye, ma’am. It’s time for some payback.”

Reza looks at the young Chief and shakes her head, understanding exactly what is going through her head right now. Stepping forward, she lays a hand on Ashley’s shoulder, “Don’t go off halfcocked because you’re pissed at losing your squad. There will be time to exact vengeance upon them. I need you to focus, soldier…on the here and now. I need you to keep a level head and follow orders. Do you think you can do that?” 

“But…” Ashley interjects, looking angry. The pain of losing her squad mates has overridden her training to automatically follow orders given. 

“Believe me…you don’t want to do what I did. Torfan ring any bells?” 

Ashley looks down and grimaces, “I understand, ma’am. I just…”

“Stick with me Williams; I’ll make sure you get your chance. Someway…somehow…we’ll make sure that the lives sacrificed here today will not be in vain. We’ll get our vengeance.” 

Ashley looks at the woman in front of her, assessing who she is and what she stands for. Of course, she has heard of Torfan…everyone in the Alliance has. Grimacing, she looks from the Commander to the Lt. and recognizes the look of sadness cross his face before he straightens and nods his head at her. Familiar with the standard infiltration squad setup, she finally notices that they’re missing their third person. It’s obvious that the Commander is not just referring to the loss of the 212, but also about their lost squad mate. Straightening into a combat stance, Ashley nods at the Commander in understanding and replies, “Yes ma’am.”

“Good. We’ll move forward in a standard inverted ‘V’ formation. I’ll take point. We are currently on radio silence with our ship, however, I need to report to my Captain the change in status.” Pointing at Kaidan, Reza introduces him, “This is Lieutenant Alenko, my head of Marine detail. Just in case we get separated, use our transmission vector on our squad channel. Kaidan set her up.” 

“Aye-aye, ma’am.”

Reza walks away from them to quickly inform the Captain of what has occurred since they landed on Eden Prime and the coordinates of both the beacon’s location and Jenkins’ body. Once done, she rejoins her new squad and just as they start to move out towards the location of where Williams pointed the beacon to be, they are interrupted by Nihlus.

“Change of plans, Shepard. The beacon has been moved. There’s a small spaceport up ahead and the tram station leads directly to it. I’m going to check it out. Meet you there.” 

“Roger that, Nihlus. Stay safe.”

Nihlus replies, “Always.” He then adds conspiratorially, “Can’t have the great Commander Shepard worrying after the Spectre extraordinaire. I have a reputation to protect.”

“Harhar…smug Turian bastard,” Reza responds, rolling her eyes. 

Nihlus chortles over the comm briefly in response before switching off his comm. 

{{{}}}

After confirming that indeed the beacon was moved from its original location, finding two scientists that had survived the attack from the Geth invasion, by hiding, and locating the whereabouts of the tram station ahead, they were suddenly attacked from behind by strange creatures. After killing their attackers, Reza and her squad took a few minutes to assess their new foe. They were human-shaped creatures, with scarred burnt out eye sockets, no intelligence, just hollowed out mindless ‘husks,’ with one purpose; destroy all organic beings at all costs. They were created by gruesome devices called ‘dragon’s teeth’ that the Geth had left behind. The ‘dragon’s teeth’ device looked like a tall icepick that impaled living hosts and somehow altered them over a period of time. It replaced organic tissue with cybernetics making it a gruesome human hybrid that if you let it get close to you, it would attack you and eventually explode into greenish slime that was acidic, efficiently destroying your shields making you vulnerable. 

After biotically pulling off one of the husks from Williams after it had jumped on top of her, Reza had had barely enough time to put up a barrier to shield the three of them when the husk retaliated by suddenly exploding. Taking out the last husk just awakening off of its device with her trusty sniper rifle, Reza exclaims loudly, “Well..that fucking sucked!” Turning around after determining that they were no longer in harm’s way, she assesses her squad mates looking for injuries. “Are you guys okay?”

Kaidan holsters his pistol and after also affirming they were clear of hostiles for the moment, he nods at her.

Ashley on the other hand is gasping in shock, looking in horror at the puddle of greenish goo that is all that is left of the husk that attacked her.

“Williams…are you okay?” Reza asks as she stands in front of Ashley to distract her from what just happened.

Ashley blinks and looks at her blankly. Then she suddenly shakes her head as if to clear it, straightens her stance, and nods. “Yes ma’am. Thank you for saving me.”

Reza smiles at her, “That’s what we do, Williams. We’re a team…we watch out for each other.”

Before Reza is able to dole out orders about moving ahead, one of the scientists runs out of their shelter and starts spewing doom and gloom behavior; technically freaking the fuck out. Making a quick decision, Reza deals with the situation. 

“Do you really think you needed to knock him out by hitting him, Commander?” Kaidan says quietly after she rejoins them at the edge of the clearing that leads to the tram station. 

Reza sighs and looks at Kaidan in resignation. “He was spouting nonsense, Kaidan. I’ve seen people go off the deep end quickly after surviving something like this. Since we can’t leave anyone behind to monitor him and make sure he doesn’t lose it and kill his fellow scientist, he needed to be silenced. He’ll be fine as soon as his medication kicks in. Should I have killed him, instead?”

Kaidan frowns, not having thought that far into the situation. Coming to the same conclusion, knowing a thing or two about post-traumatic stress symptoms, he agrees that although drastic, it seems that Reza’s quick action may have been appropriate in this instance. “No. I guess knocking him out was the better option.” 

“Glad we can agree on that. I don’t need to add another notch of crazy lunatic to my list of kills, thank you. I’m going to scout ahead. Be back in five,” Reza says and moves off down the path towards their next destination. 

Ashley looks at the stricken Lt, “Is she always like that?”

Kaidan nods. 

“I like her.”

Kaidan smiles and nods, agreeing with her. “Yeah…our Commander is an amazing woman.”

Reading into his statement that he’s not just speaking about her as a fellow soldier but as a woman, Ashley grins. It’s obvious that the Lt has fallen for the great Commander Shepard. Before teasing him about it, they are interrupted by a loud shot reverberating out into the distance.

Reza clicks open her squad channel, “Lt, rally north of your position about half a klick and rendezvous with me. I heard something.”

“Roger that,” Kaidan replies after receiving the coordinates on his omni-tool and he and Ashley move out. 

Just as they meet up at the edge of the forest that borders the tram station, they stop to gawk at the sight in front of them. 

Ashley exclaims, her voice in a near panic, “What is that…off in the distance?”

“It’s a ship. Look at the size of it!” Kaidan exclaims in an awed voice. 

Reza unclips her sniper rifle from her harness and looks through the scope at the large ship hovering in the atmosphere ahead of them. It looks like the same ship from the vidcom footage they received. The large cuttlefish shaped ship streaking lightning across the vast expanse of the hull was slowly rising into the sky leaving a loud ominous booming thunder in its wake. 

Tracking the ship as it gets smaller leaving the atmosphere, Reza notices movement out of her periphery and notes several hostiles waiting for them, below. Quickly informing her squad mates, they take them out. 

{{{}}}

After clearing out the few Geth and husks that were left behind and giving directions back to the scientist camp for the few remaining humans they found near the smoking ruin of the tram station, Reza is reporting their status to Captain Anderson when Kaidan grabs her attention. 

“Commander…its Nihlus,” Kaidan says quietly as he joins her at the edge of the platform. His facial expression is one of empathy and immediately Reza feels as though the air has been sucked out of her and her heart aches. Following his line of sight, she sees a body off to the side. 

Gasping, Reza whispers, “No…” and rushes over to kneel down next to Nihlus and although she knows that there is no hope, checks for a pulse. Covering her mouth with her hand, she immediately tears up at seeing her partner’s crumpled body. The grief that she’s held back since Jenkins died slips out and tears slide down her cheeks as she grieves.

Kaidan puts his hand on her shoulder and squeezes, “I’m sorry, Commander.”

Hearing a noise behind them, Reza stands without hesitation and pulls her pistol at their intruder; a disheveled man who has the misfortune to disturb them in this moment. He shrieks in dismay putting his hands up in surrender. Seeing their intruder is a human, Reza puts away her pistol and gruffly orders, “Take care of this, Kaidan.” Turning away, Reza goes back to grieving for her fallen friend and tunes out the conversation that commences when Kaidan and Ashley follow orders and pulls the startled man aside so she can have a private moment to herself. 

Running her fingers over her friend’s face outlining his painted features to memory, Reza closes Nihlus’ unseeing eyes. With barely suppressed control over her emotions, Reza leans down and puts her forehead to his, remembering that it was a gesture that he used on her a few times before, in reverence. “I’m sorry, my friend,” she whispers and bows her head to grieve in silence as she sits back.

A few minutes later, Kaidan returns and kneels by her side. “Ma’am…it seems another Turian, by the name of Saren, was the one to kill Nihlus by shooting him in the back. According to that man, he seems to think that Nihlus knew him and trusted him enough to turn his back to him, letting down his guard.” 

Reza raises her head and with a furious glint in her eyes, she grates out in anger, “Did he know where this Saren went?”

Kaidan nods, “Yes. He took the tram to the spaceport, where the beacon was transferred to.”

Standing, Reza unhooks her assault rifle and looks at her squad, rage radiating out of her in waves and vengeance on her mind. “Saddle up. We have a Turian to kill.”

“Roger that,” both Kaidan and Ashley say together as they also ready their weapons. 

{{{}}}

After effectively and efficiently wiping out dozens more Geth waiting for them on the tram, they detect a surge of weapons grade radiation; indicating that bombs have been primed at their destination. 

“There are four bombs in four locations,” Kaidan points out as he briefs them from a diagram on his omni-tool of the spaceport. 

Reza quickly doles out orders, “Kaidan, take the bomb next to the tram platform. I’ll take bombs two and three on the balcony across from you and draw any fire to give you time to disarm it.” Pointing at the last bomb location, she adds, “We’ll meet at the fourth bomb’s location. Take that ramp, there, to go around,” she points the alternate route from hers that would take him directly to the fourth bomb site. “Ashley, you stay with the Lt and guard his flank while he takes care of the bombs.” Knowing Kaidan is about to argue with her for going off alone without back-up, she quickly shakes her head and after hearing two ‘aye-ayes,’ she rushes off the tram as soon as it slows down to stop on the platform. Taking fire from the few Geth waiting for them, she effectively eliminates them as she hurries over to the balcony she indicated earlier and her first target. 

{{{}}}

It only takes several minutes for the three of them to disarm the four bombs and take out the gaggle of Geth and husks who get in their way. 

After determining that the beacon they had come for was present and accounted for, Reza contacts the Normandy to report in and wait for further instructions. 

“Ground team to Normandy, this is Shepard.”

“Great to hear your voice, Commander,” Captain Anderson says over the comm from the bridge of the Normandy.

“We’ve eliminated all hostiles and the beacon is intact and sitting pretty for us to box it up and transfer to the Citadel.”

“Roger that, Commander, that is good to hear. Coordinate with Joker on a landing zone and I’ll contact the brass with the news.”

“Copy that, sir.”

Joker watches the Captain walk toward the comm room and switches to Reza’s private line, “Glad to know you’re okay, babe. It looked rough from up here, especially since we weren’t able to communicate with you directly like before in audio or visual.”

Reza smiles grimly and turns away from watching the colorful display on the beacon and her squad to talk privately. “I can imagine…trust me, it wasn’t a picnic from my end. Did you pick up Jenkins and Nihlus?”

“Yes, Commander, we just finished picking them up,” Joker replies, recognizing the strain in his wife’s voice. She’s just barely keeping it together. “Are you okay?”

“I will be as soon as the bastard who killed them is taken care of,” Reza replies, her voice hard. 

Knowing what has occurred based upon the witness accounts of how Nihlus was killed and the status reports that Reza had relayed to them during the mission, Joker agrees. “Roger that.”

Reza lowers her voice, “Although, speaking with you just now, helps a lot. I always feel better after I talk to you, babe. Thanks.”

“My pleasure…”

“Oh yeah? Maybe we can…” Reza pauses and then a garbled ‘HEY’ comes over the line and static erupts from their shared comm line loud enough that it makes Joker cringe and switch over to the squad line. What he hears next makes his heart freeze in fear. Opening a comm line to the Captain to request he return to the bridge ASAP, Joker quickly scrambles to find a safe landing zone at the spaceport to find out exactly what the fuck just happened to his wife.  
.  
.  
.  
{“NO! Don’t touch her!” 

“Commander!”

A large commotion and scuffling comes over the comm line…more static… “Careful with her head…Commander…please wake up…Reza…” Kaidan’s voice is husky with emotion, “Oh Gods no…please no…” 

“Is anyone out there…please…this is Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams. We need immediate evac…the Commander…she’s been…she needs help.” } 

{{{}}}

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hope you like my version of the Eden Prime mission. A lot of it is OC, but follows the same story line. I just mixed it up a little. Also, my new favorite word is 'ILK' - I have always wanted to use that in a story. It's weird the way my brain works...hehe. 
> 
> The next chapter is on its way...but it's a sad one. It's quite emotional and hard to write since it's the last we see of Nihlus. His character was a pleasure to write - we never got the chance to get to know him in the game. The only saving grace in this instant is that although Nihlus is irreplaceable, we can look forward to the entrance of Garrus, soon enough. Sigh...


	11. Wake Up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thanks for all the comments and kudos. It has been fun to write this story from the get go. If only I could write in order...lol. 
> 
> Life intervened since I last posted a chapter. Either way, I have a few chapters lined up and almost ready to go. Just need a little more meat & editing. Thanks for reading and enjoy! This chapter is rated, "M" for graphic scenes & language.

{{{}}}

It’s been hours since the fuck storm that was Eden Prime happened. Rezana is now ensconced in the med-bay; unconscious, in a coma of sorts, and hasn’t moved an inch. Jenkins’ body has been transferred to what is left of his family on Eden Prime and Nihlus’ remains are boxed away in a funereal casket, sitting ready in the cargo bay for when they dock at the Citadel. As far as the beacon exploding…well…the shit has hit the fan, so to speak, with the brass at Alliance HQ screaming for explanations. The Captain has been running around with his head cut off fielding calls from all sorts, including Reza’s father and mother. In the meantime, the crew was all grieving for the loss of Jenkins and in a small part, Nihlus too. What is left of Shepard’s ground team from Eden Prime has been in one meeting after another going over every detail with a fine toothed comb on what happened. Also, after a quick introduction, the new Gunnery Chief was integrated into the crew seamlessly. Her firsthand experience with the Geth and what happened prior to their initial arrival was extremely valuable. It helped lessen the noose around their necks, which gave them all a chance to focus on what was on everyone’s mind…whether their beloved XO would wake up. If she woke up… 

That was the crux really and what was really bothering Joker; would Rez wake up? After initially freaking out and wanting to be by her side which was impossible due to the constraints of doing his job and not being able to publicly acknowledge her as his wife; was driving him insane. Frustrated, anxious, and angry at the universe for what’s happened, all Joker can do is plot and replot the fastest course possible to the Citadel, even if it cuts only seconds off from their present course. It’s still going to take several days and as each hour, minute, second, goes by without knowing if…dammit WHEN, Reza wakes up…GAH, it’s killing him piece by piece. 

After a quick bull session between Rez’s father and the Captain which he was invited to attend and stood alone frowning down at the floor not listening to anything said between them, he was left to do as he pleased. Which is why, in the end, Joker ended up entrenched at his unconscious wife’s bedside, glaring at his ‘friend’ for also standing vigil over her, waiting. 

{{{}}}

‘What is it with this biotic butthead…hogging the space next to Reza’s bio-bed in the med-bay. What fucking stupid rule is there that he can’t tell this fucktard that he’s intruding and tell him to get lost?’ Eh? Shit. He’s losing it. Gripping onto Rez’s hand, he wishes that she’ll acknowledge him next to her for the 100th time and closes his eyes, quickly wiping the tear that escapes before anyone can see him do it from under his ever present ball cap. 'Come back to me, Rez,' he internally begs.  
.  
.  
.  
‘Really? This asshole is now making excuses that his head hurts and needs his own bio-bed next to where Rez is lying, for fuck’s sake? Oh WAH, my stupid head hurts…stupid fucktard. It’s his fucking fault his wife is in this position. If he hadn’t gotten so close to that fucking beacon…it wouldn’t have grabbed Rez instead, when she played hero and rescued his stupid ass.’  
.  
.  
.  
Glowering through his internal monologue of grievances towards his soon to be ex-friend, who in truth looks like death warmed over…Gah! He is not going to feel sorry for the turd. Nope! Not going to happen. A surge of forbidden empathy for the pain on the guy’s face makes him want to console him and he almost crutches over to him to do so. Wait…Damnit! Why does he have to make friends with this ass-munch who has obviously fallen for his wife and doesn’t even know it yet. Shit. Shit. Shit. He rolls his eyes heavenward. What. The. Hell! 

Actually, he knows exactly how Kaidan feels. There was just something amazing about Reza that made him want to worship the ground she walks on. Wait…What? Stop it, stupid. Who the hell is this nice person thinking nice thoughts about this idiot grimacing in pain in the next bio-bed? No! He can’t play nice even if the asshole saved his wife from death just a few days ago. 

Shaking his head in fervor, nope, there is absolutely no fucking way he was going to show sympathy for the moron who carried his unconscious wife onto the Normandy after her encounter with the beacon, like she was the most precious thing in the galaxy. 

Which she is. 

Damnit!

“Hey…uh…Kaidan? You okay, man?”

Idiot. Stop being nice!

Kaidan moans in response and turns over to face the other way and covers his head with his arms, mumbling incoherently. 

Shit. Now he feels awful for all of the things he was thinking…well, no, not really. Or, maybe not all of what he was thinking. Some of the things…yeah, some of the things he was thinking, were true. Kaidan moans again. Damnit! 

I’m sorry, my friend. 

Frowning, not understanding exactly what his friend is going through, Joker looks at Karin as she walks over next to Kaidan and checks his vitals. She then covers him with a blanket and lowers the lights in the med-bay. Quietly she looks over at him and motions him to join her at the door. He kisses his wife’s hand silently and lays it on top of her other hand and joins the Doc at the door. 

“Give him a few hours, Jeff. His reaction to being hit with whatever energy the beacon was emitting is minor compared to Rezana’s reaction. However, his L2 implant has been jostled and he’s dealing with a nasty migraine at the moment.”

“Can’t you do something for him? Like a shot or something?”

Karin shakes her head. “Unfortunately, no, not at this time. In the hubbub that’s been going on, he’s been hiding his migraine from me. Plus, he’s been worried sick about Rezana, blaming himself for what happened. It’s only because it’s gotten to this stage that he’s in the med bay now. It’s too late for any medications to help him through the worst of it, so he just has to ride it out and let it run its course. I’ll monitor him. There’s nothing either of us can do right now for him, or for the both of them. Speaking of which, you should go and get some rest. I’ll contact you the moment anything happens.”

“No. I’m not leaving her side. I can’t…”

“Jeff…you are going to worry yourself sick. Besides, now that Kaidan is here, I’m going to have to insist that you leave or at least until he is feeling better.”

“Please don’t make me leave, Karin.”

Karin brings him in for a quick hug. “I’m sorry, but I must insist. Rest…if you can. I’ll take good care of her. You know I will.”

Joker looks intently at the Doc for a minute. He knows that she considers Rez her daughter, having helped raised her while her mother was away. His shoulders sagging in defeat, Joker nods, “Fine,” and yawns. 

Chakwas gives him a slight smile and opens the med bay doors.

He leaves quietly, but knows that even though he’s exhausted, his body telling him in no uncertain terms that he needs to rest, he can’t. He ends up back in the bridge. Maybe work can dull his anxiety enough to stop worrying over things that are out of his control. Maybe…

{{{}}} 

The world is on fire. There are corpses strewn everywhere. Some are burnt to a crisp while others are still recognizable. Wait…all of the bodies are human. There are thousands…millions of corpses. She is standing in a field of yellow daisies and piles of human bodies are stacked unendingly around her for miles and miles. Oh Gods, where am I? What’s happened? What did this? Wait…what is that in the distance? It’s that same ship she remembers seeing hovering on Eden Prime. 

Only…there are hundreds of them, different shapes and sizes, all around her, and more in the sky above. What are they doing? They’re sifting through the human remains; harvesting them. For what, she cannot say, for she is a silent observer. A large ominous shadow drapes over her and she looks up to see another one of these foreboding ships settle over her. The size of this ship is enormous. Having nowhere to go, Reza backs up and stumbles over a body lying behind her; a familiar baseball cap being the only thing recognizable on the corpse. No! Grief overwhelms her as she soon sees that this is not the only corpse she recognizes piled around her. The scene suddenly changes…the sky turns red, orange, purple, yellow, green, and colors she can’t describe. Each flash of color accompanies the same field of corpses, only with different species strewn about; Asari, Salarian, Quarian, Krogan, Turian, Volus, Hanar, and other species she doesn’t recognize. The flashes of color increase and eventually she can’t take it and covers her tear soaked face with her hands; there are too many images, too many faces of carnage and ruin. 

Then all the air is sucked out and she loses her balance and drops to her knees as the stench of death overwhelms her. The destruction of countless races going back eons flows over her. Gasping, her brain is overloaded with images from the past and future all jumbled together. Then, when she feels as though she can’t take much more of the slaughter, the monstrous ‘Reaper’ above her, in the field of daisies, engulfs her in red fire. Feeling her skin peel away, her body burning from the inside out, she screams in agony. Not just because of the pain but over the loss of countless millions of lives; until her body disintegrates and she is nothing but ash in the wind. 

{{{}}} 

“Doctor Chakwas, I think she’s waking up.”

Reza hears rustling as someone shifts on one of the adjacent beds and then a muffled female voice asks her, “Cmmrander, mmru ok?”

She opens her eyes and instantly regrets it and covers her face with her hands and turns to the side to contort her body into a fetal position. She grimaces and mumbles, “Huh?”

Karin brushes the hair on her head that has escaped her bun and asks in a soothing voice, “Rezana…are you okay?”

“Not really.”

“You had us worried there for a while. How’re you feeling?”

Reza tries to sit up and only manages to make the lights in the med bay start to swirl and dance around her. Deciding that maybe lying down is better for her, unless she wants to end up heaving, she returns to her fetal position. “Ugh. I feel like the morning after shore leave.”

Karin chuckles, “So; headache, nausea, light sensitivity, those sort of symptoms?”

“Ugh, yes.”

“Okay, that’s a start. I have something that will take care of that right away,” and she moves off to apparently grab whatever she thinks will help her feel better. 

“What happened?” She asks no one in particular. 

Another rustling sound reaches her ears and a weak male voice responds to her inquiry. “It’s my fault, Commander. I must have triggered some kind of security field when I approached the beacon. You had to push me out of the way.” 

Recognizing the voice, Reza grunts in acknowledgement and winces when Karin finds what she is looking for and gives her a shot in the arm. Waiting a few moments to get her bearings, she opens her eyes and sees that Kaidan is lying on the adjacent bed looking unwell. “You had no way of knowing what the beacon was going to do.” Thinking back, she doesn’t remember how Kaidan had gotten in the way of the beacon, but only that he was taken against his will. Without even thinking about it, she had instantly reacted and as Kaidan put it, push him out of the way. She was apparently taken instead and can’t remember anything else other than waking up a few minutes ago. Looking at Kaidan, she notices that he’s pale and is in obvious pain. “If I pulled you out of harm’s way, what are you doing here? Are you okay?”

Kaidan had smiled slightly at her response to his declaration and then grimaced. “Whatever the beacon did to grab me before you pulled me away, triggered a migraine. I’m better though, Commander, no need to worry about me. I’m just glad that you’re awake.”

“Why? How long have I been out of it?”

Karin smiles, “About 15 hours. We were starting to worry that you would’nt wake up. There wasn’t much we could do, not knowing exactly what happened.”

That got her attention, “What do we know?”

Kaidan explains, “The beacon exploded. A system overload, maybe. The blast knocked you out cold. I had to carry you back here to the ship.”

Crap! Joker has got to be worried. With him in mind, she decides that it’s time to see if the medicine has taken effect and sits up. She rotates her legs to hang over the bed and leans her elbows on her knees so she can get her balance again and to check herself over; now noticing something off about her equilibrium. 

“Why is my implant turned off?”

Kaidan speaks up before the doctor, “Whatever the beacon did to you, burned out your amp, Commander. Before the Normandy could land, I had to do an emergency implant dump.”

Reza looks up at him suddenly, understanding immediately what he had to do after she was thrown from the grip of the beacon. An implant dump is a last ditch effort before the patient’s brain is scrambled when the worst case scenario happens and an amp needs to be removed forcibly. Hopefully, in these instances, you have a doctor on hand or a field medic worth their salt. Fortunately for her, she has both. After the few missions that she and the Lt have gone on together, she knows Kaidan is a dedicated and knowledgeable medic. Thank the gods that he was there and knew what to do. She smiles at him, “Thank you, Lt. Without your quick thinking, I would be brain dead or worse.” Suddenly realizing the enormity of the situation she was in on Eden Prime, she exclaims, “Holy Shitballs!”

Kaidan reddens at her reaction and looks away embarrassed, but he smiles at her complement. It was extremely hectic for those few minutes before the Normandy landed. That is not a moment he wants to relive, ever. They almost lost her. 

The doctor looks between the two of them, “Yes, well, ‘holy shitballs’ aside, the Lt did exactly what he was supposed to do. Once we got you back on the ship, there wasn’t much I could do other than to make you comfortable. You had abnormal beta waves and…I also noticed and increase in your rapid eye movement, signs typically associated with intense dreaming.”

Yes. The vision. She remembers it now. “Dreaming…ha, more like a nightmare. I saw…I don’t know what I saw. Death. Destruction. It was intense, but unclear…a warning perhaps…I don’t know. It’s all jumbled together and hard to interpret.”

“Hmm…I’ll have to add that to my report.” Karin adds after looking worriedly at her. 

Reza huffs, “Oh good, so the Alliance can think I’ve gone off the reservation, once again? Please, Karin, let me stew on it awhile, before you report it.”

“Let me talk with the Captain, at least. I’m sure he would understand,” Karin gives her a slight upturn of her lips and nods. 

Reza nods in acknowledgement. Karin has to do her job. Maybe telling David about the dream won’t get her institutionalized for letting the beacon get destroyed. Realizing she is still holding Kaidan’s hand after jumping down and grabbing it while Karin was speaking, she gives it another squeeze and releases him. “Well, either way, I owe you my life, Kaidan. Again.”

Feeling a little bereft from the loss of her hand, Kaidan puts a hand out to stop her from walking away from him and looks at her seriously, “Why did you save me, Commander? I got too close to the beacon. It was my fault it grabbed me.”

Reza pauses and bites her lip, the grief of losing Nihlus and Jenkins taking a hold of her, once again. Looking down at him, Reza unthinkingly reaches out her hand and smooths a lock of his hair off his brow and smiles at him. “I couldn’t lose you too, Kaidan. I’ve lost too many friends. I had the chance and took it. I’d much rather put myself in danger than anyone else. Besides, I think it would have grabbed anyone who approached it. You can’t blame yourself for this. What’s done is done…can’t change it now.”

Karin has been listening to their conversation off to the side, seeing the Lieutenant blush when Reza touches him. Shaking her head, it seems Reza still has no idea about personal boundaries and what she should and should not do with her subordinates; even if they have become friends. She just can’t seem to understand that she shouldn’t be as nice as she is with everyone, especially impressionable young men who find her attractive. The Captain is right; she will have to explain soon to the young Lieutenant about her marital status, because he’s definitely fallen for her. Deciding to intervene to distract the Lieutenant from doing something that he will regret later, she joins the conversation. “Before you say anything, Lt, the Commander was right to save you. The beacon would have killed you. You weren’t strong enough to withstand its message. Your L2 implant would have overloaded and you would be a vegetable. Yes, the Commander came close to that outcome, but her biotic power is stronger. It’s the strongest on record. Also, without your quick reflexes to remove her damaged implant, you would have died since no one had your medical training.”

Kaidan gasps, not knowing the extent of how potent the beacon’s energy was on Reza’s system. Looking at his XO in question as she looks down at him also a little shaken at the revelation of such information, he grazes her cheek with his other hand, his eyes following the gesture. “Then…I thank you for saving my life.”

Blinking back at him, Reza grabs his hand and squeezes it before moving away a few feet, suddenly uncomfortable, “Then I guess we are even, Lieutenant.”

“And unfortunately, as soldiers, you will probably rack up more saves and close calls and it is my job to patch you up for the next time.” Doc Chakwas exclaims just as Captain Anderson walks through the med bay doors and motions for Reza to follow him.

Smiling at Karin and then nodding at Kaidan in farewell, Reza states, “The life of a marine, Ma’am.”

{{{}}}

After scheduling the procedure to re-implant another L3n amp, Reza follows the Captain to his private conference room. 

As soon as the door closes to his private quarters, David takes his goddaughter into his arms and hugs her, relieved to see that she seems fine from her ordeal with the beacon. “Don’t ever do that to me again, Rezana. I nearly lost you.”

Muffled, Reza sighs, “You know I can’t promise you that.”

“I know, kid. It’s just…as your godfather I have to say it.” David sighs in resignation at the life that his precious goddaughter has chosen. 

Pulling away, Reza sits down at the table and rests her head on her fists, grinning up at him. “Thanks, David, but I’m fine. Well…mostly fine.”

Taking his cue from her, David sits across from her and leans back into his seat. He may as well get comfortable for this conversation. “Speaking of which…although I’m glad to have you back, this whole fiasco is a shitstorm, Commander,” reverting to their professional personas.

Straightening, Reza latches on to his pained expression. “Shitstorm…I did nothing wrong. Intelligence dropped the ball, sir. We didn’t know what we were dropping into on Eden Prime.” A sudden thought occurred to her and she hissed in a quick breath, “Please tell me that Kaidan isn’t in trouble, either. That beacon would have latched onto anyone within the vicinity. It wasn’t his fault. It must have been activated by Saren, before he left planet-side.”

“Yes, your father and I came to that conclusion, as well. So, whatever happened to you, probably happened to Saren. We can only hope that he’s as confused as you. What can you remember about your vision? Anything you can recollect could be helpful.”

“It has all jumbled together since awakening. But, what I can remember was a warning…something awful is coming. Machines…possibly the Geth…death…destruction…I don’t know. I’m getting the overall feeling that we don’t have a lot of time before this ominous presence rains destruction over the whole galaxy.”

David has leaned forward during her description of her vision, a frown gathering on his face. “We need to inform the council. They need to hear this.”

Reza rears back in her seat. “Why? So I had a dream…big whoop! Who in their right mind would believe in my warning that destruction is coming. We need to act on what we do know. We know that Saren is a murderer. He shot Nihlus in the back and killed thousands of civilians on Eden Prime. We need to take him down.”

“I agree. You know about my history with Saren. I knew he was an evil bastard, but I never thought that he would stoop this low. Allying with the Geth! I’ve been contacted by the Human Ambassador. We have a standing meeting with him as soon as we dock with the Citadel, tomorrow afternoon. 

Groaning in annoyance, Reza exclaims sarcastically, “Great. Just the person I want to see.”

David chuckles and shakes his head. “I know he’s not your favorite person, but he will be able to get us in to see the Council as soon as possible. He has his ear to the ground on what needs to be done to take Saren down. He’s a highly respected Spectre, Reza. We’re going to have to do things by the book to catch the bastard.”

Reza stands up and salutes him, “Roger that, sir.”

David stands and salutes his XO. 

Relaxing her stance Reza quietly asks him, the pain in her chest almost driving her to her knees with the grief of losing her friends. “What about Nihlus and Jenkins, sir? Did we pick up their remains?” 

David looks at his goddaughter and sees the pain she’s trying to hide and comes around the table to engulf her in anther hug, knowing that she needs the encouragement to help her stay in control for the time being. Pulling away, David wipes the tears that have escaped and slid down her cheeks. “We were able to contact Jenkins’ family on Eden Prime before we left orbit. He will be buried in his family plot. Nihlus, however, his body has been preserved in a funereal casket and awaiting for pick up in the cargo bay. Counselor Sparatus has informed us that his family will take custody once we arrive at the Citadel. If you want to make your goodbyes before we get there, now would be the time.”

“Yes, I would like that. I’m sure his family will not allow a ‘human’ to attend his memorial service.” 

David nods. “I can clear the cargo bay for you, should you wish it. But first, I would recommend that you visit with your husband. He’s been beside himself since Lieutenant Alenko returned you to the Normandy, unconscious. Other than briefly visiting you in the med bay, he hasn’t left his post since early this morning. Please, make him rest, Reza. I need him at his best when we arrive at the Citadel tomorrow.”

“Didn’t you order him to leave?”

David shakes his head, “I couldn’t. I knew he needed to work to keep from worrying about you too much.”

“Ok. Regarding the cargo bay, I’ll let you know when I plan to visit. I want to have a vigil, sing a couple of songs, if that’s okay. Nihlus liked it when I sang.”

“Everyone likes it when you sing, my dear. You have a voice like an angel. Should others like to go to your vigil…would that be okay?”

Reza nods, “Sure.”

{{{}}}

Fighting exhaustion, Joker can barely keep his eyes from blurring on his controls, when he hears Pressly exclaim loudly, “Glad to see you’re okay, Commander. We were all worried about you, Ma’am.”

“I’m fine, Lieutenant. But, thank you,” his wife says as she passes the Lt and walks up the gangway towards the bridge, pausing every few feet to acknowledge the crews’ greetings. 

Joker turns on auto-pilot and stands up to hobble over to the side of the cockpit to lean against the co-pilots chair, away from prying eyes, to await her arrival. Just as he makes himself comfortable, Reza walks into the cabin and stops, looking at him. 

Confused as to why he’s not looking at her, Reza hesitantly approaches him, “Jeff…you okay?”

Huffing in disbelief, he says, “Am I okay? I just spent the last 15 hours since Eden Prime wondering if my wife would awaken…or not.” Letting his worry for her finally show on his face, he adds, “I am NOT okay. I was worried and scared, my love. Why? Why did you have to be the hero, again?”

Reza rushes towards him and they embrace. Cupping his face in her hands, Reza kisses him gently, putting all the love she has for him in the act. Pulling away, slightly breathless, she whispers, “I’m so sorry. It was the only thing I could think of doing. I’d already lost Jenkins and Nihlus. I couldn’t lose another squad member. Two were enough for one day.” Seeing him wince and frown as if he was struggling with something, Reza guesses and adds, “It wasn’t Kaidan’s fault. Don’t blame him.”

“I wasn’t blaming him.”

Reza examines his face, looking skeptical. Raising an eyebrow, she looks pointedly at him, “Are you sure?” When he looks down, frowning at the floor, she informs him, “It had to be me, babe. Karin confirmed just now that if I hadn’t intervened, Kaidan would be a vegetable. That is worse than being dead. He wouldn’t have withstood the energy that the beacon gave off. He wasn’t strong enough. His L2 implant would have literally fried his brain.”

Joker looks up at her, shocked. “And you were stronger…apparently.”

Reza nods, “I guess so.”

Joker huffs again and outlines her face with his eyes as he gently brushes his hand over her cheek. Taking in the deep shadows under her eyes and the sheer exhaustion she is trying hard not to give in to, he gives her a once over and gives her a cocky look. “I guess being a badass biotic extraordinaire, isn’t at all bad, then.”

Reza snorts a laugh at his attempt to be funny, “I thought you liked being married to a badass biotic. I’ve heard the sex is amazing.”

Joker smiles and leans in to kiss her again, “That’s an understatement.” Pulling back again he leans his forehead against hers, “I’m sorry about Jenkins…and Nihlus. Are you going to be alright? How are you feeling?”

Running her fingers through his beard, feeling how soft it is, Reza sighs. “Better now. I always feel better…here in your arms.”

“Kiss ass…”

Reza laughs and kisses him once more before stepping back to lean against the bulkhead next to him, giving him a break from her weight. Straightening, she winces and rubs her lower back as it suddenly spasms. “To be honest…not well…I have a nasty headache and I feel like I’ve gone ten rounds with a Krogan. My whole body is aching and sore.”

Joker reaches out and tries to soothe her by rubbing his hand over her lower back to relieve the tense muscles. “I can see that. You need to rest, babe.” Yawning, Joker sheepishly smiles at her, “Me too. Want to meet me in our quarters? I need to call the relief pilot.”

Reza nods and then quickly shakes her head. “Go ahead. Before taking you up on your offer, I want to go to the cargo bay and pay my respects to Nihlus. I don’t want to miss the opportunity to do so, since I doubt his family will allow me to come to his memorial service. Turians don’t like outsiders in their funereal rituals.” Reza adds as she gathers Joker’s crutches from under his pilot chair and hands them to him.

“Want me to join you?” Joker asks after sending a request for his replacement through his omni-tool. 

“Sure.”

{{{}}}

Leaning her head back on her husband’s shoulder as they ride down in the lift to the cargo bay, Reza feels like the past two days have flown by. Her life has been turned upside down and she feels almost inside out. Ugh. Though right at this moment, having her husband’s arms around her always makes her feel better. He makes her feel safe. And, feeling safe right now is heaven. Ever since waking up from whatever mind-fuck the beacon had done to her, her mind has been bombarded with flashes of death, destruction, pain, and fear. Basically, she feels strung out and tense as all hell; kind of like she felt after learning about the aftereffects of the Thresher Maw acid that had eaten through her armor and into her skin after her first run in with one on Akuze. Running her hand down over the area where the injury used to be across her lower torso, she sighs, remembering. 

“Are you alright, babe?” Joker asks as he leans his head on her shoulder as he holds her from behind. She has a tendency to rub on the spot of her old injury whenever she is feeling stressed out. Her skin may be unblemished due to Karin’s deft hands at applying a synthetic overlay, but it was the internal scarring that his wife was apparently thinking about. 

Turning around, Reza nuzzles against his neck, breathing in his scent. “Not really, no. I just need time to sort through everything. I was just thinking about…well you know.” 

Yes, he knew what she was thinking about. The internal scarring was caused by the Thresher’s acid as it burned away her ability to carry a child. Even the modern medicine of the time couldn’t repair the damage done to her uterus. Thresher Maw acid was just that potent. Leaning down, Joker captures her mouth with his and kisses her gently. “I love you.”

Moaning against him, Reza pulls away enough to smile up at him. “I love you, too.” Then steeling herself, she straightens and extricates herself from him and gives him a quick kiss before adding a few feet between them as the lift stops and opens its doors. It was time to say goodbye to her friend and partner. 

{{{}}}

Walking toward the gleaming silver casket sitting in the middle of the cargo bay, Reza starts to tear up. The onslaught of emotion from the beacon’s message and the death of her friend almost break her. Stopping just short of the casket, Reza pauses and catches her breath. 

Not following his wife out to the casket, knowing she needs some alone time, Joker stops and leans his crutches against the boxes of supplies leaning against the corner next to the requisition console, currently empty. Leaning his crutches next to him he sits on one of the boxes to silently support his wife from afar. He doesn’t have to be right by her side, she knows he’s there. That’s enough for now. While they had waited for his relief pilot, he had signaled the Captain and anyone else wanting to join the vigil, to meet them in the bay. He is soon joined by the Captain, Doctor Chakwas, Lieutenant Alenko, Chief LaFlamme and the entire marine detail, others from the engineering staff, navigation team, and various others. Off in the corner near the armory, the new marine, Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams, stood alone. 

Looking around at his fellow crew mates, Joker sees that they are all grieving in their own way; some for Corporal Jenkins, others to support their XO in her grief over her partner and friend, and as in the case of Ashley, she was mourning the loss of her whole squad. Since they had returned Jenkins’ body to his family on Eden Prime; Nihlus’ casket represented those that they lost. Nihlus may have only worked with Reza and the Captain since boarding the Normandy, but Corporal Jenkins was known by the whole crew and would be greatly missed. His bubbly personality was infectious, making him well liked and popular. 

After reading through the Eden Prime reports; Joker knew that their new recruit was going to need someone to relate to after losing her entire squad. Joker may himself seem standoffish and anti-social…okay, that’s exactly how he is, but he also knew that Ashley will benefit from serving under Reza. After losing her whole squad in a similar circumstance…Akuze…his wife can relate and will help Ashley come to terms with her survivor’s guilt. 

Either way, as the crew gathered around them; they all waited with bated breath for their XO and as one gasp when she kneels next to the casket and runs her hand along the top of it as she bows her head in grief, muffled noise of crying filtering out to them. 

Wanting desperately to go to her, Joker looks away and clenches his jaw in frustration. As Reza’s husband, he should be right there with her as she deals with her grief, not alone. Damnit! Suddenly, a hand gently grips his, making him look up to see that Karin has joined him. She knows how he feels. He nods his thanks when she looks at him sadly. They both recognize that Reza should not have to bare this burden on her own. 

Seeming to have the same frame of mind, Captain Anderson walks over and stands next to his goddaughter. Since everyone was now aware of their affiliation, he can stand vigil with her; and offer support, should she need it. 

Not knowing for sure whether Reza wanted to remember this moment or if something untoward with the Council happens regarding the death of one of their senior Spectres, Joker had asked the Normandy’s VI to record their vigil for Nihlus. Precaution never hurt anyone. Besides, if anything, maybe the vid could provide closure for those who couldn’t attend in person. 

{{{}}}

Reza raises her head when a shadow falls over her and turns slightly to see that David has joined her. Wiping her cheeks to remove the tears, she slowly stands and joins him taking his hand in hers. Still shaking with her remorse, she takes a large breath and starts to sing; with a hauntingly beautiful voice. 

~ See You Again, by Samy Jebari

It’s been a long day without you, my friend  
And I’ll tell you all about it when I see you again  
We’ve come a long way, from where we began  
Oh, I’ll tell you all about it when I see you again  
When I see you again

Why do you have to listen slowly?  
Why do you have to go?  
Why do you have to leave me when I need you the most?  
Cause I really don’t know how to tell ya  
I’m feeling much worse  
I know you went to a better place  
But it was always going to hurt

Carry on…give me all the strength I need to carry on…ooh

It’s been a long day, without you my friend  
And I’ll tell you all about it when I see you again  
We’ve come a long way, from where we began  
Oh, I’ll tell you all about it when I see you again  
When I see you again

Her voice cracks and she stops singing as another wave of grief envelopes her. She bows her head and starts silently sobbing, her arms wrapping around herself. David also wraps an arm around her, his heart aching as he watches the pain radiate out of her. Before he can pull her into his arms, Reza breaks away and steps forward to kneel once again at the head of the casket and lays her hand upon it. Then she disconnects her translator mode on her omni-tool and begins a chant; filling the cargo bay. 

Recognizing it as one of the songs Reza sings to say goodbye, David straightens and bows his head in reverence. 

~ Dauðalogn, Sigur Rós (See note for English version of song) 

Heimur hljóðlátur  
Hreyfist ei hár höfði  
Hljómar grafarþögn  
Enginn vaknaður  
Enginn taktur hraður  
Algert dauðalogn

Inn á við held ég  
Viðarglætur birta bál  
Einn með mér sjálfum  
Anda inn anda frá

Viðáttan er greið  
Ferðamönnum og mér  
Fyllir fjallasal  
Klettar bergmála  
Bergmálar í höfðum  
Úti dauðalogn

Inn á við held ég  
Viðarglætur birta bál  
Einn með sjálfum mér  
Nú sit ég með fast land undir fót  
Morguninn mættur  
Með sitt logn á mót storm  
Og nú gárast yfirborðin  
Og nú brjótum við dauðalognið

As Reza finishes her song with another chant, her voice eerily filling the cargo bay with her song, those of the crew that have amassed in the cargo bay are totally transfixed due to her angelic voice. As Reza finishes the song and bows her head, a deep sense of calm and peace rings out, putting everyone in a trance.  
.  
.  
.  
Not wanting to break this perfect moment, Kaidan waits until the Captain hugs his goddaughter and dismisses the people gathered in the cargo bay. After Reza, Joker, and Doctor Chakwas leave via the elevator, Kaidan asks the Captain, curious, “What language was that last song?”

Seeing that the Lieutenant has been deeply affected by Reza’s singing, David explains, “It’s Icelandic. It’s a song of goodbye.”

“How does the Commander even know of this song?” Then as though it’s an afterthought, Kaidan adds, “Her voice is so beautiful.”

“I’ll let her tell you…just suffice it to know that she’s learned a lot of mourning songs in her life, thus far. Lots of friends to grieve for…as you can imagine…Akuze.” Watching the emotions cross over the Lieutenant’s face, David adds, “She did the right thing, Lieutenant, by jumping in to save you. As a leader, you always sacrifice yourself for your crew. Go down with the ship, so to speak.” 

“I understand, sir.” 

“Do you?”

Kaidan blinks and looks at his CO, recognizing that he is being asked seriously if he understands exactly what it takes to be a leader in the Alliance. Nodding, Kaidan honestly responds to his CO’s query, “I’m learning…”

“Good. You have a lot of potential, Lieutenant. I knew that when I picked you to join my crew, here, on the Normandy. The Commander will help you achieve that potential. Listen to her. Challenge her if you must, but more than anything let her teach you what it is to lead troops. If you listen hard enough, you’ll become a great leader in time. We could all learn a lesson from Reza. She’s had to endure a lot in her short life. She’s an amazing young woman.”

“Yes sir. Yes, she is.”

{{{}}}

It doesn’t take long once Joker’s head hits the pillow for him to fall asleep, but no matter what, Reza can’t follow him into the void. Although being out for 15 hours, due to the beacon fiasco, Reza is mentally and physically exhausted. Only, she can’t sleep. 

The vision that she was forced to witness, disturbs her…scares her. Something is coming. Something that will destroy all that she knows and loves. The thought that truly keeps her awake is the fact that no one knows what’s coming. How do you prepare for its arrival? More importantly, how do you fight back? 

How? 

{{{}}}

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hope you enjoyed this new installment in the Femshep/Joker storyline. I was sorry to see Nihlus go in the last chapter, so I will insert another scene in a chapter ahead that introduces his family. Not every Turian hates humans...just saying. 
> 
> As promised, here is the English version translation to Dauðalogn, from Sigur Rós. Please listen to the original version of the song. It's beautiful and makes me get teary-eyed everytime I listen to it. I have loved ones who are no longer here to...
> 
> [A quiet home, not a hair on the head stirs  
> Sounds grave-still  
> No one wakes up  
> No rhythm speeds up  
> Absolute dead calm
> 
> Inside I think, forest lights reveal a fire  
> One with myself  
> Breathe in, breathe out
> 
> The wide expanse is passable, for travelers and me  
> A mountain hall fills, rocks cliff-paint  
> Cliff-paints in the head  
> Dead calm outside
> 
> Inside I think, forest lights reveal a fire  
> One with myself  
> Now I sit with steady land underfoot  
> The morning appears with its calm against the storm  
> And now the surface ripples  
> And now we break the dead calm]


	12. Grief

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thanks for all the kudos and comments. This chapter is rated ‘E’ for sexual situations and language. 
> 
> It’s also an interactive experience. Listen to the following songs in order and the next scene will make more sense. It’s not exact, depending upon your reading speed, but I’ll prompt you when to move onto the next song. You can either wait to read on to the next part of the story until the current song is finished or skip ahead. Your choice. Hopefully you have access to a music source that has these songs available. I’ve never written this way, but it seemed appropriate for Reza’s workout. Enjoy!
> 
> Three Days Grace, (Break)  
> Five Finger Death Punch, (Bad Company)  
> Johnny Cash, (Hurt)  
> Disturbed, (Down with the Sickness)  
> Rage Against the Machine, (Killing in the Name)  
> Disturbed, (The Vengeful One)  
> Sia, (Unstoppable)  
> Meg Myers, (Desire)

{{{}}}

After having another erotic dream about his XO, Kaidan jerks awake; sweating and shaking as he lays his head back onto his pillow and stares up at the bunk above him as he tries to calm his rapid heartbeat. Dissipating his biotic energy that had arisen from the mental images still lingering within his thoughts; he brings up his hands to rub his face. Crap. That makes it what…third night in a row of having sex dreams of his XO? Adjusting himself within his sweats, he grunts recognizing that he’s made a mess of another set of his boxer briefs. Grimacing, he feels like an idiot. He’s a grown man, in his thirties for fuck sake. Granted, it has been awhile since he dated anyone, but it’s not as if he doesn’t take care of his needs on his own like all the other guys on long cruises, since fraternization is not allowed. The difference between him and the other single crewmembers is that when on shore leave, he still doesn’t partake; well, not one night stands anyway. He’s had several long distant relationships throughout the years, not that they work, but that’s just the way he is. He’s not in it to get his rocks off for a few nights. Maybe it was his upbringing, but he wants commitment. It makes it mean more. Call him old fashioned, but that’s how he rolls. But, there is just something about his XO that brings out his libido like he’s a teenager again. His first thought when he met her was that she dripped sex…well, that was accurate. He can’t seem to stop himself from thinking all sorts of sordid things about Reza, mostly derogatory…FUCK! She deserves a lot more respect than that. 

Once he comes to the conclusion that he can’t fall back asleep, he gets up to change out of his underwear and decides to go commando in his sweats, just long enough to get to the men’s room. However, just as he is about to strip and take a shower to take care of his problem, he decides that there is a better solution. This ship is equipped with one of the best stocked gyms he’s ever seen. Thinking it was time to start a new workout regimen, Kaidan walks back to the officer’s quarters and changes into his workout clothes and grabs his duffle with his gear to go work off his frustrations. 

{{{}}} 

Before entering the gym, Kaidan notices that it’s currently occupied by someone who has the same idea as him; to work out their stress. Although by the sound of the music playing, eerily filtering out through the see-through sliding door, this person wasn’t sexually frustrated, but angry. Not recognizing the song playing, Kaidan programs his omni-tool to scan and raising his eyebrows at the results, he listens to the lyrics…

...[‘We’re gonna light it up. Tonight we start the fire. Tonight we break away. Break. Away from everybody. Break. Away from everything…’] (Three Days Grace: Break)

Interesting song choice, he thinks to himself. Just as he’s about to join whomever is inside, he catches a black ponytail bobbing in the corner as the person runs full tilt on the treadmill. Hesitating, his eyes inadvertently slide from the long tail of silky hair down the sweat soaked lithe physique with pert breasts covered in a sports-bra that doesn’t mask the bounce of the perfectly palm friendly globes. He groans when he sees that through the physical exertion, her nipples are straining against the fabric. Licking his lips, he imagines what he would do with the delectable nubbins peeking out at him. Almost drooling over the scene in front of him, his eyes glide further down her body to see that she’s wearing those same workout shorts from the other night when he ran in to her in the mess; still barely covering her ass. Groaning, his mind goes completely blank as his blood shoots south and he suddenly feels as though he is going to combust. After having his explicit sex dream about her and seeing her like this, Kaidan leans against the wall next to the door and closes his eyes to try to get back control over his faculties. Thankfully, his new position is just out of eyesight from her and as the hallway leading up to the gym is dark compared to the lighted interior; he’s hoping she didn’t notice him. This is a good thing since now his cock has hardened once again into a rock and it’s making him uncomfortable just standing there and watching. Fuck! He should have taken the shower first like he wanted to, just to relieve some of his sexual tension. 

Shaking his head, he realizes that since meeting his XO, he has been masturbating quite a bit more than he ever had before. It was always difficult to take care of things on a crowded ship; not having much privacy, but everyone tended to do so in some way or another. For him, he was always able to abate any wanton thoughts by working out or by training his biotics; the exertion of doing so always took all his energy and he ended up tiring himself out. But not since joining the crew of the Normandy or at least not since meeting Rezana Shepard. Nope. His shower stall had become a sanctuary and it has given him a place to express himself a lot more, lately. He’s probably not the only one. Reza was a desirable woman and to just be around her, excited him in more ways than one. Trying to dampen his desire for the woman inside the gym, currently working out her anger, he tries to think of something else before he embarrasses himself, which he knows he will do as soon as he joins her for a workout.

Looking away from his temptation, he perks up when the music changes. Checking his omni-tool to see which song Reza picked, he notices that she has decreased her running speed and is now walking to catch her breath. Watching her turn off the machine and walk over to the lockers to grab a towel and drink from her bottle of water, he still hesitates to join her, not wanting to intrude. Plus, his hard on is not as yet gone, allowing him to listen…

...[‘A company always on the run. A destiny, oh it’s the rising sun. I was born, a shotgun in my hands. Behind the gun, I’ll make my final stand. Yeah. And that’s why they call me. Bad company. I can’t deny. Bad company. Till the day I die. Until the day I die… Eye for an eye. Tooth for a tooth. Blood for blood. We’ve all gotta die...’] (Five Finger Death Punch: Bad Company)

Yikes, it’s obvious based on the song that Reza has picked that she is working out her anger for whoever this Saren guy is, for killing her friend, Nihlus. Seeing Reza move into the middle of the gym, he straightens thinking that she has seen him but starts choking and almost hyperventilating when she turns around and bends over in front of him, starting to stretch. Jerking his suddenly very wide eyes away from the image of her ass jiggling in front of him as she stretches out her quads, Kaidan looks down and focuses his thoughts on trying to keep his libido from taking over again, since his cock had started to wane. Fuck!  
.  
.  
.  
Hearing a distinctive sound of someone else coming down the hallway to the gym, Kaidan turns towards the sound and sure enough Joker rounds the corner shuffling under his crutches. Crap! Perfect timing. Suddenly glad that he brought his gear-bag, he shifts it in front of his crotch so as not to give away that he is turned on from accidentally snooping on their XO as she works off her stress. Grimacing, Kaidan waits to see what fresh hell Joker will rain down upon him for his position outside the door; clearly hiding. That by itself is suspicious as fuck. Plastering a fake smile on his face, he awaits his fate. 

{{{}}}

Worried after waking up alone, having dozed off before Reza joined him in their shared cabin since she had the Doc implant another L3n amp; Joker couldn’t fall asleep again until he knew Reza was okay. They hadn’t done much talking; after Reza returned. All he remembers is holding her; needing to feel their connection for each other more than anything, and it was enough to make them both fall asleep. Not finding his wife in their room or in the mess hall, Joker worried that Reza was unwell after her ordeal with the beacon; had asked ‘Betty Bitchbox’ where the XO was, and sighed in relief when he found out that Reza was currently in the gym. 

Knowing that Reza had some anxiety built up over the events that happened on Eden Prime, he decided to join her. However, he hadn’t counted on Reza already having an audience. Seeing Kaidan hiding in the hallway just outside the door to the gym, made him frown in suspicion; especially once he catches him blushing. Joining him outside the door, Joker looks inside to see what’s going on. ‘Ah! Now he gets it.’ Reza is stretching in front of the door, completely oblivious, as usual, to any outside stimuli. A surge of jealousy rears its ugly head and before he can tamp down the biting remark, he snarls, “Enjoying the view, Alenko?”

“Uh…no comment,” Kaidan stammers as his cheeks get redder as he looks down at the floor again.

Before Joker can make another nasty remark, the music changes again making them both jerk and look at Reza as she sits on the mat, bowing her head. 

...[‘I hurt myself today. To see if I still feel. I focus on the pain. The only thing that’s real. The needle tears a hole. The old familiar sting. Try to kill it all away. But I remember everything. What have I become. My sweetest friend. Everyone I know, goes away in the end. And you could have it all. My empire of dirt. I will let you down. I will make you hurt…’] (Johnny Cash: Hurt)

Ah Shit…Reza must be hurting more than she let on, for losing Nihlus, Joker thinks to himself. When Reza listened to Johnny Cash, she was usually inconsolable. The only thing to do for her was to let her work it out on her own. Joker sighs… 

As soon as the song ends, the two of them quietly observe Reza as she gets up and walks back over to the lockers to wrap her hands, getting ready to use the heavy bag currently leaning against the wall. Concentrating, she biotically lifts the bag so she can clip it into the hook hanging from the ceiling and starts a couple of test hits until the music changes once again. 

Cringing, Joker hopes that the next song is something other than another Johnny Cash song. If it is, then she will be okay and be able to get past whatever funk she is feeling at the moment. Seeing that Kaidan is about to open the door, he puts his hand on the man’s shoulder making him pause. When he looks at him, Joker shakes his head and puts a finger to his lips, gesturing to him to wait and keep quiet. Kaidan doesn’t know this, but Reza plays music according to her moods and he has figured out when to intervene and when not to. If Reza picks more Johnny Cash songs, then he’ll intervene and kick Kaidan to the curb…fuck the consequences. 

Sighing in relief, Joker recognizes one of his wife’s favorite songs; Down with the Sickness, from Disturbed. She starts beating the shit out of the heavy bag in time with the beat from the song. Kaidan lets out a low whistle when he watches her execute a perfect roundhouse kick with enough force to make the heavy bag swing erratically. Joker grimaces when he sees that Kaidan is in awe of how Reza treats the heavy bag as an opponent and systematically runs through combat moves that would be lethal to an organic opponent. 

Kaidan observes his XO use her impressive N7 skills on the heavy bag and admits to himself that even without her badass biotics, she is still the most skilled soldier he’s ever seen, even with just her hands. Before his wild imagination can run away with his thoughts about what else her talented hands could do, he mumbles, ‘Where did the heavy bag come from? I thought the Commander blew up the only one we had.’

Joker laughs and answers his unasked question, “Our requisition officer got it from what was left of the security forces on X57 before we left. They weren’t going to use it anymore and since we were sans one heavy bag, the Captain authorized the purchase of another.”

Grimacing after observing another impressive combat move from his XO in the next room setting the heavy bag swinging wildly, Kaidan winces, “Maybe we should rescue this one from the same fate.”

“Not yet. Note to the wise, when Reza is playing ‘Disturbed’ or other bands like it, it is best not to interrupt her. She is working out her demons.” Joker pauses when another song starts playing; ‘Rage Against the Machine: Killing in the Name,’ and Reza continues to beat the shit out of the bag with both her hands and her feet as she hits it again and again. Yep, still angry… “Just wait. She’s not ready to be around her friends, yet.”

Listening to the song and noting it on his omni-tool again, Kaidan looks back at his friend and recognizes the look of worry that crosses Joker’s face. When the lyrics of ...[‘Killing in the name of…Killing in the name of…Now you do what they told ya…Are you under control, now you do what they told ya...’] they look at each other and then back at Reza noticing that she’s getting really wound up. When the lyrics of ...[‘Fuck you, I won’t do what you tell me…’] comes over the speakers, they both flinch, since Reza yells it out along with the music. 

However, they stay quiet and wait to see what happens, when the music pauses and Reza slows long enough to bring up her omni-tool to pick another song; ‘Disturbed: The Vengeful One.’ Once the music picks up, Reza starts in on the heavy bag again, more violent than the last time and instead starts to radiate with power, her biotics sparking. Kaidan’s arm hairs stand on end and his teeth ache at the amount of power that she is emitting as she continues to attack the bag. Holy Shit! Both he and Joker watch transfixed. At the apex of the song, Reza’s power completely envelopes her and she uses all of her energy into a biotic kick powerful enough to rip the fasteners of the heavy bag from the hook in the ceiling and smash into the bulkhead at the other end of the gym. This efficiently makes it break apart in a shower of cloth and sand. So much for their new heavy bag… 

Breathing heavily and leaning over to rest her hands on her thighs, Reza blinks in surprise at the mighty destruction of another heavy bag and shakes her head, laughing out loud.  
.  
.  
.  
“There she is…she’s back,” Joker exclaims as he watches Reza smile and turn back toward the lockers to wipe her sweaty face with a towel and drink more water.

Looking at his fellow snooper, Kaidan states, “You know her well…”

“Yeah, I told you that she’s my best friend. By the way, she’ll be okay now.”

“Should we go in? I don’t want to intrude if she needs more time.” Kaidan asks, hesitant to now call attention to his presence. 

“Let’s see what mood she’s in now that she’s got her aggression out about Eden Prime,” Joker says cautiously.

Sitting on the bench, Reza wraps the towel around her neck and looks through her music on her omni-tool and grins when she comes across another favorite song. Hitting play, she relaxes a bit when it plays.

...[‘I put my armor on, show you how strong I am. I put my armor on, I’ll show you that I am. I’m unstoppable…I’m invincible…Yeah, I win every single game. I’m so powerful…’] (Sia: Unstoppable)

When his wife starts to sing along, Joker grins and with his eyes shining, he looks over at Kaidan and nods, “Oh yeah, she is doing much better. She listens to this song when she feels empowered and is ready to continue fighting.”

“She’s an amazing woman,” Kaidan says in awe as he closes his eyes to listen to Reza sing; letting her luscious voice drip over him, making him shiver. So beautiful…and sexy as hell. 

Looking lovingly at his wife, Joker agrees wholeheartedly with his friend’s assessment of her, forgetting his ire at Kaidan’s unintended voyeurism. “Yes, she is.” Just as the song ends, Reza looks directly at him from her seated position on the bench and winks. ‘Ha!’ Shaking his head, Joker smirks at her when he realizes that she knew all along that he was watching her. Of course she knew he was there. There was no sneaking up on his wife. Before he can motion to her that she has another visitor, she starts singing another song, her eyes smoldering with desire and what can only be arousal, as she looks at him. ‘Uh oh…’ Thank goodness Kaidan’s position is hidden from a direct line of sight, because it’s instantly obvious that her song affects him, making him gasp, his cheeks reddening.

...[‘Baby, I wanna touch you. I wanna breathe into your will. See, I gotta hunt you. I gotta bring you to my hell. Baby, I wanna fuck you. I wanna feel you in my bones. Boy, I’m gonna love you. I’m gonna tear into your soul. Desire, I’m hungry. I hope you feed me. How do you want me, how do you want me? How do you want me, how do you want me?...’] (Meg Myers: Desire)

‘Oh fuucckkk Rez…’ How the hell does he explain to Kaidan why Reza is singing about wanting to fuck his brains out…which clearly he is fine with…normally...just not when they have a third wheel in attendance. 

...[‘Honey, I wanna break you. I wanna throw you to the hounds. Yeah, I gotta hurt you. I gotta hear from your mouth. Boy, I wanna taste you. I wanna skin you with my tongue. I’m gonna kill you. I’m gonna lay you in the ground. Desire, I’m hungry. I hope you feed me. How do you want me, how do you want me? How do you want me, how do you want me?...’]

Breaking eye contact with his wife, Joker looks at Kaidan and says sheepishly trying to deflect with humor, “Apparently she is now running through all the emotions and now is horny as hell. Don’t worry; I’ll tease her about it,” and winces when Kaidan looks at him in horror. 

Looking like a deer in headlights, Kaidan grabs his duffel from the floor where he had dropped it while Reza was singing and covers his front, having another hard on, and bolts. Halfway down the hallway, he turns remembering his manners and almost tripping over his own feet, blurts, “Gotta go…see you later, Joker.” 

Kaidan beats feet and hurries down the corridor until he gets to the men’s room and strips in record time before he enters the shower stall, giving into the urge he had earlier to take out his frustration on himself. The difference is that now he has fodder for many more wet dreams after watching his XO workout her stress from their mission. 

Plus, her voice…Holy hell! That last song, oh fuck, those words had gone straight to his cock and his libido had roared to life once again. If he hadn’t left when he did…Oh Gods! He would have come in his pants. Her display of her unparalleled biotic power, her unclothed state, plus that voice…Oh Gods…Ahhh…  
.  
.  
.  
Watching his friend depart in a hurry, Joker frowns, ‘Huh. I wonder what that was all about.’ Then he shrugs and turns back around, when the door to the gym slides open and grins at his wife, who is leaning against the door frame in her famous stance. 

With a raised eyebrow, Reza smirks at her voyeuristic husband. “Enjoying the view, babe?”

{{{}}}

“Well, the count is now four rooms down, and many to go. Although, truthfully, I never thought the gym was this comfortable,” Reza states climbing off of Joker, to grab some towels. She rolls one up and uses one as a pillow for her dazed husband having been pounced on as soon as he entered the gym, and another to cover him from the waist down. Situating herself with a towel, as well, she lies down to face her husband as he catches his breath. 

“Huh?” Joker mutters, barely able to form words after the vigorous ‘workout’ they just participated in. 

Giggling, Reza leans up on her elbow and looks at her husband as he stares up at the ceiling with sex glazed eyes and strokes his sweat soaked chest. Dipping her fingers down to rub against his lower abs and the top of the towel that was draped across his lap. “I told you that first day that we were going to christen every room in this ship. Well, so far, we’re four rooms down.”

“Uh…it’s actually five rooms, babe,” Joker corrects her, finally able to get his other brain to start working.

“Oh?”

Turning on his side to match his wife’s position, Joker smirks at her. “Yes. Let me refresh your memory. 1) our quarters, 2) the men’s head on the CIC deck, 3) the comm room, 4) the gym, and remember the store room a couple of days ago? That’s five.”

Reza grimaces as she remembers, “Remind me not to have that bright idea again. Buckets are not very comfortable to sit on.”

“You’re telling me…I had an indentation of a sponge on one of my butt cheeks for most of the morning afterward.”

Reza grins and hides her mouth with her hand before giving in and laughing at him. He frowns at her and reaches up to flick her nose in irritation, making her laugh even harder for him to use one of her gestures. She waggles her eyebrows at him, “The sex was good though.”

“The sex is always good with you, babe. I’m not knocking your idea on christening every room on the Normandy…especially since I get sex out of the deal.” He grins at her when she gently swats him good naturedly, “Let’s just check the store room off as a onetime occasion, okay?”

“Agreed.”

“Mostly, I’m looking forward to christening the most important area on this ship…to me that is.” 

“Hmm, knowing you as I do…it has to be the bridge. More specifically…your chair.”

“HmmMmm,” Joker purrs and brushes his hand down his wife’s cheek and thumbs over her lips. Then he trails his fingertips down her throat across her shoulder and leans into her to pull her closer so he can nibble on her throat as he finally finds his destination and cups one of her breasts making her moan. The idea of her riding him in his chair has gotten him hot and bothered again. Plus, he did notice her beautifully red tipped breasts jiggling in front of him when she was laughing at him. He’s pretty sure that Reza had deliberately left them bared just so he would notice. She was devious like that…something he took advantage of frequently, and endeared her to him even more. This was just another trait of hers that he found deliciously wonderful. Moaning, Reza arches her back to give him better access and pulls away the towel from his quickly hardening cock and starts stroking him. 

Thank the Gods that they had locked the door and shut the blinds. Apparently, they weren’t done with this new location, yet. 

{{{}}}

Later after their second time, they had fun getting dressed again and shambling off to their quarters just in time to have their third. Apparently, after having a near death experience with a foreign object spewing warnings of doom and gloom makes for a sex-athon, until they can’t see strait. 

Resting a bit after their latest tryst, Reza is playing with her husband’s hair and beard as he lays his head in her lap looking up at her. Getting a happy mumble out of him as she massages his scalp, Reza smiles down at him. “Feeling better?”

“Hmm Mm,” Joker murmurs closing his eyes, enjoying the feel of his wife’s fingers running through his hair. “What about you?”

“You always make me feel better.”

Proud of himself, Joker smirks, “You’re only saying that because you climaxed…eight times, was it?” 

“It was nine times actually…but who’s counting?”

Joker opens his eyes and sits up to gather his wife into his arms, tucking her head into the nook between his head and shoulders, wrapping his legs with hers. “I love you, wife.”

Humming in contentment, Reza tips his head down to kiss him briefly, “I love you too, husband.”

Joker sighs happily. He loves it when he and Rez have enough time to enjoy just being together like this. The afterglow…the overall completeness of who they are together. “You know I can’t live without you, right?”

“Ditto.”

Pulling back from her to look into her eyes, his brow furrows, “I’m being serious here, Rez. I would be lost without you. You need to come back to me…I don’t want to ever repeat how I felt during those 15 hours you were out. It was torture…”

Hesitating briefly, Reza looks up at him. “You know I can’t promise…”

“I know…” Joker interrupts and sighs. 

Reza pulls his head down to kiss him again, smoothing out his furrowed brow. Afterwards, she adds, “You’re my home…my safe haven…my best friend… my lover…my husband. Without you, I am nothing. Know this…if I’m able, I will always come back to you. You are my soulmate.”

“Damn straight.”

“How long do we have before you have to get back to your station?”

Joker checks the time on his omni-tool and sighs, “About…four hours. I have to get back to calculate the relay jump to the Widow Nebula.” 

“Will you hold me until then?” Reza asks snuggling into him and pulling the sheets up to cover them. 

“Always,” Joker smiles and lays his head upon hers, kissing her on the forehead. After noticing her try to hide a yawn, he adds, “Why don’t you try and get some sleep? I’m right here.”

Reza hums in agreement and yawns again, almost immediately going to sleep.

{{{}}}

Six hours plus change later, Reza has taken up residence in the co-pilot’s chair after bringing Joker his requisite cup of sugar laden coffee. Since waking up from the beacon incident, she has been ordered to rest until they dock at the Citadel. As such, she has joined her husband in the bridge, keeping him company, as she catches up on the mission reports. 

Watching him calculate the upcoming jump and navigate through his haptic displays, she zones in on his hands and suddenly feels a little hot. She’s always loved to watch him pilot. There was just something about how he was able to fly with such finesse and all it took was a push of a few buttons. She had passable piloting skills…having had to take the basic flight class during her ‘N’ training, but there was just something so incredibly sexy about the way that Joker did it. He was a natural. Licking her lips, she rubs her thighs together and tries to get comfortable when she becomes wet just thinking about how dexterous her husband is with his hands. 

Chuckling wickedly, Joker swipes the panels he’s been using to calculate the jump closed and looks at his wife. “Are you okay? You look a little flushed.”

Narrowing her eyes at him, she huffs, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Uh huh, I see you squirming over there,” he says and wriggles all ten fingers as he looks over at her. He’s perfectly aware that she finds his piloting skills a turn on. She’s told him more than once that she gets hot and bothered watching him work. 

Reza makes an indelicate noise, being caught panty soaked as it were, which makes his teasing her so much worse. Not appreciating his raucous laughter, Reza flips him off.

“Oooo!” Waggling his eyebrows at her, Joker points towards his feet. “There’s room under the dash if you want to take advantage of me. It might be a tight fit, but we can work something out,” he grins evilly at her. Just as she is about to retort with a witty comeback, a light flashes on his console, “Ah, saved by the bell,” he smirks and opens the comm channel.

“Joker! How long till we reach the Citadel?” Captain Anderson asks over the line.

“About another hour, sir. We caught a break in the relay traffic to the Widow Nebula and have been given permission to jump to the front of the line, so to speak.”

“Good. Tell the Commander, she needs to suit up and be ready with Alenko and Williams to follow me to the Ambassador’s office upon arrival. We have been summoned.”

“Aye-aye, sir. She is here with me now.”

“Excellent. Commander… see me ASAP after you suit up.”

Reza shares a look with Joker, “Yes, sir.”

“Anderson out.”

Wincing, Reza stands up and walks around the partition to stand at her husband’s side. Looking back at the gangway leading to the CIC, she bites her lip, “That sounds ominous.”

Taking her hand, Joker brings her hand up to his lips to kiss it. 

Looking down at him, Reza flips her hand around and brushes his cheek along his beard and tips his head up to kiss him briefly, making him groan. Straightening into her Commander pose, she states, “Carry on, Flight Lieutenant.”

“Aye-aye, ma’am.”

She gives him a small wave and walks away. Whatever the Captain has to say, since he didn’t once switch to calling her Reza, must be quite serious. Since, joining the crew, David had always started out the day with a hug or a personal quip, but never started the day straight to business like today. Something was definitely the matter. Maintaining her professional outlook, she hurries down the steps to the crew deck toward what is to become a very long day. 

{{{}}}

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hope you enjoyed the interactive experience I created for Reza's workout scene. These songs seemed appropriate & you got more Femshep/Joker goodness. They are so good together. I feel all mushy after writing a fluffy scene. And, poor Kaidan, having to finish himself off after inadvertantly becoming a voyeur. I'm so mean...
> 
> Next chapter hint...  
> Reza reveals all and we meet the rest of the squad. Yay! Wrex, Garrus, & Tali.


	13. Bad Day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N Thanks for all the comments and kudos. 
> 
> Finally had the time to finish this chapter. Enjoy!

{{{}}}

“…and that’s why I don’t like politicians,” Ashley exclaims after their Ambassador leaves his chambers in a huff. The gall of the guy for blaming the shit-storm that Eden Prime turned out to be, on their XO and Captain Anderson. Asshole. 

Reza looks at the Chief and then at Kaidan’s appalled expression before turning back towards her mentor as he sighs, his shoulders tense, and then leans on the partition that overlooks the Presidium. Joining him, she mumbles so only he can hear her and bumps his elbow, “What a butthead…”

Anderson grimaces and rolls his eyes, reflecting back at the way the buffoon had laid the blame on his and his protégé’s shoulders…as if the invasion of the Geth was done only to ruin Udina’s day. Selfish bastard. Clearly, the guy has some balls for accusing two highly trained N7 elite operatives; one of them dubbed the ‘Butcher of Torfan,’ and two heavily armed Marines; to their faces no less, that the disaster of the destroyed beacon was their fault. What a mess… Looking at his goddaughter, Anderson notices that she’s keeping a tight rein on her biotics and looking quite irked. Trying to be diplomatic, a trait that he wishes he could instill in her, he nods towards the exit. “I know Udina is not your favorite person in the galaxy, but you have to understand that the beacon on Eden Prime was to be a boon for humanity within Council space. It was to help solidify our request to be treated as equals.”

“You don’t think I know that? It wasn’t my fault that the beacon hijacked me and then exploded. The nightmares alone haven’t been all about fluffy bunnies, you know. They’re horrendous and no one should have to see what I’ve seen or was subjected to. The images are disjointed at best, but some of them…I can’t even describe…they’re…” Reza grabs her head as if she’s in pain. “I’ve seen some awful shit before…you know that. But, what that beacon showed me…” she shakes her head and grimaces, and looks down to hide the cold shivers that suddenly engulf her. 

Anderson wraps an arm around her, seeing the strain of her experience cross her face. 

Not knowing what they’re talking about, Kaidan, having recognized what can only be a possible migraine forming, he walks over and gently taps his XO on the shoulder, making her pull away from the Captain, and look at him expectantly. Wordlessly, he grins and gives her a protein bar, one of her favorites. 

Smiling her thanks, which elicits a flush of color on his cheeks, Reza takes the ‘Dark Ecstasy’ flavored bar from him and frowns when she notices Ashley’s smirk before Kaidan retreats to stand next to her once again. ‘What was that look for?’ Reza thinks to herself before dismissing it and taking a small bite as she turns back towards her mentor. Seeing the apology written all over her godfather’s face, she swallows another bite and asks, “Is the Ambassador really blaming Nihlus’ death on me? How could he…”

David puts a hand on her shoulder and motions her to wait. Looking at the Lt and the Chief waiting calmly for orders, he asks them to wait in the hallway, until they are done talking. After they salute and leave, the Lt hesitating a moment too long as he looks at his XO eating the bar he gave her, David sighs and turns towards his goddaughter to reply. “I don’t think Udina is blaming you, no. He’s just frustrated by what’s happened. We all are. There’s another thing we need to worry about. With Nihlus dead, your candidacy for Spectre doesn’t look good, Rez. I know Nihlus gave his preliminary/final evaluation to his superior before he died, but I can’t honestly say what the outcome will be now that he’s gone.”

Looking up suddenly, Reza remembers, “Before the mission, Nihlus pulled me aside and gave me a data-chip to give to Councilor Sparatus, should anything happen to him. He knew…we both did…that something foreboding was on the horizon. But no one could have predicted that shit show. Yet, I think he knew that he wouldn’t be coming back and that is why he went off alone. I don’t know…”

“Eden Prime was a C.F. of a mission if I ever saw one. I agree. And, someone as experienced as Nihlus would know if something was off. He cared about you greatly Rez. Actually, I think he was in love with you. Knowing Turians as I do, I think he was protecting you by going off alone. Turians have protective instincts and after witnessing his reaction to your kindness for getting him his favorite meal the other day, it was obvious that he cared greatly for you.”

Reza shakes her head in denial, “He loved me? I knew that he cared a great deal for me as I did for him, but as a partner, a colleague, a friend…not anything romantic. He knew that I was married.”

David huffs out a laugh, “Yes, well, being married doesn’t necessarily mean you are happy in your marriage. Obviously, once you spend a little time with the two of you, anyone would recognize that you and Jeff are extremely happy together. I know this, your father knows this, but until someone gets to see you together, it’s not obvious because of not being able to talk about it. Anyway, based on my observations of Nihlus when you weren’t looking, he definitely was in love with you. He hid it well. I just happen to know Turian gestures and body language better than most. The luxury of serving in the First Contact war, I guess.”

Huh…remembering the gesture that Nihlus made to her when she surprised him with the meal, Reza cocks her head to the side and asks her godfather, curious as to the answer. “What does it mean when a Turian lays his forehead upon yours?”

David’s eyebrows raise and then he coughs out a laugh. Seeing her look of confusion, he says, “Sneaky bastard…he obviously thought you wouldn’t know what that meant. I’m impressed. He definitely had a quad for trying that gesture on you, knowing that if you knew what that meant, he probably would have had his ass handed to him…and rightly so.”

Frowning at him, Reza leans into one hip and folds her arms over her armored chest, “And…don’t leave me in suspense, David.”

“He gave you a kiss.”

“What?”

David laughs…yeah this was going to be fun. “That’s a ‘kiss’ in his culture. It allows for him to savor the scent of his intended. He definitely had romantic feelings for you, because only bonded Turians kiss in that way.” Looking at her angry expression and failing at trying to contain his mirth at the situation, he tilts his head at her and asks. “Hmm, I’m curious, did he ever scent you?”

“What?” This second exclamation was decidedly in another octave. 

“Did you ever catch him sniffing you? It’s their way of recognizing whether a mate is compatible with them or not.”

Frowning at him as his words swirled around in her head, Reza thought back to all of her and Nihlus’ missions together. Remembering one such incident, she gasps; putting a hand over her mouth, as she remembers back to the first time Nihlus had covertly sniffed her. Glaring at her godfather when he starts to chuckle at her reaction, she huffs at him and looks down as the memory surrounds her. 

…They had just returned to their shared apartment on the Citadel, after a successful infiltration of a warlord’s enclave in the bowels of the wards. Having wanted to wash off the stench of blood and gore as soon as possible, Reza had just let down her hair and started to strip off her armor, when Nihlus had suddenly invaded her personal space, looking shocked and confused. Thinking it was because this was the first time she had worn her hair down in front of the Turian, she had just stood there, surprised at the intrusion. Just as he lowered his head to apparently sniff her, she had shoved him away playfully, laughing about needing personal space and if he wasn’t careful, she wouldn’t hesitate to share the wealth. Meaning the abundance of ‘human’ stink she was sporting after the day they just had in the sewers. She had figured that that was enough of a threat, so the Turian would leave her alone until she at least had a shower, but he had just stood there, breathing deeply and looking at her strangely. After another few awkward moments of having Nihlus stare at her, he moved as if he was mesmerized and raised a talon to take a tendril of her hair, lifting it to his nose as he inhaled deeply. Just as she was about to react by shoving him again, he reared his head back, dropping her hair as he looked at her again…a surprised and intrigued look about him. After another awkward silence descended upon them, Nihlus turned on his heel and left her alone, never having said a word. Looking after him in confusion, she shrugged as soon as she heard his bedroom door shut, and continued to remove her armor. 

Not understanding at the time, she had just figured that he was disgusted by her human stench and strange hair. This was before their partnership had improved and their pairing was still new. Actually, now that she thinks about it, it was after that strange incident that their bond had strengthened into a true partnership… 

Holy shit! Nihlus had feelings for her…wow…that explained everything. It seemed as though he was as shocked as she is now. No wonder he had taken so long to return to her after disappearing into his own space. It all made sense, now. “Son of a…sneaky bastard is correct. That Turian…” Reza says as she rolls her eyes and shakes her head, smiling in remembrance. 

“Why do you think your father and I kept warning you about Nihlus? We knew that he was exhibiting signs of interest in you. It doesn’t matter to Turians if their intended is already married. They will pursue you no matter what, if given the chance. They are often polyamorous. I’ve seen several males with one female, at times.”

“Ugh…” Reza shakes her head and waves his last statement aside as she hones in on her mentor’s worry over her. “I just thought you two were being overprotective. You should have told me…I’m just saying. It would have saved him from having to use medi-gel those few times when I became annoyed with him for being obnoxious and trying to ‘blow off steam’ with me. I knew what that meant.”

David laughs, yeah; he can imagine how annoyed Reza would have become with the Turian for trying to bed her. Although the more she ‘fought’ with him over it, the more turned on he would get. Turians liked to chase or stalk prey, her being the prey. “It seemed to me after you two boarded the Normandy that you worked things out to an amicable relationship since your rocky start.”

A pained expression comes over her and she quietly nods in agreement. “It was more than that. He was my Turian best friend, David. I’ve known other Turians, but no one who had my back like Nihlus did. He was an amazing friend and I will miss him terribly. I need to avenge him, David. Please help me do so.”

“Of course. Speaking of which, let me meet up with Udina and you go gather your squad so we can find out why Saren is behind all of this madness. He’s a corrupt Spectre that needs to be taken down. I know him or at least I’ve worked with him in the past. He needs to be discredited and brought in for judgment for his crimes.” Stepping close to her, he gives her a hug. “Come on; let’s get this show on the road.”

“Lay on Macduff…”

Recognizing the quote, David laughs and precedes her out of the office.

<<<>>>

“Garby!”

Reza exclaims loudly as she and her squad exits the elevator at the top of the Citadel tower. This was a nickname for her second favorite Turian, one he hated, but was well worth his reaction to it. She smiles at him, when he turns to look at her, and laughs as she notices him shaking his head and motioning towards his companion. Noticing who he’s talking to, she winks at him and mouths a gag, making him chuckle. 

Also turning towards their uninvited interloper, the head of Citadel Security, Executor Pallin, huffs in annoyance and walks away, knowing that any more discussion with Officer Vakarian on the matter of their investigation into the Spectre, Saren, was useless and will be ignored by this particular infuriating human. Having worked with her in the past and how she bulldozed over regulations he holds dear, she was a menace. She was also a bad influence on his officers. Already fed up with this officer’s inane need to put his talons where he shouldn’t, he storms off. He has better things to do. 

“Lieutenant Commander…” the younger Turian exclaims and nods his head in respect, waiting for her to join him. He hasn’t seen her in over six months, but he knew she was on the station, of course. He was working the same case as her, but more importantly, he was glad to see her. His subvocals purring in anticipation when he breathes in her scent as she and her companions join him near the fountain. Hmmm, he pauses a moment to let her scent waft over him making his plates shift in arousal. Feeling suddenly uncomfortable, as they are in mixed company; noting the humans flanking her, he is distracted when Reza sticks her tongue out at the departing Turian and snickers. “He’s not your biggest fan, either Rez.”

Reza sticks her lower lip out and pouts. “Oh boohoo…I pissed him off. What else in new,” she huffs at him and then grins. “How’s my Garby doing?”

“Would you quit with the nickname? It makes me sound like a 5 year old.”

Reza smirks at him and pulls him down for a quick hug, flustering him. Giving into his friend’s need to embarrass him in public in front of strangers no less…Garrus in turn wraps his arms around her, happy to hold her, even briefly. Although, public displays of affection were never something he was wont to do, he allows it anyway, especially with this female. Reza was special to him. If she wasn’t already bonded, he would be initiating one with her. This was an act that still shocks him to this day, having never been attracted to humans before. Although, it seemed at the time of his involvement in her case, he wasn’t the only Turian to be interested in her that way. It was a shame about what happened to Nihlus. He was a good Spectre and mentor. He had known Nihlus for many years. Their families were distantly related and when Garrus had shown interest in becoming a Spectre, before he had joined C-Sec and his father squashed his dreams, Nihlus had taken him under his wing. 

So, when Nihlus had been paired up with the infamous human Commander, Garrus had been brought in as a consultant to their case, which was when he had met her. Not having much experience with humans previously, he was skeptical at first, but that didn’t last long, the time spent with the human female was one of the best few weeks of his life. She was a force to be reckoned with and easy to work with, besides. She had disarmed him both physically and emotionally. They had sparred many times, her always winning, and any residual grievance he may had about humans in general were all forgotten after only a few hours with the enigmatic female. Plus, her smell…oh spirits, he was a goner. That was of course when he found out she was bonded already. Although Turians were known to pursue their prey even if they were technically unavailable, he wouldn’t do it out of respect for her and her mate. He still hadn’t met the human male that had snagged the great Lieutenant Commander, but he was looking forward to it. So instead, they had become fast friends. 

Pulling back, she turns to look at her companions, “This is Garrus Vakarian, C-Sec officer extraordinaire. This is my squad, Staff Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko and Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams. They were the team I had with me on Eden Prime.”

Garrus nods his head at them in respect. He had read the mission brief. They were a formidable pairing. But, they would be, wouldn’t they…being led by none other than Shepard, herself. As the silence settles among them, he notes right away that the Lt seems uncomfortable with his familiarity with his XO and Williams is dubious of his involvement and is openly glaring at him. Hmm…it seems that Reza has another fan and the Chief may have a grudge against him…or maybe all non-humans. Dismissing them temporarily, he warns his friend as he turns towards her. “Prepare yourself, Reza. This is going to be a bloodbath. There isn’t enough evidence, at the moment, to convict Saren. Plus, he’s a Spectre. That by itself will hinder the investigation. All records are classified.” Hanging his head in shame, he adds, “I didn’t have the resources or the time to find enough to help you in this. I’m sorry, my friend.”

Reza sighs and takes his hand in hers, squeezing it. “It’s okay, Garrus. I know you did your best. There’s nothing to be sorry about. We’ll get him…some way or another. Count on it.” Releasing his hand, she looks determinedly at her squad, “Alright, let’s get this show on the road.” Nodding her head at Garrus in farewell, she grins at him, “See you later?”

“Absolutely! I have other leads to follow up on in the meantime. I’ll contact you if I come across anything that will help your investigation.”

“Deal.” Reza grins at him in farewell, before hurrying after her squad as they go to meet their Captain and the inevitable let down from the Council on the plight of the humans who lost their lives at Eden Prime. Plus, one well known Spectre…

{{{}}}

“Well, fucking hell…that went as well as I thought it would.” Reza huffs in annoyance as she and her squad hung back at the railing of one of the balconies that overlooked the council chambers. 

They had gotten quite the backlash of comments for the destruction of the beacon and their accusations towards one of their highly respected Spectres, by the Council. Apparently the evidence they had of a disreputable human who was stealing from his own race and their firsthand experience of what happened on EP, wasn’t enough, to strip Saren of his status. Shocker. 

In hindsight though…Reza didn’t think it would be enough. Not to prove the Council was right in their assessment…shitheads that they were, but Garrus had been right. The situation was dire and turning out to be a shitstorm. A shitty shitty shitstorm. 

What was worse?...was the dirty looks she couldn’t dismiss from the Turian Councilor, Decian Sparatus. It wasn’t a secret that he despised humans and often said as much whenever a human matter had to be voted upon. Which, by the way, fucking sucked, since apparently as a Counselor, he was supposed to be neutral in all matters. Yeah right. Oh, yeah, one more little piece of goodness was, he was Nihlus’ uncle. Holy Shit. That little detail could’ve been explained to her before mouthing off to him about how Nihlus had died. Fuck. Shit. Fucking Shit. 

Plus, he couldn’t keep the disdain in his eyes as he looked on at her during their discussion. It was obvious he was disgusted that she had the audacity to even speak in front of him. Jackass. At least the other two councilors were at least professional in their demeanors, if only slightly. The Asari Councilor, Tevos, was at least fair-minded enough to note that they didn’t have any evidence against Saren (which was true) and ceded that the beacon destruction was a separate matter from awarding the status of Spectre, or not. That topic was sidelined for now, or at least until they found the evidence they needed to take down Saren. To top the triad off was the Salarian Councilor…pfft, what a joke. A sniveling weasel if she ever saw one and couldn’t make a decision on his own without guidance from the other two. Perfect, just perfect…this day kept getting better and better. Not. 

They had been waiting for their Ambassador to finish ‘discussing’ at length what had conspired with the Captain after the meeting. Reza had tensed as soon as Udina had asked to speak with Anderson privately and had moved off. Actually, she and her squad were finding it frustrating as all hell that the Ambassador had summarily dismissed them and was probably laying the blame on how the discussion went, squarely on Anderson’s shoulders. Especially, after the angry words he and Saren had during the meeting, which brought to mind that David had worked with the illustrious Spectre once before, making matters worse. 

“Commander…” Kaidan warns in a tone that reminds her that she wasn’t alone and wasn't allowed to do bodily harm to the insipid buffoon that their Ambassador was, for yelling at her beloved godfather. Oops…apparently, she had started to build biotic energy and releases it. 

Nodding her head at the Lieutenant, she sighs. Lowering her voice, she tilts her head towards him so only he would hear. “Thanks. I appreciate the reminder that I can’t throw our representative across the room. That wouldn’t make a very good impression. Maybe on the wall…but probably wouldn’t make our situation any better. It definitely would make me feel better…but, not good overall.”

Kaidan shakes his head, “Nope.”

“Big picture, right?”

“Yep.”

Reza grins at him and he chuckles. They share a smile. 

“Commander.”

Reza straightens and puts her arms behind her back and awaits Anderson as he strides back to them after the Ambassador storms off. 

{{{}}}

“No fucking way!”

“Reza…”

“No! He can’t take you off the case. This is your mission.”

“He can and he did.”

“Why?”

“You know why.”

“Shit.”

“Shit indeed.”

Reza deflates and looks down at the ground and shakes her head in dismay. They are silent for a few minutes as she tries without success to think of any alternatives that would reinstate David. Nothing comes to mind. Damnit! A creak of armor makes her raise her head and look at her squad; seeing that they are confused and little frustrated at not being in on the details behind her outrage.

“Captain Anderson, sir,” Reza pauses when he focuses on her, “Could you explain to my squad, the reasons behind why you’ve been removed? It isn’t my place.” 

Anderson nods and informs her team what occurred 20 years ago during his consideration for Specterhood and his run in with Saren. As he does so, Reza starts strategizing how to get out of the mess they have found themselves in. 

“That’s messed up, sir,” Williams exclaims at the end of his explanation.

“Indeed.”

“So what now?” Kaidan asks.

Reza speaks up, knowing that David will refer to her, now that she is technically in charge of finding the evidence they need to prove Saren’s involvement. “Now, we do whatever it takes to take Saren down. If removing his Spectre status is the first step, then that’s how we proceed.”

“I have a few ideas about that. But, I need time to ferret out of few of my contacts, first.” Captain Anderson looks at his protégé, “In the meantime, Commander, authorize leave for the crew and yourself. You’ve earned it.”

“Yes sir.”

“Alenko and Williams, can you give us a few minutes?”

Kaidan and Ashley nod and walk down the stairs and into the main council chambers to await their XO. Looking back at his goddaughter, David joins her at the railing and sighs. “Are you actually going to take any leave?”

“Of course, sir,” Reza smiles impishly, not meaning a word of it.

David chuckles and nods, knowing she’s not telling him the truth. “Take a few hours, at least. You’ve been through enough these last couple of days. Once my contacts come through, you won’t be getting much free time, until this is over, I’m thinking. This mission will take precedence over anything else, so...take a breather.”

Reza nods in understanding and internally vows to start the process as soon as she can and fuck the shore leave. David means well, but she has evidence to find. Evidence that will prove that the asshole Saren, killed her friend in cold blood and simultaneously take him down for his attack on EP. “I do have a few contacts of my own, David.”

“I know. Just a few hours…for me…or at least take your husband out for dinner or something. He’s as stubborn as you and won’t leave his station unless coerced. Besides, I think your parents would like to see you.”

Reza blinks at him in surprise, “My parents are here?”

“They will be. They come in at 1900, this evening.”

“Both of them?”

“Your mother’s tour just ended and she’s on shore leave until she gets new orders. Steven mentioned that after hearing about your run in with the beacon, they decided to take a few days on the Citadel.”

“Huh…”

Not really surprised that Reza hadn’t heard from her mother about their surprise visit, knowing that their relationship is still strained after the Torfan incident, David sighs. “Just think about it, okay?”

“Okay.”

David sees movement out of the corner of his eye and looks to see that Alenko is starring at Reza and quickly looks away, blushing a little at his attention. Sighing, he elbows Reza to get her attention from her thoughts. Nodding towards where her squad is waiting for her, he adds, “At least, take this opportunity to talk to your Lieutenant…you know, about his attraction to you. He hasn’t been very subtle about it. It’s time. Head this off before there are feelings hurt, Rez. Let me know if you need me to transfer him. I don’t need this distraction on top of everything else that’s happened.”

Reza had jerked her head to look at the person in question and then back at her Captain, seeing his pleading expression. Nodding in agreement, Reza sighs. “Yeah, you’re right. It’s time.” She didn’t want to hurt him. Plus, it was only fair to her husband. Especially, since they were all friends. Straightening to attention, she salutes him. “Let me know if you have any leads.”

Returning her salute, Anderson nods and dismisses her. 

{{{}}}

On their way out of the Citadel Tower, Reza leans against the back of the elevator as Kaidan and Ashley stand at the window that overlooks the view of the Presidium. She’s seen it before. Her parents have an apartment here and she’s been here off and on her whole life. The Presidium was a beautiful fete of engineering. It was the epitome of Citadel living and housed all the embassies and other Consulate offices. It was also where the elite of the elite lived. Not her favorite place to visit, but the gardens were nice. She liked to jog the paths when she was here for visits. Maybe she will take a little time to herself. A jog on real turf may be what she needs to clear some of the beacon’s message out of her head. She’s interrupted in her musings by a soft voice. 

“Commander…”

Reza looks up, “Yes, Williams?”

“You’ve been here before, right? The Citadel, I mean?”

“Yes. I used to live here as a child and have been here off and on my whole life. Why?”

“I need to do a little shopping. All my gear and personal stuff…gone. I never thought to ask if my barracks survived after EP.”

Reza straightens, “Oh…of course. You will also need to visit Alliance HQ to requisition more uniforms and gear. Your transfer should have been sent through by now. I’ll need you to take care of your paperwork, while on shore leave.”

“Yes ma’am.”

“In the meantime, I’ll take you to the markets in the Wards.” As their long-ass elevator ride comes to a halt, they exit and walk to the nearest sky-cab stand. As they wait for their ride, Reza contacts Joker on the Normandy. “Shepard to the Normandy…”

“Go ahead…”

“Not sure if you’ve heard, but we’re grounded for the time being…”

“Yeah…the shit has hit the fan. We know.”

Reza rolls her eyes, “Tell me about it. Anyway, until we receive more information, we are on shore leave. 48 hours to start. Tell the crew.”

“Roger that.”

“You too, Joker.”

A scoff and then a pause, “…really?”

“Yep.”

“You too?”

“…yes.”

“…really?”

“Yes, Flight Lieutenant.”

Ah. It’s obvious, Rez is in mixed company. He sighs. “Roger that.”

“Talk to you later. I’m taking a cab to the markets with Williams… and Alenko.”

“Okay…” Joker responds not sure what Reza is trying to explain, catching the emphasis on Alenko’s name. 

When all she gets is silence, she adds, “Shepard out.”

{{{}}} 

Wanting to give the best tour to her squad mates since they are new to the Citadel, Reza takes them to the overlook in the Zakura Ward, next to the markets. As soon as they see the view of the busy city below through the window, they gasp and hurry to lean against the half wall to gape in wonder. Reza chuckles and follows them. This is a view she never tires of…having seen it many times before. It was fantastic. 

“Big place,” Kaidan gasps in awe at the view, his eyes big as he tries to take it all in. 

“That your professional opinion, sir?”

“He’s right, Chief. This isn’t just a station; it’s a city…one massive city. A city that rivals any other in the galaxy,” Reza explains, agreeing with Kaidan’s assessment. Simple…but accurate.

“There must be millions here. It can’t be possible to track everyone coming and going.” Kaidan adds to his observations. 

Ashley nods, “This makes Jump Zero look like a porta-john. And it’s the largest deep space station the Alliance has.” 

“Jump Zero was big. But this is a whole ‘nother scale. Look at the ward arms. How do they keep all that mass from flying apart?”

“That’s what you see here…engineering? Who cares about the ward arms? Look at the life here. This is not what I expected. In fact, I’m completely overwhelmed.” Ashley ignores the glare Kaidan gives her for dissing his observations and continues to stare at the view. “The council represents more races than I thought. No wonder they are careful with newcomers.”

Kaidan nods in agreement, shrugging off getting teased, “They probably just want to keep everything running. It has to be hard keeping all these cultures working together.” 

“…Or maybe they just don’t like humans,” Ashley huffs, thinking with her background that that could be possible. 

Trying to nip the anti-human talk in the bud as quickly as possible, Reza speaks up, “What’s not to like? We have oceans, beautiful women, this emotion called love. According to the old vids, we’ve got everything they want.” 

Kaidan laughs and without thinking about anything other than the view and the woman he’s starting to have feelings for, he huskily replies. “When you put it that way, there’s no reason they wouldn’t like you.” Shit. He gapes…did I just say that out loud? Quick, say something else. “I mean…us. Humans. Ma’am. “ Smooth. Shit. Kaidan looks away and rubs the back of his neck in embarrassment. 

Ashley sniggers as she sees Kaidan has flushed a deep red at his ability to ‘open mouth – insert foot,’ “You don’t take much shore leave. Do you, LT?”

“Okay…laugh it up, Chief. Let’s move on to the markets, shall we?” Letting her squad precede her, Reza frowns. Shit. Not subtle at all, Alenko. Damnit…it seems that feelings will get hurt today. Fuck. 

{{{}}}

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Yeah, I know...we are about to have 'the talk,' between Kaidan and Shepard. But, it must be done. In order for the story to move on...& Joker to be happy about having someone they can both confide in, well...a heart will be broken. 
> 
> For now... 
> 
> A/N: I rewrote the ME1 Observation deck discussion a little. This cutscene always makes me laugh. It's funny the way Kaidan (awkward as always) puts his foot in it. It's cute and endearing if a little gag worthy at the same time. :P


	14. Revelations - Part One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thanks for all the kudos and comments, thus far. Hadn't really expected to post another chapter so soon. But, I was on a roll and couldn't help myself. This chapter is rated 'M'. Enjoy!

{{{}}}

After following around Williams as she purchased personal items, meeting a fan, and getting roped into a possible interview with a nosy journalist should her investigation become juicy, Reza and Kaidan ended up at Alliance HQ; to store their armor and gear. Since Alliance HQ was more centrally located than the Normandy, it made sense to have their gear on hand, should they need it. 

Reza had just changed back into her uniform when she runs smack into Kaidan as they both leave the locker room. She was preoccupied reading the invitation from her father to meet up later and had not seen him before running into him. 

After he catches her from bouncing off of his chest, they laugh, at her clumsiness. “You okay, Commander?” Kaidan asks, still clutching onto her and tries not to stare into her beautiful lavender eyes or focus on the shape of her lips. Being this close to her, he could see every inflection of light that reflects in her eyes as she looks back at him, a flush of red staining her cheeks. 

Taking a step back to make his arms drop to his sides, Reza grins, “Yeah…I’m good. I need to watch where I’m going. Sometimes, I have a tendency to trip over my own two feet when I’m not paying attention. Thanks for catching me this time.” 

Kaidan grins, “No problem. I don’t mind playing hero for a damsel in distress.”

“Harhar…very suave and not funny…” Reza huffs at him for his teasing. Before he can move away, she quickly asks before losing her nerve, “Hey, do you have plans for the immediate future?”

“Nope. Free and clear. Why? Do you have a lead on our investigation? Should I go suit up again?”

“No. No new lead, yet. Wait…you’re on shore leave, mister. You should go have fun or something. Go sightsee.”

Kaidan narrows his eyes at her, “I have a feeling that you aren’t going to take a break, either. You looked quite determined when we were speaking with the Captain, earlier. I’ll just tag along, if you don’t mind. You could probably use the backup.”

“Probably…wait…shit.”

“Knew it.” Kaidan smiles, a knowing look about him. 

Reza rolls her eyes at him for calling her out. “Okay. Yes, you called it. I don’t plan on taking much time off. Once my friend contacts me, I’m off to see the wizard,” she smiles at her movie quote. 

“I know that one,” Kaidan says and internally adds another tick to his total for quotes he recognizes to buy her a drink for, if they ever find themselves in a bar. 

Reza nods at him and then frowns. “It seems wrong to take time off when that asshole, Saren, is still out there, pulling the wool over everyone’s eyes. I need to end him. And, I need to do it as quickly as I can.”

Also, getting back on track with their conversation, Kaidan agrees. “Okay. So what do you want to do? Where are we going?”

“Oh…uh, that wasn’t what I was asking about, actually. I was wondering if you wanted to get some coffee. I know a great place near here with a view of the botanical gardens.”

Kaidan jerks back, not expecting her to switch gears so quickly. Is she asking him out? Or was she finding a discrete place to yell at his ass for his tendency to insert his foot in his mouth, before thinking about who he was talking to and in front of. “Uh…sure.”

{{{}}}

“Oh, yum. This is great coffee.”

“Yep.”

“Is this where you get your stash?”

“Yeah, I found this place about 6 months ago. I did a favor for the owner and ever since, he puts aside his best Hazelnut brew for me, so I have a constant supply.”

Curious as to what type of favor that must have been, Kaidan holds off from asking knowing it may not be something she can discuss and settles into the bench they’re currently occupying. Looking at her expectantly, he takes another sip of the nectar of the gods and waits for her to start. When she purses her lips and stays silent, he sighs thinking the worst. “Uh…about what I said before, in the Wards… well, I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking and um…I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.” Shit. That’s not helping at all. He blushes in embarrassment and looks away. Awkward. 

Reza laughs briefly, “Actually, I thought it was sweet.”

That comment took him aback, “Really?”

“Yes. But inappropriate at the same time.”

“Oh,” he grimaces. “Sorry.”

Reza laughs again. “You have the cutest Canadian accent.”

“Huh…?” Kaidan sputters, not expecting that statement from left field.

“Sorry…” Reza grins at him as she mimics his accent on the word. Noticing he’s not laughing, she says sorry again in her own accent. “Anyway…we should talk about this.”

Uh oh. “About what?”

“About your attraction to me.”

Shit. “O…kay.”

“It’s not that I’m not flattered, because I am,” she says as she takes his hand and squeezes it, “You are a good man. It’s just…I’m not available.”

“OH!” Kaidan exclaims loudly and slumps against the back of the bench in dismay putting space between them. He shakes his head, his heart hammering in his chest, as it fills with disappointment which quickly turns to embarrassment. Rubbing both hands over his face, he looks at her again, “Of course you’re not available. It should have occurred to me that the great Commander Shepard was taken. I’m so stupid. I’m so very sorry for making you uncomfortable. Wait, I said that already. Well, I mean it. I’m not very good at this sort of thing. I’ve always found it difficult to talk to people I’m attracted to.”

“I’m not that great…and you aren’t stupid.”

Kaidan scoffs and jumps up to stand in front of her. “Seriously?” He begins to pace. “You’re Commander fucking Shepard. You’re not only a war hero, a survivor, and an elite N7 soldier, but a biotic goddess who is ranked at number one on the Alliance scale of power levels. You’re also a brilliant tactician and are unmatched in combat prowess. Trust me, I know. You broke through my Stasis field, which by the way I still can’t figure out how you did that. And, that maneuver we were able to pull off on the asteroid over Terra Nova? Brilliant…absolutely brilliant. And you came up with that on the fly? I don’t know anyone else who could have saved the scientists and taken care of the terrorist at the same time.” He pauses in his pacing and looks down at her, his eyes piercing through her. “Plus, you’re an amazing friend and a beautiful woman. I’m also going to say with the risk of being slammed into a wall again, that you are sexy as hell. There, I said it. Please don't hurt me. Anyone in their right mind would snatch you up in a heartbeat.”

“Kaidan…” Reza whispers with tears in her eyes, blushing at his compliments. “Come…sit down. Please.”

Kaidan sits in his vacated spot and digs into his pocket for a handkerchief and hands it over to her to wipe her eyes. “I didn’t mean to make you cry.”

“I know. I didn’t expect how it felt to hear how you see me. I guess I always focus on the negative aspects to my life. ‘The Butcher’ nickname being one of them. I forget sometimes that that isn’t what matters. Thank you for your kind words.”

“Anytime.” Kaidan pockets the handkerchief again after she hands it back to him. 

“So…are you going to be okay?” Reza asks hesitantly. 

“Yeah…I guess. Don’t get me wrong, it will take me awhile to get over you, or rather the thought of you with me, but it won’t distract me from our mission. You can still count on me.”

Reza jerks back and takes his hand in hers again. “I know that. I never thought to question you or your dedication to this mission. I need you here with me, Kaidan. You ground me. You keep me sane and in control of my tendencies to go off half-cocked. Plus, I need a friend I can confide in. Someone who can challenge me, if need be. Or give me a gentle nudge like you did in the council chambers, earlier. I really wanted to make an Udina sized hole in the wall. You stopped me. That takes guts.”

“Happy to oblige, ma’am.” A flicker of a grin tips Kaidan’s lips before slipping away as he stares at their linked hands. 

“But in reality… I really like having you around. As I said before, you’re a good man. However, if you feel like you don’t want to stay, that it’s too hard for you to be around me, I’ll…” she pauses as he squeezes her hand and puts his other hand on top. 

“Don’t. It’s not necessary, Reza, to finish that sentence.” He pulls her into a brief hug, quietly relishing how she feels in his arms before releasing her and sitting back to lean against the bench. “I’m here to stay. Being by your side through whatever we have to face to successfully complete this mission, I’m with you. And beyond…if you’ll have me,” he adds quietly, his heart in his throat. 

Reza grins at him and holds out her hand, “Friends…?”

Kaidan shakes her proffered hand, “Friends.”

{{{}}}

After that explosive revelation, they continue to sit side by side on the bench overlooking the gardens, while finishing their yummy roasted Hazelnut coffee, in companionable silence. 

After collecting their empty cups and depositing them in the closest recycling bin, Kaidan sits and looks curiously at his friend. “So…who is it you’re dating? Someone I know?”

“About that…you definitely know him.”

“Oh?”

“Mmmhmm…yeah, you’ve known him awhile.”

“Huh…” Kaidan frowns, thinking through the list of people he knows who could have met the Commander previously and suddenly gasps, instantly knowing who she is referring to. “Holy shit! It’s Joker, isn’t it?”

Reza grins, “How did you know?”

“It makes complete sense. The way you act together…the way you tease each other. It’s obvious, now that I’m thinking about it. Plus, he’s always so closed off about his personal life. I’ve never been able to get him to reveal who he sees when he goes off on shore leave.” Suddenly, Kaidan chuckles, “No wonder he’s never taken me up on my attempts to get him to go ‘trolling’ with me. Not that I’m very good at it, either,” he blushes suddenly thinking that she’ll see him in a different light, if he reveals how bad he is at hooking up during shore leave. Not that he does, often. 

Reza laughs and shakes her head. Yeah…trolling. She remembers doing that herself before ‘hooking up’ with Joker. “Oh yeah? I would have said ‘good luck with that,’ had I known. He’s not one to socialize much, introvert that he is. It doesn’t matter that he’s with someone. He’s worse than you for putting his foot in his mouth at the worst of times.”

Kaidan blushes and waves off her supposed insult, “Ha ha.” Still curious about them, he asks, “If he’s as you say, how did you guys get together? How long have you been dating each other?”

Reza shifts uncomfortably in her seat, “Um…there’s something else you need to know.”

“Yeah…?”

“We’re not just dating…”

Kaidan frowns and looks at her, his palms starting to sweat. Wait, she doesn’t mean…”You’re engaged.”

“More than that…” she explains, cringing internally, wondering what his reaction will be to the news of her marital status. So far, he's has been taking the news quite well. She recognizes the hurt and disappointment that he is trying to hide from her, but is impressed by his continued support of their friendship, no matter how much it hurts. It shows how much of an honorable man he is. Her respect for him has jumped several notches since starting this conversation. 

No. Say it isn’t so. Although internally he’s been berating himself for thinking like an asshole that he could still possibly have a chance with her, since dating wasn’t permanent, her last statement just killed all hope of that ever occurring. Looking devastated, he whispers, “You’re married.”

Cringing at seeing his facial expression, Reza nods. “Bingo.” 

Kaidan takes a few seconds to digest that and turns away, his heart breaking and turning to ice in his chest. 

Reza raises her hand to touch him, but thinks better of it and goes to stand to leave him to his thoughts, when he turns back around and grabs her hand, stalling her movement once again. Shaking his head, his eyes pleading desperately for her to stay with him, she nods and sits back, entwining her fingers with his, trying to lessen the pain by allowing the contact. 

Swallowing, his suddenly dry throat making his voice husky, Kaidan asks her, “Why do you keep this a secret?” 

“Remember our talk about enemies and how news like this would be something they could hurt my family with?”

Kaidan nods, “I remember. Why tell me about your situation, then?”

“I trust you. I only confide my secrets to those I trust.” Reza squeezes his hand again. “Plus, you deserved to hear the truth. And…and I didn’t want to hurt you. Though, obviously I’ve failed at that.”

Waving aside that he was hurting, which he clearly was, his chest warms a little at knowing that he means so much to her. He may never be able to call her his, intimately, but he’s in her confidence. That by itself is a great honor. Holding onto the lifeline of friendship as tight as he can, he whispers, his voice still raw from the emotion of the situation. “Thank you for telling me.” 

“I technically didn’t tell you. You guessed,” Reza smirks at him, trying to lighten the mood. 

Kaidan smiles briefly at her in return. “Be that as it may…I appreciate your honesty with me.”

“Of course. That’s what friends are for,” she replies, relieved to see that they will continue to be the best of friends. 

{{{}}}

After that, they walk back to the Normandy together, talking about the little things. Reza wanted to inform Joker of what actually happened in the council chambers and Kaidan wanted to continue just having a chance to get to know his ‘friend’ on a more personal basis. Not having anything else to do, he follows her back. Once they cycle through the decon chamber, they pause briefly at the entrance to the bridge to watch Joker humming to himself as he watches a vid on his monitors, still in uniform. 

“What happened to agreeing to take shore leave, Joker?” Reza asks loudly, making him jerk in his chair and pause his vid, before turning around to face her, an impish look on his face.

“Eh…whaddya gonna do, punish me?” Joker smirks and waggles his brows.

“You wish,” Reza grins at her snarky husband. 

Joker snickers and then stiffens when he sees Kaidan standing behind her. He relaxes a little after seeing the man’s expression. “Oh…you told him. That’s what you were hinting at.”

“I didn’t technically tell him…he guessed.”

“Huh…so, Alenko…got anything to say to me?”

“Nope. You win. Regarding our bet? I concede, as you clearly have the upper hand.”

Reza looks at the two of them and asks her voice slightly dangerous, “What bet?”

Ignoring his wife for the time being, Joker grins. “Yeah. You mad?”

Kaidan shakes his head and walks over to him to hold out his hand. “Nah…you had your reasons.” After Joker shakes his hand, he grins at him in return and looks at Reza still standing behind them in her famous stance, clearly annoyed at not being in on what they were talking about. “I just got to say…you are one lucky bastard.”

“I know.”

Reza huffs in annoyance and looks up at the ceiling and mumbles something like, ‘Men…such idiots,’ before storming off down the gangplank into the CIC; leaving the two of them laughing behind her. 

{{{}}}

“So, Kaidan told me that you almost killed Udina after the council meeting adjourned. Trouble?”

“Of course. When am I ever not in trouble?”

“True.” Reza sticks her tongue out at him and he laughs. “Which is what I love about you, babe. It gives me a chance to ride in on my shiny new space-ship and save your luscious ass.”

“Poetic.”

“I try.”

Reza laughs and blows him a kiss from her position in the co-pilot’s chair. She had joined him in the bridge after doing some paperwork, to catch him up on the latest news. He hadn’t had the permission to view their suit cam footage during their meetings earlier in the day. Apparently, the consulate and council chambers were off limits to unsanctioned viewing devices. Shocker. 

“Yeah…it was the way he was talking to David. I didn’t like his tone.”

Joker scoffs and turns his chair towards her, “What else is new. He’s an asshole and thinks he can lord it over the Alliance that he has veto power should it have a direct connection to his dealings with the council.”

“That is exactly what happened and why I got so pissed…”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. Unfortunately, David had a pissing match with Saren over what happened to their combined mission, twenty years ago.”

“Shit.” Joker was another person privy to what happened between Saren and Anderson. 

“Yep.” 

“So…what now?”

Reza declares, “Now, I wait until I hear from my friend, Garrus, to get back to me on something he’s checking up on.”

Joker frowns, remembering the name from their many discussions about the details to Rez’s missions that she could tell him. “Garrus? That Turian C-Sec officer you told me about? The one you met during your investigation into that scumbag warlord you offed with Nihlus…what was it, six months ago?”

“Yeah, that’s him. He was the officer put in charge of the investigation into Saren.”

Joker scoffs. “Apparently, he didn’t do a very good job.”

Reza frowns at him, “He didn’t have much time, Joker. It wasn’t his fault we’re in the predicament we're in now. As Saren is a Spectre, any of his records are classified.” 

“Didn’t I say Spectre’s are trouble?”

“Yes, you did.” 

“Speaking of which, what about your Spectre candidacy?”

Reza makes a face, “That was put on hold for the time being.”

“They didn’t take that away from you?”

“No. Not yet. Though, that’s probably going to happen, especially if the Turian counselor has anything to say about it.” 

“Not a fan?”

“That's the understatement of the decade and a story for another time. Every time I think about it, it pisses me off. I’d rather think happy thoughts.” 

Joker smirks at her and looks her up and down, “Anything I can do to help you with that?”

Reza laughs, knowing exactly what he is offering. Switching gears, she heads him off. “Yeah…you can join me for dinner.”

Joker blinks at her, “What? Where did that come from? I thought we were both going to blow off this Popsicle stand and defy orders, as usual.”

Rolling her eyes, Reza explains, “David’s idea. Plus, my parents are arriving tonight and have invited us to dinner at their apartment. It’s pasta night.” 

Joker looks at her, wide-eyed. “Did you know they were coming to visit?”

“Nope. Dad said something akin to a visit when I last spoke to him on Arcturus, but not a word since. I guess my mom’s tour ended early and she’s awaiting new orders. They wanted to see me after the beacon incident.”

“Yaaaay…” Joker snarks and then starts to cough and pet his throat. “I’m sick, feeling poorly, and I’m probably contagious. Actually, I have to spend the night in med-bay. Give my regrets?”

“Funny…if I have to go, you have to go.”

“Fine.” He mocks a gag, until she frowns at him. “Well, I do like pasta.”

Reza huffs at his ability to see the positive side to things. “Silver lining, huh?”

“Always.” 

{{{}}}

As they’re getting ready for their impromptu dinner plans, Reza had just finished pinning her hair up in the coif she uses when wearing her dress uniform, the standard attire to meet up with her parents, when she’s pinged by Garrus. Quickly, she strips off her towel and naked, she explains to her leering husband the situation, as she finds something else to wear. “Well, it looks like you got your wish. Apparently, Garrus has found something that he thinks may help our investigation and could use backup. I’m to meet up with him as soon as possible in the Wards near a med clinic. Mission takes precedence over dinner with the parents.”

Joker tears his eyes away from his wife’s ass to cheer and sits on their bed. Unbuttoning the top few buttons of his coat, he sighs in pleasure. “Awesomesauce! Now I can take off this monkey suit. I really wasn’t looking forward to the incessant questioning of your actions by your mother and how it doesn’t befit a Shepard to wear your hair the way you do. What’s up with that? I love your hair.”

“She’s not that bad.”

Joker stares at her, his duh face on, making her fidget. “Seriously? She’s that bad. At least you can stand being in the same room as your mother,” he huffs and lies back on their bed, “Can’t say the same for mine.”

“Sorry babe. I forgot how awkward our estrangement has been on you and my Dad. Mostly, I just wanted to see him anyway. It’s been awhile since I saw him in person. QEC isn’t quite the same.”

Joker grunts in agreement. “Can we just adopt Chakwas as our mother?”

“Gross. That would make us brother and sister.”

“Oh…right. Incest bad. Can you adopt her and I can just honorably mention her?”

Reza giggles and sits next to him, so she can look down at him, half dressed in a bra and her uniform trousers, holding her shirt. “I’m sure she’d like that. I already think of her as a second mother.”

“What your father sees in Hannah, I have no idea.”

“Honestly…me either. She hasn’t always been so rigid. She only started to act that way after I joined the Alliance and took her name.”

Joker raises his hand to brush along her cheek, grinning at her when she turns her head to kiss his palm. Trailing his hand downward, he looks hotly at her as he brushes against one of her nipples, making her gasp. “When did you say that you had to meet up with Garrus?”

Trapping his hand with hers, she leans over him to kiss him. Before it becomes hot and heavy, she pulls away and stands up, pulling on her uniform top. “Sorry babe, but I’ve got to go. I’m going to grab Alenko and book it to HQ to change into my armor.” Grabbing her boots, she smiles smugly when she notices that her husband is trying unsuccessfully to hide how much her unintended strip tease had affected him. Finishing with her boots, she arms herself, slipping a few concealed knives into her boot and cargo pockets. Thinking quickly, she looks at her husband and asks him, her voice sugar sweet. “Can you do me a favor?”

Joker shakes his head having sat up to adjust himself. She only uses that tone when she wants something. “Nope. Uh uh. I’m not going to let you sweet talk me into contacting your parents for you, about having to reschedule dinner. You can do it on your way to HQ.”

Reza sticks her lower lip out and pouts, “Pretty please?”

Joker throws his arms out in an ‘I give up pose,’ “Ugh…fine. But, you owe me for this.”

Reza smirks and looks him up and down, pausing at a particular body part, licking her lips.

“Yeah that…that’s what I want in exchange,” Joker holds out his hand to seal the deal. 

Smiling as though she’s just eaten the canary, Reza shakes his hand. “Deal.”

{{{}}}

Joker laughs as she waves at him and leaves their room; contacting Alenko along the way out to the command deck. Sighing in resignation, he brings up his omni-tool and types out an email to his parents-in-law about having to cancel their plans. 

The shit he has to deal with…geez. 

Grinning wickedly, he hurriedly strips off his dress uniform for something much more comfortable to watch the suit cam footage and whistles as he slowly makes his way back up to the bridge and his chair. Hoping that whatever it is that Reza is doing to be over with already, he looks forward to their deal coming to fruition once she returns. 

Oh, the hardship. 

{{{}}}


	15. Revelations - Part Deux

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thanks for the kudos and comments. This chapter is rated 'M' for language and combat. 
> 
> Happy N7 Day!

{{{}}}

Well, they’ve officially recruited another Turian to join their cause. It seems as though Garrus had been hankering for a reason to quit C-Sec anyway, since it was quickly becoming a political shit-storm and red tape was running the organization, making him jaded to the plight of the people he was trying to protect. What was worse was the lines between good and evil were blurring. What better way to say fuck you, than to join their wayward band of dedicated souls on the state of the art Normandy. They definitely had room for another Turian, seeing as though they were one short at the moment. The medical clinic shoot out that occurred after Shepard had joined Garrus on his quest to take down Saren went pretty well actually. They had been able to ferret out another lead to take that asshole down. 

It seems that a Quarian was in town and had requested sanctuary from an agent of the shadow broker; someone she thought would be able to protect her from Saren’s agents who were tracking her down. Unfortunately, Saren had a longer arm than they thought. This ‘agent’ for the shadow broker was now playing for both sides. Although, Reza hadn’t had any dealings with the illustrious information broker, yet, the fact that a trusted agent would defect on account of greed, pissed her off enough to not just track the bastard down to save the Quarian, but do the Citadel a favor and get rid of the asshole. However, based on Garrus’ intel, they had one more stop to make before confronting this double agent, called Fist. They had a Krogan to find, a bounty hunter, hired by the shadow broker, to take the traitor out. She figured what the hell…they may as well partner up. Besides, she'd be stupid to say no to Krogan back-up. 

After taking the shuttle bus to C-Sec headquarters, Reza follows the sound of men shouting, knowing that most likely the person she is here to find is the cause of such rancor. Krogans were known for their stubborn refusal to follow law enforcement’s demands. Walking around the corner of the main elevator, she stops to grin at the scene in front of her. The C-Sec officers assigned to watch over the grizzled old mercenary were in a heated debate with the guy. 

Shaking her head, Reza waits for the Krogan to notice her. C-Sec should just give it up. There was no chance in hell they could ever corral the guy into behaving himself. She should know. She’s tried several times in the past to reason with this particular Krogan. After several failed attempts, she just gave up and joined in; and ultimately had a blast. Using her ‘I’m a badass’ pose, Reza waits to see if the huge red armored Krogan at the center of the ruckus shuts up long enough to notice he has an audience. 

{{{}}} 

Sniffing the air as a light scent of coconuts wafts towards him, Urdnot Wrex scans the room and focuses on a black armored human female with a N7 logo, black hair, and lavender eyes looking haughtily back at him. Narrowing his eyes at her, he growls at seeing that the human female isn’t alone. She has a human male also armored and a tall male Turian hovering behind her. Baring his teeth at the Turian who clicks his mandibles in response to the slight, he ignores the protesting security personnel trying to get his attention and lumbers over to the female and gets into her face, making her companions automatically come to attention, ready to defend her. Hunching over to look her in the eye, he growls at her, baring his teeth. 

Knowing that the growling Krogan is challenging her, Reza stays put and glares right back at him. She knows this dance. She is not cowed by such a Krogan as he. 

Huffing that he recognizes that she is a worthy opponent, Wrex takes a step back and bows in respect. 

Never taking her eyes off of the Krogan in front of her, she bows in response, familiar with this ritual. Then she grins and winks at him.

“HA!” Wrex exclaims loudly and grabs Reza around the waist and twirls her around in a circle crushing her to him. Her companions, although uncomfortable, relax slightly and look on at them confused as to their antics.

“Put me down, you big lummox. You’re going to crack a rib again.” Reza exclaims as she laughs in delight at seeing her friend once more. She was hoping that the Krogan, Garrus had described, was Wrex. It had been ages since she saw him last, but never forgotten. He was that memorable. 

Wrex puts his old friend down and looks her over as he grabs her shoulders to steady her from his boisterous welcome. “Battlemaster Shepard, it’s so good to see you again.”

“As it is you, Battlemaster Wrex,” Reza wheezes as she catches her breath after he squeezed her so tightly.

“You look as good as ever, my friend. Better than the last time, actually,” Wrex grunts as he turns her around to look at her ass. “Mmm, still squishy but that is what I like about you,” he says as his hand dips from her shoulder to run down along the outside of her ass and squeezes one of her cheeks. 

Before Reza can respond in kind to Wrex’s unwelcome attentions, having had this same 'conversation' with him before, Kaidan lights up with biotic energy and sneers, “Let her go, now, before I put you down, Krogan.”

Extricating herself from Wrex’s grabby hands, Reza steps between them and puts her hands out when Wrex also lights up and growls low at Kaidan for daring to threaten him. Looking at her Lt, Reza says in a low voice, “Stand down, Lt. I can handle it from here.”

Kaidan releases his energy and nods his head in acknowledgement and stands off to the side with Garrus, who is quietly watching.

“Wrex, I warned you the last time you tried to take liberties with me. I won’t warn you again.”

He starts laughing and releases his energy. “I was only teasing you, Shepard. I wanted to see if you had changed your mind, that’s all.”

Crossing her arms over her chest, Reza narrows her eyes at the chuckling Krogan, who thinks he’s finally gotten one over on her. “Uh huh.” 

“I’m glad to see that you have a squad mate with a quad, Shepard. Not just anyone would threaten a Krogan Battlemaster. I’m impressed.”

“What…you expect me to not have the best at my side, Wrex?”

“It only shows the kind of leader you are…always expecting the best out of your people. I can respect that. I guess that also means the Turian is also one of the best.”

“You know it.”

“Hmm…” Wrex grunts as he contemplates her answer. 

Having the chance to retaliate for getting groped with Wrex’s attention focused elsewhere rather than on her, she grabs his arm and using his own weight against him, pulls him forward with enough momentum to make him flip in mid-air and fall onto his back. With a loud ‘Ooomph’ Wrex stares up at the ceiling and blinks his red eyes at her when she leans over him. “As I said, you won’t get another warning, Wrex. I don’t just let anyone touch me. Remember that…”

With a loud bellowing laugh, Wrex grins up at her and sits up. “You are quite the fiery female. I always knew you were part Krogan.”

“Yes, well…thanks for the compliment,” Reza grins as she helps pull him up to stand on his feet. Looking around, she finally notices that they have quite the audience. “Let’s take this reunion of ours elsewhere, yes?” 

“What can I do for you, Shepard? I’m always willing to join in on one of your many adventures. That is how we met, is it not?” Wrex asks as he starts following her to the skycab stand, her two squad mates trailing behind. 

“True. Let’s get back to business, then. I’m going after Fist. I believe that you also have a beef with him. I thought we could team up.”

“Hmm…as long as I get to kill him,” Wrex gruffs out as he nods at her.

Reza shrugs. “Okay with me…saves me from wasting a bullet on him.”

“Ha!” Wrex laughs as a skycab lands at the stand once Reza summons one. He then extends an armored hand outward towards the vehicle, “Lead on then, Commander, let’s get this done.”

“Roger that.”

{{{}}}

“Uh…Commander, according to my visor, we have lots of company waiting for us inside.” Garrus informs her as they make their way from the skycab stand to the bar where Fist holds court; Chora’s Den. 

“Awesome…” Reza mumbles as she stops and turns around on the walkway leading up to the entrance, to look at her squad mates. Looking between Kaidan, Garrus, and Wrex, she grins, “I guess I brought the right squad with me, then.”

Wrex starts laughing and punches his fist into his open hand, which is a very Krogan gesture, and then nudges Garrus next to him, making the tall Turian lurch forward. “I’m not sure your Turian friend here can keep up with us. He doesn’t even have the latest rifle. Now mine is…”

“Ugh…” Reza mumbles to herself and walks further ahead to wait for the two idiots arguing, to finish measuring their ‘equipment.’ 

Kaidan follows and looks back at them as he waits for his Commander to give the order of attack. It seems as though Fist knew that they were coming for him. “Do you know everyone, Commander?”

Looking at him and seeing him watch Garrus and Wrex argue over who has the better mod for their rifles, Reza grins fondly at her two friends. “Only those that matter.”

Kaidan grunts and looks down.

Reza lays her hand on his shoulder which makes him look up at her, “That includes you, Kaidan. You’ve proven to me that you matter. Don’t forget that.”

Even though his heart is still aching over their talk about her marital status earlier in the wards, which he will never reveal to her as devastating to him, Kaidan smiles at her compliment. “Thanks.”

“Speaking of which, I wanted to thank you for coming to my aid earlier with Wrex. He’s quite the scamp, that one, and would never hurt me. I did appreciate you defending my honor, though.”

Kaidan blinks and blushes at her comment and sputters, “Your welcome…I…I was worried that you were offended…that I thought you couldn’t handle it…that I was besmirching your training…” He stops when Reza laughs and squeezes his arm.

“Whoa…I didn’t think that at all. I know you were reacting to his advances on your superior officer and friend. I never once thought that you didn’t think I couldn’t handle the situation.”

Rubbing the back of his neck in consternation over their conversation, Kaidan blushes again and nods at her. Calming down, he asks, “So, Commander, how do want to do this,” he says pointing at the club. 

Realizing that they came out here for a reason, to ultimately find the Quarian, through the contact of Fist, Reza turns back towards the squabbling pair in the corner and walks towards them, raising her voice to catch their attentions. “Now that you’ve determined who has the bigger dick, let’s get this party started. Alright?”

Wrex laughs uproariously at her comment and Garrus looks away grumbling, his mandibles clicking in annoyance at being caught arguing with a stubborn Krogan over something so idiotic when they clearly had work to do.

Apparently, Wrex had no shame and smirks at Reza as he looks her up and down again. “I have told you that you don’t know what you're missing. I’ve lived a long time, Shepard, I know how to please a female.”

“Tempting as that is, I’m already mated. You know this. You’ve met him.”

“Ha! That puny pyjak can’t even walk straight or watch your six.”

Pulling out a knife, Reza walks straight up to the grinning Krogan and puts the tip up to his scarred throat. “Watch what you say about my husband, Kraglat. He might not have the physical strength of a Krogan,” Reza grits out as she glares at him, which makes him grin and purr at her in return, “But he pilots a state of the art warship that will stick a canon so far up your ass that you will be shitting bulkheads for a week.”

“And then some…” Joker sneers through the squad comm link, finally joining the party.

“Ha! Joker, you are one lucky bastard to have such a fiery female as Shepard,” Wrex says as he backs up away from the knife and sticks his hands up in the air, surrendering with a shit eating grin on his face. 

“And don’t you forget it!” 

{{{}}}

“What does Kraglat mean,” Kaidan asks Garrus as Wrex and Reza talk to Fist. “My translator said the word didn’t translate well.”

Garrus looks at the pale human and chuckles, “Kraglat is the Krogan word for bastard, but with more aggressive undertones.”

“Huh…I take it that it was more of an insult then.”

“You can say that…it’s obvious though that Wrex doesn’t mind, he was baiting her all this time to just rile her up anyway. Although, I think to him, it was more foreplay than anything…” Garrus says as he looks at the large Krogan. His stance is one of protection next to the Commander who is interrogating their quarry. Wrex obviously cares deeply for the Commander. 

“Foreplay…” Kaidan blanches and looks at Reza and blushes, and then he quickly tries to hide his reaction by turning around to watch their perimeter.

Catching Alenko's facial expression and obvious interest in the Commander, Garrus huffs out an amused chuckle in his subharmonics when he realizes the Lt is head over heels in love with Shepard. Get in line, human. It seems Shepard has quite the fan club of besotted fools, him included. There was just something about the human Lt. Commander Rezana Shepard that got his predatory instincts aroused and he’s been sniffing after her since they met, much to the delight of his ex-partner Chelick. He always said that the Commander was going to be Garrus’ downfall. Her scent was delicious and he always had to catch himself from scenting her in return. Other than the fact that she would kick his ass for doing so, the fact that she was already bonded was why he’s never said anything. Returning to the conversation, Garrus snorts, “I’m glad that I’m not the only one to have fallen for our mutual friend, Lieutenant. If it makes you feel better, what is it you humans say, I’m in the same boat as you.”

Kaidan looks at the tall blue-painted Turian who is looking at him seriously and nods, “How long have you known the Commander?”

“Hmm…about six months now. My ex-partner and I worked a case with her and Spectre Nihlus when they were here on a mission. Let’s just say it was extremely memorable…I’ll tell you about it sometime.” Kaidan chuckles in response to his barb about their experience with the Commander, obviously believing anything was possible with her involvement. With Kaidan’s focus on him, he misses the brief slide of Shepard’s eyes to look at him when he laughs, her pupils dilating slightly, before giving her attention back to the conversation between Fist and Wrex. Hmm…interesting, it seems the Lt. has made quite the impression on Shepard, too. As a C-Sec detective, he’s trained to catch all type of mannerisms and according to Reza’s increased pulse point, the Lt definitely had her attention in more ways than either of them thought. Smirking a little, he’s looking forward to whatever comes next in this adventure he’s now a part of. He’ll follow her to ends of the galaxy and back. It seems the Lt is along for the ride, as well. 

A large shotgun blast echoes into the room, interrupting him from his thoughts. Garrus immediately sees that the Commander has put up a barrier to guard away from the backlash, which is a splash of human brains and gore. After she checks to make sure none of it has landed on her, Reza glares up at a sheepish Wrex.

Garrus rushes forward to see if the Commander is alright and yells at the big Krogan, “What the hell are you doing?”

Wrex growls at Garrus and then responds, “I never leave a job unfinished. I told you earlier that I was going to kill him.”

“You could have hurt the Commander. You need to watch yourself!” Garrus yells at Wrex in retaliation to his threatening demeanor and steps in front of Reza, an instinctual reaction to protect her. 

Laying her hand on his shoulder to diffuse his temper, Reza steps around Garrus and responds to Wrex’ vehement declaration, “And I agreed with you. A little warning next time, Wrex, that’s all I ask. If not for my barrier, you would be the one cleaning my armor. Do you know how hard it is to get brain matter out of my seams? Ick!”

Wrex, Garrus, and Kaidan all look at the Commander in surprise as she looks down at her beloved N7 black armor that fits her like a glove. Then they all begin to laugh at the idea that she wasn’t upset over the loss of Fist, but the cleanliness of her armor…and that, yes, they do know how hard it is to get brain matter out of said armor.

Looking at her laughing squad mates, Reza rolls her eyes and clenches her jaw, as she also realizes that in fact they do know and that they are laughing at her in general, for technically being ‘a girl’ about it. Flipping them off, which makes them laugh at her louder; she turns around and flounces back into the atrium of Fist’s office. “Come on, idiots, let’s go save the Quarian. We have 10 minutes until she is supposed to meet up with Saren’s agents. Let’s get there before then.”

Admiring the view of their armor clad Commander, toting her weapons and a badass attitude, her three male squad mates follow her, their eyes latching on to a particular part of her anatomy as she walks away to lead them back into the fray. Their moods lighten as they head off to another inevitable fire fight before meeting up with the Quarian who may have all the answers to all their questions. 

{{{}}}

“Tali’Zorah nar Raaya, it is nice to meet you,” Reza says bowing respectfully with her hands overlapping under her chin, a gesture of respect from one traveler to another.

“And I you…Lt. Commander Shepard,” Tali says mimicking the gesture. 

“You can call me Shepard or Commander, Tali’Zorah.”

“And you may call me Tali, for short. You are very well versed on Quarian customs, Commander,” Tali observes as she walks abreast of the Commander as they make their way out into the markets towards the nearest skycab stand, to take them to the embassies. She’s a little awed at the female walking next to her. Thank goodness this human and her odd band of squad mates were waiting for her. If not for them, she would have been taken to Saren or worse… killed. 

“I knew a Quarian refugee a while back and he taught me your people’s customs.”

“Oh? I haven’t heard of many Quarians that are not with the flotilla. Do I know him?”

“I’m afraid that my friend left the flotilla long before you were born, Tali. He never returned after his pilgrimage.”

“Ah, I see. I have heard of a few Quarians who never returned. I always believed that they had died.”

“No. In fact, Toran’Torali, that was his name, had fallen in love with a human, Maggie, on Elysium and lived a long and happy life. Unfortunately, due to a prolonged illness after the Blitz, he has since past on.”

Gasping, Tali touches a hand to her breast over her heart, a sign of mourning, and reverently exclaims, “I’m sorry for your loss, Shepard.”

“Thank you. He will be missed. Toran was a good friend during a hard time in my life; he and his wife, both. I still keep in contact with her.”

“Keelah’selai, Shepard.”

“Keelah’selai.”

{{{}}} 

Meeting up with Captain Anderson and Ambassador Udina back in the human embassy offices, Reza watches as her new friend, Tali; explains her findings on who was behind the Geth attack on Eden Prime. It seems that Saren was the bastard they all thought he was. Shocker. There was even mention that the ‘Reapers’ she remembered from her dream; while felled from the Prothean beacon, where real or at least where real enough to be a warning of bigger foe on the horizon. Either way, it seemed prudent to stay vigilant of any new information that referenced them. 

Although the Ambassador seemed skeptical at first of believing in this small thread of doom and gloom, at the present, he seemed to agree with her and the Captain. Any evidence or information regarding these boogie-men was to be investigated and brought forward for further analysis. As far as Reza was concerned, she didn’t need approval to keep digging for more concrete evidence, just so her vision never came to fruition. 

Within an hour, they found themselves back in the Citadel Tower, briefing the Council on the hard evidence they were able to find on Saren and take him down, or at least strip him of his Spectre status. This would hurt him as he was cut off from resources and put a bounty on his head in Council space. This time, it seemed that Saren wasn’t going to grace them with his presence. Another shocker. 

Then the matter of who would be dispatched to take out the rogue Spectre came up. This was when Reza’s possible promotion to Spectre reared its ugly head again…and where professional decorum took a turn for the worst between their Ambassador and the Turian Councilor. Udina may not have been Reza’s biggest fan, but he was on board in making her the first human Spectre and went to bat for her when Sparatus started spewing trash about humans. 

It seemed having a human as a Spectre was putting a nasty taste in Councilor Sparatus’ mouth. He was extremely vocal about not wanting the humans to have this honor. After several rounds of bitter arguing between the three Councilors and Ambassador Udina, it seemed that the bigger dilemma of hunting down Saren, the traitor, became the catalyst to Reza receiving the promotion to Spectre. Whatever happened in their search for him would determine either way if the first human Spectre was up to snuff or not. What really came down to it was the Turian Counselor was overruled. In the end he gave his stamp of approval to her promotion; glaring at her the whole time when they were authorizing it. All that was left was the official ceremony. 

In normal respects you would think they would get the promotion ceremony over with, so Reza and company could be on their way, but not this time. It seemed that Udina wanted to use her promotion to his benefit. Big shocker. This was the event of the decade, or at least that was the tagline he was spewing to all his cronies and big-wigs in his circle of dignitaries that he was inviting to the ceremony. 

It seems pomp and circumstance overruled justice for the lives lost at Eden Prime and the destruction of the beacon. 

{{{}}}

After being told to wait in an antechamber, Reza and Kaidan sat around twiddling their thumbs as they awaited orders. Their new squad mates; Wrex, Garrus, and Tali, joined them, each not knowing if they were to accompany them on their mission to search for the rogue Spectre or go their own way. 

“So Shepard...will I be able to accompany you on your mission? You saw that I can hold my own in a firefight. I’m pretty handy with a shotgun, too.” Tali asks hesitantly as she catches Reza’s attention as she paces from one end of the room to the other, in her agitation in having to wait for news on her Spectre status. 

Reza stops in front of her, “What about your pilgrimage? I wouldn’t ask for you to join me if it interfered with your journey.”

Wringing her hands, Tali hurriedly explains her request. “During my travels I began hearing reports of the Geth. Since they drove my people into exile, the Geth have never ventured beyond the Veil…until now. This made me curious. Why now would they come out of hiding? So, I went looking for them and eventually procured the evidence you needed to take Saren down.”

“Yes, I do owe you for that,” Reza nods in acknowledgement. 

“The Geth are my specialty, Commander. Let me come with you…whatever you decide to do. As a Spectre, you have the ability to recruit any squad mates you need to successfully complete your mission. I’m also really good at engineering…”

Reza chuckles and holds out her hand, interrupting Tali on trying to sell herself. “Welcome aboard, Tali. I’m always looking for those willing to help.”

“Thank you, Commander,” Tali nods her head in thanks.

“That goes for you two, Wrex…Garrus. If you want to join up, we would be happy to have you join our cause.”

“You already know that I’m with you, Shepard,” Garrus exclaims, standing up.

“I’m in. This is going to be fun.” Wrex grins.

Reza grins back at them and is interrupted from responding by Captain Anderson coming into the room. Turning around to face him, she and Kaidan come to attention, waiting for him to talk about what is to happen next.

{{{}}}

“There’s to be a ceremony, at noon tomorrow. The official ceremony will commence here in the Council chambers. Afterwards, Ambassador Udina is hosting a party to celebrate the ‘First Human Spectre.’ So dress accordingly, Shepard. Everyone who is anyone will be there.” Anderson pauses to laugh as he sees his goddaughter roll her eyes. “The Alliance will be there as well. Your father and Admiral Kohoku will be representing, seeing as they are the only brass present at the moment.”

Reza smiles, she knows Admiral Kohoku. He was at her N7 graduation, recruiting members for his special ops teams. If not for her father and the Captain whisking her away to gallivant across the stars with them, she may have taken him up on his offer. His reputation as a good leader made his offer very tempting, at the time. 

“By the way, Admiral Kohoku wants to see you, when you have a moment. Something about a missing squad in the Traverse,” Anderson adds, continuing his brief.

Reza nods.

“Before the ceremony, meet me at the conference hall in Alliance HQ. I’m not at liberty to explain at this time regarding why the brass is asking for you to meet with them, but suffice it to say, that wearing dress blues would be a good idea.”

Reza frowns at him and nods when he doesn’t give any indication as to why the Alliance was getting involved in a Council promotion. Although, if she thought about it, it kind of made sense; one of their officers was going to be loaned out to the Council as one of their elite operatives, permanently. Maybe the Alliance wanted to put their ore in…so to speak, reminding her she was an officer in the Alliance, first, then a Council Spectre. Ugh…politics. 

The numerous hats she was wearing were going to overlap. It was inevitable. Only, it was up to her to figure out how to wrangle them without making waves on both fronts. So, this meeting tomorrow before the promotion ceremony was probably just that, a last ditch effort to make sure she remembers what color her blood runs. 

Plus, there was the matter of requesting a transfer off the Normandy…shit. She didn’t think of that. Joker was going to be pissed. 

Wait a second…didn’t Spectres get privileges? Maybe she could request his transfer to whatever ship the Council loaned her to go after Saren in. She would need the best pilot in the Alliance, wouldn’t she? Reza grins after the Captain dismissed them until the ceremony tomorrow. Maybe this promotion to Spectre won’t be so bad after all. Apparently, her crew compliment included this amazing squad, Kaidan included. Add in a pilot…and a Mako…yep, she’s ready. 

Now if only she can get through the stupid party the Ambassador has in store for her. Shit. 

{{{}}}


	16. PR Stunt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thanks for all your kudos and comments. The following chapter is rated 'M' for language.

“Absolutely not!”

“Reza…” Captain Anderson warns as he watches her pace across the Normandy mess. He had just briefed her on a request from their Ambassador, for that evening’s celebration party on her new role as ‘First Human Spectre.’ It seems that Udina wants a vid of her singing in the background for all to see. It was a puff piece and David knew within seconds what her reaction would be, once he told her. Yep. He called it. Not only did she explode and vehemently refuse the ‘request’ but it had effectively ruined the comradery that she had been enjoying with her husband, Kaidan, Ashley, and Doc Chakwas; while having breakfast with their new crew member, Tali. 

Wincing, David sighs, when Reza mumbles to herself, gesticulation wildly, as she makes another circuit around the mess, about insipid Ambassadors and where he can take his suggestions and shove it… 

Stopping in front of her godfather, Reza exclaims loudly, “I will NOT be paraded around like a puppet for Udina’s amusement!”

“Reza…as a Spectre, you are now a symbol for the human race. It seems that Udina has shown his true colors for backing you yesterday and is now going to use your status to his benefit. I propose that we not only do the vid, but do the opposite and use it for ours instead.”

Reza glowers at him and clenches her teeth. “How?” 

“We turn it into a PR event and use it to help increase recruitment for the Alliance or something along that line, if it makes you feel better. After Eden Prime, the Alliance has taken a big hit on new recruits.”

“So, instead of being used by Udina to further his ambitions, now I’m being used by the Alliance? I know we took a big hit from Eden Prime, however, I don’t like being used by either of you,” Reza fumes at him and starts to pace again. Glaring, she adds, “I’m not feeling better about this.” Fuck! Not the recruitment bomb…again. 

“Now you’re just being stubborn,” David exclaims and rubs his hands over his face, sighing. “I’m sorry, Reza. I’m being pulled in two different directions here and Udina won’t let up on how important this is to him,” he adds by way of apology. “Now, the Alliance brass is putting pressure on me to convince you to do this recruitment ad. And, I can’t order you to do this…you have to volunteer.” David rolls his eyes, “Although, it seems that Udina thinks he can order you around now that you’re a Spectre and answer to the Council. No matter how much he may want to, he doesn’t have the authority to make demands of you. Only the Council does. You technically don’t even answer to me anymore. Although as an Alliance officer, it would be to your best interest to comply.” 

So, to sum it all up, she’s damned either way. Crap. Reza grits her teeth and turns away to glare at the floor as she tries to calm down. She does NOT like being used. However, instead of railing at him, she concedes that he may have a point. Still angry, she walks up to him and holds out her hand for the datapad; which outlines the vid information. She may as well know what type of bullshit their asshole Ambassador is asking for. After reviewing the suggestions that any self-respecting soldier in the Alliance with her battle history wouldn’t be caught dead in; she huffs and throws it on the table, shaking her head in denial, and resumes pacing. 

Eh, it was worth a shot. Appealing to her sense of honor, David tries another tactic. “Reza…we need this. Us. Humans. The Alliance. I happen to agree that a vid featuring the ‘First Human Spectre,’ an N7 elite soldier, savior of Terra Nova, and Hero of the Blitz, is a draw for anyone thinking about joining the Alliance. Remember the posters that circulated after you received the Star of Terra? Our recruitment numbers sky-rocketed. We need that again. If hunting down Saren turns out to be the shit-storm you believe it’s going to be, we need all the help we can get.”

Reza stops her pacing to think about this strategically, because he’s speaking her language. He knows her too well, damn it. They are going to need all the help they can get, especially if the Reapers are involved. They’re going to need all hands on deck, and not just the humans, but every race in the galaxy. Still miffed for being used, she tries one last ditch effort to show her ire at the situation. Huffing loudly in frustration, she blusters, “I’m not a sex symbol!” Pausing to glare at her husband as he snickers and winks at her, she adds, “I don’t need comments from the peanut gallery!”

Pulling out all the guns, David sighs and catches Joker’s eye and motions for him to help out. If anyone can get Reza to cooperate, it’s her husband. So, after giving him a pleading look, he smiles when Joker glares at him and then gives an ‘I give up’ pose before nodding quickly. 

Breathing easier, David sends notice to the studio to prepare for their arrival and replies to Udina, as well. During their conversation, Udina had sent an ultimatum to have his protégé at the studio, regardless of her cooperation or not. Plus, her father was also on board and had given him an order to get it done. It’s not often when Steven orders him to do anything, but in this situation, as her Captain, it came down to him to do the convincing. 

Meanwhile, after reviewing the list of optional dress code and songs the Ambassador has approved for the vid, Joker stands up and interrupts his wife’s pacing by grabbing her hand and pulling her up to him, wrapping an arm around her. “Babe, I agree that most of these ‘suggestions’ for the vid are ridiculous. Also, I will enjoy watching you finally give in to your desire to make an Udina sized hole in the wall for even suggesting that you do this in your underwear. Although, to be honest, if you want to do that one as a personal vid to me, I wouldn’t be opposed to it…just saying.” He smiles lasciviously and waggles his eyebrows at her, making her roll her eyes and huff in response, a grin peeking out. 

Karin laughs and David groans and coughs to get them back on topic. 

They are interrupted, however, by a shocked gasp and a very Quarian giggle. Reza and Joker, both, turn to see that Ashley is gaping at them in shock and Tali is leaning on her elbows, obviously enjoying the show. Kaidan is looking a little uncomfortable, but is grinning nonetheless. 

“Um…” Joker reddens and looks back at his wife; apologetic for forgetting that not all of their friends know about their relationship. 

Reza rolls her eyes and points to him and then to her chest, before explaining their status to their audience. Oh well…Ashley’s reliable. “We’re married.”

“And…” Tali says, expecting more from her. 

Reza tilts her head and asks, curious, “You knew?” 

Ashley gasps again and looks at the Quarian. Actually, they all turn to look at her. 

Ducking her helmeted head in embarrassment, not used to receiving so much attention, Tali nods. “It’s obvious. I knew as soon as I saw you two together.” After looking around at the rest of them, seeing Kaidan and Ashley’s varied facial expressions, she explains. “Living your life inside a suit and helmet makes one pick up on the little things; like facial expressions and gestures. For example, I know that the Captain and Doctor already knew about your relationship and have probably known for a long time.” Tilting her head to the side as she looks at the two in question, she adds, “They also have a special connection to you…I’m thinking they are akin to family.” Looking directly at Kaidan, she points at him, “As far as the Lt is concerned, I detect that he is uncomfortable with the news, but is not surprised. So, either he just found out or is jealous of the connection. The gunnery chief on the other hand, didn’t know.” 

“Hmm,” Doctor Chakwas pipes in before anyone else can comment, “Those are very astute observations, Tali. I would like to speak with you further about your unique talent, if you have time.”

“Of course, Doctor,” Tali agrees, “I would be pleased to speak with you.”

Before Karin can continue their conversation, Reza interjects to get them back on topic. “Later. Very good, Tali. Now I don’t need to have the inevitable conversation with all my close friends, which I believe we will become. You too, Ashley. You’re right about the Captain and the Doctor. David is my godfather and Karin is like a second mother to me. She helped raise me while my mother was away on orders. And…you may as well know, Admiral Hackett is my father.” Another loud gasp is heard from Ashley. Looking at her, Reza adds, “If possible, please don’t share this information with anyone outside of our group. Garrus and Wrex know, as well. I’m very private with my personal life. As you may be aware, I have enemies, and keeping this information on the down low keeps my family safe.” 

Both Tali and Ashley nod their assent, understanding that what they just learned is privileged information.

Joker interrupts any further talk on their marital status and returns their attentions back to the task at hand; getting Reza onboard with the vid. “This is a big deal, babe. David’s right. After the Blitz, your image recruited millions to join. As the first human Spectre, you’re a symbol of all humanity. This is just the beginning. Your image is going to be used again, no matter whether you approve or not. This is your chance to grab it by the balls and run with it on your own terms. I’ll be with you, of course.” Leaning in, he briefly kisses her on the lips. “I supported your candidacy to Spectre before. I’m supporting you now.” 

“Your image after the Blitz was what inspired me to join, Commander,” Ashley adds in encouragement, proving that the idea has merit, since it worked for her. 

Reza huffs and rolls her eyes, her tense shoulders relaxing slightly. As she looks around the room, she feels slightly mollified when she sees that Karin is nodding at her while the others are smiling in their encouragement. Damn it, Joker’s right. She may as well use this to her advantage and finally agree with certain stipulations. Leaning in to kiss his cheek, she then turns back towards her mentor and sighs. “Fine. But, we’re doing this my way. Got it?”

“Roger that.”

{{{}}}

“That went well. The director is going to have an apoplectic hissy fit.” Joker sniggers to his wife as he joins her at the make-up station as they ready her for her close-up. 

“I don’t give a flying fuck what he thinks. I am NOT going to give in to his stupid demands. I am a soldier. I wear armor and use weapons. I don’t wear a dress and heels, while frolicking on a hilltop. Seriously? Who does he think I am…Mary fucking Poppins?”

“Actually, I think that was the ‘Sound of Music,’” Kaidan pipes up, correcting her movie reference. 

“Whatever.”

Joker shares a smile with Kaidan as they wait for this shit-show to commence. After Reza had finally agreed to make the vid, they had all changed into their dress uniforms in preparation for their meeting at Alliance HQ, prior to the ceremony in the Council chambers. Only Reza had brought hers since she was currently decked out in her N7 armor. Karin, Tali, Ashley, Garrus, Wrex, and others in their crew were to meet them there. They were all invited by the Alliance to attend whatever was to happen, prior to the official ceremony with the Council. He and Kaidan along with Captain Anderson had accompanied Reza to the studio to help make sure the vid went according to their needs and to support her. Plus, knowing his wife as he does, Joker figured he could help diffuse any situation that would inevitably pop up, since trouble followed her wherever she went. This was fortuitous, since as soon as they arrived, they ended up having a confrontation with the Director; over artistic differences. 

After a heated debate on background and costume, the Director almost fainted when Reza insisted that she use her own Carnifex pistol for authenticity, instead of their rubber guns. To diffuse the situation she unloaded it in front of the worm to assure him that it wouldn’t go off accidentally and ruin his expensive equipment. She decided that explaining the safety mechanism on the gun was futile and decided not to argue. 

He grew a backbone and put his foot down on allowing her to include her assault rifle as well, so they compromised on allowing her omni-blade instead. She won the debate on wearing her N7 armor, but lost on her appearance otherwise, especially when her own husband put his ore in with the Director’s vision. Apparently, she would be wearing her hair down, so the air fans the production crew had set up could blow it around her in waves; creating an alluring image that would attract recruits. After trying to explain that having her hair down was non-compliant with uniform standards, she was overruled when Joker stated the image was much sexier. Why that image was sexy to a Salarian too, she didn’t know, but knowing Joker’s affinity to her long hair, she gave in. The backdrop was on earth with a few Alliance dreadnoughts and a mock battle raging behind her in the skyline. 

All that was left was to pick the right song. 

{{{}}}

“What about ‘Gods of War’ by Celeste Buckingham?” Reza asks her husband as they troll through her song repertoire together on her omni-tool. Kaidan and David were behind them, peering over her shoulder, curious at what song they were to pick. 

“I don’t think I’m familiar with that song. Sing a few lines.” Joker responds and shrugs.   
~~~  
We are blood and bones  
We are kingdom come  
Fight for all our souls  
This is a war  
This is a war

We got fire  
Burning through our veins  
Sinners and Saints  
This is a war  
This is a war

We are  
We are  
The rise and the final fall  
We are  
We are  
The war cry and battle call  
We are  
We are  
We are

Gods of War  
Gods of War  
We are the calm before the storm  
The Gods of War  
~~~

Reza pauses and shakes her head, “Maybe not. That song implies we are about to go to war. What?” she says looking up from her omni-tool, distracted when she doesn’t hear anything from her husband or her godfather. Then she notices that they aren’t looking at her but at their surroundings. The whole room is silent as if waiting with baited breath for her to continue to sing. 

David laughs, “I think you have everyone’s attention, Reza.” At the sound of his voice, the production crew blink as if waking up from a trance and all go back to getting everything setup for the vid. The Salarian Director is grinning and with a mischievous smirk, he starts typing frantically at his omni-tool. It’s obvious he’s up to something. Uh oh. 

Grinning and looking a little smug, David adds, “This was the best idea ever. The recruitment numbers are going to sky-rocket once again.”

Reza narrows her eyes at her mentor and shakes her head. “Nope. This is it, David. I’m only doing this once.” 

“Don’t worry, Rez, I’ll make sure the Director knows that. I’ll just go head off whatever he’s planning.” David winks and walks off. 

“Shit. I knew this was a bad idea,” Reza grumbles to herself.

Trying to help diffuse the situation possibly brewing, Kaidan points to another song on her list, “What about this one, Reza, it has the tone of a recruitment slogan.” 

Nudging him with an elbow, Reza smiles at him, thanking him silently for distracting her from her thoughts, and looks at what he’s proposing. “Good choice. I agree. That song should be exactly what the Alliance is asking for.”

{{{}}}

…An eerie fog rolls over the battlefield as the sky turns dark. A battle rages in the background. A lone figure emerges out of the fog, battle worn and beautiful. Gusts of wind blow tendrils of her hair across her face as she looks at the view afore her. With only her pistol and her omni-blade to protect her, she calls to those who can help her fight... 

“Who writes this shit?” Reza asks no one in particular as she waits for the music to build.

“Cut!”

“Commander…please…”

“Fine. Fine. I’m ready.”

The peanut gallery, waiting just behind the camera, snicker at her interruption. She winks at them and retakes her place to start again. 

Dumbstruck at the sight of her, Kaidan states without thinking about who he’s standing next to, “I’ll admit…she’s absolutely beautiful. If I wasn’t already in the Alliance, I’d join after seeing her like this.”

Not feeling an ounce of jealousy at his friend’s statement…well…maybe a little, Joker nods in agreement as he can’t take his eyes off his wife to scold his friend for his admiration. “Me too.”

David shakes his head, pride for his goddaughter rising in his chest. True…the plot scene needs work and Reza has every right to use her sarcasm, but Alenko’s right. She’s beautiful. Steven will be pleased with the outcome of this PR stunt. Udina too, after he blows a gasket for their interpretation of his idea. 

“Quiet on the set! Action!” 

An eerie fog…

~~~  
(Meet Me on the Battlefield – Svrcina) 

No time for rest  
No pillow for my head  
Nowhere to run from this  
No way to forget

Around the shadows creep  
Like friends, they cover me  
Just wanna lay me down and finally  
Try to get some sleep

We carry on through the storm  
Tired soldiers in this war  
Remember what we’re fighting for

Meet me on the battlefield  
Even on the darkest night  
I will be your sword and shield  
Your camouflage and you will be mine

Echoes of the shots ring out  
We may be the first to fall  
Everything could stay the same  
Or we could change it all

Meet me on the battlefield

We’re standing face-to-face  
With our own human race  
We commit the sins again  
And our sons and daughters pay

Our tainted history  
Is playing on repeat  
But we could change it  
If we stand up strong and take the lead

When I was younger, I was named   
A generation unafraid  
For the heirs to come, be brave

And meet me on the battlefield  
Even on the darkest night  
I will be your sword and shield,  
Your camouflage and you will be mine

Echoes of the shots ring out  
We may be the first to fall  
Everything could stay the same   
Or we could change it all

Meet me on the battlefield

We carry on through the storm  
Tired soldiers in this war  
Remember what we’re fighting for

Meet me on the battlefield  
Even on the darkest night  
I will be your sword and shield  
Your camouflage and you will be mine

Echoes of the shots ring out  
We may be the first to fall  
Everything could stay the same  
Or we could change it all

Meet me on the battlefield

Meet me on the battlefield  
(We could change it all) 

~~~

Complete silence greets her as the last note dies away. Sheathing her omni-blade and holstering her pistol, Reza walks off the set and starts pinning her hair up again as she joins her friends behind the camera. 

Everyone blinks again, as they awaken from their song comas and applause breaks out. With reddened cheeks, Reza smiles and nods her thanks for the accolades. Taking her dress uniform from Kaidan as he holds it out to her, she walks off to go change. They have a meeting to get to and if they don’t hurry, they’ll be late. 

The Salarian Director hurries after her, “But we only got one take and one song! We need more…I have so many ideas! Commander!” he yells out at her after she ignores him and shuts the door to the dressing room in his face. He’s not dissuaded though and after knocking and receiving a loud ‘fuck off’ for his intentions, he retreats and yells out, “Captain!”

David chuckles at how Reza once again has made quite the impression, but grimaces when the Director sees him and motions for him to come over to ‘talk.’ Not expecting anyone to volunteer, he mumbles, “Does anyone want to take care of this guy for me?” 

“Nope.” 

David rolls his eyes and leaves to meet up with the Salarian, frantically waving him over. 

“Holy fuck…” Kaidan stammers, his foot meeting mouth again, as he looks at the dressing room; the image of Reza singing seared into his brain forever. If he didn’t know better, she had been singing to him or maybe that was just her intention. The influx of recruits wasn’t just going to skyrocket, it was going to spread like wildfire throughout the colonies and positively affect the whole Alliance for years to come. 

Joker sighs and slightly adjusts himself. “Yeah…” Holy hell, Rez! Thanks a lot. She’d purposefully sang the whole song to him. Guessing that this was her way of retribution for encouraging her to do this, she made sure that he’d be affected like he always was when she sang to him. You could see it in her eyes…devious minx. She knows him too well. Sitting forward to rest his elbows on his knees, he tries to hide the obvious tenting of his dress pants in a certain area. Thank the Gods that the trousers he’s wearing are a bit loose on him.

{{{}}}

After waiting for Reza to change into her dress uniform, they as a group were able to sneak out of the studio and head off to their next destination; as after speaking with the Captain, the Director finally gave in to his anxiety and succumbed to an apoplectic hissy fit and fainted. It seemed as though his day just wasn’t quite turning out the way he had planned; accolades from his peers at securing future vid endeavors with a sure-thing to bring him fame and fortune. Damn it. (hehe) 

In retrospect, the vid was a grand success and as soon as it was released to the extranet, it immediately gained favor and had over a billion views in record time. The Alliance got its ad and as Captain Anderson and Kaidan predicted, their recruitment numbers skyrocketed. This was a boon, because as foretold, Reza was soon to be consumed with her orders by the Council to hunt down the Rogue Spectre Saren and possibly even the elusive Reapers. 

{{{}}}


	17. Spectre

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: This chapter is rated 'T'. Thanks for all the kudos and comments. Enjoy!

{{{}}}

“I don’t understand. I thought Shepard was already a Commander in the Alliance. Why is she being promoted to Commander, again?” Tali murmurs to her companions, Garrus and Wrex, as they watch their friend receive her new orders. 

“Uh…” Garrus muses and looks at Wrex, his brow plate raised in question. 

“Beats me,” Wrex shrugs. 

They had been invited by the Alliance to watch Reza receive not only a promotion but the Normandy, as well, for her mission. Apparently, the stealth drive on the ship would be helpful in getting them out of any sticky situations, should they arise. Being a technological marvel of Human/Turian design, it was a no-brainer of the Alliance’s to loan the Normandy to the Commander while assigned to the Council as a Spectre. That way, they could be privy to any decisions made during Shepard’s mission. Sneaky bastards. 

However, it seems that Shepard was not taking the news of being promoted to take command of the Normandy as good news at the moment, based on her facial expressions. She was clearly pissed off. Knowing that the only way Reza would be named CO, was because her godfather was reassigned. Wanting to congratulate her, Garrus and Wrex were about the join her, when they notice her taking the Captain aside to speak to him, privately. Instead, Garrus waves over the closest Alliance officer, Doctor Chakwas, to explain the inner workings of Alliance ranks and responsibilities, since he was curious too. 

Chakwas smiles as she tried to explain. “Shepard was a ‘Lieutenant Commander’ prior to this promotion. That rank can be referred to as LC or Commander, dependent upon whether they have a leadership role, or not. As the case of Shepard, she was the Executive Officer in charge under Captain Anderson on the Normandy, thus the use of 'Commander' was appropriate. As of today, the rank is official and now that the Captain has been reassigned, she has taken the role of CO, as well.” She pauses when they nod in understanding. “Similar to this, I hold the rank of Major in the Alliance. The same rank as Captain. However, since my position is based on my role as the CMO, the rank of Major is used for a specialty role not a leadership one, unless directly related to my specialty.” Noticing her audience’s eyes are glazing over, she laughs, “Never-mind. Just suffice it to say that Commander Shepard is now in charge of the Normandy and its crew. Along with her Spectre status, she’ll be able to command troops not only within the Alliance but others under the Council, as well as make decisions on behest of them. This is a huge responsibility.” 

Garrus thanks the doctor for her explanation and after exchanging a quick look with Wrex who grunts in reply, they walk over to the newly minted ‘Commander,’ to congratulate her. 

Karin watches them walk away and sighs, chuckling. She’s momentarily taken aback when Tali stays behind and gets her attention by placing her hand on her arm. It seems the young Quarian is very inquisitive and is taking her pilgrimage seriously; learning all she can.

“So…as a Major, although specialized as a Doctor, you can take command of the Normandy because you outrank Shepard?” Tali asks, still confused about the inner workings of the chain of command structure within the Alliance. 

“Not technically,” Karin says and adds to clarify further, "Especially not now that Reza is a Council Spectre. She outranks most everyone, including the Alliance brass. However, she wouldn’t go that far, unless it directly violates her mandate and/or mission assigned by the Council.” Sighing, Karin tries to put another perspective on Tali’s question. “As the CMO, if I found Reza to be medically unsound, like if she was injured in some way, I can deem her unfit to lead and put her on medical leave, without prior approval. However, since I’m not in the command structure on the Normandy, I would only take over if no one in line under her was available or deemed unfit to take command in her stead.”

Tali groans and shakes her helmeted head. “Why is it so complicated?” 

Karin smiles, “Welcome to the Alliance.” 

Tali tilts her head at the Doctor, inquisitively, and nods. “I think I understand. If the CO, XO, or any other person designated to take command after Shepard is deemed unfit or unavailable, then you can take command as the highest ranked specialist on board, until someone else is appointed. Right?”

“Actually…yes. That’s exactly what I was trying to explain.” Karin smiles, “You have an uncanny understanding of the bottom line, Tali. If you have time, I’d like to finish our discussion on facial and hand gestures from earlier…” and leads her over to the other side of the room where they wouldn’t get distracted. 

{{{}}}

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Reza asks her godfather after pulling him aside after the brass led by her father left the room. 

David sighs and rubs the back of his neck in frustration. “I couldn’t. I was told by your father and our Ambassador to wait until your ceremony to explain it to you.” Noting that Reza is waiting for more, he sighs again and starts. “With my obvious personal history with Saren, the Brass and the Ambassador felt it was appropriate for you to take command of the Normandy. As a Spectre, you will have full autonomy and can go places no other in the Alliance can go without tons of red tape. As a Council Spectre you will be able to speak for the Council if need be.”

Waving that announcement aside for the time being, Reza frowns, “It’s your ship. You were the one to put the crew together. This was your command. It feels wrong to take it from you.”

David gives her a slight grin, feeling touched that she cares so deeply for his efforts. He lifts her chin, so he can look her in the eye. “Reza, you are my protégé…my goddaughter. I’ve been grooming you for this role your whole Alliance career. I’ve never been more proud of you than I am today. You deserve this promotion. The Normandy and its crew are privileged to have such a Commander as you. I don’t know anyone who is more qualified or loyal and steadfast than you. With them at your back, you are unstoppable, and you WILL succeed.”

Reza gives her godfather a hug, her eyes tearing up from the emotion welling after his declaration. “Thank you.”

Pulling away, David grips her shoulders, “Besides…I hear that a certain Commander can’t stand dealing with political bullshit.”

Reza groans and lets out a quick laugh, wondering where he’s going with this. “True.”

“I’ve been assigned to be your liaison on the Citadel. I’ll help smooth the ripples you cause in your investigation.”

“As if I ever make waves or piss people off.” Reza scoffs. 

David laughs and rolls his eyes. “Uh huh.”

Reza grins at him and then turns towards her friends, who have joined them. 

“Congratulations, Commander,” Garrus says as he holds out his hand; knowing the human gesture from his time at C-Sec. 

“Thank you Garrus. Wrex.” She acknowledges her friends and grins at her husband as they join her and David. Eyeing her friends, she suddenly turns back to her godfather, and asks curious to the answer. “So…who’s my XO?”

David looks through their new orders on his omni-tool. “Lt Pressly.”

Joker chokes and groans, “Seriously?”

“What’s wrong with him?” David asks, not seeing the problem with the Lt. Sure, he’s not a ground pounder or had much combat experience, but as a brilliant navigator, Lt. Pressly would make a great XO. The only negative David can think of was that he was a by-the-book officer; a trait that would assuredly have him butting heads with Shepard. But, he had every confidence that they would work out the kinks…eventually. “He has exemplary service and even served in the Blitz on the Agincourt.” 

Raising her eyebrows in surprise at hearing about Pressly’s history in the Blitz, Reza states. “He’s a Staff Lt. Is he being promoted, as well? Don’t Joker and Kaidan have sufficient time in grade and service?” Both men straighten and look intently at her and the Captain. 

Joker looks wide-eyed at his wife and grimaces when he sees her wink at him. ‘Please no…’ he thinks to himself. He’s not a people person. You kind of have to be, to be the XO. He’s not fond of Lt Pressly, especially after the man had been nosy about his condition, but he would gladly bow out and let the man take the position. See…as Flight Lieutenant and head-pilot, he was technically in the same position as Pressly as head navigator. Feeling suddenly sick, Joker keeps his mouth shut, waiting to hear the answer. 

Seeing how uncomfortable Joker is suddenly looking, David hides his smile and replies to Reza. “No. Lt Pressly has slightly more time in grade and service than Lt Alenko. It seemed prudent to assign an XO who would primarily stay on-ship; since most likely your Marine lead would typically serve with you groundside. However, should Lt Pressly become ill or incapacitated, Lt Alenko will serve as third in command.” Pausing, to let that information sink in, David notices Joker shift on his crutches, an un-answered question lingering in his eyes. Answering him directly, he adds. “Regarding the fact that you have more time in service and grade then both Lieutenant Alenko and Pressly, as you are married to the CO, you’ve been removed from the chain entirely.” 

“Phew!” Joker exclaims loudly making the rest of them laugh. 

“Gee…thanks, babe,” Reza laughs as she pokes her husband in the side making him squirm away from her. 

“No, thank you! I knew there was a reason why I married you.”

“Harhar…” Reza rolls her eyes.

David gets their attention and with tongue in cheek, he adds, winking at his goddaughter. “However, as Council Spectre, Reza has full autonomy to assign whomever she wants to take command in her absence.”

Joker gasps and eyeballs his wife as she starts to grin evilly at him.

“The Alliance hopes that Commander Shepard gives Lt Pressly a chance though.” David adds after witnessing their exchange, laughter making his voice husky. 

Noting the caution in her godfather’s voice, Reza nods at him and then turns back to her husband. “Better not piss me off, then.”

Joker pouts at her, which sets off another round of laughter in their little group. 

“On that note…we’d better go. The Council is waiting for us.”

Leaning forward to give Joker's lower protruding lip a small nip, she smiles at her friends and pouting husband. “Time to go.”

{{{}}}

The turnout in the council chambers was impressive. Every inch of space on the floor and balcony level was filled to the max with people wanting to witness this momentous occasion. Most of the attendees were human of course, with a spattering of other races mixed in. Reza and party, which consisted of; the top brass of the Alliance, her father and mother, Captain Anderson, Reza’s ground teams and new crew mates, and of course the human Ambassador, were all waiting with bated breath for the proceedings to start. Everyone not in uniform was decked out in finery. This was a moment in history…was it not? Reza wore her dress uniform, new rank fashioned to her lapels. She may be about to become a Spectre and work for the council, but she was also a decorated soldier of the Alliance. She wanted to represent both. Standing on the ramp that led up to the dais where the councilors were standing, she was flanked by her husband and parents, with the Ambassador and Captain Anderson on either side of her. 

~~~

“Commander Rezana René Shepard, please step forward,” Counselor Tevos declares after the request for silence has been given and acknowledged.

Reza turns briefly to smile and squeeze her husband’s hand, then looks at her father and David, receiving nods of encouragement, and steps forward to the lip of the ramp and stands at attention facing the three counselors. 

The Asari Counselor makes a small gesture to the Salarian and Turian Counselors and they each touch their consoles in front of them. “It is a decision of the council that you be granted all the powers and privileges of the Special Tactics and Reconnaissance branch of the Citadel.”

“Spectres are not trained, but chosen. Individuals forged in the fire of service and battle, those whose actions elevate them above the rank and file.”

“Spectres are an ideal, a symbol. They embody courage, determination, and self-reliance. They are the right hand of the Council, instruments of our will.” 

“Spectres bare a great burden. They are protectors of galactic peace, both our first and last line of defense. The safety of the galaxy is theirs to uphold.”

Pausing just long enough to let their words sink in to those in witness, Counselor Tevos adds in emphasis to Reza. “You are the first human Spectre, Commander. This is a great accomplishment for you and your entire species.” 

Reza bows her head in acknowledgement of the great honor they are bestowing upon her. “I am honored to be given such an opportunity.”

After looking among the three of them, the Salarian Counselor states their orders for her. “We’re sending you into the Traverse after Saren. He’s a fugitive from justice, so you are authorized to use any means necessary to apprehend or eliminate him.”

“I have every intention to do so, Counselors,” Reza says determinedly. 

“Good.” Counselor Tevos replies and smiles warmly at her. “I look forward to hearing from you.” 

Counselor Sparatus adds, “If any new information arises, we will forward any relevant files to Ambassador Udina.”

“Understood,” Reza replies.

“This meeting of the Council is adjourned.” Before leaving, Tevos pauses briefly to look at her. Then as if seemingly satisfied by what just happened, she turns and leads the other counselors from the chamber.

Reza is given a brief moment to contemplate what that look was supposed to mean, when a round of applause goes around the room as soon as the door to the Counselor’s antechamber closes shut. She’s engulfed by family, friends, and well-wishers, offering her congratulations. 

Having just been hugged by her godfather, she sees a flash of blonde hair out of the corner of her eye and exclaims, “Kahlee! It’s so good to see you. I didn’t know you were here,” she exclaims giving her friend a smile and her godfather an evil eyeball. “Thanks a lot for telling me.”

David laughs and puts an arm around his girlfriend, winking at her. “We wanted to surprise you.”

“Mission accomplished.”

Laughing, Kahlee returns her hug, “Congratulations, Reza, it’s a long time coming, if you ask me. After what happened to David all those years ago…I wasn’t sure we were ever going to have a human join the ranks.”

Getting a motion to come over to speak with her father and the Ambassador, Reza gives her friend another hug and pokes her godfather in the side making him grunt. “See you later this evening at the party?” Receiving two nods she waves at them as she joins her husband and parents and other well-wishers, waiting to congratulate the ‘First Human Spectre.’ 

Sigh…time to schmooze, apparently.

{{{}}}

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hope everyone had a great holiday season. Mine was alright. I'm kind of a Grinch. As such, I opened myself up to a new game and was pleasantly surprised to learn that I loved it. You should check it out if you haven't already...Destiny 2. I am a loyal Mass Effect gamer, but I can honestly say...I'm enjoying this game greatly. 
> 
> A/N: Regarding the rank structure...It’s not clear within the ME: Trilogy, what rank ‘Commander Shepard’ really is. Is she LC or CDR. Other authors have noted that she’s still a LC, never having been promoted officially to Commander after receiving Spectre status. It was implied in ME2 & 3 that she was a Commander outright. (Though…I think it’s appropriate to promote her to Captain in ME3, being the tip of the spear...but I digress.) So…in my story, when Reza receives her Spectre status, she is also promoted to Commander by the Alliance. It also makes sense that she would hold that rank while taking command of the Normandy. Adding to the confusion of Major vs. Captain (in regards to Kaidan & Doc Chakwas in ME3) it just makes sense to me (prior military) to promote Shepard. Adding another layer to this confusion…what about Vega or Williams in ME3? Vega’s LC promotion was from his movie adventure which takes place prior to ME3, but he’s still referred to as Lt? WTF? What about Williams? She’s clearly called LC by Shepard in the game…so…what the hell…I’m taking artistic liberties.


	18. Aftermath

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: This chapter is rated 'M' for language and slight verbal abusive language from a parent. 
> 
> Thanks for all the comments and kudos. You as my reader inspire me to continue writing.

{{{}}}

As it was, the party was a grand success. It didn’t exactly go the way the Human Ambassador was hoping for regarding the vid he requested, which delighted Reza and Joker to no end. However, after having a minor temper tantrum over the fact that his grand idea of showcasing the ‘First Human Spectre’ as a sex symbol was shot to shit by the Alliance; Udina eventually came around on the recruitment ad. In fact, by the end of the party, he was telling everyone it was his idea. 

Throughout the afternoon, Reza was pulled from one dignitary to another. Since, she tended to have no patience for sniveling well-wishers or ass-kissers; she periodically pulled along her father, Kaidan, or Anderson to help cut through the political bullshit and keep her calm enough to not create an intergalactic incident. 

Not too shocking, really, was it seemed as though people were taking advantage of having access to the ‘First Human Spectre.’ Reza had already racked up quite a few additional missions in the Traverse along with her search for Saren. Some of them were legit; like a minor dignitary whose brother had gone missing. She was given his brother’s last known coordinates and a hopeful smile. Knowing it was likely that the brother was dead, Reza decided to do that mission pro bono. Another mission similar to that one was an Asari dignitary who was missing a sister. 

Other requests were not so innocently asked. She was cornered by an aide of the illustrious Asari Consort to come talk to her highness in the morning, as she would like to ask a favor. Not looking forward to that, surprisingly enough, Reza was encouraged to comply to the request by her father. He made a good argument that although the Asari Consort was technically a Madam of the local brothel, she had her connections and making nice would be prudent for future associations. 

Another shady encounter consisted of a woman who wanted her two associates taken out so she could take over the illegal business to run it her way. Basically, the request was an overthrow of the space mafia, Reza style. Agreeing temporarily that the woman’s associates should definitely be eliminated due to their connections with the slave trade, Reza internally noted that she would have to eventually deal with the woman once she took control. 

After having been dumped by her friends, who had long since departed without her, since she was the guest of honor, and David giving excuses of wanting to clean out his cabin on the Normandy, Reza had had enough. Blowing off Udina and a news reporter with an absurdly long name, she along with her husband left the party. 

{{{}}} 

Midway back to the ship, Reza’s parents caught up with them and unfortunately it seemed that her mother decided it was appropriate to start her inevitable dressing down of all Reza’s decisions since becoming XO, while the men walked ahead. 

After catching the strained facial expression on his wife’s face as she stood at parade rest while her mother circled around her speaking in a lowered voice as they waited for the elevator, Joker sighs in frustration. Having been waved ahead to go without them with the Admiral up to the ship so they could finish their conversation, he turns towards his father in law after the doors shut. “Why do you let Hannah do that to Reza?” 

Steven blinks at his son in law in surprise. They had been making small talk, so the direct question said in anger was not expected. Looking blankly at the door to the elevator, he sighs. “I don’t just let her do anything.”

“Tell me about it.”

Steven grins slightly. “Yes, Reza is very much like her mother. Independent. Stubborn. Willful. All traits that is admirable in a woman such as them.” 

“I think Reza is more like you, actually. Hell, she joined the Alliance because she wanted to follow in your footsteps.”

“Harrumph…maybe.” Steven grunts. “Hannah means well.”

“That’s not meaning well, sir.” Joker notes. “Reza doesn’t deserve to have her actions second guessed, especially by her mother. She’s barely holding it together since the beacon. She was mind-raped by it and barely sleeps from the nightmares it’s given her. But she’s not going to let that stop her from succeeding in this mission. She’s determined to take that bastard Saren down. What’s been done is done. No one can change it now. Not Reza. Not Hannah. Why doesn’t Hannah support her like a mother should? Not that I have experience with what mother’s should or should not do. My mother isn’t anything special, either. But…”

“That’s enough,” Steven interrupts by slicing his hand in the air between them.

Joker straightens and looks away.

Steven puts his hand gently on Joker’s sleeve, making him turn to look at him. “I hear you. I think Hannah just wants to make sure that…hell, I don’t know. Sometimes I wish…Hannah loves Rezana very much. We all have our faults. I’ll talk to her.”

Joker blinks and looks at him in surprise. “Thank you, sir. I…” and breaks off from what he was about to say when the elevator doors open and he sees that the entire crew of the Normandy is present and accounted for. They are lined up by rank on the dock next to the ramp leading up to the ship. Garrus, Tali, and Wrex are standing off to the side while Kaidan and the other heads of each section are at the front standing next to Captain Anderson; all awaiting their new CO to arrive. 

“Atten…tion!” Kaidan yells, getting everyone to be quiet and stand ready. “Admiral Hackett, sir. We are waiting for Commander Shepard. Is she on her way?” he asks as they exit the elevator. 

“She’ll be right up,” Admiral Hackett responds. Motioning to Joker to take his place next to the Lt and Doctor Chakwas, since he is head pilot and should stand with his peers, Steven heads over to David to shake his hand. “Don’t mind me, I’ll just watch. Carry on.” 

As soon as the elevator doors open, Captain Anderson gestures to the Lt again to call attention. David smiles as his protégé approaches him, a look of surprise on her face, her mother lagging behind to join Steven. Reza’s parents were unaware that the hand-off ceremony was to take place. Since most of the crew where at the ceremony in the council chambers, they were aware of the change-up of command. However, David wanted to make it official and Reza deserved to know that she had the support of her entire crew. They were a loyal bunch. And, they thought of Reza as family and were in fact ecstatic to serve under her as their CO. During the party, he had set up the impromptu ceremony with Karin’s help. 

{{{}}}

“Commander Shepard…As Captain of the Normandy, I hereby relinquish command to you. The Normandy is a fine ship and her crew is the best the Alliance has to offer. Together with the added talents of the ground team you have assembled,” he pauses to gesture to Garrus, Tali, and Wrex, “They all make a formidable ally in your pursuit of the rogue Saren and his followers. I have no doubt in my mind that under your leadership, this mission will succeed.” 

Smiling, Reza salutes her Captain and he acknowledges her. Gesturing to her to make a speech to her new crew, she turns to look over all of them, pride in her gaze as she looks at each of the souls under her command. 

“We have our orders: find Saren before he finds the Conduit. I won’t lie to you, crew. This mission isn’t going to be a cakewalk. For too long our species has stood apart from the others. Now it’s time for us to step up and do our part for the rest of the galaxy! Time to show them what humans are made of! Our enemy knows we’re coming. When we go into the Traverse, Saren’s followers will be waiting for us. But we’ll be ready for them, too. Humanity needs to do this. Not just for our own sake, but for the sake of every other species in Citadel Space. Saren must be stopped, and I promise you all…we will stop him!”

“Well said, Commander. I am proud to have had the opportunity to not only serve as Normandy’s CO, but to have served with such a fine crew. You will do them proud, Commander. Happy hunting!” Captain Anderson smiles and holds his hand outstretched for her to shake. 

“Hoo-rah!” The Marine detail yell out as Reza shakes his hand smiling at the jubilant reception she is receiving from her crew during the hand-off ceremony.

“The Normandy is yours, Commander!” 

With that announcement, the crew erupts into applause as the ceremony concludes. Waiting for the Captain to depart on the next elevator and after gesturing for Kaidan to again get the crew’s attention, Reza imparts her orders. “Due to the nature of our mission, we don’t know how long we will be away from Citadel space. As such, Lt Pressly, please coordinate with the requisition manager to order enough supplies for at least a month. Make sure you include both dextro and levo supplies since we have been joined by Officer Garrus Vakarian of C-Sec and Miss Tali’Zorah nar Rayya from the Quarian Flotilla. Along with Urdnot Wrex, a mercenary friend of mine, they have graciously agreed to accompany us on our mission. Please work with them directly to accommodate any of their needs. They are to receive full access accorded to any ground team member.” After a few scowls and boos are heard, Reza uses her command voice to put a stop to the outcries. “That’s enough of that. No pro-human banter will be tolerated on my ship. The Normandy was designed by both humans and turians alike, was it not? They have every right to be here as we do. Remember, we not only represent humanity but we also represent every species in Citadel space.” Seeing reluctant nods within the crew, Reza continues. “However, if you feel like you cannot work with them on board, I won’t force you to stay. See Lt Pressly for your release papers. You will then leave immediately upon receiving them.”

After receiving a nod from her XO, Reza continues. “With the addition of Garrus, Tali, and Wrex on the ground team, I have asked Lt Alenko and Chief Williams to reassign the Marine detail to form into back-up teams. As a Spectre,” she pauses when a wolf whistle is heard from the crowd making everyone laugh, Reza smiles, “I have access to some pretty sweet combat gear. Chief Williams, as our Armory sergeant, and Chief LaFlamme will figure out who needs what for both armor and weapons. Tomorrow, we will meet at C-Sec requisitions to order new supplies.” 

Looking around at her excited crew, she adds one more thing that she’s been contemplating. “I know a lot of you are specialists and are damn good at your job, but are not trained in the art of war like a ground-pounder. As such, I feel that to be the best, we need to train like the best. I ask our Marine detail to set-up additional training for those not up to standard. Weapons, hand to hand fighting techniques, combat medic training, to name a few. Maybe run drills, vehicle maintenance, survivor training, maybe even basic flight,” she adds nodding at her husband. Seeing excitement in a few faces and some thoughtful expressions among others, Reza adds. “This is so everyone under my command will be qualified to take whatever comes our way. What say you?” 

A small feminine squeak of ‘Hoo-rah’ comes from the crowd, again making everyone laugh. 

Chuckling, Reza smiles at her crew, “Okay then…on that note, we can work out the rest later. Due to the nature of our mission and what we all need to do to prepare, I’m giving an additional 24 hours of leave.” A roar of excitement over that order drowns out what she says next, so Reza waits for it to fade. “Crew dismissed!” 

{{{}}}

Waiting for her crew to disburse; most of them returning to temporary quarters on the Citadel, taking full advantage to their extended leave, Reza is left with her new ground crew and her parents. After introducing Garrus, Wrex, and Tali, to them, she provides a tour of the Normandy, leaving Kaidan and Joker to follow up with Lt Pressly on the few orders she imparted. Upon the conclusion of the tour, Garrus and Wrex leave to gather their belongings to return later that evening. Dismissing her XO and Kaidan to continue making preparations for departure, Reza and Joker are left standing outside the decontamination chamber with her parents.

“I’m impressed. David showed me the blueprints of the ship as they were building her, but I had no idea,” Steven exclaims as he beams at his daughter. “No wonder I’ve received so many requests from soldiers wanting to serve on her.”

“I can imagine,” Reza agrees, smiling. 

Hannah eyes her daughter and cautions, “This is a huge responsibility, Rezana. Are you sure you can handle it? Most officers in the Alliance have to wait until they are Captains before they are given their own command. Just because you are a Spectre now, doesn’t mean you can buck the system. Respect the chain of command. You are an Alliance officer first. Don’t forget that. Remember what color your blood runs.”

Reza stiffens and puts her hands behind her back. “Yes Ma’am. I won’t forget.”

Narrowing her eyes at her daughter, Hannah leans in closer to check to see if Reza is being smart with her. “I can understand you wanting vengeance for Eden Prime and Nihlus’ death against Saren. However, I caution this approach. You are now a Commander in the Alliance fleet and you are representing all of humanity as you said before...so no more going off half-cocked like you did at Torfan. You are a Hackett and a Shepard. Act like it.” 

Joker steps up next to his stiff wife and puts an arm around her waist. Leaning closer to her, he mumbles, “You’re a Moreau, too.”

Slightly shaking her head to silence his smartass response to her mother’s ire, Reza squeezes his arm gently that is around her in appreciation for his support. These ‘discussions’ with her Mom are harsh. 

Glaring at her son-in-law for his interruption who shrugs in response, Hannah adds. “You are our legacy, Rezana. You have big shoes to fill. Make us proud.”

“I will,” Reza declares, wondering when her mother’s verbal assault will end. 

Clenching his jaw, Steven takes his wife’s hand when she starts to speak again. “That’s enough, dear. Reza has a mission to prep for. We should go.”

“Quite right,” Hannah huffs and departs into the decon chamber to await him. 

Knowing his wife is within hearing range; Steven moves to hug his daughter, seeing how tense she is. “I AM proud of you, Rezana. Don’t forget THAT.” He pulls away and tries to gesture that he’s sorry for the harsh words. 

Reza shrugs and nods. 

“It was good to see you, Jeff.” Steven says shaking his son-in-law’s hand and then after giving his daughter another hug, he adds before joining his wife in the decon chamber, “I’ll speak to you again tomorrow before you depart.”

Nodding, Reza replies, “Yes sir.”

{{{}}}

Waiting several minutes until the decon chamber cycles her parents out, Joker turns his stiff wife into his arms and gives her a proper hug. “Babe…? Are you alright?”

“Not really.”

“Do you want to join me in our new quarters? I think I know how to make you feel better.” He whispers into her ear. 

Pulling away, Reza shakes her head slightly, lifting her hand to brush across his bearded cheek. “I…I can’t. The way I’m feeling right now…I don’t want to hurt you.”

Knowing that Reza wouldn’t normally say no to sex with her husband unless she had a good reason, Joker kisses her palm that is still on his cheek. Taking her hand in his, he offers her a solution. “Why don’t you go down to the cargo bay and work off a little steam. I’m sure Alenko is still around and can spar with you.”

Shaking over the stress she built up while listening to her mother’s harsh words; both on the long walk back to the ship and just now, Reza shakes her head. “I don’t want to hurt Kaidan either. Can you tell everyone to steer clear of the cargo bay for a while? I intend to use full power and don’t want to inadvertently injure some unsuspecting crew member.”

“Will do.”

“Thank you.”

“Of course. I’m here when you need me.”

Reza leans in to give him a chaste kiss on the lips before turning around to head off to the cargo bay. 

Watching her leave, Joker internally chastises his mother-in-law and cringes at the amount of damage the bulkheads in the cargo bay are about to receive and quickly asks the VI to make sure it’s empty. Following his wife down to the crew deck, Joker returns to their old digs to remove the monkey suit he’s wearing and be useful in transferring their gear to their new quarters. This way, when Reza runs out of steam, they have a refuge to return to so he can make her feel better. 

{{{}}}

“I thought the VI cleared out this space.”

After waiting two hours for his wife to biotically dispel her stress over the harsh words from her mother, Joker decides enough is enough and ventures down to the cargo bay to entice Reza to come up for dinner or possibly a nap and more? He didn’t expect for Reza to have an audience however. Seeing movement in the tunnel between the cargo bay and engineering, he joins Kaidan and Tali as they watch the spectacle of their CO beat the shit out of the training gear with her biotics. 

“It did. Shepard said we could stay as long as we watched from here.”

“That was gallant of her.”

“I’m glad we did. Shepard’s skill is inspiring. I already knew that she was powerful, but ‘holy moly!’” Tali exclaims.

Joker looks at the Quarian strangely, “Holy moly? Where did you come up with that?” He looks at a grinning Kaidan and mouths the words again. 

“I looked up human exclamations on the extranet. You don’t say that phrase?”

Joker starts chuckling, “Not for a couple hundred years.” 

“Oh.”

“Don’t worry, Tali. If you stick with us long enough, you’ll learn how to cuss with style.”

Tali tilts her helmet to the side and looks at the two of them, “Why do I feel like that’s not a good thing?”

That statement makes the men laugh again. Before any of them can reply, a loud biotic explosion comes from the other end of the cargo bay, distracting them. 

“Wow. I haven’t seen anyone other than an Asari Matriarch attempt a ‘Shockwave’ maneuver like that,” Kaidan exclaims.

Joker looks on at his wife and smiles smugly. “Yeah…well, Reza’s not just anyone. Who do you think taught her how to use her biotics?”

Kaidan gapes at him, “Seriously?”

“Yep. Her parents hired an Asari Matriarch to train her. That’s how she broke out of your ‘Stasis’ field, by the way, learning both offense and defense techniques. She mentioned to me that you couldn’t figure out how she did that.”

“Shit…” Kaidan gapes and rubs the back of his neck with his hand. “I guess she really was holding back on me when we sparred.”

“Thank your lucky stars that she did. You’d be in the med-bay or worse.”

“Huh…I knew she was ranked at #1 in power, but I had no idea. Is everything alright with her? I haven’t seen her angry since…the gym the other night.”

“I can’t really explain…it’s not my place…” Joker starts and then jerks his head up when he hears his wife start to sing. 

(Take Me Home, by Jess Glynne)  
…  
Wrapped up, so consumed by all this hurt  
If you ask me, don’t know where to start  
Anger, love, confusion  
Roads that go nowhere  
I know that somewhere better, ‘cause you always take me there  
…

“Shit…” Joker turns quickly and crutches over to his wife who has slumped to the floor. “Babe?”

Reza pauses in her singing and looks up at him, tears pooling in her eyes. Beckoning him to join her, Joker sits gently on the floor next to her and takes her hand in his. Her lips trembling, Reza continues;

…  
Came to you with a broken faith  
Gave me more than a hand to hold  
Caught before I hit the ground  
Tell me I’m safe, you’ve got me now

Would you take the wheel, if I lose control?  
If I’m lying here, will you take me home?

Could you take care of a broken soul?  
Will you hold me now?  
Oh, will you take me home? (5x)  
…

“You are not broken, babe,” Joker interjects as he pulls her closer and cups her face. “I will always be here for you. Always and forever, remember? Without you, I’m nothing.” 

Reza smiles sadly at him and begins a new verse:

…  
Hold the gun to my head, count 1, 2, 3  
If it helps me walk away, then it’s what I need  
Every minute gets easier, the more you talk to me  
You rationalize my darkest thoughts, yeah, you set them free  
…

Getting to the heart of the song, Reza traces the contours of his face with her fingers. Using their kissing gesture, she lays two fingers upon his lips and then touches hers briefly, before skipping a few verses: 

…  
You say space will make it better, and time will make it heal  
I won’t be lost forever, and soon I wouldn’t feel  
Like I’m haunted, oh, falling (3x)

Would you take the wheel, if I lose control?  
If I’m lying here, will you take me home?  
Could you take care of a broken soul?  
Oh, will you hold me now?

Oh, will you take me home? (7x)  
…

Letting a tear spill down her cheek, Reza looks down, finally giving into the hurt she feels.

Joker pulls her forward until her forehead is on his. “Babe…don’t. I’m here. I’m right here. You ARE home…here in my arms. Right here…always.”

“I love you,” Reza whispers. 

“I love you more.”

“Not possible.”

“Oh yeah? I bet I can show you how much I love you if you follow me up to our new quarters. There’s a nice warm bed waiting up there, just for us.”

Reza lets out a small chuckle, wiping her eyes. “You’re incorrigible.”

“Yep.”

“Okay.”

{{{}}}

Kaidan watches from his position in the tunnel as Reza stands up and helps Joker to his feet. Turning aside to hide the envy he feels, he sighs in defeat, as they walk to the elevator together. 

Tali brushes up against his shoulder, making him look down at her, temporarily distracted. “You’re in love with her, aren’t you?”

Kaidan gapes at her for a minute, having forgotten how intuitive the young Quarian is. Then, shrugging, he nods. There’s really no reason to deny it any longer. 

“Don’t worry, I won’t say anything,” Tali promises him. “I understand. I may have only known Shepard for a short time, but I recognize that she is special. A one of a kind. Someone who inspires those around her. She will become legend, you know. More so…than she is now. A name that will go down in history and will always be remembered. I can only feel privileged to be at her side through this journey of hers. A side-note, if you will. As can you, Lt.”

“I do.”

“We are lucky. All of us…here on the Normandy. To serve with her.”

“We are.” Kaidan agrees. “Thanks, Tali, for putting what we just observed into perspective.”

“Anytime.”

{{{}}}

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I didn't have the intention to write Hannah is such an ugly way. She's strict in her beliefs and as written previously, Reza and her are estranged due to Torfan and other issues. She'll calm down eventually, especially after what happens at the beginning of the second game. She will see the light...so to speak. I will say, it was difficult to write that scene since I have no real life experience to choose from. My parents are awesome and very supportive. 
> 
> Truly, this will only make Reza and Joker's relationship stronger. There are always trails in life that you have to overcome. And, this is one that Shepard not only overcomes but kicks its ass...with help from Joker, of course. Thank you for reading. The next chapter will be coming soon.


	19. Drunken Escapades

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: This chapter is rated 'M' for language, sexual innuendos, and violence. 
> 
> Loved writing this chapter. It's been half written for ages & it's finally time to share it. Enjoy!

{{{}}}

Joker wakes to an insistent beeping from his omni-tool. It seems that the VI wants his attention. Groggy, Joker wipes a hand across his eyes, blinking owlishly at his surroundings and notices that he’s alone in the bed. Starring at the fluffed pillow and made bed next to him, it takes him a moment to recollect why he’s asleep for one and two, what the hell woke him up? Isn’t he on shore leave? Why is he being awoken so early? Or, make that late…geez, it’s past eleven? What? Hitting the hold button, he stretches and pulls the covers back and blinks at his nakedness. Oh yeah! 

Smirking, he remembers what led to him taking a ‘nap’ so early and why he slept so soundly afterward. His wife sure knew how to show appreciation for his intervention in her emotional vent-fest after the visit from her mother. They had christened their new quarters…a couple times. Yawning, he’s distracted from his gutter thoughts of how thoroughly they got their rocks off by another incessant beep from the VI, since he hadn’t responded within the 60 seconds the hold button allows. “What is it?” he grumbles. 

VI: [Mercenary Urdnot Wrex and Officer Garrus Vakarian are requesting access to the Normandy, sir. They do not have approval to board. The CO and XO are unavailable to give permission.]

What? Reza isn’t available? Knowing Pressly was taking advantage of the extended shore leave, Joker frowns. “Then why are you contacting me?”

VI: [Commander Shepard has you listed as third in line to approve boarders, sir.]

Huh…okay. “Permission granted. Ask that they wait in the bridge for me. I’ll meet them there in a few minutes.”

VI: [Understood.]

Still frowning, Joker asks as he’s getting dressed, “VI…why is Commander Shepard not available? Where is she?”

VI: [Commander Shepard departed the Normandy at 22:17 ship standard time. Her locator has since been disconnected. I cannot determine her location, sir.]

“Huh…” Joker grunts as he straps on his leg braces. Taking a quick look through his email and texts, he huffs in annoyance when none show from being from his elusive wife about jumping ship. “VI…did Commander Shepard leave notice of when she will return?” 

VI: [She did not.]

“Thanks. That will be all.”

VI: [Logging you out.]

Well crap. Worried a little over not being notified by Reza before leaving the Normandy, Joker hurries to meet up with their new recruits. It wasn’t normal for Reza to not say where she was going, especially after ‘romping’ so spectacularly…but not unheard of. Sometimes, after having an altercation with her mother, Reza would go off on her own to reflect in private. 

Although he would love to take credit for calming his wife down, it often took outside help like friends to get her mind off of stressful situations. Since, Garrus and Wrex were showing up early, maybe Reza had told them where she was going. 

Maybe… 

{{{}}} 

“Hey, have you seen Shepard?” Joker asks Kaidan as he rounds the corner of the mess and joins him at his table sitting next to him. Kaidan has a cup of coffee in front of him and what looks to be a novel on a datapad. 

Kaidan shuts the datapad off and puts it down before looking up at him. Cocking his head to the side, curious as to the blunt question, he shakes his head. “No. I thought she was with you.”

Sighing in frustration, Joker frowns. He’s now a bit more than worried. Garrus and Wrex had received an early invite to come aboard from Reza but didn’t know anything beyond that. “No. When I woke up from our ‘nap,’ she was gone. She didn’t talk to you or tell you where she was going?” 

“No. Why? What’s going on?”

“It’s just that Garrus and Wrex have shown up and I figured she would want to make sure they were settled in before we departed tomorrow.” At the sound of heavy footsteps, Joker looks up to see that their new crew mates have finished dropping their gear in the bunk room and were coming to join them. 

“Have you checked with the VI?” Kaidan asks before doing so. “VI, locate Commander Shepard.”

VI: [Commander Shepard is not on the Normandy, Lieutenant Alenko. Her locator device has been disconnected and she is not accepting audio transmissions at this time.]

Joker rolls his eyes, “Yeah, I already tried that.” 

“Oh.”

Settling across from them at the table, as Wrex snags the last few chairs at the end, Garrus asks curious as to their concerned expressions. “What’s going on?” 

“We can’t locate the Commander. Her locator is offline and she’s disconnected audio.”

“Hehe…I bet you that she’s off tying one on.” Wrex grins after he settles his hump against the wall, leaning back.

“What makes you say that?” Kaidan asks the large Krogan.

Wrex shrugs, “It’s just something I’d do if the amount of shit she’s dealing with just landed in my lap. I’d get drunk.” 

Kaidan and Joker exchange worried looks and then shrug. Yeah, that sounds about right. They would probably do the same thing. 

Garrus clicks his mandibles, “You know…although she’s not allowing audio contact, you can still text her. That feature will work either way. Either she’ll ignore you or…” he leaves his statement open ended. 

Nodding curtly, Joker opens his omni-tool and sends a text message to his missing wife with his three companions looking on. Here goes nothing.

<<<

Interstation text message:

Location: Citadel

From: Flight Lieutenant Jeff ‘Joker’ Moreau

To: Staff Commander Rezana Shepard

<<<

23:43; JM: Hey babe, where are you?

23:44; RS: Heeeyyy

23:44; JM: Are you okay?

23:45; RS: Fweeling fabulous. You?

23:46; JM: Me too. Where are you?

23:48; RS: Hey shexy…wanna get it on?

23:49; JM: Always. Where are you?

23:50; RS: Oh good. I’m horny. I’m in the mood to suck on your huge gorgeous yummy co…

<<<

Joker covers the screen of his omni-tool, but not before Wrex chuckles, while Kaidan blushes as he looks away and Garrus coughs. Oh good, now they all know that Reza is horny. Oh well, it was bound to happen. Reza was never one to hide that they were extremely happy in the bedroom. 

<<<

23:52; JM: Geez Rez…I’m not alone here.

23:53; RS: Ooooo… Who’s with you? 

23:53; JM: Wrex, Garrus, Kaidan

23:54; RS: Mmm, nice sandwich. 

<<<

Wrex laughs heartily after that message making the whole table shake, while Garrus continues to cough, trying to mask his own shock and mirth at the expressions on his human companions’ faces. 

<<<

23:56; JM: REZ! Be nice. You’re shocking the peanut gallery. Well, not Wrex, but I think Kaidan is going to burst with embarrassment and Garrus is going to need CPR with all his coughing. 

23:57; RS: Fine. You guys are no fun. Hi boys!

23:57; RS: I thought you said that you wanted to put another notch on our bedpost and find a new place to get our groove on. 

23:58; JM: Not on the Citadel. Why don’t you come back here to the Normandy and we’ll find a quiet place.

00:00; RS: It’s not as if the boys don’t know we have shex…lots and lots. Hey, we’re married. Mated. Bonded. Whatnot. It’s exshptected of us. And it’s sooo goood. Mmmhmm. Yummy. Wait…What was I saying? …Oh yeah. We do…have sex. Or is it fucking? Make love? Whatever. Lots and lots, lots, lots…lots of sex. Babe? How do we get any work done? That is a lot of positions. Backwards…Forwards… Knees… Backs…Upside down…Upside up…Shower… Storage closets. Ohhh, remember that one time… Mmm.”

<<<

The table creaks…but silence rings out after that text. 

Uh…Joker looks up at his silent companions and sees that Kaidan in looking down at his hands, a blush crossing his cheeks. Garrus had gotten up to go grab…some water it seems, from the kitchen. And Wrex, well he’s giving him a big grin and what could only be admiration and… envy on his face? Huh. “Um…” Fuck it. “Can you blame me?”

All of his companions shake their heads vigorously and he grins.

<<<

00:04; RS: On second thought you should come here. Nice view.

00:05; JM: WHERE ARE YOU?

00:07; RS: No clue. Shomewhere close by. Looks familiar.

<<<

“Ask her about her surroundings. What’s going on around her?” Garrus offers as a solution after finishing his cold glass of water.

Good idea.

<<<

00:09; JM: Describe what’s going on around you.

00:10; RS: Oooo okay. Fun game. I spy…with my little eye…it’s dark and grungy. I also see neon lights. 

<<<

Seriously? Joker huffs and rolls his eyes. It’s obvious that she’s not functioning on all cylinders at the moment. Maybe Wrex is right. Alcohol was one of her vices. Especially when she’d already exhausted her other vices; sparring, working out, and sex, to name a few. She was definitely not the ever observant Commander at the moment. 

<<<

00:11; JM: Not helpful, Rez. A lot of places in the wards look like that.

00:12; RS: Shlutty music is playing and…a jackass just tried to hit on me.

<<<

Wrex snort laughs. “Ha! Told you! She’s at a bar. Who owes me credits?”

“No one took your bet, Wrex,” Garrus glares at the red-armored Krogan. 

Kaidan shakes his head, “That’s still not enough information to go on.” 

“Spoilsports,” Wrex murmurs before shutting up when Joker glares at him to be quiet. 

<<<

00:14; JM: Is he still breathing?

00:15; RS: Barely. The bar is shaped like a donut and oh yeah…there’s blue Ashari shaking their ashes in my face. Jealous? 

00:16; JM: Always…but you love me anyway.

00:17; RS: Yes. Yes I do. 

<<<

Garrus clacks his talons together, making them look at him. “That sounds like Chora’s Den. We were there yesterday taking down Fist. She must have gone back there looking for the evidence that that journalist…uh, something Wong? Whatever her name was…wanted for her article. Then what…got shit-faced drunk? I’m surprised that she’s still able to text…sort of.”

“It depends on what she drinks…” Joker mutters as he types in a response.

Wrex frowns, “What the hell is a donut?”

“Uh…” Joker looks at Kaidan and waves at him to explain as he sends the text. 

Kaidan looks at Wrex, “I’ll explain later.”

<<<

00:19; JM: Stay put, babe. I’ll send Garrus and Kaidan your way to come pick you up. You know…should you need back-up.

00:19; RS: Ahhhh…is my evening over then? Party-poopers…

00:20; JM: Only until you return to the Normandy. ;)

00:22; RS: Oooo, okay. I’m ready for round two. Plus, I owe you a debt, don’t I? Come get me boys…my shexy husband needs to get his wank yanked. (Lol) That’s funny…right there. 

<<<

Garrus almost falls off his chair as he finally can’t keep in his mirth at the situation and Wrex sets the table shaking again with his laughter. Although flushing red again, Kaidan stands and winks at him, since it seems that after all of that, Joker is finally blushing. 

“Fuck, Rez. Thanks a lot.” Joker grimaces to himself and pulls down his hat brim to obscure more of his red face. 

{{{}}}

“I said NO…cweep. I’d rather drink razor blades than have your hands on me.”

“You didn’t have to hit me, woman.”

“Well…maybe you should have listened to me then. No means NO…idiot.”

“That’s no way to talk to someone who is trying to pay you a compli…” the guy pauses and stares at something behind her and backs up, his hands in the air. “This is none of your business, Garrus.”

“I believe the lady said to leave her alone. I’d go if I were you. You don’t want to get into any more trouble than you’re already in.”

“Fuck! I’m already suspended.”

“I wasn’t talking about your shitty career. I was talking about what else she could do to you with her little finger. Now scat!”

“Alright, alright, I’m gone,” he huffs and leaves. 

Reza smiles at her Turian friend and pulls him down to give him a big hug, accidentally brushing his forehead with hers. “What’ll you have, Garrus? Drink with me!” She looks around him trying to catch the bartender’s eye, completely missing that Garrus has stopped moving and is staring at her, stunned. Not being successful at catching the bartender’s attention, she’s distracted when she sees that Kaidan has joined her at the bar. “Kaidan! Join me for a drink?” 

“What are you drinking?” Kaidan asks as he declines her invitation. 

“I don’t know. It burns as it goes down, though.”

Having shaken off his surprise at accidentally getting kissed by his friend, Garrus waves over the bartender, to settle the bill. “Close the account for my friend here. Was that all she drank?” He points at the empty bottle of tequila on the bar.

“That’s the second bottle. Are you paying?”

Cringing, Kaidan motions to Garrus that he’ll take care of it and hands over a credit chit to the bartender. ”Here, I’ll get that. I owe her a few drinks, anyway.” Catching that Reza is now smiling at him, her eyes slightly unfocused, he adds, “Let’s call this even, eh?”

“Ahhh, Kaidan, you are sho shweet. Buying my drinksh for me.”

“Are you drunk, Shepard?”

She jumps to her feet and wobbles a little as she stands at attention with a two fingered salute with the wrong hand. “No shir (hic)…I’m not drunk. I can hold my liquor. I’m a Marine! I don’t drink on duty… (hic).”

“You’re not on duty.”

“Oh…in that case (hic), than fuck yeah I’m drunk.” She snort laughs before trying to sit back on her stool and missing. 

Kaidan steps quickly to the side and catches her fall against his chest and wraps an arm around her waist, letting her snuggle into him. 

Wrapping her arms around his neck, Reza murmurs in his ear. “Mmm, you smell good,” which promptly makes him shiver and his cock stir. “Like cinnamon toast pastries and coffee,” and then starts giggling as she’s distracted by the closest Asari as she dances on her pole for the audience at large. 

After getting the credit chit back from the bartender, Garrus nudges Kaidan to precede him out of the bar. “Let’s get Shepard out of here before someone recognizes her.”

“Good idea.” 

“Ahhh…boys, come on...” Reza whines as she drags her feet, making Kaidan stop. “Nobody lets me have fun anymore.” 

Garrus takes her other arm and gently but firmly starts walking towards the exit. “I think you’ve had enough fun tonight, Shepard.”

Reza sticks her lower lip out and pouts as she’s supported on both sides by her friends. “Garby…” she whines. Then, she snort laughs again, “How is it that you let me call you that? It does sound like a 5 year old. Oooo, I bet 5 year old Garrus was the cutest little thing.”

“We can talk about that another time; let’s just get you safely back to the Normandy.” Garrus takes lead as they walk out the front door into the breezeway. 

“Fiiine.” Reza pouts and pulls away from Kaidan once they leave to stumble into the barrier that overlooks the skycars zooming below. “Oooo pretty.”

Kaidan joins her at the railing while Garrus stands off to the side and they share a smile as their Commander turns her face into the wind the cars are stirring from below, letting it wash over her. 

The happy moment doesn’t last long though as low and behold, trouble comes a knockin’. 

Three Turian mercenaries step out of the shadows across the gap from them, their conversation alerting them to their presence. “Look! It’s her! Get her boys. Saren is paying a lot of credits to anyone willing to kill her for him.”

“And the others?”

“Collateral damage.”

Garrus and Kaidan immediately crouch and pull Reza behind the barrier, temporarily providing them cover. Shit!

Garrus looks at Kaidan, “You armed?”

“Of course. You?” After Garrus nods at him, he asks, “Do you have a plan?”

“You stay and cover Shepard. I’ll…”

Reza starts to cackle, drawing their attention. Smiling, Reza pulls a wicked looking knife from her boot and encases herself in her biotic energy. “Don’t worry boys, I’m not completely useless.” Doling out her orders, she readies herself for a charge. “Garrus, the left asshole please. Kaidan, the right asshole. I’ll take the asshole in the middle. Ready?” 

Kaidan nods and takes out the pistol from his hip. He’s always prepared. Plus, it seems that their illustrious Commander attracts trouble wherever she goes. 

Pulling a pistol from a hiding place in his armor, Garrus nods too, as he starts to set up a shot. 

Three dead guys…order up. 

{{{}}} 

“Why is he wet?” Garrus asks his Commander as he looks down at the very dead Turian at his feet. After taking out his target as instructed and watching Kaidan biotically lift his and summarily shoot him in the head, they both watch as Reza charges into her target from across the gap in the breezeway. By the time they join her, she’s slumped against the side of the building, looking a little green in the dimmed light of the shadows. 

Looking sheepish, Reza shrugs. “Oh…I may have puked on him after I charged his ass.” When Kaidan choke laughs and Garrus just blinks at her in surprise, she huffs, “What? I had a liquid dinner. It was going to come up sooner or later. It may as well have come up on this asshole,” she states, pointing at the dead Turian. Noticing how grungy the wall feels, she struggles to stand up and smiles slightly when Kaidan lends her an arm. Using him as a crutch, she leans into his side and grumbles a complaint. “Pfft… fucktard had it coming for trying to kill me after my only attempt to have a little fun. Geez.”

Garrus raises his brow plate and looks back at the dead guy with a knife shoved upwards through his chin into his brain and then looks back at Kaidan who is trying unsuccessfully to reign in his mirth at the situation. Shrugging, he nods at her. “Works for me…uh, do you want your knife back?”

“Oh yeah,” Reza mutters as she gingerly kneels next to her target and pulls the knife, making a slurping sound, out of the dead guy’s face and wipes the blood and brain matter off on his clothes before slipping it back into her boot. Standing back up, she holds onto her head and wobbles on her feet. “Mmm, I don’t feel so good.” 

“Remind me never to piss you off,” Kaidan says as he wraps a supportive arm around her so she doesn’t fall over.

Looking up at him and then over to Garrus as he makes a call into C-Sec, she shakes her head gently, before yawning. “I’d never hurt you even if you did, Kaidan. You or Garrus…hell anyone on my crew…I’d never use my skills on you. You mean too much to me.”

Garrus looks up from his omni-tool and gives her a grin. 

“That’s good to know,” Kaidan whispers down at her, smiling. 

“I try.”

{{{}}}

Pulling her ‘Spectre’ card, Reza and company were let out of the inevitable interrogation from C-Sec incredibly fast with the promise that Garrus would finish the ‘paperwork’ first thing in the morning. Once released, they continued onward towards the skycab stand. 

As their cab lands, Reza, who is feeling pretty good since puking, immediately heads for the driver’s seat. As she is about to grab the handle on the door, she is cut off by Garrus as he grabs onto her and pulls her back towards him. “Where are you going, Shepard?”

“What? I’m driving?” 

“NO!” both of her companions yell out.

Reza turns to face them and folds her arms and cocks her hips to the side, glaring at them. “Why not? I’m perfectly capable…” she pauses when she sees both Garrus and Kaidan shake their heads at her, their eyes a little wild. “Why do I get the impression that you don’t like my driving skills?” 

They look at each other and then back at her, both stumbling to find the words that will explain why without angering her. 

Reza starts chuckling, “Pfft…I’m joking! Of course, I can’t drive. I’ve been drinking. I just wanted to see those exact looks on you faces. Ha!” She turns away and opens the door to the back seat and climbs in. 

Garrus and Kaidan look at each other and although they don’t say anything, they are both internally relieved that not only is Shepard not mad but she’s not driving either. They’ve both had harrowing experiences with their Commander at the wheel. Although, they will presumably have many more experiences in the Mako, this time they are saved by Shepard’s drinking. Phew! 

{{{}}}

“Home sweet home,” Reza exclaims as she and Kaidan head out of the elevator and over to the observation deck that overlooks the Normandy. 

After Garrus had insisted on driving, they had landed at C-Sec and parted ways. He’d decided it would be prudent to head off any additional questions C-Sec may have regarding their involvement in the altercation outside Chora’s Den, before it delayed their departure. This left Kaidan and Reza on their own as they made their way up to the docks. 

“She is a beautiful ship,” Kaidan agrees bringing her out of her thoughts, and joins her at the railing. 

Reza hums in agreement.

Kaidan looks at her and purses his lips before asking, “Today was…quite the day.”

Leaning her elbows on the railing, she hunches her shoulders and nods at him. “Yeah…it was.”

Gently placing his hand on her arm, Kaidan asks, “Are you okay, Reza? I’m here…you know, if you need to talk to someone.” 

Reza gives him a tired smile. “I’m… well I was going to say fine, but I can’t lie to you. To be honest…I don’t know what I am.”

Kaidan nods, understanding. 

“But, I will be.”

Squeezing her forearm again, Kaidan lets go. “I believe in you.”

Straightening enough to lean against the railing, Reza turns towards him. “How is it you always know what to say to make me feel better. Do you read minds, Kaidan?” 

Kaidan chuckles and shakes his head. “I’m just being honest with you, too. After everything you’ve been through since I’ve known you…it seems that you can move mountains. You can do this Commander. With us behind you…along with the Normandy… WE can do this,” he says as he waves his hand at the Normandy looming afore them. 

“Damn right we will!” Reza exclaims and smiles at him. She holds out her hand towards him and as he shakes it, she leans in, “And, you’re not behind me, Kaidan. You’re beside me. We,” she mimics his gesture as she waves at the ship, “Together, are a force to be reckoned with and will overcome any odds.”

“Hoo-rah,” Kaidan exclaims. 

They share a smile and are about to enjoy the view once more when they are distracted by the elevator. Thinking it’s probably a crew member, they automatically straighten their stance. It may be after two in the morning, but they are Alliance officers to the core. 

However, instead of crew, they are surprised to see Garrus and another Turian approach them. 

The latter Turian was dressed in the robes of the Turian Consulate and carried himself with purpose and aplomb. 

Recognizing the strained look upon Garrus’ face…it’s obvious that he’s agitated at his companion. Reza sighs internally and thinks to herself, ‘What now?’ 

Before Garrus can speak, the other Turian haughtily looks down at her clicking his mandibles in irritation, before dismissing her and turning towards Kaidan, instead. “Human,” he sneers, “You are the Spectre, correct?” 

When Kaidan turns red in anger and is about to speak out, Reza lays a hand on his shoulder and shakes her head, giving him a look that conveys the slight isn’t worth getting upset over. 

“I… am Spectre Shepard. What can I do for you…Mr…?” Reza speaks out, making the Turian blink at her in surprise. 

The Turian chuffs in annoyance and looks down at his omni-tool to type vigorously, ignoring her question for the moment. “My information is hardly ever inaccurate. It made no mention that the ‘First Human Spectre’ was a FEMALE human.” 

Reza raises an eyebrow at Garrus who is shaking his head in wonder at this moron who obviously lives under a rock, since the announcement about her Spectrehood went station wide. Besides which, Garrus wouldn’t be surprised if the rest of council space didn’t already know by now, it being kind of a bid deal and all. 

“Well…I am.” 

After a minute of silence, Garrus coughs and the Turian messenger raises his head and blinks at them. “What?” Seeing their expectant faces, he straightens and resumes his haughty demeanor. “I’m the assistant to the assistant secretary for Councilor Sparatus’ office.”

Reza blinks… ‘Assistant to the assistant, huh?’ She bites her lip and tries not to laugh out loud as she looks at her friends, who are also trying to reign in their mirth over this blowhard’s attitude. He obviously thinks his shit doesn’t stink. 

“Again…what can I do for you?” Reza asks, her voice shaking a little as she gets control over herself. What a worm…

The Turian straightens even more and looks bored as he looks down at her. “I have been asked to summon you to the Councilor’s chambers. Councilor Sparatus needs to talk to you immediately.”

“Why didn’t you say so?” Reza huffs in annoyance. Looking at her team, she asks, “Garrus, Kaidan, would you like to accompany me? I know it’s late, but…”

The Turian messenger speaks up, “Hold up…Councilor Sparatus has already retired for the evening.”

Clenching her jaw, Reza frowns, barely containing her agitation at this announcement. Excuse me? “You mentioned that the Councilor needed to speak to me immediately.”

“Yes. Councilor Sparatus’ order was given to me earlier today. However, since I was busy with other priorities, I wasn’t able to deliver this message until now. So, you will have to wait to see him. He won’t be available until the morning.”

Reza clenches her fists at her sides and is about to unleash her biotic fury on the guy, when Kaidan places a hand on her shoulder, calming her instantly. 

“At what time does the Councilor arrive in his chambers?” Kaidan asks, his body tense with anger. 

“Hmm?” The Turian responds and looks up at him, having already gone back to his omni-tool. Shrugging, he returns to what he was doing and responds. “Oh… the Turian Councilor arrives when he arrives. Sometime in the morning I would expect. I am not the one who has access to his schedule. Since you are already late, consider yourself lucky if he even wants to meet with you tomorrow.”

Out of his peripheral vision, he sees both the other Turian and Human male move to restrain the female Spectre as she alights with biotic energy. Startled, he backs up, turning his omni-tool off.

“You may want to leave, now,” the C-Sec officer says between clenched teeth, his subharmonics telling him to hurry. 

Nodding, he straightens himself and as he backs away, he takes one more potshot at the already enraged human. Obviously, he doesn’t know when to quit. “You’re dismissed,” and squeals as he runs to the elevator, when the human female lunges and is immediately set upon by her companions. 

{{{}}}

“Son of a… FUCK!” 

Reza hides her face with her hands as she relaxes into the arms on either side of her. “Will this day ever end?” she grates out behind her palms. 

“What a jackass…” Kaidan hisses as he lets go of her as she pulls away to lean against the railing once again, her back to the ship as she faces her friends. 

“Can’t I just have a hangover? I really really wanted one,” she whines.

Kaidan chuckles a bit, “The life of a biotic, Ma’am.”

“Are you going to be okay, Shepard?” Garrus asks her as he looks back at the closed elevator and then at her. “About this meeting…”

“Who knows…Sparatus already hates me. What’s this going to do…make him hate me more?” Reza huffs and shrugs. 

After sharing a concerned expression with Kaidan, Garrus tugs Reza to her feet and pulls her into the docking arm for the Normandy. “Well, if it’s any consolation, I’ll still accompany you.”

“Me too,” Kaidan adds.

“Awww, you guys are so sweet. I couldn’t ask for better companions. Sure…if you want to add torture to your morning… more’s the merrier. I think I’ll invite my father, too.” 

“Good idea,” they both say as they are enclosed into the decon chamber. 

Quite the emotional roller coaster this day turned out to be. Holy hell! Reza can only imagine what the next day will bring as the Citadel cycles from one day to the next. 

{{{}}}

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Chora's Den really is in the shape of a donut if you exclude Fist's office. Just wanted to confirm that I wasn't drinking when I wrote that scene. 
> 
> I still can't believe that I've written over 100,000 words and I'm still in the beginning of the game. Geez. After this next chapter, it will pick up. I promise. :)


	20. Don't Let Me Go

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thanks for all the comments and kudos. This chapter is rated 'M' for language.
> 
> Enjoy! :)

{{{}}} 

The morning didn’t quite go as expected. Expected as in…crashing and burning the precarious relationship Reza already had with Councilor Sparatus. 

What finally transpired between them definitely didn’t improve their relationship, but it didn’t wreck it either. So…in retrospect, Reza thought the meeting ended in a stalemate; with neither side liking the other, but willing to remain professionally respectful of each other in public … with a little back stabbing in private. 

And the cause of the stalemate was due to Reza’s forethought of bringing a ‘big gun’ with her to the Councilor’s office. Meaning… her father. Or rather the version of her father that was a decked out Alliance Admiral in charge of the 5th fleet that patrolled council space. Sometimes, you have to use the advantages you have to make an impression. And, while accompanied by Garrus and Kaidan, as promised, they definitely made an impression when they arrived promptly the next morning ready to go to war, so to speak. 

After scaring the shit out of the office staff by refusing to not only leave but relinquish their weapons (yeah, they were all armed) without seeing the Councilor, it finally took the threat to pull the fleet off patrol before the Councilor finally decided to grace them with his presence. 

Let’s just say…he was pissed as all hell, but after Councilor Tevos was brought in to calm the respected parties, all was well with the galaxy again. And, in fact, once the cause of their lateness was identified as an error in communication, mister Turian hothead asshat that Reza will always think of him as, finally cooled off and got down to what he summoned Reza to his chambers for. 

{{{}}}

“This is my sister…Mirium Kryik. Nihlus’ mother.”

Reza relaxes her posture and bows her head in deference to the older Turian woman and her bond-mate. They were vid comm-ing in from their quarters in the Presidium. Nihlus’ mother was a diplomat. After introducing her father and Kaidan to the couple; Garrus having been already familiar to them since his parents were friends of theirs, she greets them in kind. “Madam Kryik. Mister Kryik. It is an honor and a pleasure to meet you.”

The grief of losing her son still apparent on her face, Nihlus’ mother bows her head in greeting. “Likewise. Please call me Mirium.” She pauses when Sparatus starts to sputter in outrage over the permission to use her common name and not one of respect. Looking at her brother, Mirium clicks her mandibles in irritation and then turns back to her, looking apologetic. “Please don’t mind my brother. His prejudice has rendered him incapable of seeing the good in other species.”

Sparatus huffs in annoyance, “It’s the humans who…”

“Decian!” Mirium clucks loudly, interrupting him. “Sit your ass down and shut up. It’s my turn to talk.”

Shuffling his feet, Sparatus lowers his head as if in defeat, and mutters, “Yes Mirium,” before turning and sitting at his desk. 

During the exchange, Reza looks wide-eyed at Garrus who looks back at her with the same shocked expression. Apparently, he too is surprised by the exchange. It’s not every day that you see the indomitable Turian Councilor get verbally bitch-slapped by none other than his own sister.

“As I was saying, before being so rudely interrupted,” Miriam glares at her brother who looks sheepish before turning away, “I wanted to meet you, Commander. Nihlus spoke so highly of you and often. My son and I were very close. I suppose it was because he never settled down or was lucky enough to secure a bond-mate, but he often spoke of you and your adventures together. Well, what he could tell me, anyway.”

“Yes. Nihlus told me he was close to his parents.” Reza remembers and smiles sadly. After working out their differences during their time together, they shared stories of growing up in their respective families. She was always envious of his relationship with his mother. “I just never expected to meet you…Mirium. Please, call me Reza.”

“Reza…yes, I wanted to meet you when you last were on the Citadel, but unfortunately, I was called back to Palaven. By the time I returned, you had already transported to Arcturus and then…well, Eden Prime happened.”

Reza looks away and tries to keep from crying. Her grief from the loss of her partner is still too recent…too raw, for her to try to control her emotions. 

Catching the raw emotion Reza was unconsciously showing and unsuccessfully trying to hide from her, Mirium’s subharmonics let out a purr of acknowledgement regarding how meeting the human Commander had been the right choice before making her decision. After months of hearing about the human female and the reverence her son had for her, she admits she was extremely curious. Especially, when her son informed her that the human female he revered and desired so much was not only bonded to another but refused to give in to his seductions; a fete that amused her to no end. She was very aware of her son’s reputation as a ladies man and how his status as a Spectre and family connections attracted females of all species into falling into his bed. She used to tease her son that it was Reza’s refusal to let off steam with him more than his desire for her to be his bond-mate that made Mirium want to meet her. Acknowledging the emotion, Miriam states, “You obviously cared greatly for him…as he did for you.”

Reza smiles sadly and remembers her conversation the other day with David about just how much Nihlus had cared for her. She did care for him…greatly. Although her feelings were platonic, their partnership was strong. When you put your life in someone else’s hands and theirs in yours, that kind of bond never breaks. However, feeling the need to be honest, since this was Nihlus’ mother, she admits. “Yes…though we didn’t always get along. In the beginning of our partnership…there were a few altercations that ended with the application of medigel.”

Sparatus hisses in indignation but before he can interrupt again, Mirium raises a hand stalling his outrage. “Yes. He told me. It wasn’t often when my Nihlus was bested by a better opponent. My son was quite arrogant at times and quite deservedly so, but I will admit that it was pleasing to hear that he’d been beaten at his own game, and by a human female no less. In all his years with the military and as a Spectre, he’d only ever come across a few others that could match his prowess on and off the battlefield. Well done, Commander!” 

“Well…I…thank you,” Reza stammers as she accepts the compliment and pauses when her father puts an arm around her shoulders. Looking at him, she smiles when he looks down at her, his facial expression reflecting the pride he feels for her as his daughter. Giving her a quick squeeze of encouragement, he releases her as she continues with her admission. “After butting heads for a while, we eventually worked things out and built a proper partnership; one of honor and mutual respect. It was a privilege to have known him, Mirium. I’ve only ever felt that type of connection with a few others.” She looks at her squad mates standing off to the side of the display screen. Smiling, she looks back, “That type of bond is rare. Nihlus will be missed. I…miss him. He was a good mentor…and friend.” 

Mirium looks at her bond-mate and after he nods his head in agreement, she fidgets a little. She clearly has something she wants to say. “Reza…I had an ulterior motive for wanting to meet with you today.”

Reza cocks her head to the side and asks curious, “Oh?”

“Nihlus changed his will recently to include you. As the executor of his will and as his mother, I have the authority to grant or deny his wishes as I see fit.”

Confused as to why she would be in Nihlus’ will, Reza nods in understanding, wondering what she was leading up to. 

“However, after speaking to you, I have decided to move forward with his request. You see, Nihlus has… had,” the sadness back in her eyes, “An apartment here at the Citadel. Upon his death, the deed has now been transferred to me.”

“Okay.”

“His request was to gift it to you and your bond-mate upon his death.”

Several things happened at once…

Reza looks at Nihlus’ mother in disbelief and gasps, “What?” before looking at her father and squad-mates, all looking back at her with matching facial expressions. Sparatus, on the other hand, sputters in outrage and declares as he bolts to his feet, “Absolutely NOT!”

Mirum laughs and claps her hands, obviously enjoying the aftermath of her announcement. 

{{{}}}

And that’s how Rezana Shepard and Jeff Moreau ended up with an apartment on the Citadel. Not just any apartment, either, but one that rivaled her parents. It was located in the Presidium, not far from the Tower, too. It seemed that having an uncle as the Turian Councilor gave Nihlus as a Spectre the ability to acquire one of the elite apartments without doling out his soul to purchase it first. 

Plus, it probably helped that the family of the previous owner couldn’t get rid of it fast enough after he had inadvertently had a close encounter with said Spectre and ended up not breathing. Eh…perks of being a badass. 

What was even more of a surprise was that Mirium had invited the lot of them to Nihlus’ memorial service later that day. In Turian culture, there were normally two wakes. The first was for high ranking dignitaries; professional contacts, etc., and the second service was more ceremonial and restricted to family and close friends only. 

Thinking that Mirium was implying that they attend the first wake, Reza was blown away when in fact, they were being invited to attend the second. This impromptu invitation of course led to Sparatus almost having a brain aneurism, right there in his office. It was well known throughout the Turian culture that outsiders (aliens) were strictly forbidden from attending this type of ceremony; which was why David had encouraged Reza to say her goodbyes to Nihlus on the Normandy. Even alien spouses were barred from attending at times. So, a non-spouse, non-Turian, with alien friends and family (except Garrus) in tow was completely unheard of. However, Mirium wouldn’t take no for an answer and stomped down hard on Sparatus’ adverse reaction. 

You see, it seemed that Mirium had another ulterior motive for wanting Reza at the wake. She had seen the recruitment AD, Reza had recorded the day before and knowing the affinity Nihlus had for her singing, had promptly requested a song. 

Feeling honored to have even been invited to such a ceremony, Reza and company accepted the invitation and the song request. Joker was also invited, since he was Reza’s bond-mate and Mirium wanted to meet him. 

So with little time to prepare for their departure from the Citadel and the gathering of any additional information they currently had on the few leads that may lead them to Saren, Reza and company left the Turian consulate, heads held high. 

{{{}}} 

“Liara T’Soni?”

“Dr. Liara T’Soni, to be more accurate. Not only is she Matriarch Benezia’s daughter, but she’s an expert on the Protheans.” David informs his goddaughter as they meet up briefly at Alliance HQ, where Reza has just finished filing reports on their flight plan and imminent departure that evening. 

“Now I understand why she would be valuable to Saren. Do you think she’s in league with her mother?”

“That’s something you will have to determine for yourself. I’ve uploaded the coordinates of where she may be located on the galaxy map on the Normandy. There are four systems in that cluster. To help narrow the search, I’d focus on planets with Prothean ruins.” 

Reza purses her lips as she reviews the Artemis Tau cluster the coordinates refer too. “Hmm…that’s a lot of ground to cover. However, I already have two other missions in the same vicinity. Three birds…eh?”

“Sounds good,” David agrees. Knowing what else had transpired that morning other than what happened at the Turian Consulate, he grins at his protégé. “How did the meeting go with the Asari Consort?”

“Pfft…” Reza snorts in disgust. “Next time she wants to meet with an Alliance officer, I nominate you. Other than being fawned over like I was a piece of meat, she requested my assistance in straightening out a delicate situation between her and a Turian General.”

“Oh?” David says, trying to keep a straight face over the disgust in her voice. 

Frowning at her godfather’s need to tease her, she nods, “Yeah. I guess she figured that an attractive female Spectre and military officer would have some leeway with this General for being a jackass and assuming the consort would leave her life of luxury as a hooker to instead bond with him.”

Snickering at her sarcasm, David asks, “Did you agree to help her?”

“I did. I figured that at most, since the consort is privy to a lot of information, I might get a favor or two for helping her.”

David nods. “Good thinking. Who’s the Turian General?”

“A General Oraka. Do you know him?” When he shakes his head, she continues. “I guess he’s about to retire after a lifetime within the hierarchy. Garrus knows of him and mentioned that as a close personal friend of Nihlus’ family, it’s possible that he may attend the funeral later today, too. I might have a chance to speak to him there. Otherwise, I would have to wait until we return to the Citadel. At that point it might be too late. He’s not taking the Consort’s rejection well apparently and is spreading false rumors about her. Or at least, that’s what she says.” 

David frowns, “Be careful on how you speak to him, Reza. Turian Generals are notorious for being strict on rules and regulations. Plus, a lot of them lived through the First Contact War. He may be one that despises humans.” Eyeing his goddaughter, he brightens and gives her a wink. “On second thought, he may also need a firm kick in the rear, too, so I can’t think of a better person to ‘talk’ to him. Use the ‘Reza charm,’ you are so famous for.” 

“Harhar…” Reza sticks out her tongue at him. Ignoring the teasing glint in his eyes, she asks him. “Any other tidbits from your notorious contacts you can share, before we depart tonight?” 

“None… though, there are some strange readings coming from the Armstrong Cluster. If you ever go that direction, maybe you can check it out.” 

Trying to remember where the Armstrong Cluster is located and coming up with a dull recollection of a system in the outer rim, Reza grimaces. “That cluster is pretty far out in the Traverse, but I’ll keep it in mind.”

“That’s all I can ask.”

“I have to go, David. I need to meet with my armory sergeants at C-Sec to browse through what they have in stock at Spectre Requisitions.” 

“Have fun.”

Before leaving, Reza makes a quick decision. “David?”

“Yes?”

“Have you found accommodations here on the Citadel, yet?”

“Actually, that’s what I was doing here before meeting up with you. I just put in a request for an apartment. There aren’t any at the moment for a Captain, so I’ve been put on a waiting list. Your parents offered their spare room, but they are often here and I wouldn’t want to impede on their privacy. I was going to ask another friend of mine to lease me a room in the meantime, but…why? What’s up?”

“Dad told you that Nihlus left me his apartment in his will, right?”

“Yes. That was very generous of Nihlus to do.”

“Yes. Too generous. But, I’ve accepted the gift from his parents and…well, as you know, I won’t need it for the time being. So…would you like to borrow it for the duration of my mission? Or, at least until you find your own apartment?” 

Feeling touched that Reza would offer her new apartment to him, even temporarily, was too much and he pulled her in for a hug. “Thanks... but, maybe you should check with your husband, first?”

“He won’t care…hold on…” Reza flicks her omni-tool on and messages her husband. Within moments, Joker clicks audio and responds. 

“What’s up, babe?”

“Would you mind lending our new apartment to David for the time being?”

“Nope. Is that all?”

Reza grins up at her godfather. “See? I told you he wouldn’t mind.”

David’s chest swells with emotion at the two of them. “Thank you…both of you.”

“Of course. It was nothing,” Joker smirks over the comm. 

Reza smiles in response to his snark. “Babe?”

“Hmm…?” Joker responds as if he’s immersed in something.

“You better be sitting pretty in your dress uniform and not watching porn vids in your chair. I’ll be by to change in 30 minutes.”

Joker huffs, “As if I would watch that type of vid in the bridge of my ship. I mean…your ship.”

“Uh huh,” she replies not believing a word.

“Don’t worry…I’ll be ready. I just have to finish something first.”

Rolling her eyes, she flicks the off button on her omni-tool and turns towards her laughing godfather. Smiling up at him, she gives him another hug. “Take care of yourself. I’ll keep in touch.”

“I know you will. Stay safe and kick ass.”

“Yes sir!”

{{{}}}

If you thought the Councilor’s reaction to aliens being invited to a private Turian ceremony was explosive, the sight of four human Alliance officers being admitted into the private hall where Nihlus’ family and close Turian friends were gathered was the least descriptive word used. Other than a few exceptions; Mirium, her bond-mate, and Garrus, the other attendees were outraged, scandalized, angry, and some were deeply offended. 

Before an intergalactic incident occurred, Mirium put a stop to it by telling everyone to stop with the death glares and calm the fuck down. Seriously…she used the f-bomb. It was hilarious how shocked everyone got after that declaration. However, Reza didn’t dare laugh out loud, but shared an amused look with Garrus across the room. But, Mirium wasn’t done. She went on to say that her human guests had every right to be there and were staying. So, if the rest of them couldn’t deal with it, they could leave. Then, she laid on the guilt and mentioned as Nihlus’ mother, she had every right to invite whomever she wanted to attend his memorial. That shut everyone up, right there. 

Reza was impressed with how deftly Mirium ran roughshod over centuries of Turian stiff upper lip-ness in less than a minute flat and filed it away for another day; you know, just in case she needed to borrow it. It seemed Nihlus’ mother was a badass, too. It was obvious who Nihlus got his gumption from. 

As if Mirium knew what she had been thinking, she turns towards her from across the room and winks at her, conspiratorially. Reza had to quickly turn towards her father who was standing next to her, before ruining the moment and laughing out loud. 

“Did she just wink at you?” Garrus quietly asks her as he stands on her other side. After Mirium had made her announcement, he joined their little grouping in the back of the room, completely ignoring the frown from his father for joining with the ‘enemy,’ so to speak. His father was firmly in the anti-human camp like most of the attendees. 

Reza smiles and nods, “She did. I like her.”

“She likes you too.”

After the angry buzz completely dies down, Reza and company were ushered out of the back to sit with the family at the front near the dais; eliciting another gasp of shock from the crowd. To be asked to sit with the family was a high honor. 

Ignoring the hubbub, Mirium stands and moving near the raised dais holding a holo picture of her son, she starts by expounding about Nihlus’ childhood, military life, and eventual Spectre-hood. Afterward, she invites others who knew him to get up and share memories about him, too. 

After several more family members and close friends finish speaking; Mirium with her bond-mate stand and gesture to Reza to join her at the dais, introducing her to the audience. “As you may have heard, Nihlus was shot in the back by Saren; his old mentor and friend.” As a few gasps of horror abound around the room, she holds up a hand for silence and continues. “This offense will not go unavenged. What you may not know was Commander Rezana Shepard of the Alliance was there at Eden Prime and is now on orders by the Council to not only apprehend the traitor Saren for betraying the Council but to make him pay for the death of my son.” She pauses to let that declaration sink in before meeting Reza’s gaze. Nodding, she adds, “As a friend and colleague of Nihlus, I invited the now Spectre Shepard to join us here today with her bond-mate to share in this moment with us. Welcome.” Mirium bows her head and takes her elbow and moves her to stand at her side. 

Not expecting an introduction such as the one just given, Reza looks at her husband who gives a small nod and then looks at the holo image of Nihlus and then at Mirium and her bond-mate. “We’re honored to be here.” 

On their way to the meeting hall, she had finally had the much needed talk with her husband about Nihlus and how he had felt towards her. She was hoping to dispel any jealousy Joker may have had towards the dead Spectre. Surprisingly, she need not have worried so much, since Joker wasn’t surprised and had already guessed at Nihlus’ attachment to her. As long as she came home to him, he trusted her. What she didn’t expect was that he was happy to be included, since this was the first time they could appear together in public as what they were; married. Now that she was a Spectre, they no longer had to hide their marital status. 

Putting an arm around her, Mirium continues. “As the Normandy is a Human/Turian design and as one of the consultants, Nihlus was able to install some security measures. As the official in charge of the construction of the Normandy, I have decided to come clean on information that you may find useful in your search for Saren. I’ll forward it to your father. Also, you should know that upon the death of my son, one of these security measures forwarded footage of Saren’s betrayal to me. I have since shared this evidence with my brother.” 

Reza blinks and looks over at her father in shock. So…why did the Council deny that Saren was already a suspect and require her to retrieve evidence of his treachery? What the actual hell? 

Mirium interrupts her internal dialogue, “Please don’t be angry with me for keeping this to myself until now and for not notifying you of having witnessed everything that happened on the Normandy until I took custody of his remains.”

Reza was speechless and could only blink in shock at Mirium as she looks at her apologetically. 

“Nihlus made it perfectly known that he highly respected you, Commander, not only as a partner but as a friend. Based on what I witnessed from our conversation earlier today but also from the ceremony you performed in your cargo bay, I know you felt the same for him. As such, my bond-mate and I wish to extend a formal familial connection into our family.”

Gasps of shock reverberate over the room from the gathered Turians, witnessing the exchange. 

Reza frowns and looks back at her father, who is just as shocked. ‘Huh? What does that mean?’ Still confused, she notices Garrus’ stunned expression and knows that whatever Mirium just declared in front of everyone was another cultural kick in the proverbial nuts. 

“On a lighter note, some of you may have seen the recruitment AD the Alliance just released. It seems that Spectre Shepard is a talented artist. As such, she has graciously accepted my request to sing today. Please…” Miriam gestures to her to proceed. 

Although used to being asked to sing at ceremonies and had already picked out a song she used for the loss of close friends and family, Reza has to pause, being slightly flustered from the last declaration. Not a feeling she felt often…flustered, but Mirium definitely knew how to make waves. 

Giving the videographer enough time to set up, she launches into song enrapturing the audience with her voice. 

<<<

~ Don’t Let Me Go (by RAIGN)

I’m watching myself, drifting away  
A vision so darkened, I cannot stay  
I’m reaching out wide, trying to catch myself before I fall  
Too little too late… Can you save me?

Where do we go when we walk on light  
Who do we call at the edge of night  
Carry me close like the tear drops in your eyes  
All I can give you is memories  
Carry them with you and I’ll never leave  
I’ll lay my head down, but when I lay my head down

Don’t let me go… Hold me in your beating heart  
I won’t let go… Forever is not enough  
Let me lay my head down on the shadow by your side  
Don’t let me go… Hold me in your beating heart

So let me freeze time, before it turns cold  
The moments go by, and life goes on  
The torturous stars are taking every breath I wish I held  
The love in my heart, is never ending

Where do we go when we walk on light  
Who do we call at the edge of night  
Carry me close like the tear drops in your eyes  
All I can give you is memories  
Carry them with you and I’ll never leave  
I’ll lay my head down, but when I lay my head down

Don’t let me go… Hold me in your beating heart  
I won’t let go… Forever is not enough  
Let me lay my head down on the shadow by your side  
Don’t let me go… Hold me in your beating heart

You can’t see me, but you still feel me  
I only live in your memories  
I mean something… Your everything  
You lay me down… Take me there

Don’t let me go… Hold me in your beating heart  
I won’t let go… Forever is not enough  
Let me lay my head down on the shadow by your side  
Don’t let me go… Hold me in your beating heart

<<<

As the last notes drift away, Reza looks around the room at the audience. The reaction from the audience is varied; some with sad smiles, a few with shocked facial expressions, a few frowns, and surprisingly, a few with tear-stained cheeks. One such frown belongs to none other than the Turian Coucilor. Big Surprise! Though, after looking at him again, Reza notes that his frown is tinged with confusion, as well; like he may be looking at her in a new light. Not wanting to think about that any further, Reza turns towards her family and friends and sees them looking back with pride and respect. Looking at her husband, he gives her the kiss gesture with his fingers. She nods and turns away to look at Mirium when she sniffles and gives her a hug. 

“Thank you. That was beautiful.”

“You’re welcome.” 

Gesturing for Reza to take her seat, Mirium dries her eyes and with a wobbly voice, continues the ceremony. 

{{{}}}

After the ceremony, Mirium pulls Reza aside to speak to her about the transfer of the deed for their new apartment. After requesting that Mirium contact her godfather since he’ll be house-sitting for her while she’s away, Reza is distracted by her husband across the room. He waves and smiles at her. Then he touches his wrist, where a watch would be; meaning they had to go. 

Nodding, she smiles in return and gives the kiss gesture before turning back to Mirium; who is watching their silent communication closely. Cocking her head to the side, she asks curious to Mirium’s interest. “What?”

Nodding over at her husband who is speaking softly with the Admiral and the other Alliance officer, Mirium smiles warmly at her. “You obviously love your bond-mate very much.”

“Yes. He means everything to me.”

“I can tell.”

Frowning, Reza asks, “Mirium, what did you mean earlier when you extended a formal familial connection?” 

Mirium clicks her mandibles as if she’s thinking about how to explain. “I think you know how my Nihlus felt about you. Yes?”

Reza nods.

“Well… you are the closest I’ve ever come to having a daughter. By extending a familial connection, by Turian law… I’ve adopted you. I know you have your own family, but just know that you’ll always have a home on Palaven...should you ever need one.” 

Feeling incredibly touched by the gesture, Reza smiles and hugs her. “I’d be honored. Thank you.”

Smiling, Mirium hugs her in return and steps back. “I would like to keep in touch, if possible. I know you’ll be unavailable once you depart the Citadel, but if you don’t mind me contacting you from time to time, we can reconnect when you return. You are all I have left… of my Nihlus.” She wipes a tear from her face. 

“I don’t know when I’ll be returning, but I would like that,” Reza says smiling. 

“Good. Thank you for coming today Rezana, may your mission be successful.” Mirium hugs her again before leaving to talk to a few more well-wishers. 

As they depart the meeting hall, Reza looks back at the dais, with Nihlus’ holo image. ‘Goodbye for now, my friend. Put in a good word for me and when my time comes I’ll meet you at the bar. You owe me a drink.’ Bowing her head in respect, she puts a hand over her heart. Then, she turns on her heel and hurries to catch up with her friends as they all head out to ready for departure. 

It’s time to kick a little ass… 

{{{}}}

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I just had to write one more chapter for Nihlus. This way, Reza has a personal stake in what she now has to deal with, more so than a devastated colony and a beacon incident. The loss she feels for Nihlus helps drive her...keep her focused on the mission. I had my reasons for killing him. I want to keep with the main storyline from the game. Though he was fun to write; to give his character more substance than we got in the game. Challenge. Now, though, we have his mother. She'll play a part in Reza's life. A small one, but there nonetheless.
> 
> The song 'Don't Let Me Go,' by RAIGN is amazing! No matter how many times I listen to it, it still affects me. Listen to it, if you can find it. Don't be ashamed if you cry while listening to it. It's that good.


	21. Departure

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: This chapter is rated 'M' for language and sexual innuendos. Thanks for all the kudos and comments. Enjoy!

{{{}}}

After returning to the Normandy, it doesn’t take long for the crew to complete all the tasks they needed to get underway. At the entrance to the gangway leading to the decon chamber, Reza and her father parted ways; knowing it wouldn’t be long before they talked again. Her father would be her Alliance contact during the mission, while Captain Anderson would liaise on her behalf to the council and the human Ambassador. Lucky him. 

Just before boarding, an acolyte of the Asari consort showed up to give Reza a message. It consisted of the Asari Consort’s personal thanks, a free offer of her ‘services’, and a token of some sort for Reza’s part in settling the matter with the Turian General and others involved in the fiasco. See, as they left the memorial, they just happened to take the same shuttle and due to Garrus’ sneakiness, Reza ended up sitting right next to him. Taking advantage, she had the ‘talk’ with him and after sizing her up with shrewd eyes; taking in her military persona and Spectre status, General Oraka finally conceded that he had in fact taken the Consort’s rejection badly. Apologizing for being an ass over the entire affair, he left with his head held high to go make amends.

{{{}}} 

“Ready to depart, Joker?” Reza asks as she joins him on the bridge as they wait for their official departure orders from Alliance command. 

“Yep, ready and waiting, o’ Spectre Commander Shepard-Moreau,” Joker smirks as he looks up at her and gives her a two-fingered salute. 

Rolling her eyes, she grins back at him. “I’m thinking some mood music would be appropriate once we depart the Citadel. What do you think?” 

Smiling, Joker nods. “Good idea. I take it you want classic rock.”

“Naturally…I’m thinking ‘Spirits in the Sky.’”

Quickly scrolling through their shared music preferences on his omni-tool, Joker counteroffers, “Hmm… what about ‘Crazy Train’ or ‘Magic Carpet Ride.’ Maybe some Metallica? We’ve had quite a wild ride so far, eh?” Joker looks up and over at her as she leans against the barrier next to his chair reading over his shoulder. 

Reza laughs and nods, “True. Let’s go with your suggestion and play ‘Crazy Train’ as we depart. I think we can get away with playing music while we’re in FTL.” It was a pretty crazy idea to broadcast their music preference to the whole ship. But when has she ever let that stop her? 

“It’s your command, babe. I support you. Do what you want. I’m happy to just ride shotgun. And…I’ll play DJ, of course.”

Caressing his bearded cheek, Reza leans in to whisper, “What would I ever do without you?” 

Taking advantage of her closeness, Joker pulls her in quickly to kiss her. “You’ll never find out.”

“I’ll show you later just how much I appreciate your support,” she purrs and nips his earlobe before leaning back, leaving him slightly unfocused as he reflects on the last time she showed appreciation and all his blood races south to tent his uniform in a certain area. 

Chuckling, knowing exactly what she has just done to her husband, Reza gets back on topic. “I’ll pick the first one and you take it from there.” 

After a short pause, Joker nods. 

Noticing his smirk as he starts to program their music into the ship-wide comm channel, she distracts him again by pulling his cap up by the bill to make him look up at her. As soon as she has his attention, she kisses him, hot and hard, eliciting a soft moan. “Try to keep it clean, babe,” she whispers as their kiss ends. “I know that look in your eye.”

Taking a second to come out of the lust induced coma his wife has just left him in, he pouts. “Aw, come on Rez. Don’t you trust me?” She frowns at him. “Fine. Clean it is…for now.” 

She laughs, “Fine.”

Looking at her, Joker takes her hand, entwining his fingers with hers, before she can pull away. “Do you want to let the crew know about us…like…our marital status? Now would be the time.”

“Hmm…” Reza looks at their grasped hands. Joker’s right. Their relationship on the ship will be noticed. Especially since she can’t stop the urges to kiss him like she just did. He’s too much of a temptation and they’ve had such little time together. PDAs go hand in hand with him. Besides, as a Spectre, they no longer have to hide their marital status from everyone. More than anything really is that Joker deserves the acknowledgment. He knew what he was marrying into and why they had to hide their status, but no longer. She owes him that much for sticking with her all these years.

Another reason to come clean is that most of their crew is Alliance and the fraternization regulations do apply. The ‘frat regs’ explicitly state that you cannot date anyone on your crew or in your chain of command. They also state that married couples do not serve on the same ship.   
That being said, though the regs are ingrained in all Alliance soldiers, enlisted or officer, fraternization still happens. Though, they had started dating under different circumstances, under Alliance standards, their relationship already breaks one of the ‘golden rules.’ As CO, she needs to set an example. 

The best thing to do here would be to come clean and be honest with her crew and explain their circumstance. Trust them to be able to make the decision on their own if they can handle it, or not. With that in mind, Reza nods in agreement. Now is the right time to inform her crew. Hopefully, they will be open-minded about their relationship, especially since they’ve already been so supportive of her taking Captain Anderson’s place. It’s only fair. “Good idea. Give some of the die-hards a chance to request reassignment if they can’t hack it.” When Joker shrugs, she adds, tongue in cheek. “Maybe Lt. Pressly will jump ship and you can take over as XO.”

“On second thought…”

“Just kidding...” 

Joker sticks his tongue out at her for teasing him and clicks on the ship-wide comm channel, emitting a bell tone for everyone to quiet down and listen. 

“This is your CO speaking. As we wait for our official departure orders, there are a couple things I want to impart to you. First off…the mission. We have a vague lead on a Dr. Liara T’Soni, a Prothean expert, who could give us an advantage over Saren if we can enlist her expertise. However, we don’t have her specific coordinates; only that she is somewhere in the Artemis Tau Cluster. Since it will take us a couple days to get there, in the meantime, we will scour every planet in the four systems for Prothean ruins. We also have a couple side-missions we need to prepare for, in the same cluster. Once we depart through the relay, I want to see the entire ground team, the XO, lead engineer, and the lead pilot in the comm room.” 

“Now to other business… as you are aware, as a Spectre, my orders come directly from the Council. However, as a Commander in the Alliance, this ship will still comply with Alliance rules and regulations. That being said, there’s a couple things I want to discuss. Let’s start with the easiest. As far as always saluting a superior officer when in their presence…this no longer needs to be applied. It’s a wasted effort. Unless you are reporting to duty or in the presence of a superior officer over the vid comm, then please no more saluting.”

After a couple woot-woots go around the CIC deck, Reza continues. “Secondly, I want to address fraternization.” Several boos are heard. Reza laughs, “Yes, I’m sure you are all familiar with the two basic rules; 1.) Don’t date a crew mate, and 2.) Don’t date someone in your chain of command. Due to my own personal circumstances, I will be lenient on both those rules.” She is interrupted from finishing her statement by several shouts of surprise and excitement. Looking at her smiling husband, she blows him a kiss. “Alright. Settle down people. Let me explain what I mean by being lenient.” Once silence resumes, she continues. “I’m not going to start my command of this crew by being a hypocrite. So with that in mind, I’m just going to break the ice… I’m married. And, yes, my spouse is part of this crew. It’s lead pilot, actually.” Caressing his bearded cheek once again, she smiles at him as he smirks up at her. “Due to unforeseen circumstances, when Captain Anderson was picking out the crew of the Normandy, both Joker and I were assigned. As our original mission was temporary, we were given special permission to serve on the same ship. However, now that I’m CO and a Spectre, and because Joker is THE best pilot in the Alliance, though I might be a little biased…” she pauses as several snickers are heard, “I’m not going to hide my marital status from my crew anymore. We will not succeed in our mission if we are not honest with each other. This builds trust. So, with that in mind, I will be lenient on the frat regs… to a point. If you are dating someone on the crew or in your chain of command, I need to know. If I find out without you being honest with me, then I will not be so lenient. Also, if you are no longer together and can’t keep it civil between you, then I will need to step in and make changes. If warranted, there may be some transfers off the Normandy. Also, keep it clean, folks. I’m your CO, not your mother. Don’t make me into one, either. We are professionals, not animals. While on duty, no playing footsies…got it?” 

This statement elicits more laughter and Reza waits until it abates. “The other reason I wanted to tell you about my personal situation is because you had the right to know. I understand that some people may not want to serve with me because of this. If this is so, please come see me immediately before departure and I will provide you with transfer orders to the Citadel. No hard feelings.” Reza pauses long enough to allow the deck to quiet, since several whispered comments were flowing around the deck. “Now to liven things up a bit after those revelations, I’ve decided that during our long FTL routes, we’ll play music over the ship-wide comm channel. Theme music, if you will. Once we depart, Joker will play DJ. I don’t know about you, but I’m feeling a little like this ship is a ‘Crazy Train.’ Carry on folks.” 

Joker clicks off the comm unit. “I think that went well. How many do you think will leave?”

Reza shakes her head and frowns, “I don’t know. I wouldn’t blame them for wanting to jump ship, but it’s my hope that by being honest with them, it will give them the boost to stay put. Then again, they may leave because I’m not the conventional CO.”

“No kidding.”

Reza smirks at her husband. “If all goes well, I’m hoping this crew will be like family.”

“If anyone can do it, you can.”

“Thanks babe.”

A half hour after they received their departure orders, Reza decides to give the go ahead to depart, having given enough time for anyone to approach her for a transfer, though none did. Thrilled and a little proud of the crew she’s now in charge of, Reza decides to go ahead to the comm room to prepare for the briefing and heads off to do so once Joker maneuvers the Normandy away from the docks. As she walks into the CIC, the beginning of ‘Crazy Train’ by Ozzy Osborne starts playing over the ship-wide comm channel, making her grin, at least until coming face to face with her frowning XO. 

Uh oh…here we go. 

{{{}}} 

“Commander, may I have a few words with you in the comm room?” Lt. Pressly asks inclining his head towards the room at the back of the CIC. 

“Of course.”

Once they enter, Reza leans against the railing that’s against the far wall next to the QEC terminals. Folding her arms, she watches silently as her XO starts to pace across the oval room. 

Lt Pressly stops to face her, his facial expression one of disapproval. “Commander…I’m having trouble with what you said earlier.”

Frowning, Reza asks, “Which part?”

“All of it.”

Of course he is… Sighing, she nods. “Okay. Let’s talk about this. Guessing by your facial expression, you’re opposed to my command style… my music choice… my relationship status… the saluting issue…” 

Lt Pressly nods, “Yes. I think you should check with me first before allowing such disrespect as not saluting, Commander. How do we… as officers, get the respect we deserve, if our subordinates don’t salute us?”

Seriously? Reza straightens and puts her hands behind her back. Using her command voice, she glares at her XO, “First of all, I don’t answer to you, Lieutenant.” After seeing him cringe, she softens her voice. “You will find that I’m an unconventional leader. I get better results that way. Regarding the saluting…have you ever heard the statement, respect the rank but not the man?”

Pressly’s cheeks flush with color and he sputters in outrage as if she just insulted him. 

Raising a hand to hold off his impending outburst, she explains, “I’m just asking. I’m not accusing you of anything.”

Pressly grits out, regaining his composure, “Yes, I’ve heard that phrase.” 

I just bet you have…arrogant prick, Reza thinks to herself. “Well... as leaders, we need to earn the respect of our subordinates just as much as the status of our rank. This earns trust. Do your crew proud, Lt, and they will in turn make you proud to serve them. As such, we don’t need the regiment of saluting for that to happen. It’s a bunch of BS and a wasted action. I’d rather have a salute that I earned, then not at all. Do you agree, Lt?”

Pressly nods. 

Good. Next topic. “Now, about my marital status… Joker will report to you as the XO. If any delinquency or insubordination should occur, please discuss it with me first before talking to him. He’s not good with confrontation. However, Joker is the consummate professional and I don’t see that you will have many problems with him. Mostly, he’s a work alcoholic. He overworks himself and you will find it difficult at times to remove him from the cockpit to take a break, especially when I’m on missions. Be lenient with him. I’ve hooked him up to my squad channels so he can follow along. However, during transit, let me know if he takes it too far. I’ll step in if I have to. Ok?” 

“Uh… sure. That alleviates my worry over the matter. Commander, I already knew about your relationship to the Flight Lieutenant. Captain Anderson explained it to me before his departure yesterday. I just wasn’t sure about the chain of command, regarding your husband.”

“Ok.”

Pressly starts to pace again. Now what? Is he finally getting to the reason for asking to speak to her alone? Waiting for him to start, she listens to the final notes of ‘Crazy Train’ and the beginnings of ‘Magic Carpet Ride.’ Fighting the urge to roll her eyes at her husband for playing through his music recommendations first, she finally states, “Out with it already,” tired of Pressly’s inability to spit it out. 

“I feel this music is inappropriate.”

“Which song? Or the music in general?”

Pressly huffs in irritation, “The music in general, Ma’am.”

“Why is that?”

Looking at her like she’s a teenager, deliberately doing something she knows is wrong, he explains. “This is a warship, Ma’am. This is not the place for dilly-dallying at one’s console. All of us here are professionals and listening to music while on duty is disgraceful and dishonors the uniform. Plus, I can’t believe that you would invite aliens onto our ship. This is a human vessel. Aliens shouldn’t have the same access as us. If they have to be here, they should at least be confined to the cargo bay or guarded at all times.” 

Ah…here we go. That’s the heart of this discussion. Not her relationship or the saluting, or even the music, but the aliens on the ship. What backward thinking. Staring at the man picked to be her XO of all people… What the hell was Anderson thinking? He’s probably laughing his ass off for assigning her an XO as back asswards as Pressly. Seriously considering turning the ship around to drop his ass off on the Citadel, Reza tries to calm down enough to answer him without causing bodily harm. “First of all, I am aware this is a warship, Lt. As you said, everyone here is a professional. They are all exemplary soldiers and specialists. They had to be, to get picked by the Captain when he was staffing the Normandy. Do you think he was in error? 

“No, Ma’am.”

“Good. I agree. To start with your comment about music, do you think music playing over the loudspeaker would make these professionals not do their job?”

“I guess not. I…”

“As you so aptly put it, this place in not for dilly-dallying… I assume you mean dancing or bobbing one’s head to music while working and not committing a dereliction of duty while listening to said music.”

“Ah…yes, Ma’am.”

“Now since you agree that these men and women are professionals, don’t you think that they can figure that out for themselves? If they want to dance or bob their heads to music while working and it doesn’t affect their performance, then they should be the ones to decide that. Agreed?

“Yes Ma’am…but what happens if they can’t perform while listening to the music?”

“Then, as my XO, I would like you to make sure that they do and report back to me.”

“Copy that.”

“As far as dishonoring the uniform… Have you ever heard that music can be used to relieve stress?”

Pressly frowns and nods slowly. He’s obviously reluctant to acknowledge this fact. 

“Consider this mission of ours… I’m predicting that it will be quite stressful and will put a great deal of pressure on the crew to make sure that not only are we successful in our mission, but that we all come out of it alive and kicking. Listening to music can help alleviate some of that stress.”

“But…”

Okay…different angle. Personal experience. “You are aware of my history in the Alliance, yes?” Pressly nods. “Due to my combat experience, do you think that I might just be aware that listening to music can relieve stress? I found it very helpful after the attack on Elysium.”

Pressly nods, “Yes Ma’am. I was on the Agincourt at Elysium. I know exactly what you accomplished there.”

“Now add the tension I had to deal with in regards to my survivor guilt over the bloodbath of Akuze.” 

“Uh…”

“Or Torfan… Do you think my professionalism has lessened because I used music to help alleviate my stress over my actions during that shit-show?”

Pressly shakes his head vigorously. “No Ma’am.”

Bingo. “Good. Then unless performance decreases or the crew petition to have the music removed from the ship-wide comm channel, then it stays. In fact, I have an idea…” Contacting Joker through her omni-tool, she sets her plan in motion. “Joker, can you pause the music and put me through to speak with the crew, instead?”

“Done,” Joker responds as he does as requested. 

“This is Commander Shepard. It has been brought to my attention that the music playing over the loudspeaker can be distracting while on duty. Here’s my thoughts on that…everyone on board is an adult; a professional, and has the means to govern their own actions while on duty. However, if you cannot work with the music on loudspeaker and the majority of you ask me to turn it off during our long FTL transits, then I will do so. However, in the meantime, if you decide to dance or bob your head, air guitar, etc. at your console, that is to be your choice. Be aware though that your dance moves WILL be critiqued and your air guitar technique WILL be judged and considering the characters we have on board, you might just find yourself ridiculed or parodied. Make sure you take this feedback with professional courtesy be it positive or negative. It will probably be recorded and viewed later at end of tour…by everyone. So… be prepared to take our criticisms with a grain of salt…” 

Laughter filters through the comm channel throughout the ship. 

“Also, Joker has volunteered to play DJ during the long stints between systems when we are traveling in FTL. If you have a music preference, you can talk with him. Just keep it clean, folks. If I have to ask for the song to be removed, then you lose your privilege. This is your one and only warning. There is a time and place for that type of music… Are you listening, Joker?”

“Hey…” Joker exclaims for being accused. 

“Uh huh…”

More laughter…

“Alright, let’s make this even better…a competition if you will. Each morning briefing, there will be a running tally of likes and dislikes of each song picked by each crew member. Joker will post the songs and who requested them to the briefing notes each evening. You will have time to elect which song you preferred before the morning brief is released. At each shore leave, I will buy a round of drinks to the winner with the most likes.” 

Whistles and clapping come from the crew.

“Alright, back to work people. Joker, resume play.” 

“Will do, Commander.”

Once the music resumes, Reza looks at her XO and asks, “Satisfied?”

Pressly nods. 

“Now… regarding the issue about the ‘aliens’ we have onboard… First of all, this is a human/Turian designed ship. Meaning, without the generous help from our allies, the Turians, this ship would never have been constructed. As the Alliance crew is all professionals, so are Garrus, Wrex, and Tali. They are specialists in their own fields and I felt that they could give us a hand, at this very difficult and stressful mission of ours. Without their Intel, we may never have gotten the evidence to prove Saren was not only a murderer, but that he is in league with the Geth. That alone would grant them access. They are also friends of mine and I trust them implicitly. More than anything, their presence will augment my ground team with their combined combat experience. We could use all the help we can get. Don’t you agree?”

Pressly nods a little reluctantly.

That’s a start. “Now, I can’t ask you to like them. But, I can ask that you be respectful and try to work with them, as well as you can. If you are having difficulty, please let me know. Otherwise, they are to be treated as members of the crew and respected as such. Understood?”

“Yes Ma’am.”

“Good.” Reza pauses and looks at her now contrite XO. “Pressly, I know I’m an unconventional CO and it will take time to get used to my command style, but I do think that we can move forward from this and learn to work well with each other.” 

Lt. Pressly looks down and purses his lips. Making a decision, he looks up and says with conviction, “I’d like that. I’m sorry I spoke out of turn, Commander. I guess I hadn’t thought everything out like I should have. Regarding the music, maybe it will improve performance. I’ll do an analysis for you and give it to you at the end of the week.”

Reza smiles and nods at her XO. “Good idea…I’ll look forward to reading it.”

Pressly stands to attention and salutes her. “I’ll return after we go through the relay. I want to gather the charts of the Artemis Tau cluster my team has been analyzing.”

Reza nods and watches her XO depart the comm room. 

Well… that’s one hurdle cleared. 

Now, all she has to do is; find Dr. T’Soni, figure out what the hell the conduit is, eliminate the Geth presence in the Traverse, track down the Rogue Spectre Saren and eliminate him, and figure out the visions the beacon on Eden Prime gave her regarding the elusive Reapers. After all of that… all will be well with the galaxy. No pressure. 

Eh…baby steps. 

{{{}}}

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/Ns: Music references used in chapter:   
> ‘Spirit In The Sky’ by Norman Greenbaum  
> ‘Crazy Train’ by Ozzy Osborne  
> ‘Magic Carpet Ride’ by Steppenwolf 
> 
> QEC – Quantum Entanglement Communicator, for you non ME-ers, this is a communication device that allows point to point communications with another who also has a QEC device. It has a more technical description in the game, but for simplicity, it’s a person to person comm device over vast distances. Although, technically, the QEC doesn’t show up till ME2, I’m inserting it here in ME1. That way I only have to describe it once. Author’s prerogative. 
> 
> PDA – Public Displays of Affection


	22. Mission Parameters

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: This chapter is rated 'T'. 
> 
> Sorry for the delay, folks. Life intervened. Plus, I had wanted to post this chapter with the next, however Chapter 23 is giving me issues. So... 'Here's Johnny!' Ugh... fricken quotes. :P 
> 
> Enjoy!

{{{}}} 

[MESSAGE RECORDING: 

TURIAN VOICE: Eden Prime was a major victory. The beacon has brought us one step closer to finding the conduit.

UNKNOWN FEMALE VOICE: …and one step closer to the return of the Reapers.]

After the recording ends, Reza looks out at her command staff and sees a variety of facial expressions; confusion, anxiety, curiosity, determination… and decides to lighten the mood a little. “Gee…that’s not ominous at all,” she mutters sarcastically, loud enough for everyone to hear and elicits a few chuckles and an eye roll from her husband. Mission accomplished. 

“So…do we know what ‘the conduit’ reference means?” Garrus asks after everyone returns to contemplate the message. 

Wrex huffs, “Other than the obvious?”

“What?” Garrus growls at the large Krogan. 

“A ‘conduit’ means something that acts as a channel for the transmission of something else to travel through.” Shocked silence is the immediate response Wrex receives for his insightfulness. 

“Thank you, Mr. Dictionary,” Ashley huffs in annoyance.

Ignoring the Chief’s impertinence, Wrex looks around the room at his crew mate’s shocked faces. “What…? I know things.” He points at himself, “Not just a dumb mercenary.”

“Clearly,” Joker scoffs, sitting beside his wife as she leans against the railing, her arms crossed, observing. 

“Never thought you were, Wrex,” Reza points out. “Impulsive maybe.”

Wrex thinks about her statement and after a minute he grins and nods his head. 

“Okay…let’s put aside ‘the conduit’ reference for now, or at least until we have more to go on than just a definition. What about the reference to ‘the Reapers?’ Anyone hear anything in regards to them?”

“The Reapers were a hyper-advanced machine race that spanned the galaxy 50,000 years ago. They hunted the Protheans to total extinction and then vanished.” Tali shares anxiously as she twists her fingers and bounces on her feet. “At least that’s what the Geth believe. The Geth revere the Reapers as gods…the pinnacle of non-organic life. And they believe Saren knows how to bring the Reapers back. …though, I’m not sure taking the Geth’s word is enough proof that the Reapers exist.”

Lt. Pressly crosses his arms and glares at the floor. “It’s not. Sounds a little far-fetched to me. I’ve never heard of any Reapers.”

“I have.” 

Everyone looks over at her as she frowns at the floor, reliving her nightmarish visions the beacon gave her. Joker reaches out to her and takes her hand, entwining his fingers with hers, bringing her back from her contemplations. Blinking, Reza mouths thank you to her husband and explains. “The visions the beacon on Eden Prime gave me… I understand them now. I saw the Reapers wipe out the Protheans, along with countless other races.” Letting her crew stew on that information for a bit, she sighs. “Alright, it’s obvious that we need more evidence before we figure out what that message was referring to for both ‘the conduit’ and ‘the Reapers.’ What we need to focus on is what we DO know about that message. We know that the Turian voice belongs to Saren and the female voice belongs to Matriarch Benezia. We don’t know much about the Matriarch, only that she is very powerful and has many acolytes. She has joined forces with Saren and will need to be taken care of at some point. We also have sightings of foul play at both the Feros colony and at Noveria. There’s not much information on either location and Captain Anderson has offered to run down his contacts to feel out both leads for us. So, until we have more information to go on, we will follow our biggest lead. It seems that Matriarch Benezia has a daughter, a Doctor Liara T’Soni. She’s a Prothean expert and is at a dig site somewhere in the Artemis Tau Cluster.”

“That’s it?” Wrex asks.

“Yep.”

“Commander, there are four systems in the Artemis Tau Cluster,” he points out.

“I’m fully aware.” 

Growling low in frustration, Wrex takes a seat, leaning back and crossing his arms, glaring at her all the while.

Reza grins at him and winks conspiratorially, “Hold on, big guy, we have a plan. Lt Pressly take it away.”

That’s the XO’s cue to bring up his scans of the cluster. 

After listening to him expound on what his staff has found thus far; anomalous readings, mineral caches, possible Prothean ruins worthy of a look-see, and other sites that could be explored while searching for the illusive doctor, Reza is impressed. Pressly has definitely done his research. However, he’s obviously never given a briefing to Marines before who expect a bottom line. Point. Shoot. That’s all that was really needed. Not wanting to interrupt, however, Reza stays quiet as Pressly continues to drone on about what seems to be every rock in the asteroid belt in the Knossos system until her eyes blur. 

As the Lt continues to bore the heck out of his audience, she allows her husband, who is also not listening, to beckon her to come closer. Standing behind Joker’s chair, she absent mindedly begins to run her fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck. Hmm…it’s time to cut his hair, and makes a mental note to get out her cutting scissors and razor the next time they’re alone. 

Swallowing a moan, Joker motions her to lean down to whisper in her ear. “Babe, that feels amazing, but if you don’t stop, I’m going to show everyone in here just how much I’m turned on right now.”

“Hmm…” Reza grins wickedly and pulls her hand away just as Kaidan interrupts Pressly from expounding on non-essential mission parameters. 

“So, to sum up… the Knossus system is where Doctor T’Soni is probably located?” Ignoring the glare that Pressly is giving him, Kaidan barely suppresses a grin when his Commander mouths a thank you to him. Inclining his head a little, he winks at her. It’s clear that the new XO has never briefed anyone beyond the navigation staff. 

Glaring at the Lt for his interruption, Pressly nods. “That is my expert opinion.”

“That’s actually where we’re headed now.” Reza straightens and thanks her XO as she moves to stand in front of the image of the Knossos system depicted on the vid screen. Zooming out to expand the image to include the other three systems, she asks her husband, “Joker, what is our ETA?”

“About three days, give or take a few hours.”

“Good. The Mass Relay will take us to the Sparta system first and then we’ll FTL it over to Knossos. We also have a few side missions. There’s potentially a rescue or recovery mission in Sparta. An Admiral Kohoku has asked for our help. It seems one of his Marine Recon squads has vanished after investigating suspicious activity in the area and he’s unable to rally anyone else to check on them. Since we are headed already in that direction… I offered to help. He’s also a close personal friend of my father’s, so the sooner we can find his missing Marines the better. Since this is an Alliance mission… Alenko and Williams, you’re with me.” Waiting for their nods, Reza adds. “Although Williams, you have exemplary skills on the Mako’s canon, I need your focus elsewhere, so I would like you to join us, Wrex.” 

Wrex grins and nods.

“We also have a missing sister in the Macedon system and after we search for the illusive doc, we’ll search for her. Lt Pressly, please assign a team to analyze the data the dignitary sent us in regards to her sister’s capture and possible whereabouts.”

“Roger that,” Pressly nods in assent. 

{{{}}}

“Now, I want to talk about team and duty assignments. We have a lot of experience here and it would be a shame to waste it.”

A throat is cleared and Reza nods at Lt Adams, her chief engineer.

“Ma’am, I would like to request that Tali be assigned to engineering. As I’ve already observed, she would be an asset to my staff.”

Reza looks at her Quarian friend, “Tali? It’s up to you.”

“I would love to,” Tali exclaims, bouncing on her feet in her excitement.

Chuckling, Reza nods. “When you’re not on ground team missions then please report to Lt Adams for assignment.”

Tali squees in glee over having direct access to the ship she is growing to love. 

“Now, Garrus, you’ve expressed interest in maintaining the Mako. Are you sure that’s all you would like to attribute? You have many other skills.”

Garrus looks down and scuffs his armored feet on the deck plating. “I figured you would assign me as needed, Commander. In the meantime, I can make myself useful and maintain and calibrate the ground vehicle. It will keep me occupied when not on ground missions.”

Reza looks at her chief engineer, “Do you have any objections, Lt.” 

“Absolutely not,” Lt Adams grins and holds out his hand to Garrus to shake. “I’ll set you up with our requisitions officer so you can order any parts you deem necessary to maintain her and come talk to me later so we can discuss who in the staff you would like to work with.”

Straightening, Garrus nods, shaking the engineer’s hand. “Thank you, Lt.”

Awesome. It seems her chief engineer is open to working with ‘aliens’ and knows a good thing when it’s standing in front of him. Looking at her Krogan friend, Reza grins. “Alright, that leaves you, Wrex.”

Wrex straightens from his slouch and looks at her expectantly.

“Since you have often pointed out to me you have a vast knowledge and many years’ experience in combat weapons and tactics, I need your help if you are willing. I would like everyone on my crew not already weapon efficient but certified by the end of mission. I’ve already given approval to set up a weapons range in the cargo bay and would like it if you would work with the armory chiefs on certifying everyone on rifles and handguns. Also, work with Lt Alenko on a schedule of training that includes combat tactics, hand-to-hand, and sparring. Prior to leaving the Citadel, I ordered new weapons and armor. Along with the requisitions officer, make sure the ground team and Marine detail have the proper equipment for combat missions. As a vanguard, like me, I’d like you to make sure the ground team is able to defend against biotics, both defensively and offensively. That will help us in the long run. The Lt and I will help, too. That sound alright to you?”

Wrex grins and nods “Sounds like fun.”

“Great. Then, everyone except the ground team, dismissed. Let’s get back to work.”

{{{}}}

Once everyone left except the ground team, Reza sits in Joker’s empty seat and invites the team to join her. They each take a seat around the room. 

“Alright, let’s discuss ground team configurations. If possible, I will want to take as many of you as can fit in the Mako. You each have a variety of skills and talents that will enhance our chances of succeeding in our missions. First off, there are six of us, which makes this a little easier. With that in mind, I’d like to pair off the snipers. Garrus, Ashley, and myself. Ashley, I’m pairing you up with Tali. She is proficient with shotguns and pistols. Along with your combat knowledge and tactical training and paired with Tali’s ingenuity with tech abilities, I think you will make a good team. Please get to know each other and become familiar with the standard Alliance protocols for fireteams.”

Ashley looks at Tali and nods, “Aye-aye, Ma’am.”

Tali agrees, “Will do, Shepard.”

“Good. Garrus, I’d like you to pair up with Wrex.” Before she can continue, they both stand up and protest.

“You can’t be serious!” 

“I will not be paired up with a grimy Turgent!”

Garrus glares at the Krogan after being called a Turian slug that eats his own feces, and gets in his face, growling in outrage. Not backing down, Wrex shoves him away, narrowly missing taking Tali down with him, and Garrus jumps to his feet growling, preparing to fight. 

Having seen the trajectory of Garrus’ fall, Kaidan had the foresight to grab Tali at the last second before she became an innocent victim in the powerplay in the middle of the comm room, and pulls up a biotic shield to protect her and Ashley. 

Looking heavenward at the idiocy of Krogan and Turian aggression, Reza gets Kaidan’s attention and before things can escalate any further, she mouths ‘Stasis’ and they encompass the two growling idiots immediately immobilizing them. “Enough!” Reza shouts getting between them as they hang motionless on each side of the room. “I will NOT have two members of my crew fighting over a thousand year old grudge. Do you hear me? Get over it! As members of my crew you WILL treat each other with respect or you can get off my ship.” Looking at the two of them, she continues. “You two are my heavies. I need you to get along with each other long enough the see this mission through and the best way to do that is to pair you up. So get over yourselves and put the past behind you. I need you both…here…now. I can’t do this without you. Without any of you.” Needing answers from them, she motions to Kaidan to let Garrus out of his ‘stasis’ field and she does the same for Wrex. Once they are released, they stand tense as they look at her. “Am I making myself clear?”

“Yes,” Wrex grumbles.

Garrus hangs his head for letting the Krogan get to him…again. He nods. “Yes, Shepard.”

“Good.” Lowering her voice, she adds. “Now, if you take this to the ring and promise not to kill each other, then I’ll support that. Whoever wins the match, will fight me. Agreed?”

They both relax and give her a once over with their eyes and nod. They both remember sparring with her in the ring in the past. Looking forward to taking this tension to the cargo bay, later, they relax and return to their chairs. 

Relaxing as well, Reza returns to her chair and continues. “That leaves Alenko as my back-up.” Turning towards him, she adds. “Let’s talk later about the Marine detail’s skills and abilities, along with training and team dynamics.”

Kaidan nods, “Roger that.”

“Oh, that reminds me. Williams,” Reza looks at her Gunnery Chief, “We’ll work on getting you your assassination badge. I know that you are close to achieving it.” 

Ashley smiles and pumps a fist in the air. “Sweet!”

“Stay on top of that, will you?” Reza asks Kaidan and he nods. Technically, as Marine detail lead, he would be awarding the Chief the medal anyway. 

Raising her hand tentatively, Tali asks confused on the turn of conversation. “What is the assassination badge, Commander?”

Reza motions to Ashley to explain.

Eyeing the Quarian, Ashley explains. “Once achieved, the badge is an indicator that a sniper can be assigned more clandestine missions and can pad the resume for special training. Say, for instance, if I wanted to apply for ICT, uh… N7 training, then having the badge plus a recommendation from another ‘N’ classed soldier would be kudos for me.” Ashley looks at her Commander pointedly. 

Reza nods in understanding, knowing she’s vying for one from her. We’ll see. 

Tali tilts her helmet to the side, still clearly confused. “I still don’t understand…”

“Basically, the badge helps a sniper become more of a badass,” Reza simplifies it for her. 

“Oh,” Tali giggles. 

Garrus and Wrex chuckle.

“Badges? We ain’t got no badges! We don’t need no badges! I don’t have to show you any stinking badges!” Reza recites, grinning to herself. Silence. Oops… Reza looks at her team. Kaidan is trying to hide his grin behind a hand, and Wrex is looking up at the ceiling. Ashley and Garrus look confused. 

“Movie quotes…still?” Wrex shakes his head.

“What? I couldn’t help it.” Reza defends herself. “It seemed appropriate.”

Kaidan leans towards her slightly and whispers, “I know that one.”

“Haha…” she is interrupted by her husband over the intercom.

“Commander, I’m picking up an automated response from the Sparta system. It looks like a distress beacon,” Joker chimes in.

“Well that clinches it, we’ll go there next. Crew dismissed.”

As Reza watches her ground team leave the comm room, she’s feeling pretty positive for the missions to come. She has the fastest and stealthiest ship in the quadrant, the best crew, minus a little tension that can be worked around, and her husband. What could go wrong with having all of that behind her?

Famous last words… 

{{{}}}

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Quotes:  
> 'Here's Johnny!' (The Shining, 1980)   
> ‘Badges? We ain’t got no badges! We don’t need no badges! I don’t have to show you any stinking badges!’ (The Treasure of the Sierra Madre, 1948)

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I will try to post additional chapters to this story as often as I can. I am currently in the midst of 4 stories simultaneously. I blame my muse. Thanks for those who are willing to endure my 'crazy' ramblings along with me.


End file.
